Evening Republican, Volume 18, Number 109, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 8 May 1914 — THE WOMAN WHO COMBINED TWO FIGURES [ARTICLE]

THE WOMAN WHO COMBINED TWO FIGURES

There was once a Woman who Wished to Make an Impression upon a Friend of her Brother. She had Observed that this Friend was Much Interested in a very Athletic Girl who Played Tennis extremely Well. And yet He seemed pleased Also with a Society Girl who did Nothing well But Dress Herself. “I will Combine Both these Methods,” thought the Woman, “and Win Out in a Short Time.” After a While her Brother, who was Observing her Tactics, called her to One Side and. Addressed her thus: “Allow me to Inform You,” said he, “that you are Making a Great Mistake. If you wish to Make a Success in the 'Tennis Line you will have to Dress more Loosely and be Willing to look a Lit tit Redder in the Face, because Otherwise you Cannot Play well. If, on the Other Hand, it is . your Object to Look Stunning, you must Wear a Tighter and a Longer Skirt and Not Dash abdpt so, which Spoils your Complexion. As it is, you are Thrown Out pt Both Classes.” This teaches us that you Cannot Skimp-your Skirt and Have it Too.