Evening Republican, Volume 21, Number 96, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 1 May 1918 — SHEETS [ARTICLE]

SHEETS

Sheets are what a heavy rain Is said ,1m come down in. Also “they are what a drunken man is said to have three of in the wind. Incidentally, they are used on beds, in-numbers ranging from one to two per bed.' There are cotton bed sheets and linen bed sheets and hotel bed sheets. In some states the hotel sheets ars required to be nine feet long. In some states they are not, but the patron of the hotel knows, even if his sheet is only five and a half feet in length, it will be long enough before there is another clean one on the bed. I have seen hotel sheets in all states. A bed sheet folded and lying on the shelf of a linen closet or in a laundry bag is about as quiet and well behaved an article as one could wish to see. 1 "V • One would never guess from its downcast eye and.general decorous Air that it had latent devilment in it. But that same sheet, if you get into bed with it on top of you after a roastpork or mince-pie supper, develops the most Douglasfairbanks disposition imaginable. While you lie quietly beneath it, It will yank itself loose from its moorings at the foot of the bed and roll itself into a rope and leap violently from beneath the outer covers to lie writhing on top of the spread. Just before you wake from a long and fruitless fight with It, it quiets down and swears it never moved throughout the entire night. The activity of a sheet under such circumstances Is greatly augmented if one is sleeping with a little boy who also ate mince pie. Under such circumstances I have known the sheet to be hanging from the chandelier by 4 a. m.—Strickland Gillilan, in Farm Life.