Evening Republican, Volume 23, Number 34, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 7 February 1920 — THESE ARE SMILES [ARTICLE+ILLUSTRATION]

THESE ARE SMILES

Prediction Disproved. He (after popping the question)— Why are you crying, dearest? Did I offend you by my proposal? She —Oh, no, dear, it’s not that. I am crying from pure joy. Mother has always told me that I was such an idiot that I wouldn’t get even a donkey for jrsweetheart, and now I’ve got one after all.

Not Entirely Well.

"Doctor, how much do I owe you?” “Now, don’t start worrying over financial matters. You’re not strong enough to be told that yet,**

/ The Limit. Amateur Hunter —What if I should mistake you Tor a deer? Guide —If I’m more’n fifty yards away that'll be all right. But if I happen to be any closer I’ll come back and jolt you on the jaw. -

Just a Form of Speech. “I've got no use for that fellow.” “Is that a good reason for scorning him? Surely you don’t confine your acquaintance to people you expect to have some special use for.”

Vocational Names.

The Call —Are you known as Mrs. Freemeter, your husband’s pen name? The Poet’s Wise —No, I’m known as Mrs. Smith; that’s my washtub name.

Wouldn't Bite.

The Customer — I want to get a pair of merino socks. - The TTew —Merino? That must be splggoty .for marine. You can’t catch me on that gag. If I am a green clerk. Mexican marines don’t wear socks.

Too Serious.

Mrs. Cunningham—Love laughs at locksmiths, you know. Cunningham—Love has no business to laugh at anything.