Evening Republican, Volume 18, Number 284, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 2 December 1914 — Page 3

MULVEY THE MACER

By CLARENCE L. CULLEN.

Mulvey the Macer, not being a member of the Panhandlers’ union, ■works his independent or open-shop panhandling route anywhere in Broadway between Madison square and Longacre square. In one of the intersecting streets he was in the tranquil if loquacious enjoyment of an evening of rest and relaxation at his Tenth avenue hangout, a maltorium where the hops flagons are high hats and hard-stuff measures are short-handled dippers. He greeted me cordially and hospitably.

“I read that t’ing o’ your’n in the Horseback magazine—ye-eh, I gotcha, The Cav-leer—about the macin’ game,” said he, a certain note of deprecation In his tone. “All I gotta say about that piece is this: It was and Jt wasn’t, ■jv’iclt is long fr yes and no. “Y’ don’t wanta lis'n to these panners that blurt that this town is goin’ bad. I ain’t sayin’, un’stand, that the macin’ t’ing is what it useta be here. But It's still wort’ Vile if you know how to duck the bulls and are hep to Character-readin’. Them’s the two main wires: Flaggin’ the rough-necks and knowin’ how to slant up the right marks to brace. “O’ course the first t’ing a macer’s got to remember that expects to have the price of-all the suds he can lick UP when he knocks off woik is to keep from gittln’ the souse on when he’s operatin’ his beat. £bis is hard, o’ course; but it’s gotta be done by a panner that wants to make a success o’ pannin’. * ' v “Y’see, the souse can. be put off till after sundown, and it’ll be all the better after you’ve waited for it. Jes’ take a peek at the fun I’m havin’ wit’ meself right now, f’r instance,” and Mulvey the Macer staked himself to another dipperful of the “fine old mellow bourbon, onlffiive cents,” as the large placard on the barrel proclaimed It to be, and tossed the heavy shot Into his system without the use of water or any other ameliorating fluid as a chaser, with every evidence of extreme relish. “As I’m chatterin’,” he went, on, “that’s the first gag f’r the macer that act’ally expects to succeed —to hold off on his package till his woik’a been done and all the loose duff’s been picked up and pouched. "The idee is, y’ get me, there’s a lot o’ folks that objec’ to diggin’ up to a macer that lboks like he wants to lean again’ a lamp-post of a’ awnin’ pole while he chirps f’r the change. I don’t know why they should objec’, but a lot o’ them do, aB I’m sayin’. *

“Different tnacers has got different ldees about the kind o’ people that’s the best perducers. F’r mine, I alius make it a point to brace the big stlfts. The little terriers ain’t diggers gen’ally. The sawed-off stift nearly alius wheels on the macer and calls him a hum apd gits the clutch on his cane and swells out his 26-inch chest and

turns back his head and tries to make hisself look like the picture o’ the bantam champeen. It don’t make no difference what kind of a ditty the panner slips the little man in the way o’ a spiel, it’s alius or nearly alius the same. He gits the hoof. “The big stifts f’r mine, all the time, as I’m sayin’, and the kind wit’ the swell scenery. I alius pick out a swinger that pounds along as If he’s got a mortgage on the pavement and swaggers like a man-o’-wars-man at “ the beginnin’ o’ a four-day pickle. Y’ can alius dope it that a heavybreezer like this has got the change right in the little side kick', and that he likes to hear what a warm rag he is.

44 ‘Maje,’ says I to one o’ that kind, ‘youse looks like youse can chuck a mlnnit’s time to- lls’n to the chirp o’ distress of a poor bloke that’B hit the coral reef,' and then I sort o’ slant his raiment over wit’ envy in me wicks. - 44 1 f he mooches right on, sayin’, ‘on your way, bo, before I swing on youse f’r luck,’ I fall In half step behind him and hurl him that one about my onct bein’ able to flash the same kind o’ swellerino togs that he’s makin’ such a hit wit’. That gen’ally snags the big stifts. They pretend that they’re not listenin’, but they’re lappin’ It in all right, and then all you’ve gotta do is to keep up that line o’ hunk, slippin’ in one or two about benev’lent count’nances and prosp’rous, charitable looks, and all the like o’ that, and nine times outa ten you’ll see the big stiffs mitt makin’ fr the change-kick in his tunic. “W’lle he’s goto’ f’r the chunk o’ change you wanta nudge in that one about Lis lookin’ as if he’d never had a day’s bum luck in his life, and then he’ll come back:

44 ‘Don’t you ever git that idea in your bean —you don’t know what hard luck means.’ “I don’t know w’y it is that ev’ry guy in the swell push, w’ether he was born wit’ the-gilt fork in his chops or not, and that never was hungry of f irsty f’r a minnit in his life, likes to make hlsself and others fink that he’s had about half o’ all the hard wallops that ever was dished out since the beginnin’ o’ ,-the world. "’Don’t youse never fink I ain’t been over the jumps hardefn youse aver dreamed of, bo,’ the big easy atift wit’ the joy togs on will say, and w’en he hands you that his piece o’ change is jee’ as good as salted In y’r nankeens. “Out o’ course they’g different kinds

o’ big stifts. If, fr instance, w’en you brace the big boob with the money tailorin’ he hands youae the merry twlnk outa his windows and tells youse he neieds all the booze coin he can earn fr his own low appetites, tfeen 5 it’s youse to slip him the candid sfjleL -»■

' well, I see youse is nex*, judge,’ says I to that kind, ‘and youse is the kind of a man that can symp’thize wit’ a bum that ain’t lifted the price o’ a hooter f r two days—not o’ course that youse was ever in that bad a fix y’rself,’ says I. ) "‘Oh, I wasn’t, hey?’ the mark nearly alius rebates when I give him that, and he gits to musin’, as he plods along—and me not far behind him —about the times w’en he’s been marooned in a prohibition town som&whereß w’ere he couldn’t spring a ball, and that nearly alius makes him skate to the center wit’ the price. ‘Tve had boobs like that, in slippln’ me the kale, say: ‘Look a here, youse, if ever I hear o’ youse buyin’ grub wit’ that, or doin’ anythin’ else wit’ it ’ceptin’ gettin’ as much nose-paint f r it as it’s good fr, I’ll have yoose sloughed,’ meanin’ pinched- " But at that we can’t alius pick ’em right. ‘A w’ile back I gits it right on topa the bean from one o’ them big breezers. ,He was swingin’ along the big trail, 'long atJout time f’r me to knock off —I only woiks till dark, see —and, as he has one o’ them good-na-tured buns wit’ him, says I to meself, ‘There’s two bits walkin’ on two legs.’ “So I eases him the chirp ’bout my needin’ jes one to make me t’ink life’s wort’ livin’, and he stops and hands me such a beamin’ grin that the two bits looks as good as wheat in the bin. “‘So youse needs Jes’ one pooty bad, hey, chum?’ says the big etlft, jammin’ his mitt into the side kick of his coat. “ ‘Never badder since I made me big entrance, maje,* says I, and it looked so soft that I was hopin’ maybe. he wouldn’t have anythin’ on him smaller’n four bits.

“ ‘T’ink Jes’ one 'ud help youse a hull lot, hey?’ says the toppy stlft with the grinnin’ pickle on, pullin’ out a hull handful o’ the bright two and four bit pieces and runnln’ ’em over wit’ his lamp. ‘“‘Guv’nor,’ says I, ‘lt’s almost a matter o’ life and deat’ wit’ me.’

“ ‘Me poor, * unfortnit feller man,’ says he then, suddenly cuttin’ out the grin and puttin’ on the undertaker’s map, ‘yours is indeed a sad, sad story, and the bowl, I fear me, has been the roon 0’ youse. Here’ take this, and read it carefully; it’ll cheer youse up.’ “Wot d’ye t'ink it was he handed me wit’ his left fin as he put the change that he had in his right bad. in the kale kick? I hope to be nibbled to deat’ by rabbits if it wasn’t the ‘Annual Report o’ the Methodist Missions in Africa.’ Jes’ eases it to me, the big stift, and trudges on, and me watchin’ his shoulders shakin’.

“Macin’ the skfrts is a different gag altogether. Whmi youse Bets out to stick up the calicoes in the shoppln’ distric’ youse is got to switch the cut all aroun’. Youse don’t wanta stack up ag’ln’ the big, strappin’, coineylookin’ skirts at all. They won’t do f’r any part o’ the journey, and they're li’ble to follow youse fr four blocks to put one o’ the biddies wit’ a badge nex’ to youse. ,

“Nothin’ like that stuff fr mine. In playin’ the calicoes along youse wants pick out the quiet-dressed, unassum-in’-lookin’ little fringes that ain’t got no strut'about ’em at all, and that walk sort o’ wit’ their han’s in front of ’em, ol’-fashioned like, and their lamps on the ground.” v

Vital Point.

Mr. Porter’s judgment was vindicated. “Ah, ha,” he exclaimed triumphantly, “do you remember that little magnifying glass I gave a dollar for the other day? You said it was a clear waste of money. Well, it has more than paid for itself already.” , “How so?” Inquired Mrs. Porter. "It detected a counterfeit $2 bill to which I had the presence of mind to apply it. Those bills are so well executed that even the experts can hardly tell them from the genuine, but my little magnifying glass brought out all its defects.”

“How clever you are,” Bald Mrs. Porter. “to think of, examining money with a magnifying glass. Now you can make tne person who gave you the bill take it back. Who did give it to you anyway?” Mr. Porter’s jaw fell. "By George!” he said, "I don't remember.” /

Auto Not Safe In Thunder Storm.

Let anyone who believes he is perfectly safe in a motor car during a thunderstorm, because the rubber tires are an effective bar to the passage of the electrical discharge, try the following experiment, if he dare: Standing on beside the car, with its motor running, place a finger on the top of the spark plug. He will not have to wait long for results! As the Scientific American remarks, the high tension current readily finds a path to the ground, regardless of the tires. Why should not a bolt of find a similar path?

I Domestic Loyalty.

“What you want to do,”, said the health expert, “is to sleep with the windows wide open, regardless of the temperature.” “And let a frost sneak in and kill the rubber tree!” exclaimed Mr. Meekton. “No, sir!« My life is dear to me. but my home is even mors so.”— Washington Btar.

THE EVENING REPUBLICAN, RENSSELAER, IND.

BURIAL OF ENGLISH SAILORS

Scene at the burial of forty-three English sailors whose bodies drifted ashore at Gravenzande (Hook of Holland). The men were members of the crews of the Greasy and other British vessels sunk by the Germans.

PHANTOM BATTLE IN AIR MARKS DIRIGIBLE'S END

Mow “Republique" Went to Her End Graphically Described by Writer.

BOMBS DROP FROM CLOUDS

Terror-Stricken Citizens See French Machine Burst Into Flames After Spectacular Fight, Then Go Out In Dkrkneaa and Night.

The following word picture portraying a phantom night battle between airships, and the terror of a municipality under an aerial bomb attack, comes from Berlin, although it was written on the scene described herein. Owing to the strict European censorship, however, the coirespondent was not permitted to give the name of the town about Which he writes so graphically.

Berlin.—The little French town la lying asleep. It can do bo in safety, because the patrols are awake. But on the other side of the mountain there is no sleep. The place is humming like a beehive. But there Is perfect order. Every one is at his place. They are preparing for the march. Patrols have returned with the report that the plain is free from the enemy. The little town Is the place they mean to march to. They think the empty. The fact that the French had come in had not been made known. They came out of the foreßt, through which they marched during the night; and early in the morning they marched in, hidden by the vineyards. Now the town is a small camp. Every house a fortress. The superior officers have taken up their quarters In the city hall. AH lights are out The mayor asks: “Why?” ' He is told: * “Because the Germans have airships” The mayor makes the sign of the cross. He-has heard of the Zeppelin. “But we also have airships,” the mayor says.

The French captain nods: "One of them will go up this night. It will fly over- the hills to visit them over there.”

At night the officers are entertained by the town. All townfolks of distinction are present. The notary makes a passionate speech about the brave army. The colonel thanks him in the name of his comrades. He speaks highly of the town and its hospitality.

Two hours later, only the men on guard are still on their legs. But the mayor did not go to bed; also, the clergymen and notary are waiting. What for? For the Republique. > This is the famous aeroplane of which the captain spoke. <- Night Dark and Windy.

The sky is dark and overcast with thick clouds. Only from time to time be dim light of the moon steals through these dense masses. But quickly it grows dark again. The wind whistles through the forest and through the vineyards into the town, banging shutters and doors. Where is the Republique? The townsfolk have been waiting now fbr an hour, with' their eyes fixed on the dark sky—but nothing—nothing. Now they hear a peculiar noise resounding through the darkness from above. They stretch their necks. But their eyes are unable to penetrate the darkness. They listen intently. The humming and buzzing become more distinct It sounds $s if a glgantlo bird were rapidly moving forward on his wings. Now they see something—or do they only believe they see it?—floating thrpugh the air like a torpedo. The French mayor would like -to shout for joy. “Vive la Republique!" „ " Now the buzzing has turned into rattling and crackling. It seems to the mayor as if he saw small lights, flickering, extinguishing and flaring up again. Now all has disappeared again in the darkness; only the bus-

sing still is heard —the heavy stroke of the wings of the gigantic bird.

But behind the mountain the Germans are on the lookout The guards at the aviation post don’t know sleep. The eyes of the officer at the telegraph are as bright now as at noon. Now a spark and the writing lever splutters dashes —dots. He has sighted the Republique! A shrill whistled signal gives the alarm in the station.

The Republique must not pass over the mountain. They will try to catch her or drive her back at least. Brief commands are given—precise instruction#, A few minutes later a heavy biplane stands ready to start ’ A short examination of the wires and supports, then the pilot and observer take their places. The motor is started, the apparatus staggers in wid& jumps over the ground, and suddenly it shoots up with a last powerful pull. It. disappears into the dark. The compass needle shows the way. They fly higher and higher; the ridges of the mountain become visible as a long, dark strip. Now/ the biplane passes over them in smooth flight It keeps in the dark. The wind Mowb against it The apparatus goes still higher. ' Now the moon breaks through the clouds for a moment, giving a quickly disappearing track of light, enough to show the Republique at a distance.

The enemy is discovered. Now caution and courage are needed. Perhaps the French airmen have likewise seen the German. Then there will be a life and death struggle. But as a matter of fact the Republique has no warning of the approach of the German biplane, which is flying as wist as an arrow, going higher and ever faster. Like two birds of prey swooping upon one another they come. The biplane is more easily handled. The-ob-server looks into the darkness with sharp eyes; the apparatus moves forward in roaring and rushing flight Where Is the. Republique? Hurls Bombs on Town. jo Another hour passes. Then the German biplane is directed earthward. Below lies the little town like a dot. The apparatus descends lower and lower. The searchlight sends a flash over the ground like lightning. The mayor, who has not yet gone to bed, hastens to the window. Another flash of light. He looks up, sees only a shadow. But they in the aeroplane have seen enough—men and guns. And now something falls down from the height, like a stone, noli aimed, but yet a hit. The missile' bursts, a fire sheaf throws up sparks, splinters, cracking. The mayor starts back, thunderstruck, cries, rushes out Flames break out on the market; more cries; walls fall into ruins; the people are bewildered. Soldiers receive commands. Now shots go whizzing up toward the German biplane. j Another bomb is thrown to the ground, causing death and destruction, and leaving paralyzing horror.' The German biplane, however, has disappeared in the aerial ocean. It is in full flight. It tries to come up witn the Republique. It ascends in a wide curve. Suddenly there is a buzzing noise before It. It must be the Frenchman. It seems that he got lost in the dark. A yell of triumph escapes the observer. The apparatus mounts quickly in a spiral curve. Indeed, it is the Republique!

The German airship Victoria now is like a hawk, measuring the distance. Now the searchlight plays, and it sends flashes of light over the Republique. Bombs are thrown. The observer watches them in the quick light One sinks into the night; another one also; but the third one makes a hit— It strikes the stern!

The Republique, unable to fly over the enemy, moves along with diminishing speed. Now the Victoria is preparing for the finishing stroke. It swoops down like an eagle, sure of its prey. The airship seems to stand on end. And now bomb after bomb drops down with almost mathematical exactness. The Republique groans and writhes from her gaping wounds. She is mortally hurt. The linen covering the wings hang about the rods like flesh cut to shred. Now it blazes up—a gigantic firework. Then the French airship goes out in darkness and night!

HER SON FIGHTS FOR BRITAIN

German Woman Encounters Lad by Chance in Railway Station in London.

London. —A well-known German woman, who is married to an Englishman, bad a curious experience in London . Her son, fifteen years old, is a cadet in a British naval school, and it was her intention to get her son and take him to Prance to study French.

/ She reached England in the first days of the mobilization. As she got out of her train at Victoria’ station she saw a procession of naval cadets pass along Yhe platform. She stopped one of the youngsters. “Are you not from the school?” she asked him. Upon his replying affirmatively, she asked what the. cadets were doing in London. ;"Why, we are being mobilized,” whs the reply.

“Mobilized! You are not going to the warships?” she'demanded. “That’s what they say." “Tell me, is Cadet X with you?" “1 believe he is on the other side of the station.”

The mother rushed oyer there and soon found her son. He and his fellows were about to -board an outgoing train, and she had only a few minutes to be with him. Then he left for a seaport, and .was put on a warship and commissioned a midshipman.

GANGRENE MICROBE IS FOUND

American Ambulance Service Surgeons In Prance Make Discovery of Greatest Importance.

Paris. —A microbe causing gangrene in bullet and shrapnel wounds has been discovered by Drs. James Scarlett and Georges Desjardins of the American ambulance service. Previously initial cultures all were impure, leading to the belief of scientists that the disease was caused not by a single germ, but by a combination of germs. After much research and experimentation on horses and guinea pigs, a single bacillus has been discovered and Isolated and the serum is being prepared by Dr. Henri Welsberg of the Pasteur institute. The discovery is expected In medical circles to have world-wide importance. The serum is being injected into patients on the battlefield In the parly stages of infection,'obviating amputar tions and preventing a great loss of life.

GERMANY IS ALWAYS READY

Chicago Man Relates an Incident llluatrating Germany's Preparedness for War.

Chicago.—Much has been said about the preparedness of the Germans for war. A Chicago man related this incident: More than two years ago a subordinate German officer of the army was showing an American some things about the German way of being always ready to mobolize. They came upon an army wagon fully loaded. Horseshoes were dangling from beneath the wagon. “Where are your horses?” asked the American. “For this particular wagon,” replied the German, “one of the horses is at John Smith’s farm, the other at the farm of John Jones. The shoes that you see here have been fitted to those two horses.”

GERMAN OFFICERS FEW NOW

Rules for Promotion From Ranks Are Modified to Make Up the Shortage.

Bordeaux. —O dispatch from Geneva to the Temps says that owing to the enormous losses in officers the German military authorities are now permitting the promotion of non-commis-sioned officers and even private soldiers who distinguish themselves in the face of the enemy to the rank of officer on the simple recommendation of a colonel and without the previous submission of the nomination, as heretofore, for the approbation of other officers of the regiment. This is supposed to he a concession of a democratic nature and is certain to be greatly disliked by the aristocratic caste officers.

SAVES SEVEN OF THE ENEMY

Wounded German Rescues Frenchmen and Becomes a Hero In the Hospital;

Paris.—“ Among the wounded men from the fighting on the Yser was a young German with a bloodless, intellectual face. His head was a mass of bandages. He had just been taken from a Red Cross train and placed tenderly in a bed in an improvised hospital. The nurses gathered around him; some of them in tears. 44 ‘He saved the Hyes of seven French soldiers.’ This, written on a blood-stained sheel of packing paper pinned upon a blanket, told that the young German was a hero. That was all the French ambulance men found time to tell us.”

Censor Leaves Headlines.

Paris.—After passing through the censor’s hands, the Intranslgeant appeared recently with headlines in the first column of an article on German trade-marks. The signature of (he writer, Leon Bailby. also appeared but the entire text of the story wa* missing. The column was slncpl? blank. .

HOME TOWN HELPS

KILLING THE COUNTRY TOWS

Prosperity of Small Communities Men* aced by the Operations of the Catalogue Houses.

At a recent oonypntion in Chicago a paper was read by Capt. D. F. Dolan i of Western, in which relationships of the farmer and the country merchant were taken up and thoroughly discussed with the end in view of thoroughly impressing the gathered hardware men with the necessity of meeting the tillers half way. The paper has had almost a nation-wide circulation since that meeting, and comments have been very profuse wherever the trade papers in which it was reproduced have been read. A few extracts from It are of Importance to the public generally and indicate what several hundred business men are thinking about at this very moment. These outline the woof of trade transactions between country and town and show that there is a pronounced interdependency between both which to result in prosperity of the state must be adhered to by each in the belief that he Is meeting the other fellow half way, and that the other la doing the same to him. The paper, in part, reads as follows:

“Our business fears are enhanced by the operations of the catalogue bouses. These become menaces besause If patronized to the exclusion of; the rural trade they will kill the country towns which are the source and center of the best things In American fife. The future of the catalogue bouses depends upon the attitude of the people toward them. Every community must have some trading facilities, a place where the people can bring their produce and get needed merchandise and staples in return.”

BEST FOR RUSTIC FENCES

Olive Wood Is the Material That Should Be Employed Wherever >* It Is Possible.

In building so-called rustle fences too free use is made of eucalyptus poles, wood that is too hopelessly straight for any rustic fence except of strictly formal design. One of the most satisfactory rough fences known to the City Beautiful man is made of olive wood. In design, coloring, and general harmony with its rustic surroundings and setting it is unsurpassed. Olive wood is an ideal material for any and all work of rustic character. On the oths# hand, eucalyptus poles are ideal for supports for bridges, as stout poles of this material may be had of great strength and of considerable length. Across such stringers cduld benailed a floor composed of smaller poles about two inches in diameter. Any superstructure deemed necessary could then be built of olive or Borne material less straight

London’s New Civic Ideal.

London university has taken up a modern position and given a lead to Oxford and Cambridge by appointing a professor of town planning. Realising the vast importance of the move, we asked the occupant of the new office, Stanley D. Adshead, for a few statements as to the lines upon which he will work. "You can’t study the shell without, the mollusk, or, at least, the flying inmate,” said Mr. Adshead. *The chair is particularly opportune. Of course, the school will go further than planning suburbs. As well as lecture courses for students, it has been suggested that/there should be courses of public lectures.” If this comes to pass, the general public wfll be able to keep abreast of expert opinion, and to take a practical and effective interest in the city’s welfare. —T. P.’s Weekly, London.

House Beds.

Every building should have a space for plants left close to the foundation. No cement pr other walks should be allowed within three feet if conditions will allow, and to new places this Is always possible. The angle formed by ground and building should be filled with plants apd an occasional vine should clamber over a corner or along a porch. The house should appear to rise out of a mass of shrubs and plants, as a gem rises above Its setting in Jewelry. No place has a proper finish without such provision for embellishment.

Bridegroom Forgot He Was Married.

Clark Conkltog tells of a man in Lyons who had long boarded at a restaurant, but finally there came a time when he was caught by the gracious smiles of a young woman. The wedding passed off just like any other wedding, but the next day being a very busy one for hubby, he forgot all about being married dinner time he entered the restaurant and took his seat at his accustomed place. It was not until be was half through with his dinner that the idea occurred to him that he was married and his wife probably had a dinner waiting for him at home. He arose hastily, went home and ate about twice as much as he ought to have eaten in order that his wife would not find oub bow forgetful he was. . 7,V:^ I, .