Indiana Palladium, Volume 4, Number 21, Lawrenceburg, Dearborn County, 31 May 1828 — Page 4

MISCELLANY. :ELECTt:P. FLEGYOXA QUID OF TOBACCO. It Uy before ms on tbe close graz'd grass, tde yon path, an old Tobacco Quid ; Ad shall I let tbe mute aJviw Pa5S Without oue serious thought? No, Heaven fit bid! Ptrhapa some idle drunkard threw thee there; Some husband, spendthrift of bis weekly hire; One who for wife or children takes no care, 13 ut sits nod tipples by the alehouse fire. Ah luckless was the day he learnt to chew! Embryo of ill, t he Qaid that pleased him first! I hirsty from the unhappy Quid he grew, Theo to tbe alehouse went to quench Lis tbtrst. So great events from causes small arise The forest oak was once an acorn seed: And many a wretch from drunkenness who dies,

Owes til bi evils to tbe Indian weea. Let no temptation, mortal, ere come nigh Suspect some ambush in tbe parley bid From the first kiss of love ye maidens fly! Ye youths avoid the first tobacco Quid. Perhaps I wrong tbee, O thou vet'ran chaw, And better thoughts my musings should engage, That tbou wert rounded id some toothless jaw, The joy, perhaps, ofsolitary age. One who has sutTer'd fortune's hardest knocks, Poor, and with none to tend on his gray hairs, Yet has a friend in his tobacco box, Jim! whilst he rolls his Quid, forgets his cares. Ev'n so it is with human happiness Each seeks his own according to his whim: This toils for wealth, one fame alone can bless, Ono asks a Quid a Quid is all to him. O, vet'ran chaw ! thy fibres, savory strong, Whilst aught remaiu'd to chew, thy master chewM; Then cast tbee here, when all tby juice was gone, Emblem of selfish man's ingratitude! A happy man, O cast off Quid, is be, Who, like as thou, bast comforted the poor; Jiappy his age who knows himself like thee Thou didst tby duty Man can do no more. From the Stonington Yankee. Of all tbe coquetts that are found in the nation, There is none that more cheats, than Anticipation! She wheedles all sexes, conditions and ages, The grave and the gay, and the politic sages: The young and tbe old, the. rich and tbe poor, All live on her smiles, till she turns them out door. From the Aero York Enquirer. JOE STRICKLAND. Jonstanty Nople, Jennewerry, 188. Deer lovin unkle Ben, I spnze you thort kaze I waz so darn fur of that I wasnt'goen tu rite you agin, but iph you think i kan ewer lorgit you ur Ant iNabby, yew are tarnaily mistak en, knze I should remember yew if I waz tother side ov awl kreashun. not by a darn site un iph I ever git Bale agin ill be hang d if yew ewer ketch me in tins kutthrote kuntry agin, taint half so good as old Varmount I kum plaigy neer gtarvin to deth afore I got here, we hadn't northen under he wen tu ete ha(Fi the time only Dry Kod fish un tatersfinally and tarnaily arter an ewerlastin long passage we got here Fde been see sik awl the time, un had pritty neer spewd my gizard up, til by the lord harry I vva'rnt much bigger rounk than Dekon Bigalows pichfoik handel when I got hear tha axt me if I waz ewer in Turky before, no ses 1, but I've had a darn menny turkys in me i'de alweys heerd a plaigy deel about, Turky in Urop, in the gogfry when I went tu shool tu Ikabud Krane, whare I larnt to Spell un by the jumpin jingo my mouth war terd az soon az I landed byme bye a darnashun 13ig lookin. lilak kind ova fel ler cum along with trouses on az big az meel bags, un a plaigy komikle lookin thing on his bed az big az won uv Dekon Bingham's beahives hollo ses I mister whisker, Divvle or whatsomewer yure name is, by the grate Mogul ses I, jist git me evry Turky in Urop, un i'll be darnd if I dont swaller the hole boodle uy.um at won singel meel, for i'me as hungree as a church yard hevven and airth hov tbe feller skairt me. by tbe lord he pulled out a Darnashun long krooked, kind ov a soard, that lookt for awl the world jist line old Leftenent Wedsters Hay Nife un ses he yew darn kristhun dog yue kum but ov greese, un want tu Swaller awl turky at one mowfull, ift yu say anuther wurd by the grate mayhommet, i'le kut yew up a z fine az link meet now thinks 1 beer's the divvle tu pay, but i'le spunk up tu htm so sis I, yew Darnashun Black sun ov a turnip I bavnt seen a spunfull ov greese sinse I started from york so yew may put up yure Darnashun Jong krooked nife ift you think furtu kut up ennvov yure Darn karlykews with me, I ges yule find yureselt Pritty plegly mistaken, by the grate mountin iph yew say another Sassy wurd, i'le Jump down jure tarnal throte un gallop yure guts out fur too koppcrs by Jingo be lookt pritty nigh az wite az skim milk, un ics he boo the divvle are yew, with yine spindle shanks, ses I i'me Joe Strickland from old Varmount, and darn ye-ize I've got more rale Kimikle Eilz, in my pokket than awl turky & Egipt put tugethur un i've kuin beer tu git the grand Signer to make arnold'd Bash-

or with forte thowscnt tales hevven and aertb, how kweek be bawld in his horns, kazc he'd heard about arnold & what a Darn kritter be was for selin prizes and wuz az fraid ov him az he was of the old jXik un ses he, friend Joe, will yew take a chaw ov opyum with me noe ses I I ruther take a jin kok tale by a darn site, now my deer unkle Ben, i'll jist let the kat out ov the bag & tell yew partly what I kum to this kuntry arter for

thare aint noboddy under hevven mows, only arnold and he told me tu keep my mouth klos azaklamshel till I got Bak,s yew mus'ut even tel ant nabby nothen aboutit last summer, when Sc Joe Laughton went to Nigh-agry to so that vessel go over-thc kattyrack I kum akrostanoald Squor that told me iph I wouM give her i kwart ov rum, she wou'd tel me whare Alorin was, so I give her a kimikle Dol lar Bill nou ses I whare is the Darn kritter, then she sed hel gon tu konstanty nopel, now by jingo thinks I when I go tu git Arnold made Bashor i'le jist look arter him un by the grate moses Peter I had'nt bin beer fore days afore 1 sea a komikill lookin kind ov a feller, awl drest up jist like a tirk, with big trouses on with his face lookin rite at me, but kept goiu to,ther way thinks I thats a while Hall boteman, kase he looks one way un goes tother so 1 run arter him un thinks I i'le giv him a liltel masonry, Jist tu se what he's made ov (kaze i,me a a bit ov a mason, i've been on the gridion) so ses I hello. Jubelo hello Jubelum ses he boo the divvle ar yew sis I with yare bed on tale foremust, sis he i'me, kaptin Bill morgin, un iph yull keep yure mouth shut Il'e tell yew awl about it so we set down on a stump un then he sed that he,d liv,ed in york State a good wile un koud,nt make northen, un He thort he,d kut a kaper and Print a book about frcemasonra, and then got sum fellers from Kanady to karry him of, so tha took him to nigh-ag,ary rivverand when tha got him in the middie tha chopt his bed oir with a Darn big kleavcr un Hung him ovei bored, un he swum as much az too rod afore he overtuke his bed when he grab,d it with both hands and stuck it on agin un paddled fur Kanady, whare he found an old Squor Doktor, that fasn, ed his bed on with Beaswax and Terpintime, but he had been in sech a Darn hurry he,d got the rong side afore, and DurVnt take it of agin for feer it woud.nt stick on agin- when he got well he started for Konslanty nople, un went awl the way by land now he gits a darn good price for takin kare of the grand Sinors seraglo, he is kinder kaptin ov the Unacks, that take kare ov the gals kaze, when he's goiu won way he looks tother. I told him I kum to tak him bale tu york. whare I kould git too thowscn d Hers if 1 brort him alive un if I kild him un Brort him bak ded, 1 should git three Thowsen he sed that he,d took so menny steps iu iiti, inMu mi j i it in. nit: un VI nimseii kould'nt kill him and ofllnl me foitv thowsen dollers, tu let him alone un not tel whare he is, til arter the Next leclion un i,ve agreed to say nothen about it. so you must jist keep still he toiks a grate deel about somebody, thats got a wick tu his name, but I forgit what the rest on'tis it is north wick or kandle wick or some sich-wickand he ses he'll be guvverner. in york state in spite or the divvle he lalfs as iph hevven un aertb were kummin tugether. when he bars what a Darn fuss thamak about him nou tha think he's ded. un he ses that a crate menny of them that make the most noise about him -hav menny times offerd him fore shillin to drink a kuart of Sider Brandy rite doun. jist tu see it kill him. but tha aint at the bottom on,t i'el tel yew more about it when I kum homepaper is pritty darn Skairse here or els i'de rite more, in my next letter ile tel yew about the greeks. Tie be hanged iph I no which is the best ov the too the Greeks will Steal evvry thing yuve got, un me iurKS wm lait yure bed oil. so betwene both tha ar a Dam komckle belt frum yure Lovven NeflTew til Deth JOE STRICKLAND Unkle Ben in Varmount From the desk of Poor Richard tha Scribe "IJVILL BYjLYDBYE." Zounds! sir, you may as well swear (hat you will never do il! I'm out of all patience with these "by and bye" folks. An hour of the present time is worth a week of the future. Why, I know a bachelor, who is as well calculated for matrimonial felicity as every virtue and every accomplishment can render himj but he has been putting off the happy time, from one year to another, always resolving that he would marry "by and bye," till the best ten years of his life are gone, and he is still "resolving" and I fear "he will die the same." He that would gather tbe roses of matrimony must wed in the May of life. If you wish only the withered leaves and the thorns, why, poor Richard says, put it otr till September. "Procrastination is the thief of time." I made a visit last winter to see my old friend Jeremiah Careless. When he put my horses into the stable, he took tne to his barn floor to see some wheat he had justthreshed. I observed to him

near filing, and he had belter nail it. An ImiUitic-n ' Dinmr.--It was ob"I will by and bye," said be. Things served that a certain covetous rich man about ll.P r;,rm .13 thmicrh 44iy never invited any one to dine with him.

and bye" folks lied thcre.next morning the boys carne running in with sad news. An unrulv buU'had torn off the board, and the cattle had supped andhrcakfasted on the white wheat, and old brindle, the best cow in the drove, was foundered so that she died. Now two nails worth a penny, and five minutes of time would have saved the life of old brindle and the white wheat in tbe bar gain. Passing by my neighbor Nod well's the other day, I saw that his wife had made a line garden, and the early peas were shooting above the ground. ;,It looks well, said I, neighbor but there is a hole in the fence, which you bad better mend, or the bogs will ruin your garden., I will "by and bye," said he. I lappening to go by there two days after, I was deafened with the cry of 'who-ee, who-ec slu-bov. stu-boy" a drove of hogs had come along, and while my neighbor was taking a nap, they had crawled through the broken fence and destroyed tbe labor of a week. "Never put off till to-morrow what you can do to day" Poor Richard says. Condensed from a recent Swedish work. Intoxication. The laws against intoxication are enforced with great rigour in Sweden. Who ever is seen drunk is fined, for the first offence three dollars; for the second, six; for the third and fourth a still larger sum and is also deprived of the right of voting at elections, and of being appointed a representativ e. He is, besides, publickly exposed in the parish church on the following Sunday. If the same individual is found committing the same client e a fifth time, he is shut up in a house of correction, and condemned to six months hard labour; and if he is again guilty, to a tw elve month's punishment of a similar description. Il the offence has been committed in public, such as at a fair, at an auction, Sec. the fine is doubled; and if the oflender has made his appearances in a church, the punishment is slil) more severe. Who ever is convicted ol having induced another to intoxicate himself, is fined three dollars, which is doubled if the drunken person is a minor. An ecclesi astic who falls into this olfence loses his benefice; if it is a layman w ho occupies any considerable post, his function are suspended and perhaps he i dismissed. Drunkenr. jss is never admitted as an Xi use lor anv crimo; and who ever dies while diunk, is buiicd ignominious!'. and de'prived of the pi a vet s ul the church. It is foi bidden to e, and more expli citlv to soil, anv seisitous honors to students, workmen, servants, apprenti i i 11 ii'i ces a ml pnvaie sonners. no ever is obseived drunk in the sti eels, or making a noise in a tavern, is sine to be taken to prison, and detained until sober, without, however, being on that account exempt eu irom me uues. naif mese tines go to the mfornieis, who are generally police officers the other half to the poor. If the delinquent has no money, be is kept in prison until some one pays for him, or until. he has woiked out his enlargement. Twice a year a list of them are read in the pulpit, by the clergy j and every tavern keeper is bound, under the penalty of a heavy fine to have a cop of them hung in the principal rooms of his house. Legislative Eloquence. The following extract from a speech of M.j. Ives of Weatfield, in the house of renresentatives of ihe slate of Mass. on the theatre question, is published in the Westfield Register. Mr. Ives rose! "Mr. Speaker Sir -I rise, Sir. to state Unit I did not soli cit the station which I hold here nor did I expect it nor am I qualified for it; and ltIunUv :Vlr. bpeaker, you and this honourable house will think so before 1 get half through -hut, I am a consistent man, and wish to be considered as such. 1 find that I was wrong in my vote yesterdayI am convinced so from the great and respectable majority that was against me. Mr. Speaker, Sir I believe I was instigated by the dtiil in my vote yesterday Sir, we were told here yesterday, by the gentleman from Boston, a long and pitiful story of one young man being ruined in consequence" of theatres what, Sir! is this the only solitary instant that can be found? I presume so, or we should have heard from it. What, Sir! tell me of the deleterous or immoral effect of theatres! Sir, I think the morals of this place are very good the citizens are very polite! I hear no cursing, or swearing Sir! I have seen more immorality in the little town I have II 1 M me nonor to represent more drunk :i I'll Smnr Irinr. -il . ...v.- .' v j di hi li us more cursing and swearing, than in this great metropolis! Sir, I believe I was instigated by the devil, in my vote yesterday--! am convinced I was wrong Sir! I am a consistent man." Here Mr. Ives was called to order by the Speaker, because he couid not perceive the pertinency of his remarks to the questsou. To the honor of virtue it is said, that a man's greatest misfortunes are generally

"I'll lay a w ager," taid a wag, 4'I get an invitation from him." The wager being accepted, he goes tlie next day to this rich man's bouse, about the time be was known to sit down to dinner, and tells

the servant that he must speak with his master immediately, for that he could ave him a thousand pounds. 'bir, said the servant to his master, 4Miere is a man in a great hurry to speak with yn J who says he can save you a tnousanu pounds!" " Yes, sir, 1 can but I see you are at dinner; 1 will go myself and dine, and call again." "0 pray, Sir, come in and take a dinner with me." "Sir, I shall be troublesome." "Not at al!." The invitation was, accepted. As soon as dinner was over, and the family retired. "Well, sir," said the man of the house, -now to our business. Pray let me know bow am to save this thou sand pounds?" "Why,sir," said the other, "1 hear you have a daughter to dis pose of in marriage.7' "I Have." "Auu that you intend to portion her with ten thousand pounds." "I do so." "Why, then, sir, let me have her, and I will take her with nine thousand." The master of tbe house rose in a passion and turned him out of doors. Backgammon Boards. We frequently find backgammon boards with backs lettercd as if they were two tolio volumes. The origin of it was thus: Eudes, Rishop of Sully, forbade bis clergy to play at chess. As they were resolved not to obey the commandment, and yet dared not have a chess-board seen in their houses or cloisters, they had them bound and lettered as books, and played at night, before they went to bed, instead of reading the New Testament or the Lives of the Saints; and the monks call ed the draft or chess board their u-ooden gospels. They bad also drinking-vessels bound to resemble the breviary, and were found drinking, when it was supposed they were at prayer. From the Boston Evening Bulletin. Refinement. Should any one doubt the fact, that the people of the United States are the most learned and enlight, ened,and classical people under heaven, let him peruse the effusions that are daily emanating from our political presses. Apollo and his hand maids, that were wont in old times, to caper about on the summit of the Parnassianmount,tieading on flowers, breathingand conversing with gods, have now become mere scullions and scavengers in the service of Adams and Jackson: ezgratiu an "Adorns man" says Had General Jackson New Orleans lost, The presidential path bVJ never crossed! To w hich a "Jackson mail" responds If Henry Clay had died at Chent, Would Adams have been Pesi dent? Mot sublime couplets! equal to the ncignificient maxim of Monsieur Jean L'unir, the celebrated reformer, who declares that First, -to make man think at all, Is, of all things, tha princi it. Or the rhyme of the Kentucky songster Come all ye bold Kentuckians, I'd have you for to know. That for to fight the enemy we'iG goic S far to go! An Irish Serjeant on a march beinc; attacked by a dog, pierced the animal with his halbert. Oa the complaint ot the owner, the superior cilice; said to the otiender Murphy you were wrong in this. You should have struck the dog with the hut end of your halhert, and not with the blade.' "Phis your honor,' says Murphy, 'and I would ha' been glad for to save myself the trouble of claining m) iron, if lie had only been so kind as to bite me with hi3 tafl instead of hh teeth,' A yount; gentleman near Manchester having a fine water spaniel, in order to exhibit lis powers to some spectators, threw a id one into the pond; the dog went m alter it, and brought up z green bag containing a line violin ant now. An Irishman cried out "(brow another stone; who knows but the dog may bring up the tiddler himself? and then we can hav e a jig on the spo THE ELEG.LYT HOUSE SIK FRANCIS DRAKE TfL ill 6tand the ensuing sea 7 son, ccitimfiicinj' the 1st APri, an J ending the 1st of July nex lhe f,rst 'fcree days of each tSSSBI week on the farm of Cart. Jacob Piatt, Boone county, Ky. and the regaining three in the town of Lawrenceburgh: and so changing every third day during tbe 6eason Farmers and others desirous of improving their stock ol Horses, would do well to avail themselves of the opportunity thus offered of procuring a good strain of colts, as there are few Horses if any, in tbe Western country equl to the Sir I'iu.vcis Dsaite, io any respect whatever. jdP For particulars see Bills. A. S. PIATT. April 5, 1823. 13 tf. BLAAK DEEDS. AJYD JUSTICES

Doctor Isaac Westerfield,

(the late partner or THE celebrated Indian doctor Richard Larter,) WILL practice JUiliane in Petertburgh Ky, on ihe Ohio rivtr, 27 milea below Cincinnati, 4 below the mi uth of the Miami and near y upusite Lawrencehurgh ft. His practice will consittiii the administration ofvrgsubie tf refarunr?i vhatty.or what is more generally known by the nme cf the Indian mode of practice ; which has (in the hands of Carter and his students) been so astonishingly tffisade cku9 in hi cure of the most inveterate chioui; Hivine made himself acquainted with the regiPar iuoJ: cf pneuce in addition to the r;!v mode, he tl-ttf rs himself that he will merit and receive a shire ot public patror vge. May 9, 1S:3. 13-4a H.UiD .LV) HEAVY. AlldrCW Howard Returns hia sincere and heartfelt thanks to the inhabitants of Dearborn county, for the liberal encouragement he has received; and hopes in future to receive their patronage. He begs leave to inform tbe public that h has just purchased a new and complete cas? of Razors of the firs, quality. He may be found at John Grav'a Icq at all proper hours for busmen. My razors ytu'll find are of the best kind, Well stropped and in excellent order ; They'll shave ia a trice, so neat nd so nice. You'll own I'm a well practised IIAKTEU. My Shears, Oil nod Comb, a neat little Mroom Tor Dressing and Brushing so handy, Are always in irim shear you or brush him, Ue he ploughman, doctor or dandy. April 25, 18J8. locf EDWIN G. PRATT ATTORNEY AND COUNSELLOR. OFFICE in Lawrenceburgh at the house of JOHN SPENCER. May 1, 1S2S. 17if. By the President of the United States. IN pursuance of law, I, John Quinct Adams, President of the United States of America, do hereby declare and o ake known, that a public sale will be held at the Land Office at Washita, in tbe state of Louisiana, on the second Monday in June next for the disposal of the lands ot tbe. United States in tho following townships and fractional townships ia the Land District Nobth or Rjed Riyxr, to wit: Townships Fivs and Seven, of Range Or.e East, Townships Fotir, live, .Six, Seren&nd igh:t ol Urigt 'i'vo Easi. Townships Fuvr, Five knd Eight, of Range Frkciiond Township, Threet ci R&rge Six East. Fractional Townships, One, Two and T:.rce4 ofhange, Seven, East. Fractiunal Townships, Tno and Three, Range Eight, Est. F actional Township, A'ine, cf Range Elevei East. Township West. Seven. of Ranges One and Tst The Lands reserved by law for the use of Schooli, or for other purposes, will be excluded fiora Sale, which will proceed in the order above designated, beginning with the lowest number of section in each township. Given under my hand, at the City of Washington, this 14th d3jr of February, A. D. JOHN QUINCY ADAMS. 15y the President: GEO. GRAHAM. Coruruissioner of the Gen. Land Offica CF Piintcis of the Laws of ihe United Statts, are iffjuesttd ta publish the foregoio Proclan)aticu once a rcsek until the day of sale. Feb. 19 9tds MASONIC PROCESSION. approaching Anniversary of the Nifiviij of St. John the Haftis? will ba Celebrated by the Members of Jlising Sun Ledge No. u. en Tuesday the 24th JUNE next. The neighboring Lodges and all Brethren in regular standing are respectfully invited to attend. JOHN B. CRAFT, Secretary. Jluy 13, 1323. 19-6 w iiMoiiej Found BY the subscriber, living in Heiby township, Butler county, vhio, a sura of paper nioney being betwetn one And thrte hundred dollars. The owner by describing the money can have it by applying to Wm. WEST. April 25, 1323, 18 N U. The money was found between Dvid Diika Mi'li and Harris Tan Yard. OF ALL KLYDS JYEATLY EXECU TED AT THIS OFFICE. INDIANA PALLADIUM, PHI A TED A. YD PUBLISHED BY M. Greg? & D. V. Culley; Publishers of the Laws of the United States, TERMS. The Paixatucm is prir.ted weeklv. on s-jnpr royal paper, at THRUE DOLLARS, ner annum pid at the end of the year; which may be discharged by the piyment of TWO DOLLARS in udx ancs, or by pnyiiig TWO DOLLARS & FIFTY ut.iv lb stthe espiraton cf Six months. those v.ho leceive their papers through th Post-OiTice, or by ihe mail carrier, must pav tha carnage, otherwise it will be charertd uu their subscription. ADVERTISEMENTS Containing1 12 lines, three insertions or rr dollar; twenty-fue centa for each additional insertionlarger advertisements ia the3a:i;e pro The CASH must accornpov advertisem, m a otherwise they will be published until tv-iJJiM- , . k . " r . j . "- t the expense of the adverser.

i . . v. . l

mat one oi the boards of the barn

was occasioned by his crimei. BLAIR'S for sir p . IJ v.. tl 1 , s mu" .fce pt-it ctu;;,Yi$itUey vail uot Attended Vj.