Indianapolis Times, Volume 37, Number 289, Indianapolis, Marion County, 5 April 1926 — Page 4
PAGE 4
The Indianapolis Times EOT W. HOWARD, President. BOTD GURLEY, Editor. ' WM. A. MAYBORN, Btis. Mgr. Member of the Scripps-Howard Newspaper Alliance * * * Client of the United Press and the NEA Service * * * Member of the Audit Bureau of Circulations. ■Published dailv except Sunday by Indianapolis Times Publishing Cos., 214-220 W. Maryland St., Indianapolis * * * Subscription Rates: Indianapolis—Ten Cents a Week. Elsewhere —Twelve Cents a Week • * * PHONE— MA in 3500.
No law shall be passed restraining the free interchange of thought and opinion, or re stricting the right to speak, write, or print freely, on any subject whatever—Constitution ol Indiana.
Jim Gets Started In the spirit of fairness let It be recorded that after thirty years of public life, one of the laws of the Nation will stand as a monument to Senator James Watson. Never again can it be said that he has never written a law or fathered one which bears his name. It is true that the law which he introduced is already in effect in many cities and that councilmen who fathered ordinances for the same purpose are unsung, forgotten, unhonored. It will protect the lives of many children, says the great statesman, because it provides that any cleaning preparations which contain lye or caustic ingredients shall be plainly stamped with the warning of "poison.’' No longer will the mail order houses be permitted to send out their cans and barrels to menace the children of the Nation. The law has the merit of unanimous approval inasmuch as those who manufacture or deal in these articles are very much Interested in preventing anj tragedies and the bad advertising that always results. But it shows initiative, even if his start is made against something that every one agrees is bad. In another thirty years perhaps Watson may have the couarge to champion a measure which has in it an element of opposition, some cause or principle about which there is a chance of disagreement. It is conceivable, though not probable that in that time he might get to the point where he would challenge the extortions of big privileged interests. He might, in time, emerge from the cloakroom with a bill to give the farmers a little more than a "bag of peanuts" or show enough interest in the workers to' relieve them of some of the unfair burdens which they carry. True, the people have long awaited for the miracle, the product of great genius, the bud which shows that the winter of gestation is over and that the spring time of Watson’s career is at hand. It is possible that he is about to bloom, somewhat after the manner of a century plant it is true, but still a little flower of promise and a sign of hope. The people of the State have been very patient. They have waited long and anxiously. The encouchment is over. Watson is the father of a law.
Politics and Principles One of the organizers of the prohibition party in Indiana died last week at the ripe age of 84. Hi3 passing may serve to call attention to the history which lies behind the passage of the Eighteenth amendment to the Constitution, and points to the fact that the triumph of principles and of the political parties which produce them are not neces sarily linked. When the prohibition party was formed a few zealous and very sincere people who gave it their support firmly believed that only by the triumph of their own party could they possibly attain their objective. Two large and dominant political parties laughed at this new r babe of politics. In their own vicinity the men who voted for this ticket, were looked upon as very foolish. Wise men and the more practical said that they were wasting their votes. The party was considered harmless and certainly not regarded as at all dangerous. The arrogance jof the saloon interests and the very potent evils that came from over-indulgence convinced large numbers that the drink evil must be curbed, and by a slow gradual process of political strategy and intense propaganda, the movement came when the cause for which these very pioneers sacrificed became the fundamental part of our law. No prohibitioners had any part in the final triiftnph nor was that party given any credit for any of its early triumph. None of these men who acted upon chance and were willing to sacrfice for a principle were even honored or remembered. Whatever credit was distributed went to those strategists who were not so foolish as to waste their votes. Only when one passed to their final reward was it ever remembered that in his early youth he gave enthusiasm and ardor to a cause. It may also be recalled that in the later history of the prohibition party its leaders and its members suffered more from criticism by those -who finally obtained legal prohibition than they had ever suffered from those who made and sold whisky. Less than twenty-five years ago they were accused of really blocking temperance by insisting upon prohibition instead of throwing their support to local option as against the saloon. They were accused of being fanatics and impractical. Perhaps that is the real glory of those men who formed this third political party. They did not expect to win, but they forged on. Fear of defeat did sot daunt them, neither derision nor repeated failures cooled their ardor. They believed in a principle and they stood upon principle. Such men must ever have respect. This Nation could well use many of this sort. It needs those who believe in something. We have become too sadly practical, too politically wise, too indifferent to fundamental things. Whatever you may think about prohibition you cannot refrain from giving unstinted respect to that little group whose bravery and persistence forms one of the bright pages of our political history.
Broadcasting, Not Wisely, But Too Well When Paul Klugh took the air the other night he started something that may have Important consequences. Klugh is chairman of the Radio Broadcasters Association and, as such, is in excellent position to use the air. He made use of his opportunity too well, many members of Congress now think, when he broadcast his views on proposed legislation concerning the rights of music writers. The music writers and the broadcasters are at war. Klugh had stations all the way from the Atlantic coast to the Mississippi River hooked up while he told his views on the subject, Then he went farther and told his myriad audi-
ence to write or wire their Senators and Congressmen. Picking out one section at a time, he told the listeners therein the names of the Senators and Congressmen to whom they should write or wire. It was a cleverly conceived effort and it worked. Klugh apparently is a convincing talker. Congressmen began to receive telegrams and letters in heretofore unheard of quantities. One Ohio Congressman, named by Klugh in his speech, says he received 1,800 such messages in one day. Now Congressmen Hke to hear from home, but they don’t relish carloads of advice based on one-sided representations. And the present outpouring comes at a time when a good deal of thought is being given to the question of regulating the radio. Some regulation of radio propaganda is certain to result. Limits are likely to be fixed, and should be, to tha. use of radio for such purposes by those controlling the industry. Klugh’s enterprise demonstrates a dangerous condition. It is as if a private concern owned the postoffice and decided to swamp the public with propaganda designed to help it obtain some special concession from Congress—while at the same time withholding the use of the mails from any person who wished to warn the public against the proposal. Another such effort or two on the part of the broadcasters’ association may result in a sudden revival of the idea that perhaps, after all, the radio should be owned and controlled by the public. Who remembers away back yonder when Babe Ruth was a baseball player and Jack Dempsey a pugilist? A drink was once considered good for a cold. Now a cold is considered good for a drink. One thing about short skirts is you might as well take a girl out riding as in swimming. What’s worse than getting arrested for speeding when you aro trying to get to church on time? Spring brings the urge to hit the open road — which you usually find closed for repairs. Take care of your teeth. Brush them daily and never ball a man who can whip you a liar. A good dance orchestra costs almost as much for the evening as the rouge, listerine and liniment. the very simple spring hats bring top prices. Maybe if there were about ten days in a week we could rest up between Sundays. Spring is when the closed car owner quits bragging and the open car owner starts bragging.
Sun Is Responsible for Moon Shine You can tret an answer to any question of fact or information by .writintr to The Tnaianapolis Times Washington Bureau. 1322 New York Ave.. Washlnsrton. D. C., Inclosing: 2 cents in stamps for reply. Medical, ’egal and marital advice cannot be riven nor can'extended research be undertaken. A!i other questions will receive a personal reply. Unsigned requests cannot be answered. All letters are confidential.— Editor. Docs the moon radiate its own light? .. The moon is illuminated by the rays of the sun; it is a dead world and has no luminous quality of its own. flow many persons are employed in the United States postal service? Approximately 358,000. Why is the election of President Hayes railed ihe disputed election?. The Hayes election occurred In 1876 when four States each reported two sets of electors. The question arose as to which certificates were to be recognized. The Democratic nominees, Tilden and Hendricks, had indisputably received 184 votes, one less than a majority. The votes of South Carolina, Florida and Louisiana, and one vote from Oregon, being twenty in all, were In doubt, owing to the rejection by the returning boards of votes alleged to be fraudulent in the three States named first. To settle the matter an elecoral commission was created. It decided in favor of the Republican, Hayes, and as only the concurrent votes of both Houses could overthrow the result, its decision stood, the Republican Senate voting to sustain, the Democratic House to reject. One elector in each of five States was objected to as ineligible qn account of being a Federal officeholder, but both Houses consented to admit those votes. 0\ Were there more death by drowning than by fire in the United States in 1924? The figures given out by the Census Office for the registration area are 7,304 deaths by fire and 6,529 by drowning. How many acres will one bushel of corn plant? From five to seven acres, depending upon the soil. From 8 to 11 pounds of corn is required for an acre. How can one distinguish a yellow poplar tree? The yellow poplar is really not a poplar at all, but a member of the magnolia family. The way to distinguish the tree when it Is not in leaf is by the wood. The wood of the so-called yellow poplar is yellowish olive, while other poplars and willows are grayish brown. A better way to distinguish is by breaking off a twig and smelling it, . It has a pungent odor not found in other poplars. Is there a bill pending in Congress to change the immigration laws to permit, the wives and husbands of immigrants in this country to come in as non-quota immigrants? The Wadsworth-Perlman bill, now pending In Congress, provides for the admission as non-quota immigrants, of the wives, husbands and unmarried minor children of those who have declared their intention to become American citizens. The bill also exempts from the quota all veterans of the American forces who served in the World War arid who after being honorably discharged remained in Europe; instead of returning directly to the Unled States. This applies to all alien veterans of the American forces who served in the World War, no matter where they were bom. Where is the "Klondike”? It is a region in the Canadian territory of Yukon, lying chiefly to the east of the Yukon River, where Klondike Creek flows into it, near the middle of the Alaskan boundary line. The mining district includes the basins of the Klondike, Indian and McQuestion rivers, and is about 800 square miles in area. It was on Bonanza Creek, a tributary of the Klondike, that a prospecting miner, G. W. Cormack, discovered rich gold deposits, Aug. 16, 1896. The following year saw an almost unprecedented rush of gold miners, and the Klondike was converted from a barren waste to a populous lively mining district. Who is the world’s heavyweight wrestling champion? The title at present is in dispute, being claimed by both Joe Stecher of Omaha and Ett (Strangler) Lewis'of Kentucky." * ' /’
THE INDIANAPOLIS TIMES
‘Big Parade’ Is Most Human Movie Ever Reflected Upon an Indianapolis Screen
It W’alter I>. Hickman The boys over there sang songs about a farmer having a daughter fair. They sang and yelled Parley Voo and made it rhyme with B. V. D. They loved, they laughed, they cried, they screamed, they died ar 1
lived. In other words these are the various human emotions reflected in "The Big Parade," the most human movie ever reflected upon any screen. Some may say that.it Is the greatest photoplay ever reflected upon the screen. I will not argue that point. If it is not the greatest, then it is only a half degree behind the greatest. It is my humble opinion that there are now
N
John Gilbert
only two candidates for the title of the world’s greatest mode —"The Birth of a Nation" —or "The Big Parade.” The “parade’’ shows war In its most human, lovin’ aspects. It shows war as a cursing nasty, terrible thing. It shows the heartbeats, the laughs, the screams and giggles behind the lines. It shows war as it is In the front line trenches. It shows death, hate, real human, terrible hate. It shows sudden death. It reflects hell on earth. The war reflected here is the real article. It is not the melodramatic war so often reflected upon the stage and the screen.“but war as it is with all of its horror, filth and pain. And yet “The Big Parade” Is not a photoplay of just horrors. The story Is so human because real characters appear In It. Real men and real women. Let us consider this movie in two ways. First, its comedy. Most men attach as much importance to the dramatic war side of this movie, because even the war scenes are human —human because real men went mad with killin’. , It is in the first part of the movie when you see the boys marchin’ and singing. Where you see ’em in France dishing barnyard dust just for pastime. Then you see ’em pickin’ out the girls and the development of the romances. It Is here that James Apperson and Melisande become friends and real lovers. Their love-making is so human and real that one cannot understand that It Is just acting. The Influence of their love even extends into the trenches and over the shell ruined lands of of France. Here is a romance so human and beautiful that It becomes a sort of benediction. It is here In the first part that you meet James Apperson, played by John Gilbert; Bull, played by Ton: O’Brieh, arid Slim, plhyed by Karl Dane. Dane is the real comedy find of the season. He Is as slim and long as his name Implies. Ho is the best tobacco chewer in the Army and is the champion spitter. He is a real he-man. He is rough, honest and ready. And when he dies on the battlefield I am sure that you will feel that you have lost a real friend. John Gilbert is starred in “The Big Parade," and Justly so. Last summer when I was In New York I was told by some film people who know what they are talking about that Gilbert is the best movie bet for the next ten years. Everytime you mention “The Big Parade," you will be reminded of Gilbert, and when you think of John Gilbert you will instantly recall “The Big Parade.” Here is great big human acting. It is more than acting, it Is a genius reflecting life in its various forms of emotion. I can say the same of Renee Adoree. the French girl. Here is powerful work, beautiful in tender moments of love and powerful when she rises to supreme dramatic neights. Here Is a picture for every Amer'can. Here is a picture that will live ir. your memory for years. The musical score has been so worked out and presented so that it becomes a vital part of the entertainment. ■‘The Big Parade” is a movie which should be seen by every man, woman and child In this country. At English’s, matinee and night dally, for the rest of the week.
LLOYD strikes anew NOTE IN HIS NEW COMEDY Have always maintained that the day would come when Harold Lloyd and Charlie Chaplin would lead the comedy field on the screen. Lloyd knows that movie folk desire to see him do many stunts and he is wise enough to know that he must have a vehicle of sufficient strength to permit these stunts. I think you will find In "For Heaven’s Sake,” Lloyd's new comedy, anew note. A complete story is told that of a rich man who throws away his money as if it were water. He certainly is a red hot spending hound. He tears up two perfectly good automobiles in the first few hundred feet of the film. He showers money here and there, some of it falling in the hands of an old man, honest but poor, who desires to establish a mission for those who need both religion and work. Our money-spending hero discovers that the mission worker has a beautiful daughter. Then Lloyd / helps the mission to get a crowd by chasing in a bunch of crooks and others. This is a mighty funny scene as done by Lloyd. The old chase scene is used to marvelous advantage. It certainly gets the laughs. Then our hero falls madly in love with the daughter of the mission worker. His rich friends kidnap him a few minutes before the wedding. Then the fun starts. The reception committee, composed of bowery toughs acquire “buns” and go on a great and merry spree. Lloyd escapes from his captors and acts as guardian and nurse to the souses. Here is where we get the big fun scenes by about six men and a great motor bus. These stunts as done by the men are as hair: raising as they are funny.*
"For Heaven's Sake” is built upon different lines from anything that the comedian has done before. Os course it is Lloyd who is responsible for the fun and yet his supporting cast is about as funny. The movie gets its title from the &,ct that Lloyd is doing something 1 for “heaven,” meaning the mission. It is probably more farce than comedy and yet when the picture is all over you will remember It as an entire entertainment Instead of Just a few scenes In which Lloyd generally lifts a picture to high entertaining planes. And Lloyd Is wise In bringing a new note to the screen. He believes that he must have vehicles which tell an entire story. He is light in that. "For Heaven's Sake” approaches a stage comedy or farce much nearer than his previous pictures. I believe that Lloyd has established anew idea in movie comedies in making "For Heaven’s Sake.” It Is mighty good, in fact, corking good all round entertainment. I know I will be asked if this movie is as good as "The Freshman.” I believe It Is better in some Instances but the theme of "The Freshman” had that human boob element which people so much enjoy. In "For Heaven's Sake,” Lloyd scatters his talents along over a complete story which has a real climax and a logical ending. The bill includes a comedy, "Raisin’ Cain,’’ a news reel. Henderson and Weber, and, Emil Seidel and his orchestra. At the Apollo all week. -I- -I- + ‘KIKP IS JUST AS FAMOUS ON THE STAGE These cute little devils like Klkl have been popular on the stage for years. Such creatures must not be too naughty—a sort of unspoiled bad child. Such a dame Is Kikl who could live with much purity in the bach-
elor apartment of the good looking and wlao and wealthy Renal, a very wl.se man indeed when women are concerned. Lenora Ulrlo created Klkl on the stage and for several seasons this naughty but pure at heart child flourished. So It seems to pay In the story books to bo bad good. Norma Talmadge, using the regulation dress of Klkl,
u
Norma Talmadge
which Ulric used, lias brought Klkl to the screen. It Is a whale of a comedy role. It is a laughing role, the sort of stuff which most people enjoy la the good and funny part qt the chairacter is developed Instead of the bad. Norma Talmadge la remembered for some mighty flue dramatic work on the screen and now she has earned the right to be considered one of the most charming funmakers upon the screen today. She follows somewhat along the character lines used by Miss Ulric. In other words we are having the sort of Klkl on the screen that we had on the stage. "Klkl,” to be a success, must have a smart cast and an elaborate production. Type characters must be used. Tills we have In the First National production of this stage hit. The splendid comedy work of Miss Talmadge proves to me that xve have a right to expect as great acting on the screen as on the stage. I am sure that Miss Ulric could not have done better with the part. • Although It is Norma they will be talking about, yet remember that “Kikl” Is nearly actor proof, as it has some mighty ’’fat” roles. Next to Miss Talmadge, Ronald Colman registers comedy greatness. Colman is developing rapidly. He gives a smooth and convincing performance. He Is magnificent In the scene where "Klkl" puts on the sleep gag. The cast Is so good I will give It to you in full: Kikl Norma TBlmadeo Itcnal Ronald Colman Paulette Gertrude Astor Raron Rapp Marc MaoDcrmott Adolphe Georxo K. Arthur Brule William Orlamond Joly Erwin Connelly Pierre Frankie Darro Pastryraan Mack Swain A real novelty this week is the way that Bakaleinlkoff is presenting a song cartoon, “Daisy Bell.” Here Is some delicious musical fun, well done. The overture is "Phedre.” Bill includes "Ectotypes,” a novelty film. At the Circle all week. * * • COLONIAL CELEBRATES ELEVENTH BIRTHDAY Birthday parties always are Interesting, and especially so If it Is a theater. Os course, you know that theaters have birthdays, Just like people. This week Bingham and Cohen are celebrating the eleventh anniversary
of the opening of the Colonial Theater. They are presenting Reginald Denny ar.d Laura La Plante In one of those intimate little comedies called "Skinner's Dress Suit.” As in all good little domestic comedies of married life there Is a lesson. And the lesson seems to be —you are never down and out unless your clothes tell the world that you are down and really out. Denny
Mi
Reginald Denny
is cast as a good meaning cashier in a big business concern. He is all right, but slow going. His wife tells him to strike the boss for a raise. Finally he does, but he gets the boss in a wrong mood, and out goes Denny. He then tries to bluff his wife into believing that he received a raise in salary instead of getting the “can.” Then the fun. starts,. IJenny puts on his dress suit and ritzes the
Movie Verdict A P O L L O—Harold Lloyd strikes anew comedy note in “For Heaven's Sake.” It proves that a comedian can produce a complete story as a comedy. There Is a plot here. COLONIAL— Mighty polite fun is found in "Skinner's Dress Suit.” ENGLISH'S—"The Big Parade’’ is one of the best movies ever made and there will be many say that it is the best of them all. OHlO—"Morals for Men,” just another movie along the old lines. CIRCLE—"KIkI” is a whale of a success with Norma Talmadge In the name part, Delicious fun. Not to be missed.
world to the tune of a cold million. Here is some nice and polite fun, well done. Denny is coming right ahead on this dress suit comedy stuff. Beginning tonight and ending on Thursday, the Colonial will present harmonica bests. Everybody seems to be turning musician these days. If you play the harmonica and want to tell the world about it, then enter these contests. The bill includes music by the American Harmonists; Julia Niebergall in pianologues, a news reel and an Aesop Fables. At the Colonial all week. -I- -I- -ITHE SCREEN BECOMES VERY, VERY MORAL There seems to be a tendency on the part of some producers to overdo the moral teaching thing. Entertainment must be entertainment and not a sermon. Many times entertainment is really a moral sermon, but It Is done so cleverly that no one suspects that it Is a lesson. While seeing "Morals for Men,” yesterday, I had the suspicion that
there was very little story to it, but a whole lot of morals. It Is a plea that men and women should be Judged by the same standard of morals. When we first meet Tearle In "Morals for Men,” the character ho Is playing is living in a bad way with a woman. He doe*n’t work but promises 'to try and get work tomorrow. So he strolls down to
Conway Tcarlo
the ocean one day Rnd rescues a rich girl who fell from a yacht, when she should have been having a drink. This results In a romance and wedding. Marriage, of course, after our heroe’s first woman had left him and had landed on the straight and narrow. And being so successful, the first woman marries a regular rotter of a fnan for a husband. Os course our heroe's path and the straight path of the woman again meet and the result Is that the society wife becomes suspicious. There is a near-separatlon—but she returns to her husband and the woman who first sinned pays the price. "Morals For Men" has been well mounted, but the story Is so conventional and along the old beaten track that is does not measure up to what we are demanding of the screen these days. Ruth Noller Is playing on the organ a little tune called "After I Say I’m Sorry,” while Oy Milders sings the words. Went over In fine shape while I was In the theater. Bill Includes Bill Herring playing a trombone solo, good; music by the Charlie Davis Orchestra/ lund an O. Henry comedy. At theOhlo all week. Other theaters today offer Miss Venita Gould at Keith’s: "Broadway Flashes," at the Lyric; Harry Wuiman and his Debutantes at the Palace; "The Fighting Buckaroo,” at the Isis, and burlesque at the Broadway.
Hoosier Briefs A Negro who applied for shelter at the El wood Jail created a sensation. He was tho only Negro In the city and the first ever to sleep in the Jail. Police took up a collection to buy him breakfast. Police Chief Parson of Elwood has become a bill collector, maybe. W. IV. Sackson of Anderson has asked the chief to collect $3 which he said was to have been paid to him by Charles Riley of Elwood following an automobile accident. Old Dobbin will “go by the board” in Bloomington following an order by the American Express Company to motorize the department. The Hartford City cupid shirked his duty during March. Only six frail crafts were launched on the troubled seas of matrimony, court house records show. Grant County dance hall proprietors have received a second "Sunday closing” order from Sheriff Bert Renbarger. Many of the owners thought the order was only for last summer, Renbarger said, so a second order was issued to clarify the situation. Plans are being drawn for a $25,000 gymnasium for Wildcat township at Windfall. Tipton chapter No. 114 R. A. M. and Tipton Council No. 80, R. & g, M., will be inspected Tuesday at 4 p. m., by Grand Lecturer Herbert A. Graham of Elkhart Charles Andrews, former Monde H‘<rh School athlete, figured promlnen ly in a daring rescue at sea of seven men from a Greek sponge boat seventy miles off the coast of Florida, according to a letter received by his parents. The survivors had drifted ten days without food.
S3 IN INDIANA =
NOT SO MUCH BUILDING Bert Westover, city building commissioner, reports a decrease in building activities in March compared with the same month in 1925. In March this year 1,345 permits representing a total valuation of $2,090,023 were issued,, while in March last year the number of permits was 1,787, with a valuation of $2,454,598. At first glance from these figures one gets the impression that the expansion of Indianapolis is slowing down. But probably inclement weather was the principal reason for the decreased building activities. Prospective builders were too busy during the month chasing flu germs to think about erecting new houses. However, even with the decrease In March, Indianapolis ranks high among the cities of the country in new building. A. survey, Just competed by the Indiana Limestone yuarry men's Association, of the new building In the United States the first three months of 1926 shows that In valuation of permits Issued Indianapolis Is eleventh among cities. In population Indianapolis rank* about twentieth. And among the cities of greater population which are below the Hoosler metropolis in building activities the first quarter of this year are Seattle, New Orleans, Baltimore, Pittsburgh, Milwaukee, Kansas City, Minneapolis and Buffalo. So Indianapolis Is still doing business at the old stand and growing at a satisfactory pace. Wind, rain, snow and blizzards, depressed its buildings for which permits were Issued during the month would make a town larger than 95 per cent of Indiana's towns. Indianapolis Is a mighty solid fact. HOW MANY DO YOU KNOW? With the close of the filing period Saturday night more than 800 Marion County citizens are In the race for nomination at the May 4 primary election for township, county, State, legislative and congressional jobs. And It Isn't a very goad spring for office seekers at that. The list of aspirants Is much shorter than two years ago. Up In Madison County 400 candidates have filed for nominations for county and township offices. In Boone County there are 220 willing patriots on the primary list. And In Grant County 300 Republicans and Democrats seek places In the sun, the largest number of candidates In the county's history. 80, in comparison with our neighbors, the. number of office seekers in Marlon County Is very moderate. Our primary ballot won't look any more like a telephone directory than most of them. Possibily every one of the 300 Marion County candidates was persuaded to file by urgent friends and clamorous populai demand and is qualified for office. It may be that each is actuated solely by desire to serve the public. But how can the voters select the best men for office from such a list? How many of the 300 do you know personally? What do you know of their records and qualifications? A conscientious voter would have to spend all of the thirty days remaining before the primary In Intensive study to familiarize himself sufficiently with records ind characters of the candidates to vote Intelligently. It Isn't surprising that confronted with such a list the average voter goes Into the booth, shuts his eyes and stabs blindly. Perhaps the primary system Is
THE VERY IDEA By Hal fYrhrnn —
Inspiration Sometimes a fella can’t get down to work. His minds’ full of cobwebs; his pep full of shirk. The going, at best, rather strikes him as rough and he sidetracks his toil, ’cause he’d much rather "sluff.” It may be that something has kinda got wrong, and hindered the smoothness cf plugging’ along. Ills normal ambition has met with reverse through some little thing that, of course, might be worse. But, when a man’s aimin’ to hit on all four, and fate sticks its nose in and gums up his score, he often gives in to the easiest way and work thoughts are carelessly slopped for a day. It all goes to prove that he’s human, I guess, an’ Just a bit weak, if he’d really confess. The get-up and pep-up is easy to lack. The thing that he needs is a slap on on the back. How often does man give the credit that’s due to someone. when needed, who always comes through? He’ll swing back in form, full of grit, full of life, through real inspiration that comes from his wife. • • • There are 60,000,000 conversations held over tho Bell telephones in the United States every day. No wonder tlie line's busy. • * • No man is really satisfied with his lot—until there’s a house built on it. ** * h It’s a great piece of advice—make the best of what you've got. But whatcha gonna do if ya haven’t got anything? • • • The brand new car would climb no hills. The owner raised the devil. The dealer said, "I told you It Was fine, upon the level.” * • • NOW, HONESTLY—’Sfunny how people go into & restaurant, read over the menu, and complain ’cause nothing looks good. We Just don’t st6p to think that maybe it’s our fault—instead of the restaurant’s. It’s purty dern dlffloult to give folks what they want, when they don’t know what It Is. And that’s the position an eating place la in some of the time. When you can't make up your
APRIL 5, 1926
vastly superior to the old method of hand-picking party nominees by a conference of bosses In a smoke-filled hotel room at 2 a. m. But even the prlmn'ry system, with Its flood of self-starting candidates, makes the selection of qualified public officials a hit-or-miss affulr. SECRETS OF THE MOUNDS Through Investigation, excavation and exploration of some of Indiana's ho called Indian mounds this summer la planned by a number of Hoosiera interested in archeological subjects. It Is believed trinkets, utensils and bones will be unearthed that will tell much of the early Hooslers, No doubt archeologists will bo Interested. Indiana has many mounds that excite their curiosity that have not been opened und explored systematically. Opening them may reveal who the mound builders were and why. That's the sort of thing that excites the archeologists. But to the average person It makes little difference whether the secrets of the mounds are revealed or not. Mound exploration won’t affect the fall political campaign, the prloe of gas or matters of dally Ufa Nevertheless we would like to know about the mound builders, who they were, how they Uved, what they thought. To gratify that curiosity the most likely Indiana mounds will eventually be carefully explored. Archeology Is funny business. One who digs up the skeleton of a prehistoric Hoosler and, by a study of the remains, Is able to tell us whether the original owner of the skeleton died of whooping cough or a lapse In his alimony, we honor and applaud. We call him a great scientist. If one excavates a more recent Hoosler by digging in Crown Hill eemetery, we call him a graverobber and put him In Jail. In either case the effect is the samo on the gentleman dug up. JUNK DEALERS’ LICENSES Walter Dorsett. city councilman, expects to Introduce an ordinance at the meeting of the council to night Increasing the city license fees to be paid by Junk dealers from SIOO to SI,OOO. To Increase the city’s revenue Is the motive for the proposed boost. It Is explained. If adopted, the ordinance will require that the singing of the wellknown aria "any ol’ rags, ol’ bones, ol* bottles today” In Indianapolis streets must be accompanied by a real tinkling of the city cash register. Perhaps there In ample Justification for boosting the license fee on the junk dealer. It will prevent the fly-by-nlght, Irresponsible Junk men from practicing their profession and protect the citizenship of the community. And, of course, there Is the additional revenue. But the whole system of requir- - lng the payment of city license fees by those who would engage In a few specified occupations In the city has little to commend It except that It Is an easy method of raising the revenue. Why should a Junk dealer be compelled to pay a license fee any more than a lawyer, a music teacher or a preacher? Certainly his business is no more dangerous to the peace and health of the community than that of the attorney or a dance Instructor. If an arbitrary license fee Is required from one occupation, unless It Is required from all occupations, It Is a most Inequitable form of taxation. The singling out of a few classes of business for special Impositions Is a survival of the medieval system of raising public revenues.
mind as to what will pleaee the palate, you oan't expeot the menu card to have It scheduled. Most anything tastes good—ls you’re In a good frame of mind. e e e When a girl marries % man who drinks, It's either to reform y find out where he gets It, e e e BUM: I understands that ray Who used to give you money ha* gone and got married. BUMMER: Yeah—-at my expense e e e TRT THIS ON YOUR HARP: The nervous man took a room above a bowling alley whore he oould hear a pin drop, • • e King Alfonso of Spain denies that he Is to fly to South America by airplane—vfhich ruins our whole afternoon. • • A chauffeur's youngster thinks the chauffeur’s boss Is the man who goes riding la hie daddy’s car. • • • It’s really very easy for a fellow to find a girl who Is different from other girls—'cause most girls are. • • • Folk wondered was he married, but the answer ne’er came out, ’Cause trouble was the one thing that He never talked about. • • • When a man wants to marry a girl, the outcome often depends on the Income. • • • FABLES IN FACT ONCE THERE WAB A FELLOW WHO WAS PINCHED Ft) it HOUSEBREAKING PERIOD HE HIRED A LAWYER TO DEFEND HIM COMMA AND ASKED COM- 1 MA AS A SPECIAL FAVOR THAT SAID LAWYER CLEAN THE CASE UP AS QUICKLY AS POS BIBLE PERIOD NOW THE LAWYER WAS A VERY AGREEABLE 80RT OF GUY COMMA SO HE" WORKED HARD AND HAD HIE CASE OFF IIIS HANDS IN JUBT A WEEK PERIOD YOU’LL HAVE TO ADMIT THAT WAS SPEED DESPITE THE FACT THAT IT TOOK THE HOUSEBREAKER A COUPLE OF MONTHS TO GET HIS SIDE OF IT CLEANED UP PERIOD. (Copyright. 192% XBR StanrtoMi Inc.)
