Evening Republican, Volume 21, Number 212, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 16 September 1918 — The Sophomore Joke [ARTICLE]

The Sophomore Joke

By JANE OSBORN

(Copyright, IMS, by the McClura Newspaper Syndicate.) At the sophomore class balloting, after the students had rather easily disposed of such questions as “Who is the prettiest girl in the class?” “Who is the best football player?” “What is your favorite color?” and “What Is the height of your ambition?” the question “Who is the most popular professor in college?” was not so easily dismissed. There were several possible candidates, but no one stood in the light of a decided majority. Then one of the students got up in class meeting and with a gracious flourish cried: “I propose Prof. Reginald Raymond as the most popular member of the faculty.” And amid deafening peals of laughter from the members of the class a dozen shouts of “Second the motion” arose, and then “Aye!” “Aye 1” till the president’s gavel had to bring order. It was regarded as a capital joke—an uproariously funny joke. Perhaps no one in the world understands the richness of this particular sort of humor so well as a young American undergraduate, and a sophomore at that. But from the sophomore point of view it was something very much to be laughed at—that the professor who, because of certain traits of absentmindedness, Inattention, preoccupation and unsociableness, actually was the most unpopular man in the faculty, should have this fact gently brought home to him by seeing his name blazoned forth in college yearbook and periodical, and announced before all the world at class day, and whispered about by professors and professors’ wives, as the “most popular man on the faculty.” Apparently, from the peals of laughter that accompanied the casting of the unanimous ballot in favor of Professor Raymond, every member of the class appreciated the joke. But when Ruth Rodney, the secretary of the class, and, as the only officer of her sex in the class, generally agreed to be the most popular girl in its number, rose to read the result of the balloting and- came to the vote that mentioned Professor Raymond, there was a look of bitter resentment in. her expression, and from beneath her lowered eyes she shot a look that was not one of kindness at the student in the front row who had, pro-' posed the jest. “What was the matter, Ruth?” one of the girls asked her after class meeting. “You looked daggers at Steve. Did you want some one else to get the vote? Every one’ll know it’s a joke. Say, won’t Reggie snort when he hears of it?”

“Of course Professor Raymond will be offended,” said Ruth shortly. “But I don’t see that there is anything so funny about that. After all, he hasn’t done anything so very dreadful to our class, except to try and din a little philosophy into our unsophisticated heads. It isn’t his fault if college faculties are still obtuse enough to think that philosophy ought to be a compulsory sophomore subject, is it? And it isn’t his fault if he’s absentminded, and likes violet neckties, and if his eyes are so sensitive that he has to have the shades drawn in his classroom, is it?” “You know yourself he’s a frightful crab, Ruth,” was her companion’s conclusion. “Really, for my part 1 think it is a beautiful joke. I’m just crazy for tomorrow’s philosophy lecture to see how mad he is about it.” But the next morning a surprise was in store for the sophomore class. Naturally enough, Professor Raymond had heard of the polling, for even absentminded professors usually do take a lively interest in matters of that sort. Instead of showing his annoyance, he appeared in his class-room with an unwonted smile upon his face. » With that began the second joke, or, as the students soon thought, the best joke of all.

“The poor crab doesn’t know he Is being kidded!” whispered one sophomore in the front row to another, and after class there were groups of students still explaining to each other how intensely funny the situation was, now that poor Reggie believed he actually was the most popular man in college. That became the standing joke of the campus; Mothers and fathers and younger sisters and brothers, when they came to visit their students, had the shambling, near-sighted professor, who always wore a violet necktie, pointed out as the deluded creature who really thought he was popular with the students, and even staid members of the faculty had a little fun with each other at poor Reginald’s expense. Ruth still saw no joke in the situation. In fact, the very serenity of the professor made her feel the insult that her class had heaped upon him the more. It was in pity then, and in an effort to show her classmates that she did not join them in their practical joking, that she made it a point to linger occasionally after class, on some excuse or other, to talk to him. She wanted the students it, and she felt actual pleasure sometimes in having him overtake her on the campus, take long walks with him through the roads that led off into the country. “Just imagine how mortified he win feel when he finds out that it has been just a joke,” Rath told her classmates

on one of the last occasions when she reproved them for their thoughtlessness, and she was only assured by the thoughtless ones that “Reggie was too dense to find out.”

\ It was "known that in faculty gatherings reference was sometimes made to “our popular professor,” and on such occasions Professor Raymond always beamed his utter satisfaction, much to the amusement of the other-members of the faculty.'

From those long walks developed friendship, and from friendship dependence, and then love, and before spring had come Ruth and Professor Raymond were engaged, and when college opened the next year they were married and nicely established in one of the new brick terraced little cottages on the Gampus, with an evening “at home” to the students every week, and special suppers and teas on frequent occasions to the class to which Ruth had belonged—the class which had paid the renowned honor to Professor Raymond. • First it was noticed that the professor left off purple neckties, and chose in their place those of brown and dark blue and gray. He must have consulted a new oculist, for before long he never bothered with having the shades in his classroom drawn. Then students began to notice that when he passed them on the campus, Instead of shuffling by them with the look of Diogenes in search of an honest man, he always met them with a cordial smile, and sometimes found pretext to stop them and pass the time of day with them. At his home were really the most successful “at homes” on the campus.

To be sure, Ruth’s delicious sandwiches and chocolate topped with whipped cream may have been the at traction, but it was not only the stu dents, who attended parties in general, only for “the eats,” who made a point of attending the Raymond “at homes.” Professor Raymond always somehow seemed to get a laugh out of the most self-conscious and awkward of his student guests, and he seemed to realize that once you have made a student laugh with you, you have convinced him that you and he are on a friendly footing, and not separated by the chasm that lies between faculty and student body. Another summer passed, and when the class to which Ruth had belonged returned to their senior year there was another balloting. The results plainly showed that students change in some ways from sophomore to senior year. The honors of pulchritude had passed from the sophomore belle to another girl who had not even been noticed two years before; the favorite color was now crimson Instead of violet, and there were more students whose ambition now was to become a millionaire ‘ than in the year when the vote of the class went in favor of “Writing a masterpiece bf literature.” But again the vote for popularity went to Professor Raymond. On'this occasion, however, there were no peals of laughter when the unanimous ballot was cast. On the contrary there was a solemn, almost contrite expression on the faces of the students as they voted, and a formal letter telling the professor of his election was sent to him, together with the announcement that he had been elected honorary member of the class. When the professor opened the letter Ruth was sitting beside him in his study, and there were tears of happiness ill her eyes as she read the announcement it, contained. “I knew they would-re-elect you,” she said, with an effort at unconcernedness. Reginald Raymond put out two strong hands and pressed both of Ruth’s hands in them. ""Don’t - you know,” he asked, “that I understand that you have won this for me? Could I have been so blind as not to see? I knew they despised me,” he said, with a relic of the old bitterness, “and no man ever longed so for student friendship as I did. And you came to show me how to win it” “But —but you acted —we thought that you believed it —that you didn’t see the abominable joke.” “That was my little joke on the class, Ruth, dear. And after those first weeks of mortification about it I decided that my ambition was first to win your love, and then to win that which has come to me today.”