Indianapolis Times, Volume 37, Number 297, Indianapolis, Marion County, 14 April 1926 — Page 4

PAGE 4

The Indianapolis Times ROY W. HOWARD, President. BOYD GURLEY, Editor. WM. A. MAYBORN, Bus. Mgr. Member of the Scrlpps-lloward Newspaper Alliance • • • Client of the United Press and the NEA Service • * * Member of the Audit Bureau of Circulations. Publlaheil (lallv oxccnt Sunday by Indianapolis Times Publishing Cos., 214-220 W. Maryland St., Indianapolis i.. SnbscVlptloii Ratcs: Indianapolis—Ten Cents a Week. Elsewhere-Twelve Cents a Week •• • PUONE—MA in 3300.

No law shall be passed restraining the free interchange of thought and opinion, or restricting the right to speak, write, or print freely, on any subject whatever.—Constitution of Indiana.

THAT LIQUOR LEAK Something more than the idle question of what became of the 330 cases of liquor which disappeared from the custody of the Federal authorities is Involved in this most peculiar transaction. The confidence of the people in the integrity of all government will be badly shocked if there should follow no action and no inquiry. The facts of the matter as now established by the records aro simple: A raid upon the Squibb distillery resulted in the seizure by the Federal Court of 1,453 cases of liquor. The court turned that liquor over to the custody of the Federal marshal and it was stored in the Federal building in Indianapolis. An inventory by an examiner for the department of justice now shows that 330 cases of that liquor easily marketable at more than $50,000 at bootleg prices and possibly twice that sum, are missing. . There are some other facts, not in the records, which make an inquiry more than necessary. Outstanding is the repeated assertion of United States Marshal Linus Meredith that ho had never taken an inventory of the liquor when It was re- : ceived and that he did not know how many cases ; were in his custody. Tills assertion was made despite the fact that (he court records show a receipt by the marshal for the amount named by the attorney general. It is proper to inquire whether the denial of the marshal that he had made an inventory of the liquor was due to forgetfulness or whether it had a real motive, especially in view of the flat declaration by the Department of Justice that these thousands of dollars’ worth of liquor are now missing. What is to be said of the efficiency of Government if it fails to prevent the leak from its own custody of one-fourth of the liquor taken from a private violator of the law? The one purpose of the seizure of this liquor was to prevent it from getting into the hands of citizens who might and would use it in violation of the Volstead act. , It was taken from the distillery for the one purpose of preventing its being used as a beverage. On no other theory could a court enter an order that it be destroyed. The whole success of the Volstead act depends . upon this liquor siezed In this manner being de- ; stroyed and not drunk. But over and beyond this is the necessity for , inspiring confidence of citizens in the actions of officials. Especially should the believers in prohibition and in the ultimate success of the Volstead act be interested in seeing that no suspicion attach to any legal proceeding or act of any Government official in connection with the prosecution and enforcement of this law. Support for that law is likely to wane, if there be placed in the public mind any thought that through carelessness or worse, officials permit ille- . gal booze in their custody to be again circulated in illegal channels—and there is no legal channel for any liquor siezed by the Government to circulate. The disappearance of 330 cases of liquor from the custody of a Government official is much more serious than the disappearance of a like amount, illegally, from the distillery. The sale of liquor by the illicit maker is a blow only at the one law. The disappearance of such liquor from custody of the Government hits at confidence In all laws. . The people are entitled to know the facts about ' this matter. They are entitled to know exactly what means were taken to protect this booze from again getting back to the thirsty. They are entitled to know whether it was kept • in a manner which was reasonably safe. They are entitled to know whether it was possible for thieves to steal it from the Federal build- ! ing. <r> They are entitled to know why the same thieves showed such admirable restraint that having easily \taken the 330 cases they did not return for the rest. \ They are entitled to know why that leak was not disclosed or discovered until a member of Congress from a distant State made the open charge from the floor of Congress. They are entitled to know why denials were made that it was gone up to the hour that an out- ; side investigator made a check and the disappear--1 ance was thoroughly disclosed. They are entitled to know the truth of the . charge by former Prohibition Director Bert Morgan that two or three years ago an official report of the \ disappearance of a smaller amount was made and that no action was taken. They are entitled to know the reasons for the lack of action, for the secrecy, the evasiveness, the exploded denials, the conflicting statements by officials. They are entitled to know whether the Government is less interested in the disappearance of $50,000 worth of liquor from its own officers than it is in the sale of one drink of moonshine in a back alley—and why.

OUR CINDERELLAS When a rich, eccentric real man in New York married a 15-year-old girl, placed her in a magnificent home and made provisions for her future as far as money is concerned, a humane society gets busy to undo the act on the ground that it is cruelty to a child. Tho idea that a very young girl, not old enough for mature judgment, is hurried to the altar by one whose life has been mostly lived shocks our Western sense of propriety. We have campaigned, in large groups, against the child marriage customs of other countries, have turned with disgust from the practices of orientals who sell their daughters in the cradle or marry them in babyhood. Nationally wo have tried to make the marriage relation something more than a civil contract, to give it some sense of sacredness, although the protest against tjae marriage of this girl is based upon the legal theory that she la not old enough tn

ents are unfit to guard her Interests when they consent. We have recognized that the marriageable ago is largely a matter of latitude and that the girl of the tropics, who marries at ten, may be as physically lit for that relation at that tender age as the girl of 20 in a land that has winters. What should interest these very sincere people who are investigating this case, is not the fate of this one girl, but the conditions of society which make it a temptation for parents to turn over their immature daughters to the arms of ancient satyrs. They might even consider whether their energies might not be more profitably expended in saving the youth of thousands of young girls from being destroyed through long hours of labor in factories, as is done in the South, or behind the counters of basements, as is done in the very city this little girl becomes a Cinderella bride. 'The chief recommendation of this mature bußband was that he has money and provided the safeguards of marriage, instead of trying to purchase her youth in a less conventional mapner. Are her parents unusual and more heartless and cruel than the average father and mother without money? Would it be a temptation to many fathers and many mothers to prefer the wedding of their daughter to a millionaire as against the hazards of self support and privation and probable sacrifice for years? If they are unusual and cruel and conscienceless, then the one case makes little difference, for it means that the vast preponderance of parents will protect their daughters against any possible evil outcome and unhappiness as may be her fate. But if there be vast numbers of parents who would even hesitate about such a bargain, there is something really wrong that ought to be cured. Have we reached such a state of mind or of fear that many consider money the only path to happiness and it3 only security? Are we still so far away from the social millennium where every girl may look forward into being a Cinderella of her own making Instead of through the amorous purchase by some rheumatic prince? Is not the right to an affection and love that comes through mutual attraction, mutual tastes and common desire as inalienable as the right to liberty? Here is a matter and a question not for busybodies and self-ordained guardians but for those who have ideals and who really Jiink.

THE PITY OF IT “It isn’t very polite to speak slightingly of the Supreme Court, but I don’t feel obliged to employ any hypocritical phrases of reverence toward the court. I feel the thing humanly.” Again, “I don’t know that I can control my voice long enough to make you understand. Os course, I haven’t been using it much for over a year. . . . I have acquired a sense of futility of the whole proceeding." Gerald Chapman’s plea was wasted; he was hanged. But it must have been rather hard for that board of pardons to turn him down. Chapman didn't cringe, didn’t ask for mercy. Itather, he tried to reason with the board, pointing out what ho termed discrepancies in the proceedings that found him guilty, resorting to a scholarly discourse that would have done credit to a great lawyer. The whole thing must have been rather pitiful—a man in the shadow of the gallows scorning to get down on his knees and beg, striking this last blow in his defense as a sort of despairing, futile gesture. The supreme pity is that a man of Chapman’s undoubted intellect should not have turned his fine mind to an honest business.

FEBRUARY NEVER HOST TO GOOD FRIDAY formlrUoi^by* ton Bureau. 1333 New York Ave.. WaahinirtffPH) c in. ~ H e ? tH 1,1 for reply. McdiraT legal "amt ,y cottte& cLnot * anßw<?red - Alf Did Good Friday ever eoine in the month of February? No. Easter Sunday can not come earlier than March 22 or later than April 25; therefore, Good Friday must come either in March or April. On what day and date does the Speedway races take place? F. F. CHAFEE. Fo- the past few years the Speedway races in Indianapolis have taken place on Memorial day, May 30. Is William S. Hart now playing in the movies? Ho is back on the screen after an absence of two years. He has recently completed “Tumbleweeds,” a Western story. What is the meaning of the name McCann? It is an Irish name meaning “son of heroes?” How many times has the State of California been visited by earthquakes? The earliest recorded severe shock occurred in 1812, destroying mission buildings in Los Angeles and Santa Barbara counties and killing about forty persons. In 1851 San Francisco was considerably damaged; and there were other shocks in 1855, 1856, 1865 and 1918. On April 18, 1906, the State was visited by the worst earthquake in its history, extending over about 190 miles and centering in San Francisco. Os what is calomel made? It is found native as “horn quicksilver,” but is generally manufactured by triturating a mixture of mercuric sulphate, common salt, and metallic mercury, subliming and washing with boiling water. It is a white, heavy, odorless and tasteless pftwder that is almost insoluble in water. Will you please explain the work of the I’nited States budget bureau and how the receipts and expenditures of the United States are balanced? The bureau of the budget was created by the act approved June 10, 1921, and lias authority to assemble, correlate, revise, reduce or increase the estimates of th~ several departments and establishments of the Government. Heads of departments are required to appoint an officer whose duty it is to prepare departmental estimates of approriations and such supplemental or deficiency estimates as may he required. The accumulation of all these estimates makes possible the general Government estimates of receipts and expenditurqudfekeumpose tho national budget. In 1925 were S-3.780.148.654 and expemli- ,> '.VAT* ■ 4 *• 1 ' ' ,r 1? - >s 11 is estimated that

-ljjLE IAUiAAAI'OLIiS TJAILo

Robinson and Fields Turn Out a New Song of Sympathy About An Old Street Singer

pathy is again coming to *he front. Must rely In this case upon the sssmmilllMll till, mil tin ii In popular D. e Co-

By Walter D. Hickman There seems to boa little twist in the public taste in music these days. Tlie ballad and the song of sympathy is again coming to the front. Proof of this is the success of the sentimental ‘‘The Prisoner's Song.” J. Russell Robinson, song writer of this city, who is now on tour over the Orpheum circuit with Marion Harris, and Arthur Fields have recognized this now turn in popular taste. Robinson and Fields have just published through Leo Feist, Inc., anew song of sympathy called “The Street Singer.” Robinson wrote the music and Fields the words. It is a dramatic little thing with a broad dramatic musical background which gets into the heart. Robinson at my request has given me the words of “The Street Singer,” which tells a complete story as follows: I Outtuiie of my window I hrird a voice Sir.* a son* of (he lone .I*o. I could tell by hia tone he had seen hotter days. So his story I wanted to know. Ho Mid. “1 eiuie in op ra while- she' stayed at home. Tho one only love of my ltfcl But somebotb stole hrr—-hr n ft m- a'otic. Tho woman whom I made my wile. —Chorus—row I m only a ginger, who aims on the street: My "olee is all tired and torn. Not lone a*o it was mellow and sweet. But now its all husky and worr. It seems but a day I hoard millions applaud; ‘Twas then I was in mv prime. Now I ni only a singer who wngs on the street For a penny, a nickel or dime. . „ II 'One night in Taeliaoci' I played the clown: 'Twds a part that I loved eo well And the public acclaimed me and made me a star: Home the good news I hurried to tell. As 1 entered a note on tho table I found: ‘l've gone with the one I a-lorv. For you've had your choice of a wife or career.’ , I fainted and feU to tho floor. 11l “This tragedy stunned me: my voico was gone; I was burning with jealous rage. With a vengraj’cc 1 bought tin m all over tho land. And I gave up the opera stage. I’ve tx-on told that he loft her. but I’ll take her back; I’ve l-:,med what it means to reerrt. 11l sing in the street with a hope in my heart She'll hear me. come bank and forget." New Foreign Records With the present Russian art invasion of this country and the tours of the big opera companies to cities

RIGHT HERE

IN INDIANA

THE FAMILY BATHROOM Construction of a $250,000 apartment house on N. Meridian St., has been halted until Superior Court can decide whether the bathrooms in the new building should be provided with ventilators or windows. The new city building code requires ventilators. The State housing law specifies windows. The apartment house builder's comply with the State law, but ignore the city code. Hence the question will be given a court scrubbing. Probably the small boy, who views Saturday night and his weekly ablutions with proper loathing, feels that any argument on bathroom construction is absurd. Why build 'em at all, he asks. But doubtless public health, life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness of the Indianapolis citizenry is involved in the question of ventilators vs. windows. The controversy reveals how complicated, minute and uncertain our building restrictions have become. Last year the city adopted anew building code, covering hundreds of pages. City officials and builders, plumbers and contractors are still trying to find out what it is all about. And a contractor, to insure complying with all its requirements must have a bevy of lawyers at his elbow. And yet apparently the authors of this detailed code, in framing the measure, never thought to look up the State law and make their monumental measure conform to the State act. Perhaps all the provisions of the building code are necessary to protect the public from shoddy construction, to reduce fire hazards and to safeguard public health. But it’s going to be hard to build a city of a million population with a building code that makes construction work a cross-word puzzle.

HOOFBEATS GROW FAINTER The horse population of Indiana has decreased 20 per cent in the last five years, according to report of the United States Department of Agriculture. In 1920 there ■were 717,000 horses in the State, in 1925, only 527,000. Throughout the country there is a similar decrease. Apparently dobbin is vanishing. He is being supplanted by gasoline-drinking mechanical creatures with cast iron brains. But, though hoofbeats are growing fainter, they still accompany the march of civilization. It is from city life that the horse has most completely disappeared. In Marion County the horse population has fallen from 2,648 to 1,600 in the hist three years. Noj longer does the spanking team, draw the open-faced bnlfouche of this merchant prince. Ami lesser urbat citizen go forth in pjrt paid autotaobiles instead of bar fcuggies of yore. In

in this country there has been u revival in foreign records. I have been asked in this depart ment to list some of these new records. Must rely in this case upon the releases of Odeon, as follows: Dolce Speme. (Swcctness-VValtz), Orchestra Italian*, inatrumental. Sempre Brio. I-olka (Always Gay-Polka). Or-he-tra Xtjitana. instrumental. Trite > M arena re, Cav. G. D. Vita, tenure. Neapolitan tenor. Ti Vogiio Tutta, Cav. G. De Vita, tenore. Neapolitan tenor. Nofrio Aceuzato. G. De Kosalia e Cos comic. _ Nofrio Portalettere, G. De Rosalia e Cos comic. Amorina, Valzer (Little Love-Waltz). Scstcttj Modcruo. instrumental. Rosa, Mazurka, bestetto Moderno. Instrumental. Charlotte Walzer. Kapelle Peuppus. Peasant Band. Konig Karl Marsch. Kapelle Peuppus. Peasant Band. Madel. tela bin dir eo gut. Rudolf Zanlt. tenor. Mein Madel. mein Madel von Neckcr•trand. Rudolf Za.nk. tenor. leh tan/, nur Polka gem (a. and. Operetta “Riquette'’T. Odeon Orchcster mil Refraingesang hand with chorus. Mulsi. Put*! Foxtrot. Odeon Oreheetcr mit Rrfraingcsaiig. band with chorus. Herzensfreudeit Landler. Kapelle Jala, Peasant Band. A!pen-Landler. Dachauer Ilaucmkapcllc. Pi a-.int Band. stare przyslowia. Wojtek i Magda, komIczny duet, comic. Szemus oezka zaplakala? Wojtek 1 Magda, komicxiiy duct, comte. Poil D.achem. Oherek. J. Dombrowski orkivstralny trio, instrumental. Nastka Polka. J. Dombrowtkl orkiestratny trio, instrumental. Ik-ezd ciepinainl. Rhcinlandor. Orklcstr.a Narodowa. band _ Jak emarowany, Rheaniander. Orkiestra Narodowa. band. Hora Jianca. Joe. Cantat de orchestra Nationals din Sihlu. clain-c orchestra Ilnra Arcvsanca. .100. Cantat de orchcatra Nation,ila din Sibiu. dance orohestra. Horn Miiresan-a. To.-. Cantat de orchestra Nations’* din Sibiu. dance oreh—tric rlora Sibiam-a. Cantat de orchestra Nationals din Sibiu. dance orchestra. Todo por ti. Tango Vocal. Fortunio Bonanova. .... _ _ Nubea de hurao. Tango Milonga. Fortunir Bonanova. _ .. . Rurnos Aire*. Tango Vocal. Juan Pu'ido. So'o de Baritono. La Provincirna. Tango Vocal. Juan Pulido Solo de Tbiritono. Gabeguit*. Tango Vocal. Fortunio Bonanova. .. , Ra un golfo. Tango Vocal. Fortunio Bonanova. .. Sombrsa. Tango Vocal. Juan Pulido. Solo de Baritono. . . _ .., El Huerfano. Tanro VoeaJ. Juan Pulido, Solo do Baritono. • • • Indianapolis theaters today offer: "Tho P.ig Parade.” at English's: “Red Dice.” at the Colonial: “The Crown of Lies.” at the Ohio; the DuPonts, at Keith’s: “Tramp, Tramp. Tramp," at the Circle: Russian Master Singers, at the Lyric; “The Little Cottage," at the Palace: “For Heaven’s Sake,” at the Apollo; burlesque. at the Broadway, and “The Transcontinental Limited,” at the Isis.

By GAYLORD NELSON

But on the farm the horse is still useful. He performs many agricultural tasks more cheaply and efficiently than mechanical thtng-a-ma-jigs without brains. On the bridle path he Is still indispensable for the proper setting for a smart riding habit. Perhaps he will eventually be retired to the museum. We hope not. Men and horses hav® thundered down the ages together. And If the horse is eradicated what will the Prince of Wales do? He will have to get married to get his picture In the papers. Probably he doesn’t favor the immediate extinction of the horse. THE DRAGON’S TEETH Federal prohibition agents swooped down on a newly opened roadhouse on the outskirts of Vincennes Sunday night- Sixty quarts of home brew, two gallons of lightning, four slot machines and fourteen more or less Inebriated customers were confiscated. Just a routine raid, and a routine haul, staged without any preliminary flourish, and unaccompanied by war correspondents and red fire. However, only a few weeks ago a covey of Federal dry agents staged a spectacular clean-up of Vincennes, slew dozens of blind tigers and arrested scores of bootleggers and dry law violators. At the conclusion of the festivities, Vincennes was ostensibly as dry as a cracked lip. But the arid condition was fleeting. Hardly had the dry agents disappeared over the horizon before new blind tigers opened, new bootleggers vended their moist and fiery wares. So it goes in other Hoosier communities. In recent months Evansville, Anderson and Indianapolis have been vacuum cleaned by spectacular activity of Federal raiders. Despite which there has been no diminution in the usual grist of drunks and booze peddlers picked up day by day by local officers. Os all the activities dry enforcement officers, intensive and sporadic drives against one-gallon blind tigers and half-pint thirsts yield the least results. It’s like slaying a dragon and sowing his teeth to grow up into new dragons as soon aa the officer’s back is turned. We won’t make any real progress toward drying up Indiana or the country, until the wholesale diversion of industrial alcohol and the big sources of supply are plugged> The liquor problem is wholesale, not retail. MARY AND HER LAMB Mary and her little lamb whose fleece was white as snow are to have a stone monument erected in their honor at Newport, N. H. It was in that town, residents declare after exhaustive research, that the author of the famous poem was born and there stands the schoolhouse where the episode narrated in th„ versaK

Some real melody is being furnished this iv*k at tho I,yrio, by Nellie Jay and Iter Jay Birds. The picture sliows 4he artist grouped around Miss Jay end a grand piano.

and her lamb in atone or bronze, with fitting ccremcaiy. They deserve it. Why not in Indiana erect monuments honorinft "Orphaut Annie.” “An Old Svwectheart of Aline,” "Penrod,” “Tho Sultan of Su'.u’’ and other famous characters of lloosier origin. Most of us are tired of the usual type of memorial art, the statues that we have erected in our parks and courthouse squares. Every Horsier town has some horrible example of tlie cast iron hitching post school of sculpture. Usually it's it, bronze statue to some defunct eminent citizen, a long-for-gotten Lieutenant Governor or near sttalesman. Almost Invariably the eminent citizen is portrayed in a badly wrinkled, &I fitting frock coat and his pants lopk as if he had slept in them. Such statues may be memorials, but they are not art. Recently there has been a revolt against snch memorials. A North Carolina man has erected a statue to Eve. Ajid up in Wisconsin. in the home of his creator, Andy Gump Is Immortalized in stone. Now comes Mary and her lamb. May the movement spread. Andy Gump and Mary's lamb have contributed more to the joys of existence, have been greater factors in the lives of plain people than most of the near statesmen and warriors whose statues clutter American landscapes.

Only 9 More Days! REMOVAL SALE! Final Prices Given Everything! A Few Examples of the Hundreds of Bargains Available THURSDAY! $2.98 FIBRE FERN BASKETS, Just Four, Choice •fyß WILLOW CLOTHES BASKETS, Large Sixe, Just It, Choice ....... C w BABY BLANKETS, White, Extra Heavy Quality, Sizes 30x4p Inches. Just 15. Choice Jr ETCHED GLASS WATER GLASSES, set of six for 69c KITCHEN TABLES, natural wood top, 24x36 inches, just 7, choice $2.69 $366 LIVING ROOM SUITE, 90-inch davenport, with spring arms, and FIRESIDE chair, Jacquard upholstering $lB3 $49.50 FULL SIZE BED, mahogany veneers, antique finish $24.75 $199 QUEEN ANNE DINING SUITE, walnut veneers $98.50 $52.50 and $49.50 AXMINSTER RUGS, 9x12 feet and 8y 4 xloi/ 2 feet $37.95 $31.50 BRUSSELS RUGS, 9x12 feet and feet. Choice. .$19.75 $69.50 HEAVY AXMINSTERS, extra size, 11*4x12 feet and 9x15 feet $58.95 ARMSTRONG’S BEST PRINTED LINOLEUM, 6 and 12foot widths, square yard 98c $23 MAHOGANY finish DAVENPORT TABLES at */ 2 price $11.50 s6l COLONIAL STYLE BOOKCASES, mahogany veneers $45.75 $lB 5-piece BREAKFAST SUITE, unfinished, now $12.85 $55 LAUREL GAS RANGES on sale for $39.85 *** West Market Street-Opposite Interurban Station We Move in 9 Days to 37-39-41 S. Meridian St.

THE VERY IDEA ■ ■ —By Hal Cochran

PHOTOGRAPHS Why is it folk are fussed ta death, when having pictures taken? What makes ya kinda catch yer breath? Has self-control forsaken? Ya stand before the camera and there’s no real thought of fear. And yet you ne'er can understand just why ya feel so queer. You're togged out in the best, you’ve got. and oughta feel real fit, but when you're posin’, like as not, it's that way—not a bit! The camera man suggests a stylo of view ta make ya proud, and when ya try to slightly smile—ya want to laugh out loud. The photographs are taken and they’re ready in a week. And all

MR. FIXIT Citizens Cannot Get to Garages Because of Muddy Alley.

Let Mr. Fixit present your cage to city officials. He is The Times representative at the ctiy hall. Write barn at The Times. Only the allotment of additional funds to the streets superintendent's department will hasten repair of the streets and alleys concerning which Mr. Fixit has received hundreds of complaints. i\ir. Fixit will submit the complaints, but asks the patience of readers until action takes place. The fault is not with the city employes; it’s a case of finances. DEAR MR. FIXIT: It is against the law to park cars in the streets at night. But what are we to do? We can’t get to our garages. The alley is so muddy we stick there if we put our cars away. lam sending this for all those who have to use this alley. This alley is on Twen-ty-Eighth St., between Chester and School StH., on the south side of Twenty-Eighth St. BSIGHTWOOD CITIZEN. Mr. Fixit sympathizes with you in your predicament. The repairs will proceed as soon as possible, ho is assured. However, take advantage of the fact the law allows you to park your car twelve hours on a street outside the downtown district, poovided the lights are burning at; night. Work will proceed on the following complaints as soon as possible: R. Ltedig. 709 E. Southern Ave.: Ethel B’ushong, 1106 E. Georgia St.; A IVoperty Owner, alley at rear of 10|0 S. Keystone Ave.: William J. Cfcirk, 6188 Broadway; V. A. A . alley east of State Ave., between Hoyt and Lexington Aves, DEAR MR. FIXIT: Will you see that the dead dop: that has been in the alley in the roar of 1540 W. Vermont St. for two months is removed? Police have been bold several times. J. R. B. You will have relief at once, was the promise .Mr. Fixit received.

.zU/lijUL 14, Ac-G

that time you're achin’ fer tho proofs—to get a peek. At last, when they’re submitted —it’s a strange thing, still it’s true: Tho best one is a dandy—but it doesn't look like you. • * • Mrs. Lulu Jobes, psychologist, says money makes people honest. Now, if someone will just tell us how to get the money. • • • It’s odd what a lot of work, seeds and patience it takes to grow a garden full of weeds. • • * The inexpensive spring bonnet always looks best —to father. * * * When women by things 0. O. D. The outcome’s really sad. For e'er the collectors call on her, She lias to call oil dad. • • * People spend fifty weeks of the year looking forward to two weeks vacation—and those two weeks looking forward to getting homo to rest up. • * e Now that wo have autos, we don’t need wars to keep the world from being over-populated. • * • Some people can’t understand tho handwriting on the wall because the baby just scribbles. * * * FABLES IN FACT ONCE THERE WAS A WIFE WHO SPENT MOST OF HER EVENINGS READING PERIOD FINALLY HER HUSBAND COMPLAINED ABOUT IT COMMA AND SAID COMMA QUOTATION MARK GEE COMMA YOU NEVER PAY ANY ATTENTION TO ME AT ALL PERIOD A LWAYS READING COMMA READING COMMA READING PERIOD WHY DON’T YOU TURN OVER A NEW LEAF QUESTION MARK QUOTATION MARK SO COMMA SHE DID DASH DASH AND WENT ON READING FROM THE NEXT PAGE PERIOD Coovriaht. 19/tS. NEA Servlet

HEALTH DAY IS MAY 1 Counties to Join In Obserr nee for Children. The Indiana Tuberculosis Association today called on ninety-two county associations throughout Indiana to join in the observance of Child Health Day on May 1. The tuberculosis association called attention to the fact that the child hygiene division of the State board of health who is officially sponsoring Child Health Day in Indiana, will assist counties in planning the celebration of Child Health Day. May 1 has been set aside by the American Child Health Association and the United States Children's BureaiJ as Child Health Day, and the week following will be observed in many places in the country as National Child Health Week.