Evening Republican, Volume 17, Number 92, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 17 April 1913 — Page 3

STORIDS from the BIG CITIES

Violet Massage, New and Luxurious Barber Treat

ST. LOUIS, MO.—ls you should wander into your barber shop and spy jour favorite tonsorialist shoving 'large electric sparks about another customer’s hair, using only his fingers to accomplish this result, don’t turn and run. And don’t try to guess bow ho does It, for you would ruffle your brain and give up, believing that the man who had shaved your face for the last three or four years has been studying magic and neglected to let you in on his secret. Just pretend you know all about it. Stroll leisurely to a chair and stay , there until the familiar call of “next” Is yours. In the meanwhile watch closely -and you will see your predecessor re■ceive the latest electrode treatment. Yep, that’s it —electrode. Should the customer call for the •entire list, here are a few of the things the barber will do for him: Darken his gray hairs, produce a

He is Four and She Three, So the Wedding Fails

CHICAGO. —He was a Utile b6y four years old and she was only three, and so— ■■■ .—^7tvSergeant Volt slowly unllmbered himself from his stool and craned his body halfway over the desk of the Oak Park police station. Thus ensconced he was able to look down the other afternoon upon the upturned faces jrf the station’s two visitors. "I wanta be married,” Dgvis Enderson piped upward, “an’ she wansa he married, too.” The tiny would-be bride hung her head in becoming modesty. , “Ugh huh,” she whispered at the floor, "please.” “She’s Mil-dred Guterson,” Davis explained, “an’ if you’ll hurry up .’cause we’ve got ten chil-drens an’—oh, yes, an’ a piece of ginger cake an’ a cup an’ sau-cer.” Awed by such a remarkable preparation for wedded bliss, Sergeant Volt •only could gasp out a single word: •“Why?” “'Cause she ast me to," the wouldhe bridegroom said with candor, and the little girl admitted it unblushingly. “An’ we’ll have a nice house all paln-ted up pret-ty,” the happy brlde-groom-to-be confided, “an’ a baby that

Priest Finds $5,000 in the Church Poor Box

NEW YORK. —The deepest mystery surrounds the gift of five one thousand dollar bills which wore plated recently in the poor box just inside the entrance of the Church of Our lady of Guadaloupe, the neif Spanish Roman Catholic edifice jn West 66th street, near Broadway. The sexton said he thought the donor was an elderly woman who was assisted into the church by a footman. As a result of the incident the church is being watched closely by the police. The Ret. Adrian Buisson, rector <jf the parish, is accustomed to take out donations placed in the poor box every week. The other day he opened

“Laziest Man in Town” Goes Out for 60 Days

MILWAUKEE. Wls.—Described by Theodore Puls as being the laslest ij||jl in Milwaukee, Herman Braasch, a probationer for abandonment, was returned to the municipal court for alleged failure to work. - According to Mr. Puls, the department found a child of the man destitute upon a visit to his home. Because of illness it was necessary to remove Mrs. Braasch to the county hospital and she was not in court "We had to treat him like a special patient” said itr. Puls. "We had to take him by the hand and lead him to work, like taking a child to school. Whenever he had a payday, we had to collect his money and then go to his home the following day and ee-' cort him back to work.” According to Mr. Pnls,\the department became tired at sueh titorship

rosy color to his cheeks that will last, from five to ten hours, cure that terrible headache of the “morning after,” relieve backache, chase away warts, mdles, corns or bunions, and end with the newest massage and shampoo. If you notice the operation, you will see the barber holds a small glass tnbe that shoots violet streams of electricity. These sparks go up the victim’s fingers, up the arm, around the Shoulder, and Jump out of the ends of the hair when the barber disturbs the locks with his fingers. The razor manipulators call the apparatus the barber's X-ray, and say it will perform a hundred feats never heard of. To bringW rosy tinge to the cheeks, the violet stream is directed to the desired spots and the reddish color soon looms up. The stream of sparks is the entire secret, and whatever your ailment is, the barber can effect a cure by turning the violet ray on the location of the- pain. The only dinger that may result Is the setting fire to your hair, but this woh’t happen unlesß your locks have been washed with in alcoholic liquid. Whether an inner conflagration will follow if several alcoholic drinks have been consumed is an experiment the barbers say has not been tried.

goes ’squeak-squeak’ when y’ press ’ls tummy.” Miss Mildred Interrupted with: “An’— an' Jes’ lots of pretty mud pies.” The last bit of the planning was done by the would-be bridegroom. Hs fondly called the sergeant’s attention to the fact that in his household there would be no face washing any more. “Or not b’hin’ th’ ears, anyway," he was declaiming positively, when George Guterson, stem parent of the would-be bride, rushed into the station. And thus the short honeymoon came to its waning. At the gate to her home, 944 North Park avenue. Miss Guterson raised her tiny lips and kissed her almost-husband a fond farewell.

the box and grasped a bill and drew it out The priest thought at first it was a dollar bllL as the collections from the poor box never amount to more than a few dollars. He looked at the currency and saw it had a yellow back. The bill was for SI,OOO. The next time he placed his hand in the box he drew forth four bills. Two of those were yellow backed and were for an amount equal to that of the first. Father Buisson took the roll of currency and the pennies and silver from the box to his house. There he discovered that the greenbacks were for fI.OOO each. Father Buisson told a reporter that the sexton of the church saw an elderly woman dressed in black, drive up to the church in a brougham. She offered a short prayer, walked to the poor box and placed the bills in it It was at first reported that the bills had been donated by Mr. Frederick Cortlandt Penfleld of No. 787 Fifth avenue, an enthusiastic worker in the cause of religion. Mr. Penfleld, however, denied any knowledge of the incident

and the moment it permitted its vigilance to lax, Braasch did not go to work He was arrested for violating his probation. "All he does all day is to sit and think" said Mr. Puls. "He said to me one day, 'You don’t think that 1 do a lot of thinking, do your I told him to wake up.” Braasch was sentenced for six months in the bouse of correction to cultivate the "habit of working.”

Little New in Style of the Coiffures of To-Day

Coiffures are still following the fashions of fifty years ago or of those even further back. They are glossy,' parted, dressed close to the head and are neat looking. The ears are covered in all of them and in almost every one the hair is waved a little or curled about the face. The part is not always at the middle, but in the majority of cases it Is. A little, very short and light fringe across the middle of the forehead is becoming to some faces. There is almost no arrangement so pretty for a low forehead as the middle part and occasionally it is good on a high forehead.

VARIED ORNAMENTS FOR HATS

Woman Who Beeks Something New Has But to Make the Round of the Various Shops. It is. entirely due to the hat ornament that the chapeau can be put in the class of the irresistible. So varied and clever are the little decorations that they demand a special description in this big fashion story. One charming ring, through which loops of moire ribbon are run at the side of a straw turban, is of circles of wooden beads in the Bulgarian colors. " " ~.—•.. On a hat by Jeanne Lanvin a flat rose of two shades of yellow wool is surrounded by a disk of brown and green silk leaves, folded from picot ribbon and tinted witii water-colors. A high semi-circle of pleated velvet ribbon is made of three rows, held at the lower edge by a flat folded bow. This ornament, in turn, holds in place a cluster of soft coq feathers. Peacock feathers form two rows arohnd an Iridescent blue and green jewel. A fan taste of pheasant’s wings is caught down on a brim by a butterfly of silk with jewels and embroidered coinspots. Very simple is a ring of knotted -moire ribbon in two colors, orange and brown, surrounding a yellow rose made of swirled mousseline. Scarabs in turquoise and lava are being used to form centers of feather cabochons. The “flight” of Utile tal]rirWl hnmi Is still seen up the side of high brims. Ribbon pompons are wired and top covered stems. These are made of overlapped loops around each other. Question marks, so prominent in coq and other feather quills, are being duplicated in stiffened grasses and ribbon-covered wires. Picot ribbon, especially in the embroidered Bulgarian styles; . will be used for tailored bands around the crowns. Chintz and cretonne flowers are being cut out and laid in flat borders around Wide brims of garden hats before the covering of yellow chiffon is applied. The butterly of lace, net and beaded gauze has been added to flowertrimmed hats.

Tulle Scarfs.

The wearing of scarfs with deoollette gowns has become so general that it is no wonder the woman who has a desire to be original has found a device that is rather novel to replace it Long or short lengths of tulle knotted at the ends or ornamented with tassels are found to be a satisfactory substitute, for even a thickness or two of tulle supplies a little warmth. These strips of tulle are becoming and a touch of color can be given to a white or black costume by means of them. For Instance, two lengths of tulle tied together may combine turquoise, blue and white or black and green.

Short Wraps.

Short wraps of silken stuff, made ▼ary simply and having deep sling drapery at the back in the effect of a hood, are the fad on the Riviera. A wrap of this sort worn by a French beauty is of cerise lansdowne, and aside from the sling drapery, the lines are very simple, great cord# covered with the cerise material outlining a shoulder yoke and forming a big ornament where the fronts cross and fasten.

The hair is arranged in coils at the back of the head above the nape of the neck. Occasionally one sees soft braids wound about the head. When there is a scant supply of hair the small chignon of puffs takes the place of coils. Not so many bands are worn now except for the evening headdress. Strands of pearls or a narrow band of rhinestones provide the finishing touch for these demure coiffures, The styles were never more fascinating, never displayed the adorably lovely hues of beautiful heads or the luster and color of hair to better advantage. JULIA BOTTOMLEY.

STUNNING SPRING SUIT

Tailor made suit of green and gray checked wool with cutaway jacket and green taffeta cuffs and collar.

New Aprons.

There seems to be a fad for wear* ing aprons. Probably the days when "best" black silk aprons were a part of the- wardrobes of many old ladles and muslin, swiss and lace aprons fare worn by many younger dro men when they sat down to sew or stood up to dust will not return, but aprons are enjoying a popularity they hive not had for a long time. A wonderful gown of lace and mull and marquisette thickly embroidered reflects the fad for aprons. It is made with bodice in peasant fashion and under the girdle is fastened as part of the gown a diminutive embroidered apron with two lace-edged pockets.

Smart Neck Bows.

Smart bows to wear with wash blouses are- made of four short, straight, lined pieces of ribbon, so sharply pointed that when caught by the tight knot at the center, they look like the petals of a chrysanthemum. These bows are of gros-grain ribbon in black or a color. When in color they are slipped through horn rings of the same shade; one ring is placed at each end of the knot, and these rings are caught together in the middle on the under side of the ribbon knot to form a fastening clasp Of buckle.

GOOD JOKES

BLUE BKY PROMOTERS. Blue sky promoters are men so optL mistic where other people’s money la concerned that they will promote not merely barren %old and silver mines, but the blue sky Itself. Postmaster General Hitchcock was talking about a blue sky promoter who had been convicted of fraud. “This man’s mine,” he said, “reminded me in Its scarcity of gold of the railway sandwich. “ ‘There ain’t no. ham in this here sahdwlch,’ a man growled, seated on a high stool before the marble bar of an old-fashioned railway restaurant. “ ‘Oh, you ain’t come to the ham yet,’ the attendant answered easily. "The man ate on a while longer. Then he growled again: ' __ “ ‘There ain’t no ham yet.’ “‘Oh,’ said the attendant, ‘you’ve bit over it now.’ ” —New York Tribune.

Procrastination.

A gentleman who had been in Chicago only three days, but who had been paying attention to a prominent Chicago belle, wanted to propose, but was afraid he would be thought too hasty. He delicately broached the subject as follows: “If I were to speak to you of marriage, after having only made your acquaintance three days ago, what would you say to it?’’ "Well, I should say never put off till tomorrow that which you should have done the day before yesterday.” —Life.

AT THE MASQUERADE BALL.

"You have no idea how perfectly lovely you looked in your disguise!" “Do you think so?” 1 “Yes, indeed! I was surprised when you unmasked!"

Maybe.

The man who minds his own affairs Will never la&t true friends. And maybe 'll climb the golden stairs When his life journey ends.

The Weary World.

“What's the matter with Mixon? He seems so sad." “Family troubles.” “Why, just before he was spliced he told me his wife to be was the whole works.” “Yes, I know, but he’s discovered that it takes a whole lot of winding to keep a woman like that going.”— Woman’s World.

Eternal Hope.

“Yes," said the energetic man, "I want the tariff reformed and reformed quick.” I “What points do you object to in •the tariff?" “I don’t know exactly. But I am sure it could be changed in a number of ways that would help my line of business." .

Hearty Approval.

"So you approve of this votes for women parade!” “I do," replied Mr. Growcher. "It will be the first function my wife has attended in years that did not keep me scared about what her costume was going to cost”

How it Sounded.

Bacon —I understand your wife ,speaks four languages? / Egbert—Yes; and it sounds sometimes as if she was trying to speak them all at once.

Athletic Motive.

“So you are going to be a suffragette ?” “Yes,” replied young Mrs. Torkins. "So that you can vote?” “Not exactly. But, you know, marching in a parade must be splendid exercise.

Good Judgment.

"Why did you make such an ado over loaning Wombat a quarter? A quarter isn’t much to lose." - "I didn’t want to establish a precedent"—Judge.

No, Not That

Patience—Women seem to be doing everything that men do, nowadays. Patrice —Nonsense! You never saw a man powdering his nose fifty times a day, did you?

Close Call.

"I bad rather a close call last evening.” "That so?” "Yes. Called on the Bromleys in their new flat and there were two ether people there."

A BARGAIN.

Cholly—Do you think 1 could win your sister? Johnny—l dunno. Bnt say, son. I’ll t’row me influence your way ter about 25 cents.

Not the Same.

When told he had a level head Jones wasn’t pleased by that; j . Ih fact, the man who said It said Poor Jonesy's head was flat.

Mother Wilts.

It was at the dinner table, and the hostess addressed her husband’s brother: “Do have another piece of pie, William?” "Why, really, I’ve already had two; bnt It’s so good I believe I will hate another." “He, he! Mother’s a winner!" said little Frank, excitedly. “She said she’d bet you’d make a pig of yourself.” —Harper’s Bazar.

Telling a Turkey’s Age.

"Casey,” said Pat, “how do yes tell th’ age of a tu-u-rkey?" “Oi can always tell by the teeth," said Casey. "By the teeth!” exclaimed Pat. "But a tu-u-rkey has no teeth." “No,” admitted Casey, "but 01 have." *

Sure Tip.

Teacher—ls there anything you know of, children, which expands with the cold and contracts with the heat? Class (in unison) —Yes’m. Ice.

Long Hyphen.

Patience —He’s married that rich girl, and they’ve hyphenated their names. Patride—Oh, is that so? I heard hn was going to make a dash for bar.

Big Words.

Bacon—Was his speech original? Egbert—No. "Where do you suppose he got tti from?” “Out of the directory, I guess.”

Easy Way.

“So you got away from the constable when you were speeding. How did you manage it?” “Simply threw dust in his ayes.”

Worse Still.

"My father is so angry at our last escapade, that he’s cut me.” j "My father’s done worse than that;! he’s cut my allowance."

The Exception.

"▲re the men boarders allowed to smoke in that house?” "No; the only one allowed to do that is the chimney.”

POKER THOUGHTS.

"Benton, haven’t you just joined "The Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals T” "Why?” “Well, all last night you were tanking of ‘fattening the kitty/ ”

You Will Observe.

He who tears* In this old life To depend upon himself. Though he meet with troubles rife. Ere he quits acquires the pelf.

Encouraging.

Jack—Once more, Molly, will yog marry me? Molly—For the twelfth time thin hour I tell you i will not. Jack (of the navy)—Well, twelve knots an hour la not bad speed sod a little craft 11kg you.—London Tib* Bits. ‘ ’