Evening Republican, Volume 17, Number 259, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 30 October 1913 — HAPPENINGS IN THE CITIES [ARTICLE+ILLUSTRATION]

HAPPENINGS IN THE CITIES

Steamer’s Line. Lets Go, and Now Mike “Gums It”

ft LEVELAND, O.—" Big Mike,” one V of the bright lights among the galaxy of wallopers who hustle for a living on the ore docks on whisky island, is normally not devoid of loquacity. It is even said of him that one time, when a bucketful of iron ore was accidentally dumped on top of his head he voiced his objections so ably that it was afterward necessary to scrape off what paint his conversation had left on the side of the nearest boat and give it a' new coat. But Mike wasn’t saying anything the other day except when he had to. Then the sounds he emitted were like those produced by a mortar mixed with his hoe just after he had poured in the water. The newspaper man who had gone down there to find out whether, as had been reported, it was possible to walk across the old river bed on its odor, without the necessity of using, the ferry, asked him what was the matter. Mike adjusted one hand beside his

mouth as a wind shield and explained: "Schlochte schooch hmuch shlosh shleeth.” Before the journalist—he had just been imported from Berlin Heights—could carry put his suddenly acquired desire to get away from there as soon as possible, Mike’s side partner, “Chase-the-Duck" Bill, intervened. “You must ’scuse Mike if you can’t tell what he’s sayin’,” 'he Intervened. “He haln’t got any more teeth than a frog. This yere’s the way of it. Mike an’ me was handling the lines on the dock for the Heffelflnger when she came in here yesterday. One of ’em lets go and an end comes back and hits Mike in th* mouth. It got all his teeth. Swallowed some and the rest he sprinkled out like he was trying to gravel the dock.” “Sleesh ’ shosh shleshensheen shollarsh,” gravely interpolated Mike. “Mike says the teeth cost him |h.7; they ‘was false ones, made o* real bone,” Interpreted Bill. Slash smush schlossher shlay shleesh—ohell!” added Mike, and he .continued his observations with an abandon and earnestness and a strong suggestion of burning sulphur that left no doubt as to the line of comment he was trying to get out of his works. ■The saddest part of it was that Mike had just invested In a big chunk of navy plug when the broken line hit him.