Evening Republican, Volume 17, Number 142, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 14 June 1913 — ELECTIVE AFFINITIES. [ARTICLE]

ELECTIVE AFFINITIES.

An Excerpt from Artemus Ward ol Contemporaneous Apposltness. The exsentrlc female clutched me frantically by the arm and holloerd: “You air mine, O you air mine!" “Scarcely,” I sed, endeverin to gft loose from her. But she clung to me and sed: “You air my Alfinerty!” “What upon arth is that?" I about ed. "Dost thou not know?" - “No, I does tent!" “Listen, man, & HI tell ye!” sed the strange female; "for years I hav yearned sos thee. I knowed tnou wast in the world, sumwhares, tho I didn’t know whare. My hart sed he would cum and I took courage. He has cum —he’s here —you air him — you air my Alfinerty. O, ’tie too mutch!” and she sobbed agin. “Yds,” I ansered, “I think it is a dam site too mutch!” v “Hast thou not yearned for me?” she yelled, ringin’ her hands like a female play-actor. “Not a yearn!” I bellered at the.top of my voice, throwin’ her away from me. —Artemus Ward, His Book: Among the Free-Lovers.