Evening Republican, Volume 21, Number 44, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 22 February 1917 — “Canned” Telegrams, All Ready for the Wire, New Boon for the Busy Man [ARTICLE]

“Canned” Telegrams, All Ready for the Wire, New Boon for the Busy Man

Hereafter when the busy citizen enters a telegraph office to comply with the twentieth century" rule H * the sooner the thing is done the -tter, he will not have to go through the agony of saying much in 10 words or 20, nor will he have to knit his brows and lose valuable time putting what" he knows he wishes to say into actual words His case has been attended to by the same kind of genius that evolved the complete letter writer of other days. The new i nventionJs the complete telegram writer, remarks the Indianapolis News. It is well stocked with, all kinds,of telegrams, long and short, sorrowful and gay, , witty and dull. For the person who believes In going straight to the point there is the outspoken “Best wishes for a happy New Year.” There is nothing new about this greeting, nor does it mean anything in particular, except that the, sender has thoughtfully remembered someone. The very conservative person who dislikes plain statements will naturally turn away from the unmistakable meaning of this greeting. He will want something more pompous, and being a conservative, it is likely that he can pay for it. He will therefore select, “What the coming_year_ may hold we can none of us foresee. It is my earnest wish that for you it may bring forth a generous harvest of happiness and good fortune.” This statement is open to any construction the recipient happens to care to put upon it. In addition to 26 varieties of New Year’s greeting and 8?- varieties of Christinas greetings,"Tßere are model messages for many occasions. Easter, Thanksgiving, birthdays, births of babies, graduation, weddings, deaths, etc. The sender is relieved of almost the entire burden of saying what he has to say. He has merely to run through the book until he finds what he expects to say, check it off, pass the money and an address and signature on to the company, and his work is done. Thus is life simplified. The trouble is that some persons may have difficulty finding friends to fit the canned greetings, but in that case perhaps someone will find a way to make friends to order. . A New York inventor has obtained a 27-foot motorboat whichdraws only seven Inches of water when empty and three inches more when loaded to capacity. This draft includes the propeller blades, which aie housed amidships. . ’