Indianapolis Times, Volume 35, Number 164, Indianapolis, Marion County, 22 November 1923 — Page 4

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The Indianapolis Times EARLE E. MARTIN. Editor-In-Chief ROY W. HOWARD, President ALBERT W. BUHRMAN, Editor WM. A. MAYBORN, Bus. Mgr. Member of the Scripps-Howard Newspapers • • • Client of the Tnlted Tress, United News. United Financial. NEA Service, Pacific Coast Service and member of the Scrtpps Newspaper Alliance. • * • Member of the Audit Bureau of Circulations. Published dailv except Sunday by Indianapolis Times Publishing Cos.. 25-29 S Meridian Street. Indianapolis. • • • Subscription Rates; Indianapolis—Ten Cents a Week. Elsewhere—Twelve Cents a Week • • • PHONE—MAIN 3500.

RABBITS AKD SOME MEN A*" N INDIANAPOLIS hunter returns from the rabbit chase. ___l He has not had a good day, for the tail of only one bunny protrudes from his bag. All his life this rabbit spent in fear. In fear he gathered his daily food. Trembling at every sound he lay in his hole when the day’s tasks were done. He was afraid of the falling leaf, of the chirp of the cricket in the night and of the footfall of a child. If he could have been magically transformed into a man. he would have been one of those men who fear to express an honest opinion lest they might injure themselves in their business He would have been one of those men who whisper against the evils that bother the community, but fear to speak out. He would have been a furtive man who never tells how he votes aud will take both sides of a question, fearing to favor either. Rabbit men! Unfortunately, there is no open season on them. BLUNDER OF A CENTURY ILUNDERS which literally make the hair stand on end to __ contemplate; blunders which have already cost the people of the United States billions of dollars and will cost them untold billions more; blunders which may yet reduce half the world to a shambles and result in a flareback on you and yours terrible to contemplate, have been committed cumulatively by your representatives in Washington during the last two years. Secretary of State Hughes tells us, and truly, that the German reparations question is a world problem directly affecting the United States. He admits that unless it is quickly settled, what is already a disaster in Europe may spread around the world. It has already cost American farmers at least $10,000,000,000 and merchants and business men generally incalculable additional amounts. Other ranking officials admit reparations is the key to the world situation and that unless it is settled shortly, horrors yet undreamed of await Europe and, by repercussion, corresponding sufferings over here. We are even now preparing to feed 2,000,000 starving children in Central Europe this winter and no man can foresee the end. Thus Washington at last confesses we are all inextricably bound up in an issue which less than a year ago it said was no concern of ours. When we had the chance to settle the problem, we turned it down. Congress turned it down, stupidly and shortsightedly, on the ground it was Europe’s business and not ours. It was either lack of gumption or rotten politics. Take your choice. With the blood of our American boys we had bought the right to have a say in the making of peace, including the right to sit on the reparations commission which today virtually holds the fate of the world in its hands. Our interests are vitally at stake, yet we have no voice in the matter. Whatever happens now, we have only ourselves to blame. We let petty politicians barter away what we paid for with good American lives—the right to help make the vorld secure, to help stave off another war, to help keep war-breeders from invading our homes and driving off our breadwinners to make cannon fodder of them on far-off battlefields. We had the chance but we threw it away. They are beginning dimly to realize something of all this now in Washington and are trying to make repair. We hope it is not too late.

WHEREIN GEORGE TELLS US jFHEORGE BERNARD SHAW, that English-Irish scribbler Nj who writes with interest but talks through his whiskers, has been at it again. He tells an English educational journal that the marks of an educated man ‘‘are intellectual and moral imbecility.” That is bad enough, left as it is, but George prescribes a remedy. It is “the destruction of civilization by educated men.” This involves incidentally, he explains, the destruction of educational institutions and the consequent escape of mankind from education to “the comparative sanity and mental competence of savagery.” Tt will be seen at a glance that George is not in love with ednc .tion. He doesn’t say so exactly, but his deportment indicates it. He couldn’t be more savage about it, were he not civilized. Perhaps we are enjoying “the sanity and mental competence of savagery,” even now. There are signs that may be read as we run. Take the man who obtained savage delight by placing a slimy frog in his wife’s bathtub, for instance. Or that other one who grinned savagely because his wife became frantic when he made a daily pastime of setting the family dog on her. Or still the other one who found his savage kick in feeding lighted cigarette stubs to innocent monkeys in a zoo. Or, again, that nice, motherly woman who exploited her sanely savage ideas of charity by beating a weak little girl she had “taken to raise” until paralysis and heart trouble sent the child to a civilized hospital and the woman to a savage jail. Or the thousands of other instances of like savage character that mark, not the destruction of civilization, but the need of it. Always there is to be found some mental structures that fail to comprehend education and civilization, but it is not due to the fault or falsity of the latter. What we really need and want is more and more civilization of the right kind and less of Shaw and his mental vagaries. We have too much savagery now. WALL STREET is overjoyed with the extra dividends many companies are declaring. These announcements have made al most as big a hit in the Street as Secretary Mellon’s tax reduction proposals. SENATOR CUMMINS advocates holding the Republican national convention in Des Moines, because it would be like saying to the farmers, “Yes, we shall give your claims careful consideration.” They’ve all heard that tune before. THE Association Against the Prohibition Amendment has discovered “evidences that the Anti-Saloon League is ‘snuggling up to the Administration.’ ” Is this an indication that the Coolidge regime is not as frigid as generally reported? STATE Department says Japanese are “rigidly obeying gentleman's agreement.” Labor Department says “11,571 Japa nese entered California last year.” Something lacking in the ooirdination department.

MARKETING PROBLEM IS TOUGH ONE Cooperative Associations Are Suggested as Palliative or Cure. This Is the fourth of a serins of articles on the agriculture problem, written by Herbert Quick for the Indianapolis Times. Quick is a former editor of Farm and Fireside and is himself a West Virginia farmer This article is on “Co-operatives for Marketing." By HERBERT QUICK HE farmer sells for what the buyer is willing to give. He ■i buys for what the seller asks. This has been his complaint always. I heard it when I was a child. It is in all the complaints of the farmers today. One remedy strenuously advocated is cooperation. It offers the most hope of any of the palliatives suggested. It works. Take the case of the Eastern Shore truckers of Virginia and Maryland, for instance; though I might take the raisin growers, the cotton growers, the wool growers, the poultry men, the grape growers, the apple men, or many others in many places. But the Eastern Shore Truck-Growers Association will serve as in illustration. There are 60,000 farmers in this association. It cooperates in marketing its truck crops. One year it handled $19,000,000 worth of products. It has a trade mark. These 60,000 men act as a unit. Their trade mark stands for quality in their crops. Are Next Informed They have men on the markets to look out for their Interests. They keep informed as to the demand. They can divert their shipments from a market that is glutted to a place of scarcity. They can not cut out all the middlemen —at least, they can not as yet sell direct to the consumer. But the profits are shown by the Increase in the value of farm lands devoted to raising their crops. These cooperatives all over the country, when they get. going, cooperate In many ways besides selling and standardizing; of their output. They buy fertilizers and other necessaries cooperatively. They have men employed who study their problems. They can delve Into the mysteries of the railway freight schedules and can get the best rates the law allows, which the Individual man can not do. They can ship in and out In car lots. They can often maintain their own commission men on the great markets. They can know Just what their grades are. as in cotton and tobacco. In livestock they can maintain breeding rings to pass breeding animals from neighborhood to neighborhood. They can Improve their breeds. They can standardize butter and cheese. They can ripen their cheese properly. They can and do hosts of such things Coopera tlnn Hindered Cooperation in the United States among the farmers has been hindered rather than helped by the various organizations of farmers which have made the mopt noise The Orange, the Gleaners, the American Society of Equity, the old Farmers’ Alliance and the present American Farm Bureau Federation have t*-en organizations of farmers as farmers. The cooperation of such organizations as the Eastern Shore Truck Growers is malnlv cooperation in selling We have all heard of Rochdale ooopera'lon. Senator Brookhart makes It the chief plank In his platform and his trip to Europe makes him all the stronger In Its advocacy. The Rochdale cooperation Is the system worked out a century ago by the weavers of Rochdale, and has succeeded because it is just. It has grown to enormous proportions It grew up in a city. In a word, it attempts to eliminate the middleman in buying. Senator Brookhart is laying out a much larger program than a mere organization of farmers In distribution.

Has Its limitations After the great farm smash in 1920 the National City Bank called attention to the fact that this would depress morally and financially about half the people of the United States. Cooperation hne Its limitations—but it would help the cities a great deal. But there are two sides to cooperation—the farm side and the city side. The great cooperative societies of England are mainly city cooperatives. The great cooperatives of Germany, Italy. Scotland and England which come, or used to come, to America and buy their cotton for mills, wheat for their flour, their cheese, butter, meats and the like, were cooperative societies of city people. Cooperation will not he in position to do everything it can do for the farmers or for the city folks until there are cooperative societies In the cities which will do business with the cooperatives of the farm. When this comes to pass there will not be such a crime as the present, with wheat going down in price as bread g*ts dearer. A Thought I was eyes to the blind, and feet w'S I to the lame. I was father to the poor; and the cause which I knew not I searched out. —Job 23:15, 1(5. • • * JI , lIS not enough to help the feeble up, But to support him after. —Shakespeare.

Heard in the Smoking Room

wrrriKTOß HUGO,” said the llterY ary smoker, "was a great writer, but a man of insufferable conceit and a total lack of humor. In his late life nothing pleased him more than to have his friends drop in and talk about him He would listen enraptured as their foolish praise of him fell on his ears. Sometimes th*y rather plastered the salve on I thlakly, but It made no difference to Victor. There seemed to be no limit to his high estimate of himself, and he was so devoid of humor that he could not recognise the fact that, very often, he wns being reused. One

THE INDIANAPOLIS TIMES

UNUSUAL PEOPLE Colonel to Mechanic

By NEA Service V - ANCOUVER, B. C., Nov. 22. Vladimir Dmohovsky used to be looked up to as one of Russia’s military elite, a colonel of the imperial Russian staff, trusted intimate of the Grand Duke Nicholas, member of the JT ; famed Cadet Corps Militaire of St. U Now Dmohovasky is looked down upon as a mere apprentice mechanic, learning In a strange country a craft that will provide himself and his wife with bread and lodging. But the former colonel, as clean and slick on the job in Roy Howard’s garage here, as he used to appear at the head of his company, is also storing information that may help him when the call comes from overseas. For he has this hope—for the overthrow of the soviet republic. When that times comes he hopes his knowledge of auto engine® will help him In the aircraft division of the anti-soviet army. #)OM SIMS Says 1 F people look like what they | I eat, as a lAtndon doctor says, *la great many are eating beeta. You would think you were sleeping longer If you could watch the clock while you did It. Hard thing about getting rich Is there are so many ways not to do it and so few days to do it. Astronomers say we will have no sun In 86,000,000 years. Others say It. Is 86,000,000 years too long. IVtost of the Russian names should be against the law. Movie stars are getting so they get real mad if their weddings make them late for dinner. Train conductors report the rising generation healthy. Many kids of four look to be ten. Only safe place for a speeder is the Sahara Desert, where roads are as wide as they are long. Statistics show that, much to the cow’s disgust, the people are eating more beef. Lighting three cigarettes with one match or stepploe off a moving car backward Is bad luck. When making marmalade, it Is easier to go buy the darn stuff. A disgusted grocer tells us he is broke because he not only gave credit where credit wrh due. One lightning bolt hit. two Peoria fill.) churches. Quit putting buttons In the collection. A political j>arty Is an organization to split about something. Washington scientists produced a temperature 426 degrees below zero, but it Is not for Bale. Every time we see a headline from French Lick, we wonder if It means French Lick, Germany.

Tongue Tips

Rev. H. A. Qultmeyer, Tabor Evangelical Church, Detroit: “Dry propaganda, election propaganda, criticism of men and of the Government, politics, literature and what not are drawn on for sermon topics. Such things have no rightful place in the pulpit. The business of the Christian Church Is to preach the gospel, to ‘teach them to observe all things whatsoever I have commanded.' ” Dr. W. F. Slocum, president Japan Society, Boston: "The responsibility resting upon Japan, Great Britain and the United States is beyond any one’s ability to estimate. The opportunity that confronts them, if they keep in unison as they should, is of the high est importance to the whole future of the human race. They will hold plaoes of masterful and constructive power for centuries to come. Thomas E. Johnson, superintendent public Instruction. Michigan: "Too many of our children eat candy at recess time or at lunch time. Bet us urge them to eat an apple instead. We have heard about vltamlnes. Apples have them. If we can change the inclination of the youngsters from candy to apples, we will have accomplished for them a vast measure of good.” Dr. D. J. Evans, teacher of Kansas City’s great Bible class: “A man asked me what I taught that drew so many men to the First Baptist men’s class. I told him I forgot all theology I ever knew and I searched .for the fundamental things, the vital things that enter Into a man’s life. The fact Is, we preachers have been chaperons for sororities when we ought to have been talking to red-blooded men and getting down to the realities of life.”

night several of his friends were present and, of course, he was the subject of their conversation. One of them said, as a starter: ‘Streets ought to be named after Victor Hugo.’ “ ’Streets?” said another. ‘Why, Paris ought to change its name and be called Victor Hugo.’ " ‘Bah,’ said another. ‘Name Paris after such a great man? No, indeed. France ought to change Its name and the whole country be called Victor Hugo.’ "Lifting his head with Jovian dignity, the great writer spoke In a tone of solemn, sober oonviction, ’That will come In time.’ "

ELECTION WILL FORCE FORD’S HAND Auto King Must File Intentions by Dec. 4 in Dakota if He Makes Race. BY LAWRENCE MARTIN (Copyright, 1923, by United Press) AiSIIINGTON, Nov. 22.—The Uy country soon will know deflnitely whether Henry Ford will be a candidate for the presidency. The South Dakota Democratic State convention, which will be held Dec. 4, will end the uncertainty about Ford’s intentions, if he does not end it himself before that. Under South Dakota law, a declaration of intention must be filed by any person receiving even minority support in the State convention and who desires to figure in the presidential primary March 25. It now appears likely the Democratic convention there will be divided between Ford and McAdoo. County proposal conventions held Tuesday gave McAdoo a lead, though it was agreed doubt concerning Ford’s willingness to be a candidate had something to do with throwing some delegates to McAdoo. Will File I>ecJai-ation McAdoo’s declaration will be filed promptly following the South Dakota convention, and this will put him formally in the race. Ford's position was uncertain, due largely to conflicting reports and statements. Ford himself has been quoted as saying he did not desire (he presidency and would not campaign for the nomination. Settlement of the question by an authoritative announcement such as a declaration in South Dakota, is awaited with great interest by the chief lieutenants and supporters of other candidates, both Republican and Democratic, for the campaign will he one thing with Ford' and another without him. If he gets into the Democratic race that eliminates him finally from the Republican campaign. His chance of getting the Republican nomination has never amounted to much. Ford probably will have some delegates in the national convention. Much to McAdoo Ford’s decision is of tremendous Importance to the McAdoo forces. They have counted all along on eventually getting the Ford delegates In tho Democratic rational convention. If Ford stays out there will at once be a scramble to line up his delegates. The McAdoo group has the “Inside track" here, but it would really be a free for-all fight. “If Ford stays in, McAdoo’s workers will have to continue their present efforts to arrange for taking over the Ford strength If it becomes apparent In the national convention that Ford cannot be nominated.

Indiana Sunshine

Police a:. Ft. Wayne arc looking for a huckster who sold Thomas Black ■aHI, local grocer, ten cases of "strictly fresh eggs.” The man collected 1128 and departed. Some time later the grocer unpacked the eggs. In each case there was one layer of eggs. Beneath this nothing was found but puper und bricks. Earl Pope of near Shelbyville went coon hunting. Ills prize hunting dog picked up a hot trail. The way led across a road. As the dog followed It an automobile halted, bundled the animal in the machine and sp >ded away. Pope says taking a dog off a coon track Is outrageous. Probably the only law offloe in the State of Indiana located in a log cabin la that of Attorney R. L. Morgan of Bloomington. Morgan, an antique fancier, bought a log caiiln 104 years old, and fitted It up at his home as an office. Over the door is a flint-lock gun. Over the fireplace hangs an old-fashioned lion kettle, end beside this is a spinning wheel and flax. In one corner Is a grandfather's clock, 150 years aid. The Jackson County jail is a pretty lonesome place these days. It hae but one inmate, (Jharies Sheldon, who wouldn’t have been there, but failed to iay dog taxes. His sentence of fourteen days will end Friday. The old Billy Glass tavern, reputed to bo the oldest building in the town >f Adams, Decatur County, is to b Urn down to make room for a garage. It is the last reminder of the pioneer fnniilies in the early 80s. Science The study,,in recent years, of the green leaves of plants has opened an astonishing vista into the existence and structure of all living tilings. Tin> substance within the leaves that makes them green is called chlorophyll. It is this substance that m;ikes possible all life on this planet. Carbon dioxide gas exists in the air—about one part of the gas to 3,000 parts of the air. This gas, when acted on by sunlight, in the presence of chlorophyll, with water contiiining minute particles ol‘ earth salts, manufactures the food that makes plants grow. All birds, inset!?, fishes and animals, Including man, are dependent upon green plants for their lives The loftiest tree in the forest and man himself is only a skeleton of carbon atoms around which circulate the invisible gases of oxygen, nitrogen, hydrogen and others Taboo Next year the W. C. T. U. will celebrate the fiftieth anniversary of Its formal organization. What! Can it be possible that it took nearly halfa century to bring national prohibition? To hear some people talk, you’d think prohibition was thrust upon us overnight while we slept. Os some 2,500 counties in the United States only about 150 were wet when national prohibition be'came effective. The others already had climbed on the wagon, mostly by popular vote.

“Do Your Christmas Shopping Early”

QU ESTIONS Ask - The Times ANSWERS

You can get an answer to any question of fart or information by writingto the Indianapolis Times’ Washington Bureau. 1322 New York Ave.. Washington. D C., enclosing 2 cents tn stamps for reply. Medical, legal and marital advice cannot be (riven, nor can extended research be undertaken. All other questions will receive a personal reply Unsigned requests cannot be answered. All letters are oonfidenUal.—Editor. When was the manufacture of casing head gas begun and what is the process? Casing head gas has been made since 1904. An oil which has the faculty of absorbing gasoline from na tural gas is sprayed downward through a tall pipe or tower, while the natural gas is forced up. The natural gas coming out at tho top Is practically without gnsoline, while the oil at the bottom has absorbed it. Then, by a simple process of distillation, the gasoltne is derived from the oil, and the oil goes through thb same operation again. A good-sized plant can treat 80.000,000 cubic feet of natural gas this way. and obtain at least 8,000 gallons of gasoline a day. What are the yearly expenses of the Veterans’ Bureau 1 ' According to the director's report for the fiscal year 1921-1922, $480,000,000 was spent for all purposes by the Veterans' Bureau. The appropriation for the present fiscal year is $431,000,000. What are some Indian names suitable for men and women? For women: Cholena—bird; Otokson—star; Winona —first bom daughter; Zitkala—little bird; Kimlmela—butterfly; Nltuna —my daughter; Namid—dancer. For mon; Swangideed —brave- Oglma,—chief; Mlgisl—eagle; Viho—leader. . Where was the lost notable victory of the American Expeditionary Forces In France? Describe it. At Sedan. Preceding the advance of the Americans upon Sedan, came a cloud of aviators in pursuit and bombing planes, headed by the famous aces of the American forces. The Ist and 2d Divisions of the Ist Army led the way. In the van of the 2d Division were the Marines. The famous Rainbow Division made the most savage thrust of the action, pursuing the foe ten miles and sweeping tho Freya Hills clear of machine nests and German artillery.

A teacher has written to our Washlngton Bureau RSklng for a list of good hooks for children for use In connection with "Children's Book Week,” Nov. 11 to 17. Any other render Interested in securing such a list may obtain a bulletin on the subject by writing to our Washington Bureau, enclosing a twocent postage stamp for reply.

What does Ohio mean? This iB an Indian word meaning beautiful water. When was Chicago/ settled? The. site of Chicago was discovered in 1(573, but tho flrsrt house was not built until 1770, by Jean Baptiste Point de Salble. In 1796 he sold his claim to Le Mai, a French iur trader, who in turn sold to John Kinzie, the first white man to make his home there. In ISO3 F*t. Dearborn was erected on the south bank of the river. Which is the best form of the verb, "plead” or “pleaded?” Either is correct, but authorities prefer “pleaded.” What Is meant by “Stone Age?” A term commonly used to denote the earliest recognized stage In the development of human culture as defined by the materials used by man for weapons, utensils, etc. The phrase Is somewhat misleading, since it Is probable that primitive man made use of woo<( and other perishable materials to a £&r greater extent than of stone, and consequently the stage is defined by the prevailing material of tho relics which have survived, rot by that of actual implements in common use.

NEW FORDS FOR RENT Drive Yourself —All Models m No Red Tape. New Central Station WALTER T. BOYER CO. 38 Kentucky Av,, , LI. 7886

Hopeless (The Bridge Fiend's Lament) BY BERTON BRALEY Oh, she is young and slender, And pretty as a peach; Her smile is warm and tender, And gracious is her speech. Few girls are any fairer, Yet my affection slumps; I can’t forgive this error. She won’t get out her Trumps! Sweet, kind and altruistic, Bright, sensible and sane, She’s gay and optimistic And has a clever brain. She’s thrifty, wise and canny And gives my heart the thumps, But this thing gets my nanny. She WON’T get out the Trumps! She’d be a wife and mother To make a fellow proud. There isn’t any other Can match her in the crowd; There's no one any truer. Rut —here’s the fact that stumps, (Oh, Bridge Fiends, dare I woo her?) She WON’T get out the Trumps. (Copyright, 1923, NEA Sen-ice, Inc.)

Know Your City Indianapolis, at the end of 1922, was conservatively estimated by the United States census bureau to have a population of 342,718, an increase of 28,524 over 1920 figures, according to Activities, organ of the Indianapolis Chamber of Commerce.

Family Fun

Tip Dodger. Albert Keller, the well-known hotel man, was telling stories about tip dodgers. "A mean man,” he said, "ate a good meal at a restaurant, and then, when he was through, dropped a half dollar on the tloor. "Walter,” he said, as he paid his bill. "I just dropped two half dollars. Find them for me, wall you?” The waiter obligingly disappeared under 1 the table, and in a short time emerged very red In the face. "I’ve found one o fthem, sir,” he said. “Thanks,” said the man, as he pocketed the coin nad rose. “When you find the other keep it for yourself—tip, you know.”—Judge. She Fooled ’Em All. “Before we were married you used to beg me to sing." "Well, you were making a fool out of me, too.” —Judge. Son From College. “Well, Dad.” said the youth Just home from college. "I made it all right and got my A. B.” “Good,” said the proud parent, "Now you can go out and get your J. O. B.” — Amor.can Legion Weekly, i

■ & Qy Christmas Jewelry and Diamonds Most of our holiday jewelry has arrived and is on display. Early shopping is urged while selections are complete. Early shopping means the most pleasant and satisfactory service. J. P. Mullally, Diamond Merchant Street Floor

EXCURSION TO LOUISVILLE, Ky. JNDAY* NOVEMBER 25 1 0 Round Trip Train leavn Trun.un Station 7 a. m. Returning; leaves Louisville 7 p. m. T. 4. GORE, Joint Ticket Agent. Main 4600 INTERSTATE PUBLIC SERVICE COMPANY

THURSDAY, NOV. 22, 1923

What Editors Are Saying

Sighing (Lebanon Reporter) Resolved: That constant sighing Is more immoral than chronic cussing. Nothing is more depressing than listening to a person sigh and sigh and sigh. A few emphatic cuss words are heavenly music compared to a sagging sigh. Every time we are thrown in contact with a sighing soul we give thanks to the Good Lord for the blessing of a cheerful wife. The negative will now take the floor. There being nothing to say in behalf of sinful sighing, the decision of the Judges is returned unanimously in favor of cussing as the lesser of two evils. * • • Prophecy (Bluffton Evening Banner) Jim Goodrich holds out hope for Russia—some day. No prophecy on Governor McCray. • • • Coal (Daily Clintonian) It's an unfortunate fact that oil burning and the development of electrical power have done a great deal to curtail the use of coal. But It’s going to be a long while before the main demand for coal will be a thing of the past. In the meantime, the problem of the Clinton field is to get her share The appeal for more favorable intrastate rates, so Indiana mines will have a better chance to sell to Indiana consumers, certainly is lit fin*. And it is good to have the miners themselves taking an intelligent interest in seeking such readjustments. • • - Limelight (Goshen Daily News-Times) What’s happening in Germany has ceased to be the chief souroe of mystery since Governor McCray’s flnancal' affairs emerged Into tbs ugaslight. Why? (Lafayette Journal) An Indianapolis man adds bromo seltzer to his home brew to take c&ra of the “hang over.” Why not put in also the embalming fluid, the crematory's telephone number and tho key to a mausoleum locker? Training 'Em Early S. P. C. A- Agent—l have a report that you’re in the habit of shooing your poultry into a field and then trying deliberately to run them down with an automobile. What's the idea? Farmer—The idear Is that I’ve lost more’n a dozen this past summer by sudden death on the highway, so I’m training the rest of them to be auto shy.—Judge. Willie’s Strong Exxcuse. “Dear Teacher —Please excuse Willie’s absence for the last two weeks! he caught a skunk." —Mass. Ag. Squib.