Evening Republican, Volume 21, Number 65, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 19 March 1917 — The Immigrant. [ARTICLE]

The Immigrant.

Once these was a Swiss named Jake Sneezeki who became dissatisfied with conditions in his native country and came to the United States, which he had heard was' a land flowing with milk and money. —Jake had been told one couldlive in the United States without working, but though he saw others doing it he did not learn the secret until he met a fellow countryman, Izzy Itch. “Mr., Itch,” he said, “I’m starving to death. Tm afraid I’ll have to go ti work.” < * , “Oh, don’t • give up I” replied Mi Itch. “I? you will answer my que.*» tions, perhaps I can help you. How much money have you?” “None at all.” “How much property?” "“None.” “Haye you ever had money or property 7’ ■ “U" .■ — “Why, then, it’s simple.” and Mr. Itch whispe'red in Jake’s ear. So Jake went into business as a bondsman. —Ring W. Lardner in Chicago Tribune;