Evening Republican, Volume 18, Number 279, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 25 November 1914 — “NURSERY” HINTS. [ARTICLE]

“NURSERY” HINTS.

An Anxious Mother Gets Some Ad< vice That Sounds Heartless. An anxious mother determined to ring up the day nursery to ask for spme advice as to her child. The following conversation ensued. “I called for the nursery. Is this the nursery?” “Yes, ma’am.” « “I am so worried about my little. Rose.” , "Vat seems to be der madder?” “Oh, not so very much, perhaps, but just a general listlessness and lack of life.” “Ain’t growing rigid, eh?” “No, sir.” ( "Well, I vill tell you vat to do. aboud two inches from der limbs und—” You dake der scissors and cut oft “Wh-a-at?” “I say, dake der scissors und cut off about two inches from der limbs, und den turn der garten hose on it for about four hours in der morning— “Wha-arat?” And the receiver vibrated at her tone. “Turn der garten hose on for aboud four hours in der morning, und den pile a lot" of black dirt all around und sprinkle mlt insegt powter all ofer der top—-"Slr-r-r!” “Sphrlngle mlt insect powter all ofer der top. You know usually It is noddings but pugs dot —” “How dare you sir? What do you mean by such language to me!” “Noddings but pugs usually causes der troubles, and den you vant to vash der rose with a liquid breparatlons I has for sale here —” “Who in the world are you anyway?” “Gottfried Bluber, der florist.” “O-o-oh!” rather weakly. “Goodby.”