Evening Republican, Volume 20, Number 24, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 28 January 1916 — Ed Thackerisms Copped From the Monticello Journal. [ARTICLE]

Ed Thackerisms Copped From the Monticello Journal.

Only those who take a second, third or fourth shot at the marriage game know what it really means to fail to profit by experience. Isn’t it a shame how much presidential timber there is produced in the country that fails to mature? Lampshade stockings is the latest nutty idea in femine apparel. First thing we know they’ll be wearing those pretty little stovepipe collars for ankle bracelets. If Paul Revere, PhiV Sheridan and other horseback heroes had only had motor cars there wouldn’t have been anything to it. We should think the hens would feel deep regret for their wasted opportunities every time they see a broken egg shell that cost somebody a jitney. When a girl spends a half hour next morning after a dance painting up her white slippers that have been badly trodden upon, she is hard to cpnvince that dancing is the poetry of motion. Our corns predict a change of weather of some sort, and our pocketbook hopes it won’t call for another consignment of coal. Some preachers (not in Monticello) put in six days of the week wondering what their congregations will stand for.