Evening Republican, Volume 23, Number 250, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 18 October 1920 — Page 3

m feet Contents 15¥luid DxadnJ Illi A I lIK | fl Ep- — I 111 3] I For Infants and Children. H * Mothers Know That ■ Genuine Castoria jHoHOL-3 PBR GENp I 1 l-TTrnTTn # 3 A t the Signature Morphine™] q£ gt? | MinendL NbT Narcotic! UI 11 V ■gj ft J[v In n / Use \jr for Over ’■ J ncStaaeS«n«E* ot Thirty Years IM|| VBSCASTORIA Exact Copy of Wrapper. -me ccntaur company, new york city.

SEEMED LIKE AN IMPOSITION

Parvenu Couldn't Understand Why Musician Hadn't Come With Instruments Tuned. * —— Herman Finck, the noted English composer, tells the following amusing story of a somewhat ambitious attempt of a member of the newly rich to grasp matters musical. He said: “My grandfather used to direct a small orchestra of about half a dozen, which could be hired for dances, parties and weddings, and even (on one occasion only) for funerals, but that’s another yarn. Well, the orchestra one night made its appearance at the house of the type of parvenu we should call nowadays- a war profiteer. The guests were assembled and the fiddlers and so on were crowded up in the usual corner with the ferns and things. Suddenly the host approached.

“ this horrible noise you’re making?’ he said. ‘Rotten piece, I call.lt I* ( “ *This isn’t a piece,’ replied my grandfather; ‘we’re tuning up, that’s all.’ ‘“Tuning up? I engaged you over two months ago, and you’re tuning up nowT"

The Chicken's Side of It

Shirley, who had been taught to value the life of birds, was much concerned when he saw his mother preparing to kill a chicken for dinner. Catching the chicken in both his arms, he began to cry and strenuously object to its being killed. His mother in an attempt to allay his grief explained that it was all right to kill chickens, since God had given them to us for food. Still holding the chicken tightly Shirley replied between sobs: “Yes, but the chicken don’t know it”

All our sweetest hours fly fastest —Virgil. A flatterer, a hypocrite.—German proverb. «

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HAD HIGH AMBITION FOR SON

father Wouldn't Be Satisfied Until He Saw Him in a Really Proud - Position. —*• I An Instructor in the military academy at West Point was once assigned to conduct about* the place the visiting parents qf a certain cadet. After a tour of the post, the proud and happy parents joined the crowd assembled to witness evening parade, a most imposing'spectacle. The march past aroused the father of the cadet to a high pitch of enthusiasm. “There I” he exclaimed to his spouse, “Isn’t that fine? But,” he added, reflectively, “I shall not be happy till my boy attains the proud position that leads ’em all.” And he pointed In rapt admiration to the drum-major.

Not to Be Outdone.

Frances, Janet and Eleanor were discussing the respective merits of the babies in their households, and Frances had led off with: “My baby brother is only four months old and he has two teeth already.” “My little sister,” announced Janet, “is only five months old and she has three.” . , “That’s nothing,” said Eleanor. “My little brother hasn’t any teeth yet, but when he does have some they are going to be gold ones 1”

Different Though.

agitator bad talked long and wildly. “I cannot be still,” be suddenly bellowed. “The words that come Into my mouth are as numberless as the leaves on the trees.” “Yes,” agreed a weary listener as he arose, “but they’re different in ooh way. It doesn’t take much of a breeze to start them flying.”

Exceptions.

“You know, dear, man proposes.” “Not always, auntie; this is leap year."

THE EVENING REPUBLICAN, RENSSELAER, IND,

The Wretched Deceiver

By R. RAY BAKER

I (©. 1920, by McClure Newspaper Syndicate.) "It seems so good to get away from | the cares of social life,” murmured Winnie Aton, as the cool breeze of I Little Traverse bay caressed her She was speaking to Leonard Brockwell, who sat on the hotel veranda beside her, striking imaginary files on the railing with his dainty cane. I Leonard was not dainty. He was I more than six feet tall and the muscles of a perfect physique rippled under his Palm Beach stilt. He was a good-look-I Ing blond young man. I Winnie was ttie dainty one, being fashionably slim and only five feet three in height She was a pronounced brunette, and a summer-white frock with’ a tilted pink hat made her look exquisite. “Yes, ’tis so,” replied Leonard, stifling a yawn and watching a lake steamer loaf into Petoskey harbor. “But, do you know, what appeals to me most is to get away fropi driving the | everlasting motorcars. I’ve had so much of it I was glad to leave the cars in the garage and be able to stretch my legs without depending on gasoline.” “You’re right,” Winnie agreed. “Driving motors bores me to death.” Poor, pretending Winnie! Her so- i dal obligations consisted of an occasional visit to a dancing assembly back, In Chicago, when she was not too tired from her activities behind the silk counter. And all the motor she had ever driven was the relic that did service on Aunt Martha’s farm in central Ohio, where she spent last year’s vacation.

For four years Winnie had saved money, and it would have remained in the bank where It was put if it had not been for Phoebe Williams. All Phoebe had done was to go and get married. In s«ne manner she had caught a rich man, and now when she strutted into the store she left an electric out In front. That had set Winnie thinking, and she had come to the conclusion the only way to enjoy life was to have all the money one wanted; and It seemed the only way to su,ch an attainment was by means of the matrimonial knot. Her roommate had agreed, In so far as the latter part of Winnie’s philosophy was cßhcemed. “It’s done lots and lots of times,” the chum declared, “and the rich men are hooked the easiest at summer resorts. All you need is enough dough to live in style for a few weeks at one of those places, and the first thing you know some son of the idle rich Is proposing to you. It’s easy, they say, but for me, I'll stick to Jim Wilson, even If he is just a truck driver.”

That looked good—not the truck driver, but the summer resort idea — so when vacation time came Winnie drew her seven hundred dollars from the bank, invested a considerable portion of it In clothing and took a steam-, er for northern Michigan. At Petoskey she took a room in a hotel close to the shore of the bay and began her campaign. ' Winnie had the looks and personality to win, and at the start the young men staying at the hotel paid homage to her. One of them, a frail anemic youth who never drew a breath unflavored with cigarette smoke, proposed the second night she was there; but somehow, for all of bls evident wealth, Winnie could not bring herself to accept. She still,retained girlhood Ideas in which marriage minus love did not fit.

In the first week Winnie had three proposals to her credit and five hundred dollars on the other side of the ledger. She was progressing famously, but she was not satisfied. All the men who had placed themselves In her market were wealthy, no doubt; but they were insipid parasites clinging for life to the riches their more ambitious fathers had accumulated. Then along came Leonard Brockwell, and she fell in love with him. To be sure, the wealth that was evi* dent In his dress and bearing attracted her as much as his handsome , appearance; but before she had known him twenty-four hours the money question faded Into Insignificance be-

fore the man’s wonderful personality. She feared she would lose him, so she felt obliged to continue the pretense she had begun, which accounted for her reference now and then p her social sphere back home. On the fourth night the climax came. They walked along the beach. In the light of a full moon which turned the blue of the water to burnished silver. They sat In an arbor of trees and there he proposed, and she accepted. “The only girl I ever could begin to love,” he breathed, and she told him similar things; and they were the truth. ■ ■ But Winnie had a conscience, and it began to Intrude itself. She tossed all night in bed. unable to reconcile herself to the idea of having won a husband by deception. Here was this man, rich tn his own right, asking her to be his wife under the belief she was Dis social and financial equal. She began to wish he was not rich, that he was a common plodder like herself.. Early in the morning Winnie arose apd dressed, her mind made up. She loved Leonard, but she never could

accept him under the crlcumstances. She still had a week of vacation left, and she decided to spend it with Aunt Martha in Ohio. Before leaving the hotel she penned a note and left it with the clerk. "Dear Leonard,” it said, "I 6m leaving, and will never see you again. I love you, but I have been a wretched deceiver and cannot bear to look you in the face.” Thirty-six hours later she leaped from the train and into Aunt Martha’s arms. Aunt Martha escorted her to the relic that had once been an automobile, and they drove to the farm.. It was lonesome there, but Winnie made the best of it. She felt that she was atoning for her sin by shutting herself away from the world. She was pensive and moody, but she roamed the fields and woods and tried to forget the handsome rich man who had asked her to marry him. ( One day. Aunt Martha sent her on An errand.' *Tve got to churn today, Robert’s busy in the field; so we can’t get away. I wonder if you’d as soon drive the flivver to town and get that tire we left to be vulcanized? That left front one is about ready to blow out.”

Winnie welcomed the opportunity, but she smiled bitterly as she recalled her conversation in,the north relative to being bored by driving. She found the garage without trouble. stopped the flivver in front and went into the office, making her wants known to the proprietor, who looked as though he had just taken a bath in grease. “Oh, Mr. Hendricks’ tire; sure, I think It’s ready,” he said, and stuck his head out the door to call: “Oh, Len, get Mr. Hendricks’ tire, and bring it out and put it on for hie young lady.” Winnie walked back to the car and stood waiting. Presently a tall, athletic figure appearetOugging the tire. His face was so black from mechanical dirt\ that he would have passed for an Egyptian night. “Which wheel, miss?” he said, and then stopped and stared j allowing the tire to drop in the road. Winnie, puzzled by his behavior, ' studied his countenance in an effort to penetrate the make but what he looked like. Suddenly she recognized him, in spite « the grime. “Leonard!” she' exclaimed. “Is it possible? Why, I thought you—did you get my note?” “I did," he affirmed, “and I had just written one like it, to leave for you. I got sick of that business up north and beat It home about the time you did. You see, I am another wretched deceiver. All the money I possess is what I’ve saved from my wages here, and it isn’t much, and the cars I repair are! the only ones I have anything ■ to do I went resorting just to I catch a rich girl and I —well, I really wished and wished you were poor like myself, as I could —” “Well,” said Winnie, joyfully, “your wish came true, the same as mine did, so now there’s nothing to prevent—"

HILLS WERE ONCE VOLCANOES

Thousands of Years Ago, What Are Now Pleasure Resorts, Near Montreal, Were to Be Dreaded. Near Montreal are eight great hills, each bearing two names, and known collectively as the “Monereglan Hills,” which now are believed to be nothing more than the roots of former volcanoes tlfat reared themselves thousands of feet Into the air, and belched lava and steaming ash on the surrounding district. Some authorities agree that the hills, which now are pleasure resorts, in former ages were 2,000 feet high, but have been cut off. ’ On many of the mountain tops are hidden lakes, believed to have at one time been craters. For a long period the peaks are believed to have been worn by water and weather, and the passing- ages found them greatly decreased In size. Then came the glacial period, and the movement of the stupendous sheets of ice Arom the northeast tore the mountains from their base, scraped many hundred of feet of earth from the rocks surrounding them, and transferred it farther south. The baked limestone alone withstood the onslaught, and although the softer rock was carried away, the lava beds remained and formed the present-day hills.

Japanese Lucky Numbers.

In Japan the telephone number eight commands a higher price from subscribers than any other. This number, written in Japanese character, means success and prosperity, and costs the subscriber who holds it nearly £IOO a year. Another lucky number is 357, for the reason that it Is the custom to-present children to the deity on their third, fifth and seventh birthdays. As a general rule odd numbers are considered luckier than even numbers. Numbers forty-two and fortynine are particularly unlucky In the eyes of the Japanese. The former is pronounced . “shini," which means death; the latter “shllju,” meaning .distress and suffering. These numbers are carefully avoided by subscribers, and are usually allotted to police stations, aslyums and similar institutions. —London Tit-Bits.

Point of View.

Flatbush—l see by the papers that there is a great shortage of coal. Bensonhurst—What of it? There are worse things than that. “What, frinstance?” “Why, they say there Is a great shortage of moving picture houses, and a movement Is on foot to furnish the world with 10,000 more.”

k&' I- 7 ■ Jtw” ■ * 7" 111 " IJ " """" WRIGLEYS 5C a Package * before the war H I a package > during the war ■ nowß The Flavor Lasts So Does the Price! Ji3 s ins

Sign of Prosperity.

“So You regard the advance In railroad rates as a sign of prosperity?” * “Assuredly,” answered Mr. Dustin Stax. “A public that can afford to meet the new charges cannot possibly be other than prosperous!.”

EATONIC Users —Do This —Get the Greatest Benefits Chicago, Dl.—Thousands of reports from people all over the U. 8. who have tested eatonic, show the greatest benefits are obtained by using it for a few weeks, taking one or two tablets after each meat Eatonic users know that it stops Belching, Bloating, Heartburn, and Stomach Miseries quickly, but the really lasting benefits are obtained by using eatonic long enough to take the harmful excess acids and gases entirely out of the system. This requires a little time, for eatonic takes up the excess acidity and poisons and carries them out of the body and of course, when it is all removed, the sufferer gets well, feels fine—full of life and pep. If you have been taking an eatonic now and then, be sure and take it regularly for a time and obtain aU of these wonderful benefits. Please speak to your druggist about this, so that he can tell others that need this help. Adv.

Just So.

“Can you give me an outside room?" "I can give you a hammock in the alley or a cot In the yard.” said the hotel proprietor. "I see. Ail outside rooms."

The Cuticura Toilet Trio. Haring cleared your skin keep It clear by making Cuticura your every-day toilet preparations. The soap to cleanse i and purify, the Ointment to soothe and | heal, the Talcum to powder and perfume. No toilet table is complete without them. 25c everywhere.—Adv.

Imagination Staggers.

“Why did they separate?" "Nobody knows.” “How dreadful.” — Boston Transcript

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Marital Spite.

*Td like to see my wife go to the polls to vote.” “Are you so much opposed to suffrage?” “It Isn’t that, but rd like to enjoy hearing her called down good and hard for not knowing how to fold her ballot.”

The difference between Solomon and the modern poet Is that he was able to support a large family. Every man has his worthless days, but If he does not fight them every day will become his worthless day. * The man who doesn’t know a woman until he marries her is apt to regret the acquaintance. " 1 Tse—sasSßSHß 1 —I Watch Your Kidneys! That “bad back" is probably due to I — M L. kidnMa TA ahaara a I weax moneys, it snows in a auu, I t hrobbing backache, orahmptwingei I too dizzy spefis a tired nervous feeling I and irregular kidney action. Don t neg* I lec is danger of dropsy, gravel I the timely use of Doan’s. Ask your I . ... "■ . I An UHimms Casa I I sharp I I il ’tb.LgSjKvE ney Pills and eight boxes entirely cured ma.* Get Dossil st Any Stove, SOe a Bas DOAN’S VM-LV FOSTER-MILBURN CO„ BUFFALO, N. Y. TOO LAll£ AS- A- ■ '

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