Evening Republican, Volume 18, Number 258, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 31 October 1914 — INTERESTING ITEMS FROM THE CITIES [ARTICLE+ILLUSTRATION]

INTERESTING ITEMS FROM THE CITIES

Taps Own Pay Envelope First Time in 27 Years BOSTON, MASS. —When John Gearon of Malden skidded to the altar 21 years ago he wore a veteran dress suit, had a small set piece in hta coat lapel, and did everything possible to make the incident appear like a wed-

ding, but when he was arraigned in court here, charged with nonsupport, he declared that something went wrong with the arrangements and he was sentenced to life by a quiet-ap-pearing clergyman. “I love my wife,” said Mr. Gearon, “but, oh, you kid, judge, I've led a life.” “No nonsense,” said the judge sternly. “Practically none,” answered Mr. Gearon, ignoring the reprimand. “My

only amusement has been solitaire, and as I lost one card in 1895 and another, the ace of diamonds, in June, 1908, it’s been very, very hard to make it come out properly. On* my birthday, in 1910, I made arrangements to buy a pack of cards for a nickel, but my wife used the range finder with a large soup tureen, and it scored as a shot, and made me crosseyed for a week.” “I don’t quite get you,” said the court patiently. "Do you mean that you have had no money ip twenty-seven years?” ■» “Let him answer that,” said Mrs. Gearon, sideswiping her little husband with an emphatic gesture, and causing him to bump his head against the bar of justice. “That’s just why he is in this court. Last week he came home with his pay envelope ripped open and 50 cents gone from it. Ask him what he did with that. Let him tell your honor the silly story about having a tooth bulled. The wretch!” Mr. Gearon moved aside as if fearing his wife would step on him. "Judge,” he said, “in twenty-seven years I have never opened my pay envelope until last Saturday. Along about four o’clock a nerve in my tooth exploded; my hair stood up like wire and my jaw swelled out so that I couldn’t put my hat on. When I got paid at six o’clock I was so dizzy I didn’t care what became of me, and I ripped my envelope and had a dentist pull out a tooth.” “Hold!” said the court, apparently in a daze. “I will continue this case. For some reason, I don’t seem to be able tc*qulte get it. I will consider it all until next Monday at ten o’clock, at which time I will give my decision.” > &