Evening Republican, Volume 17, Number 259, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 30 October 1913 — Page 3

HAPPENINGS IN THE CITIES

Steamer’s Line. Lets Go, and Now Mike “Gums It”

ft LEVELAND, O.—" Big Mike,” one V of the bright lights among the galaxy of wallopers who hustle for a living on the ore docks on whisky island, is normally not devoid of loquacity. It is even said of him that one time, when a bucketful of iron ore was accidentally dumped on top of his head he voiced his objections so ably that it was afterward necessary to scrape off what paint his conversation had left on the side of the nearest boat and give it a' new coat. But Mike wasn’t saying anything the other day except when he had to. Then the sounds he emitted were like those produced by a mortar mixed with his hoe just after he had poured in the water. The newspaper man who had gone down there to find out whether, as had been reported, it was possible to walk across the old river bed on its odor, without the necessity of using, the ferry, asked him what was the matter. Mike adjusted one hand beside his

Name Scribbled on Box Car Was Cupid’s Job

Minneapolis, minn.— That Cupid doesn’t always shoot Just in a straight line, however potently, and that some of his darts can wander from coast to coast, over bridges, through tunnels, over prairies and under mountains and then suddenly strike, was proved when Miss Margaret M. Barker of Pittsburgh, Pa., was granted a marriage license here to become the bride of Ernest Noon, a Minneapolis switchman, living with his mother at No. 2325 Fourth street North. The romance of “The Box Car Bride,’’ as the couple’s friends call her, is one that will gladden the hearts of countless young girls and pales into Insignificance Laura Jean’s best. Something more than a year ago, it seems, Miss Barker’s young brother scribbled her name and address upon car No. 26543 of the Erie railway. For 12 months or more it journeyed, making, so the records show, something more than 23,750 miles. Then it came to Minneapolis and Switchman Noon noticed the name and address. Of course it was ordained that he

Tricks by Men in Tests for Fire Department

CHICAGO.— If you lack a fraction of an inch of the height necessary for the attainment of some cherished ambition you may gain it by one or more of three methods. \ First —Raise the scalp the necessary distance by an injection of water beneath the skin. Second —Bastinado the soles of the feet with a flat club until they swell the required amount. Third —Have a sincere friend "bump”, your head forcibly with a shoe brush. These scientific disclosures were made In the offices of the city civil service commission the other day. Dr. E. T. Olson, physical examiner, and Secretary R. A. Wlddowson are responsible for giving them to the world.

Little Georgie, “The Boy With a Mirror Brain”

Detroit, mich.— "The boy with the mirror brain” Is what they call four-year-old George Herbert Van Vleet. His exceptional mental activity dates back to early babyhood. At an age when the average youngster’s vocabulary consists of a series of sounds that no one but a doting parent could by any stretch of the Imagination construe as representing even “googoo,” George was talking distinctly, repeating words that would stump many a grownup. By the time he was sixteen months old he astonished physicians who had been attracted by stories of his'ability when such simple words as spondylootherapy, polycotyledon, metapterygold, limnanthaceae rolled off his tongue as easily as though they contained but one syllable. Today, just turned four, there Is not a word in the English language that, having heard once, he will not repeat, with astonishing clearness of enunciation. He has never been taught to read. All letters look alike to him when they are coupled together, yet here la

mouth as a wind shield and explained: "Schlochte schooch hmuch shlosh shleeth.” Before the journalist—he had just been imported from Berlin Heights—could carry put his suddenly acquired desire to get away from there as soon as possible, Mike’s side partner, “Chase-the-Duck" Bill, intervened. “You must ’scuse Mike if you can’t tell what he’s sayin’,” 'he Intervened. “He haln’t got any more teeth than a frog. This yere’s the way of it. Mike an’ me was handling the lines on the dock for the Heffelflnger when she came in here yesterday. One of ’em lets go and an end comes back and hits Mike in th* mouth. It got all his teeth. Swallowed some and the rest he sprinkled out like he was trying to gravel the dock.” “Sleesh ’ shosh shleshensheen shollarsh,” gravely interpolated Mike. “Mike says the teeth cost him |h.7; they ‘was false ones, made o* real bone,” Interpreted Bill. Slash smush schlossher shlay shleesh—ohell!” added Mike, and he .continued his observations with an abandon and earnestness and a strong suggestion of burning sulphur that left no doubt as to the line of comment he was trying to get out of his works. ■The saddest part of it was that Mike had just invested In a big chunk of navy plug when the broken line hit him.

should, and the ferine fate ordered him that same evening to send the young woihan the prettiest postcard he could find. And he did, and she sent one in reply, More cards were sent, photographs exchanged and the other day Miss Barker herself was an earnestly invited guest to the home of Mr. Noon’s mother. A marriage ceremony followed. “Why,” said she, “we just couldn’t help being happy; how could, we?” The box car bride Is twenty, quite good looking, and is a graduate of a Pittsburgh high school. Her mother, she explained, approved of her coming, as the expectant bridegroom could not get away to go east.

Dr. Olson measured an applicant for the fire department. His height was 5 feet 7% inches. The rules require that firemen must be 5 feet 8 inches tall. The aspirant went away sorrowfully, but returned the next day wearing a confident smile, Dr. Olson too}* his height. ' It was 5 feet 7% Inches. He stood back and looked his man over. Then he placed a hand on the candidate’s scalp.' It felt “pulpy.” “Why, I was born that way,” insisted the man under examination. “G’wan,” protested Olson. “That is water Injected under the scalp and you still lack a quarter of an inch. You can’t get enough water in it to make it, either. You’re out. "It’s the first case of water%n the brain,” said Wlddowson, “but we have encountered two other stunts of the same kind. The first was a trick of doing on the soles of the feet. That may have worked a few times before we caught It. Then a new one bobbed up in the last police examination. “One fellow in the dressing room got another to hit him on the head with a shoe brush.”

a feat sufficient to confound those who would attribute his powers to any training he may have received: Take a map of the world, spread It out in front of him, arm him with a toothpick—all geniuses have their little eccentricities, and his consists of a partiality for a topthplck to be used as a pointer—and he will indicate every country on the map and name it without a second’s hesitation. He knows the capitals of many of these and the chief cities as well. One of his pastimes is sitting down with a geography and hl*- toothpick and locating out-of-the-way lands that •ha»f at some time or other been pointed out to him. »

THE EVENING REPUBLICAN, RENSSELAER, IND.

For a Shopping Tour and a Promenade

TWO hats, each in the moderate size which this season demands of stylish millinery, are contrasted here. One of them belongs to the class known as “tailored’* millinery, while the other belongs to a class designated as “trimmed hats.” This distinction means that one of them ip meant for the street and utility wear, while the other may be worn on the street, but answers the purpose of a dress hat as well. The hat of white velour faced and bound with black velvet could hardly be more simple than it is. The narrowest of velvet bands encircles the crown, finished 'with a little flat bow in front, two broad, short wings, soft and easily adjusted, are placed at the back, and form the sole trimming. The shape is plain, but not at all stiff. The crown is rather soft. The brim droops a little at each side, and; lifts at the front, reminding one of a poke shape. It Is the flexibility of the brim and the suggestion of softness in the crown which makes this shape so elegant. A hat of velvet with the brim narrow at the front and widening toward the back until It become a wide brim, is among the largest and most becoming of hats for youthful faces. The shape has a moderately large crown.

SILK DRESS FOR TEN DOLLARS IS EASILY POSSIBLE

TO make a dress as good looking as that pictured In the illustration is an achievement to be proud of. It could not be accomplished except that so little silk is required for the present fashions in skirts. It cannot be done if dne must pay for the sewing. But things were never easier for the home dressmaker than at present. If she can sew well and has good ideas of correct and graceful lines, she can buy a pattern and undertake her own dressmaking with every assurance of success. This does not- apply to tailored gowns, requiring expert and what may be called professional sewing. But for gowns to be worn at home and for fancy, visiting and party gowns, there is no good reason why the home dressmaker should not be able to copy a good model in gowns of this character. Clothes do not fit the figure in the present modes. They are draped upon it. These free, graceful lines, more than anything else, must be depended upon, with proper use of fabrics and color, to make the remarkably beautiful costumes which have been designed for the coming season. In fabrics a yard wide, twice the length of the figure will make the dress pictured here. In narrower goods one must allow from three to five times the length of, the figure. Thin and supple fabrics must be chosen, andxfne may find satin, messaline, poplins, and other weaves selling at a dollar or a dollar and a quarter the yard. - The width of the skirt in the model shown is less than two yards, therefore, twice the length of the skirt, with an allowance for the hem, and draping at the knee, is the requirement of this skirt. As the skirt is narrow, it is split at the left side. A plaiting of silk, in a contrasting color, is let in st the split, and requires a half yard of soft satin. This plaiting is to be oir itted if the dress is worn over a Ailk petticoat. The skirt is plain and smooth fitting. except fox three plaits laid In the front breadth at the left side seam. It is sewed to a low-necked muslin waist. A plain, thin, corset cover will make a suitable waist to which to attach it. The waist is made separately, and put ou with an attached sash of the silk, which is wrapped about the body and brought up to the left side of the bust He?e it is- fastened in a knot, with a hanging end finished with a little silk pendant Tie waist consists of a plain net or >ace blouse. Across the front of thie a half yard of satin ribbon six Incles wide is sewed under the bust. This ribbon is coveted with a galloon of lace extending around the figure just oyer the bust. Finally a lace veil is divided in half

with round top. The upper and under brim and th* top crown are covered with velvet put' on plain. A puff of velvet shirred on a fine wire covers the side crown. The brim is edged with a puff of velvet, also, which forms a double ruffle and makes a soft frame for the face. At the back two ostrich plumes in the natural colors .are mounted back to back. They are (shaded from white, with brown markings to brown, with a little admixture of white at the tips. A sash of wide moire ribbon in black is laid about the crown and tied in a bow at the front These two hats are among those which may be attempted at home with fair chances of success. There are somethings which the home mil- > liner may do; and others that she is more than likely to fail in If she undertakes them. Nearly' all hats this season require the knowledge and facility of the professional milliner to make them successfully. But shapes ready to trim, and bought with a facing provided, or buckram shapes that may be easily covered, like that on which this velvet hat is made, are not too difficult for the good needle woman who is ambitious enough to attempt them. Her milliner, too, will advise her.

JULIA BOTTOMLEY.

and the’two lengths draped over the blouse, fastened in at the front and with the corners hanging loose at the back. These corners are finished with small pendants like that on the end of the sash at the front. The sash is made from silk, which is left when the skirt is cut. In shaping it to fit the hips, sufficient silk is cut away from the width of the goods to make it. Black silk, made up with emerald green, or cerise or coral or white or In combination with some of the odd new Metallic colors, makes the most satisfactory development of el. After the blouse has been draped, the sash is attached to it. Allowing five dollars to cover the cost of the silk, which does not need to be of a heavy quality, add two dollars for the net or lace for the blouse.

with one dollar for the lace veil used in draping, there remain two dollars to cover the cost of a hAlf yard of ribbon, three small pendants and a half yard of silk for the plaiting. The yard of lace placed over th? ribbon in the blouse may be of cheap lace, since it is covered by the veil. Altogether an allowance of ten dollars will purchase the material, of which this really handsome afternoon or visiting gown is made. The skirt, when made in black, will serve to wear with several waists. A quite plain one in black will give ths gown an entirely different character.

JULIA BOTTOMLEY.

Gathered Smiles

CIRCUMSTANCES. v ’• She was only a small girl, but even little people can be naughty sometimes, and this was one of the occasions when Mabel had kicked over the traces. Naturally, mamma was terribly angry, and Mabel was dispatched to the regions aloft where, in het 1 mother’s bedroom, she was bidden to sit upon a certain chair, pending tions from headquarters. - The particular instructions were long delayed, from Mabel’s point of view, and after half an hour she ventured to query in childish treble: “Mamma, may I come down now? I promise I’ll be good.” Headquarters was still huffy and wafted up the stairs the reply: “No, you sit just where you are till I call you.” "All right,” came in sing-song tone the bedroom, “all right, mamma, only I’m sitting on your best hat!”—■ Gulf States Presbyterian.

Courted Stranger.

“Although I was traveling incognito,’’ mused Plodding Pete, "I was received with marks of distinction too numerous to mention. People of wealth and position vied for my attention.” “What are you doin’?” asked Meandering Mike. “Dreamin’ out loud?” "No. I’m talkin’ about when I was In Kansas pretendin’ ! was a farm hand lookin’ fur work.”

SURE.

The Boarder —You advertised this place as being a summer resort. Why, the thermometer hasn’t been any lower than 90 degrees ever since I’ve been here. Mrs. De Wiser —Well, ain’t 90 degrees summer?

Sure.

What's better than A holiday For the working man? A raise in pay.

Getting Instructions.

“My wife is learning to cook by correspondence course. She writes and asks how to mix biscuits, and they reply by jeturn mail.” “What if the biscuits are"in danger of burning after she gets them in the oven?” “Then she telegraphs.”

Do You Know This Kind?

“Do you know, I like that girl—what a sweet voice she has when she sings, besides, to me, her talking voice is just as sweet.”' “Well, there’s yet another thrill in store for you, old chap. Walt till you get to knowing her better and she calls you up some time and starts to cooing to you over the telephone."— Bt. Louis Republic.

Different Directions.

First Customer —I wish to select a vase. Floorwalker—Yes, madam. James, show the lady to the crockery department. Second Customer —I wish to select a vawz. Floorwalker—Yes, madam. George, show the lady to the bric-a-brac department.

The New M. D.

Miss Gossip—What’s this I hear about the doctor’s being no gentleman? Miss Matter-of-Fact—Yes, that's true. Miss G.—“ Tell me about it What did he— Miss M.-0.-F. —It’s a lady doctor.— Pennsylvania Punch Bowl.

Home of Literature.

“I thought Boston was such a literary town." “Have trouble while you werq there?” • "Had hard work finding a book store, and when I found one they did not have a bartender’s guide."

Box Office Art.

Jones —Well, Smithy, how did you like the show last night? Smith —Oh, fair. Jdnes —What was the plot? Smith —Don’t know. Think it was between the author and the manager to get $2 out of the audience.—Life.

Rich In That.

“And what,” he angrily demanded, “am I to have tn return for all the money *1 have spent on you?" "Well, you’ve got the experience,” she ciMmiy replied.

FORK OVER.

Mr. Holdtite--I wonder where the money’s coming from for that new hat of yours? Mrs. Holdtite—From the mint, I suppose. I’d hate to think you were a counterfeiter.

No, Never.

The mermaid ia a favored soul. She's clever and she's sweet; But If she Cannot have her way She never stamps her feet.

Father's Consent.

"Sir," began the young man nervously, “I wish to ask your consent for my marriage with your daughter.” "Eh?” quickly rejoined the parent. "What of your Income? Is it sufficient to support a wife?” "It is,” boldly returned the slightly nettled aspirant, "and, what is more, it’s sufficient to stand an occasional touch from my wife’s father!”/ “Then she’s yours, my son!” —London Answers.

Keeping Up With Providence.

In Americus, Ga., there is an old, man who has quite a record for marrying. Four wives have died on Win and he has married the fifth. After the fifth wedding a neighbor met the old man’s son and said: ' V", “Well, John, I hear your father has married again.” “Yes, sir," said the boy. "Every time the Lord takes one the old man takes another!”—Saturday Evening Post

Wily Old Sea Serpent.

First Sea Serpent—What’s the useof fooling around away out here? Why, we’re at least five miles from shore. Let’s swim in, scare the bunch and get our names in the papers. Second Sea Serpent—Aw, what's the use? You know yourself last year we weren’t within 2,000 miles of tWs coast, and yet all up and down it they ran our pictures and gave us the best writeups we’ve had since we’ve been in this business.

Not for Ornament.

“It is a mark of distinction for • Chinaman to wear a yellow jacket,” said the summer boarder who tries to entertain with bits of information. "Yes," replied Si Slmllng; “I’ve heard tell about the smart things the Chinese do. But there’s nobody kin make me believe that a Chinaman nor anybody else kin tame a yaller jacket so’s to make it do fur an ornament”

Thrifty Lover.

“I see where a young man wants a girl who jilted him to reimburse him for the note paper he used In writing to her.” “Well, why doesn’t he add additional charges for pen and ink?” “He confesses that he always borrowed a fountain pen.”

POOR MAN.

Henderson—Wouldn’t you like to be rich enough to do what you pleased? Henpeck—No. I’d rather be rich enough to do what my wife pleased.

Various Plans.

Ma will Bumrner In the hills; Sis abroad will roam. Pa, who has to foot the bills, Summers here at home.

A Wise Parson.

Mrs. Wesley Crosscut —You're surely not going to be away Wednesday night! Don’t you remember that la the date Deacon Bunce has set for our pound party? * Rev. Wesley Crosscut' (firmly)—l do my dear; but I prefer the ounce of preventions—Puck.

Very Much So.

“Did you -ever come In touch with society circles?” "Oh, yes; I’ve been knocked down once or twice by their atjtos.” i