Evening Republican, Volume 23, Number 157, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 30 June 1920 — ON THE FUNNY SIDE [ARTICLE+ILLUSTRATION]

ON THE FUNNY SIDE

THE LAST QUESTION. A lawyer was grilling the respondent in a divorce case. “Is it true that you are supporting another woman?” he asked. “It is,” replied the respondent. “And she lives in the same house, does she not?” “Yes.” “And you were never married to her?” “No, sir.” “That will be all.” “Just a moment,” broke in the man's attorney. “Who was this woman?” “My mother,” calmly replied the re-, spondent.

HE AGREED. “That remark that Mr. Gruff made tonight, about not being able to see how so intelligent a man could get married, was very impolite." “Well, Gruff doesn’t stand on formalities —he’s a great stickler for truth." Same as Now. In days of old when knights were bold And barons held their sway. They took their orders from their wives Just as men do today. Insult to Injury. Dora —I hear you were discharged from your position. Dick —Yes, but I wouldn’t mind that so much if they had not advertised for a boy to fill my place! -— Method in His Madness. Carter —Why do you have so many shoes? Corning —It’s a great relief; no two of them hurt in the same place. A Colored View. Sam—Dey say dat de parrot am one o’ de longest lived birds dere is. Rastus —Ah ’specks de reason fo’ dat am, he ain’t no good to eat. The Distinction. “Who is Mrs. Gaddy in mourning for?” “Nobody that I know of, but she is .s in black for her husband.”

Answered. “Why do they always have to get angels for plays?” “Because there Is the 'devil to pay if they don’t.” —r — Proof of It. “Officer, how did you know this man was really drunk?” “Because, your honor, I saw he was full of alcoholic content.”

>THEY DON’T COME BACK. “Just what is your husband’s ami Bition in life?” “He has none.” "Poor man, I suppose that is why he got married.” A Crop of Ivory. Her mouth was not so very large, Yet, in a confidential minute, She told the dentist that she had Three well-developed achers in itThe Element of the Practical. “Is Bliggins a student of political economy?” “No. He says that he’s a practical man, and practical politics and practical economy don’t mix.” The Danger. } Visitor —According to this newspaper, the war cost — Movie magnate—S-h-h! Visitor —What’s the matter? Movie magnate— l don’t want the star to hear any amount like that.— Film Fun. / incredulity. Fortune Teller —I see on the cards that you are going to be married. Fair Patron—l don’t understand bow you can see that on the cards when I haven’t ordered them yet.