Evening Republican, Volume 18, Number 57, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 7 March 1914 — Page 2

TALES OF COTHAM AND OTHER CITIES

Harlem’s “Apartment Houses/’ Flats and Goats

NEW YORK. —Harlem is that portion of Manhattan island which is bounded on the north by New York Central freight yards. Van Cortland park, Yonkers and goats; on the south by the city New York, on the east by the

wood, sewage, dead dogs and cats, etc., washed upon the bank of the majectic ■ Hudson before referred to - ———— Harlem was once noted for its goats, which were about the most healthy and marketable of that species grown any place in the world. Of late, however. goats have given way to children despite the fact that proprietors of the justly famous “Harlem flats" usually object most strenuously to dogs, cats, parrots, automatic pianos and children. It should be mentioned that Harlem is more ttf&nnoted for its flats and “apartment houses." There is a difference between a flat and an "apartment house ” A flat house is one of those tomb-like buildings, so numerous in Harlem, where the rent does not exceed $25 per month. Also the flat house is usually occupied“by motormen, chauffeurs, street conductors, etc., whereas the “apartment house” is occupied by head waiters, police lieutenants, poets, writers, newspaper men, clerks, etc. There you get the social distinction: — The “apartment house” is, of course, equipped with an elevator. The word elevator Is used with trepidation, because frequently it doesn’t elevate. Most Harlem “appartment house” elevators are a trifle eccentric, and many of them are as liable to carry you down when you want to go up, as to carry you up when you want to go down. In charge of the elevator is invariably a West Indian “hall boy,” from Georgia or born in New York's “color belt.” The hall boy also runs the telephone switchboard. When you want to go down in the elevator, the hall boy is at the telephone switchboard. When you want to use the telephone from your "apartment and kitchenette,” the West Indian youth from Georgia is at the sixth floor in the elevator.

When a Duck Loves You It’s for a Life Time

ST. LOUIS, MO. —When an Indian runner duck becomes your friend he is your friend always. In time of trouble he will neither run nor duck, for he Is no Indian giver, and when his confidence is placed there it remains.

Briefly, he is some bird. In view of his constant qualities it is not strange that the other day when a case in which Indian marathon ducks were the issue came before Justice of the Peace Frank Healey, he lifted his robes to keep from tripping, stepped off the bench for a moment and allowed the case to rest with a jury of ducks. They acquitted themselves admirably.

The action was brought by Mrs. Frank Thomas, who sought to attach three Indian sprinting ducks which have for the last few months been in the keeping of Samuel Whitsell. Both Mrs. Thomas and Mr. Whitsell asserted that they rightfully owned the ducks, and unto the justice they told of the marvellous qualities of the Indian galloping duck, how he quacked and made his friends welcome and so on. Bith litigants told the justice that all they wanted was a chance to show how well ducks knew them. Justice Healey at this point became a negligible factor in the case. He told Mr. Whitsell and Mrs. Thomas that the depth and quantity of the quacks as each of them approached the crate would settle the matter for all time. They agreed. When Mrs. Thomas walked slowly toward the waddling jury the noise was amazing. The fat duck nearest the proceedings nearly sprained, his bill trying to indicate that he recalled her A long duck quacked a brass aria with gulping variations and the smallest of the three quacked something sounding like "Rock Me to Sleep, Mother." The justice coughed and prepared, to start lor his home. He paused to watch Mr. Whitsell, principally through courtesy. At this point the Indian Runner duck came into his own. If the three regarded Mrs. Thomas as a friend they looked upon Mr. Whitsell as a relative. Any one who was careless enough to miss the fall of Port Arthur will never be able to grasp the quality of the racket that shook the courtroom. And in a few moments Mr. Whitsell walked toward his home in the wake of the Indian running ducks, quacking, "Home, Sweet Home," as they ran.

Beau Night Is Observed in Philadelphia Church

PHILADELPHIA. —“Beau night” was the unique but official title of a t-ocial gathering at the Cohocksink Presbyterian church, Franklin street and Columbia avenue, the other night. Fifteen couples of the neighborhood,

Cbess and checker tables were scattered over the room and a piano filled with popular music occupied one corner. PosteA-at the door were Mrs. Beulah Ridge and Miss Arita Elizabeth Copp, chaperons, who introduced new couples and saw that they were properly entered in the games. The eight side rooms of the big ehapel were also throw’ll open—These, it was explained, are to be used by couples who desire more seclusion. “What we have done is this," said Dr. Zed Hetzel Copp, pastor of the church. "We have advertised that girls who are adrift in the city or any other girl who has no place to entertain a man she would like to get better acquainted with, may come here every Friday evening, and meet him in a sane and normal fashion.” . —-r-

High Cost of Living. Cuts Down Porter’s Tips

CHICAGO. —Manet, Reese is going on the trail of the absent tip. Mance wields a whisk broom ana a blacking brush as a porter in a barber shop. He says that the anti-tipping crusade has gained such strength that it is almost

next to impossible for him to support his family. At least this is the expla nation he gave when arraigned -before Municipal Judge Uhlir in the court of domestic relations on a charge of failure to support his .wife, Mattie, and his two-year-old son, Clarence. "This porterlng business “isn't what, is used to be, judge,” he said. “Everybody has joined this anti-tjpping crusade. Tije customers hold on to their

dimes tighter than they used to because the high cost of living has crowded the barber shop porter clean off the map. Tt porteringis a legitimate business then it should erttail more wages. If it isn’t a business, then L haven't been working.” ”1 guess that’s the trouble with you,” said the court. "You haven't been working. You're too lazy to earn the >9 a week you say is your wages.” “You can't work, judge, unless you’ve got a customer to work. The customers nowadays grab their hats and coat and get out of the shop before you whisk the broom within, a yard of them. You know they don’t tip any more, judge, because you don’t do it yourself.” ,”You are wrong.” replied Judge Uhlir. "I always tip the porter when h< bruaheama properly. This is the third time you've been up before me lor fail uro to support your wife. I’ll give you one more chance to pay your wife | a week or out to the bridewell you go.”

magnificent East river, with its artistic conglomeration of coal barges, garbage scows and sewer outlets, and on the west by the majestic Hudson and Riverside drive, together with the New York Central's freight tracks. Sometimes you can't see ti|e Hudson from Riverside drive, but if you wait long enough, maybe the New York Central will move its freight and cattlecars and allow you to see the drift

mainly residents in boarding houses, gathered in the church by gpeciu I invitation in a “get together” party. The ihvitation was originally issued really to the young women of the neighborhood. They were asked to bring their "beaus” to the church and spend the evening in playing games, impromptu musical entertainments and just such social intercourse as they would enjoy were they at home.

THE EVENING REPUBLICAN’, RENSSELAER, IND.

Appropriate Millinery for Today

HATS for early spring are designed to fit in with any kind of weather. They are often made of fabrics that are worn both summer and winter, like silk. Sometimes a combination of two fabrics, one very summery and the other suggesting winter, makes a pleasing composition in millinery. The furore for jet and maline, which has migrated from Paris to America, makes easy the way for her who must have an early spring (or demi-season) hat. The introduction of black velvet with the jet and 3 maline combination has resulted in beautiful millinery spitable for wear at any season. Two new models, shown in the pictures given Ijere, demonstrate how effective these new ideas are, The hats are in black, but there are numbers of similar hats with flower trimmings. Small flowers in wreaths or boquets, and standing sprays, or “stick-ups,” as they are called, are used on the majority of spring hats and are a welcome touch of lovely color after a winter“givenover"tcFblack velvet millinery. All flower hats and hats of silk, with quill or flower trimmings, are worn earlier in the season than braid or straw hats. The all-flower hat is never entirely out of style and is most useful for the tourist. It is small, for pne thing, and easily carried about, and it is bright and has the charm that belongs to flowers.

GOOD MODEL FOR OPERA COIFFURE AND HEADDRESS

THE attempts to introduce extremely elaborate and intricate styles in hair ornaments did not meet with a great success in this country. American women will not go to great lengths in this direction, as they have demonstrated many times. Just whether any of them will follow the startling fad, which one runs across in Paris, of having the hair to match the costume, remains to be seen. No one with any judg‘

ment would be quite so foolish, it seems. Elaborate enough and very pretty is the headdress shown here, in which a crest of feathers fastened with an ornament is attached to a stiffened band of velvet which fits about the head. ( The feathers in the original model were those of the Paradise bird, but

But the black hat Is also always useful, and at least one black hat should be included in the outfit which one prepares either for summer or winter. The demi-season hat is prepared for both, and is the hat of today. One of the models shown is developed with the new high crown. The real crown of the hat is a soft puff of maline with a high trimming about it, also made of maline, which adds to the effect of height. The rolling brim is partly covered with velvet and finished with a wide border of jet. This jet is not of the old-fashioned heavy kind, but is a composition which is very light, adding almost nothing to the weight of the hat. There is an odd ornament at the front —twojeaves of silk fibre, with ribs of jet beads mounted on long stems. They stand up squarely in front. Made of the same materials, but in an entirely different shape, the “high-side” hat also embodies a new idea in styles for spring. This is an attractive ' and becoming model with soft crown of maline and brim of maline and velvet. The emplacement of jet appears only on the left half of the brim. At the highest point at the. left a fancy ornament of hackle feathers is mounted, the stem concealed under a small jet bow.

JULIA BOTTOMLEY.

these feathers are going out of use on account of the new law against their importation. There are plenty of beautiful domestic feathers, and plenty of ostrich plumage which may be substituted for the Paradise. A jeweled ornament fastens the feather crest to the band. The hair is combed down about the face and neck, and left plain on the crown. Short, loose puffs or coils, or curls, pinned into place, give the effect of short hair with curling ends. This would be an excellent style for women who have thick but short hair, and is pretty with a plain band of velvet about the head, for everyday wear.

JULIA BOTTOMLEY.

Blue "Bags for Silver.

I had always used white Canton flan» nel bags to stow away silver, but found on opening the bags that the silver was badly tarnished and very black looking. A jeweler told me that the reason for this is that white Canton flannel is bleached with a mixture containing sulphur, which spots and tarnishes silver very quickly. Silversmiths always use blue Canton flannel bags and cases for their silver, as no sulphur is used in the preparation of blue Canton flannel and so none lingers in its folds after it is made up into bags and cases.—Exchange.

Pretty Bibs.

Short lengths of linen, damask or duck may be transformed into useful and attractive bibs if one has time for a little handwork. Of course, bibs that are double are more practical than those which are made of a single thickness of the material. If they are made double, it is wise to do the handwork before lining them. Simple designs in outline stitch or cross stitch, if done in colors —say the soft blues or blue and yellow —are particularly effective. The child’s name is cross stitch, too, gives a touch of Individuality.

Black Ornaments.

'W Black ornaments are becoming more and more the rage. The fashionable strings of cut jet beads are obtaining a greater vogue with every week that goes by. Black velvet bracelet#, clasped wjth rhinestone monograms, are worn closely about the wrist, covering the wristbone. Huge black oilcloth roses are pinned against afternoon frocks, and the very latest Paris fad is a cabuchon of onyx surrounded by pearls, fastening the airy material of a white tulle bodies at the bust.

GOOD JOKES

Foiled.

She was flitting stealthily through the shrubbery, when a dark figure loomed up before her. With a little gasp of surprise, she drew back as she recognized her father. “You are too late!” he said, chucking. “Th-there is some mistake,” she quivered. “I am not Isolde, your daughter; I am Yvonne, the cook.” “You cannot deceive me, Isolde,” he said. “You were about to elope with Henri, the chauffeur. Is it not so?” “Yes.” Her tone was defiant. “Then you are too late. I have paid him to elope with Yvonne instead.” —Judge.

An Installment.

It was on a Broadway car. A passenger stopped and picked up a coin from the floor. Three of the other passengers eyed him with envy. He said; “Which of you people dropped a five-dollar gold piece?” «<I did yelled each of the three. “Well," said the finder to the man nearest him, “here's a nickel of it.”

Too Good to Be True.

Wise —John, I must have a new hat, and gown. Husband—That’s good! Wife—And gloves, shoes, silk stockings, opera cloak! Husband—That’s good! Wife—Wake up, you wretch! You’re dreaming you’re in a poker game!— Puck.

Hungry for Knowledge.

“Isn’t it awful,” said Mrs. Hemmandhaw, “some cannibals in German New Guinea ate up two famous scientists. Why do you suppose they did that?” “I don't know,” replied Mr. Hemmandhaw, “unless they were anxious to get a little Inside information.”

SHE WAS WISE.

Mrs. Growler—lt takes a lot of patience to get through this world. Mr. Growler—How do you know — you don’t have to work? Mrs. Growler —True, but I have to listen to grumble about the way you have to work.

If He Falls, It’s Enough.

"Survival of the fittest”— Now, that’s an old, old law. To prove it true thou hittest Thy neighbor on the "Jaw.

Not So Quick.

Miss Gladys—You appeared very abruptly with your errand. You must not come so suddenly into the room when Mrj Smithers is spending the evening with me. Bridget—Suddent! Suddent, ye call it and me at the kayhole three-quar-ters of ah hour!’’—Harper’s Bazadr.

Stung!

Mrs. Stylus—The doctor said that 1 must take plenty of exercise. He advised me to do a lot of walking. Mr. Stylus—Sensible advice! I hope you will follow it. Mrs. Stylus—Yes. But I need a new walking dress.—Judge.

Economy.

Cook —Oh, my lady is economical! before yesterday she saw me making Hamburger steak and immediately gave up the masseuse. Now I must give her massage!—Meggendorfer Bl setter (Munich).

See Pictures of Anarchists.

“A great many unkind remarks are made about bald-headed men.” ‘"That’s so, but 1 dare say you never heard of a bald-headed man throwing a bomb.”

That Didn’t Count.

Bingo—l think I will take a trip to Niagara next week. Every American ought to see it. Wttherby—Haven’t you been there? Ringo—Yes, on my honeymoon.— Puck.

Its Kind.

“This garden is what I call a marathon kind." “What kind is that?” “The only vines allowed in it are runners.”

Heard in franklin Park.

“I never like a peacock.” "It’s a handsome bird. What have you against it?” “Well, it’s an egotist, for one thing, it* tail is full of Pa; and then, again, ft’s amean 'gossip, for itsa tala spreader.”

THE PRUNE CLUB.

“Why is Sweden like heaven?* asked the thin boarder coming to the breakfast table. “I know,” came from the little blonde typewriter. “Well, if you know, push it along, Sweetmeats," said the thin boarder. “Because—” “The same old answer.” “No, it’s not. I was going to say because it is a foreign country,” essayed the little blonde. “Wrong,” came from the thin man. “Listen: Because nearly all the matches are made there.”

He—Couldn’t you look upon me aa more than a brother? . t She —Well, if you ever marry and have a son, I might become your daughter-in-law.

His wife he kisses thriee a day— Oh, .-yes, he’s very good to her. That's work, but What he_ counts as play Is kissing his stenographer.

The Visitor—They tell me your grandfather is a famous horse trader? The Native —Yep, gran’dad knows hosses sure enough. He’s been swappin’ ’em for fifty years. There ain’t no trick in th’ business that he ain’t up to. The Visitor—l suppose it is a pretty tricky business. He has to be careful, no doubt. The Native—-He’s careful, all right. He never trades with ministers. The Visitor—Doesn’t, eh? The Native—Nope. Couple o’ 'em stung him once.

A Condensed Novel.

Mr. Winn—Well, Callis, how’s papa this morning? Callis (a five-year-old)—Nicely, I thank you. Mr. Winn—What a polite little fellow you are. Here’s a nickel for you. Callis Pardon me; but lam not allowed to take it. - Mr. Winn (to himself) —What per feet discipline!Callis —However, nothing was said which will prevent you from buying eome of these cocoanut taffies from the man on the corner!—Puck.

“Where are you going?” “To the department of agriculture,” replied the city man who had bought a farm. “I want them to settle a dispute between my wife and me about the best way to milk a cow. I think it would be sufficient to tie pillows around the cow’s feet, but my wife insists that the only practical way is to give the cow chloroform.” ’ >

IN THESE DAYS.

Sister—l want you to meet Mr Smith at the door this evening and say I’m not at home. Kid Brother —But, sis, dat's perjury.

An Unfailing Theme.

“Dobbs never talks politics and never talks baseball.” “What does he do for a topic of conversation ?’’ "Ob, he still has himself.”

A Notable Affair.

"Wife, how would you like to officiate at a great event?” “What do you mean?” “I have arranged to let you touch a button tomorrow morning at 10:30, whereupon a ton of coal will slide- Into our cellar.”

OF COURSE.

Work and Play.

In the Village.

Serious Question.