Evening Republican, Volume 21, Number 171, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 6 August 1917 — GOOG JOKES [ARTICLE+ILLUSTRATION]

GOOG JOKES

How She Felt.

Mrs. Higgins— And so you have secured your divorce, I hear? Mrs. Wiggins — Yes, I’m glad to say that I have. Mrs. Higgins— How did you feel when you heard the judge’s decision? ■ Mys. Wiggins— Well, I felt sort of unmanned, as it were.

t _ • His Decision. “I have been In your train a long time now.” “I can’t marry yon,” said the girl. “All right. Here’s where I change cart/then.” A Failure Confessed. “You said I would never want for anything if I married you,” she pouted. “Quite true, my dear... lAy idea was to cure you of wanting things, but I haven’t succeeded.” Best He Could Do. “My hair is coming out,” said a man. to h|s doctor. “Please give me something to keep it in." “Well,” said the doctor, •‘here’s an old pillbox. Will that do?”

Why, Indeed? Doctor —Do you suffer from headaches? ' Patient —Certainly I suffer. ,If I enjoyed them I wouldn’t have consulted ymi. • Unpoetic, Tom—Do you know I envy the birds? Bess—Yes; they’re so gay and free —fly here and —” Tom —Yes, and have only one bill the year round.

How Could He Tell?

Head of Finn — How long do you want to be away on your wedding trip? Hawkins (timidly)—Well, sir—er what would you say ? Head of Flrm-r-How do I know? I haven’t seen the bride.

Easily Detected. “Smith could never misrepresent his goods, for such a. trick could be easily seen through.” “What kinds of goods does he sell?* “Window glass.” *