Evening Republican, Volume 59, Number 75, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 30 March 1917 — WROTE CONTRACT FOR COOK [ARTICLE]

WROTE CONTRACT FOR COOK

Shyster Lawyer's Plan to Retain Help All Right Until Marie Heard About It. life wife of the shyster lawyer was worried. “Darling,” she said, J’wesl niply-cai> -ntffkeep a cook. We’ve had three this week and a new one Is coming tonight.” ■ —— — —-- 7 ~ “Ah,” said the shyster and ainbu--1 ancg-chaser, “you are- lax in your methods. Each cook should sign a contract, and, once signed—ahem! They cannot leave I Now, I’ll write out a tractcon —I mean a contract, and have the new cook sign it. And there, you are I” On the stroke of 6:30 Marie Antoinette McCarthy, the new German cook, weighing 238 pounds, arrived. The shyster lawyer approached her carefully with a baseball bat.

“1 have a contract for you to sign before you go to work. I’ll read.it: “ ‘The party of the firstpart, Marie A. McCarthy does hereby agree to cook, wash, iron, mend clothes, do dishes, sweeping and dusting for the Irttrty of the seCond part for one yea r from date. And the party of the first part agrees in part with the party of the second part to take part in any extra dinners planned by the party of the second part. And whereas the party of the firstpart.thusly— Here the shyster was struck on the head by a milk bottle and thrown down the cellar stairs.