Evening Republican, Volume 17, Number 54, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 4 March 1913 — No Place to Fasten 'Em. [ARTICLE]

No Place to Fasten 'Em.

A woman who could not decide what to give her husband for Christmas was bent on making the most of the suggestions she might obtain from the clerk in a local department store. The clerk desired to help her, but their ideas concerning gifts were far from coinciding. “How do you think he would like one of these new art brass cuspidors?” suggested the engaging saleslady. “I’m afraid he wouldn’t have any use for it. He doesn’t chew tobacco,” replied the prospective customer. “We have some very nice* smoking sets," remarked the girl. “Oh, my, John doesn’t smoke," exclaimed the woman. “And here is a lovely decanter, with a beautiful set of wine glasses," the Clerk ventured, desperately but iy“I hardly think that would do,” faltered the good wife. “You see, we never have any wine about the house.” < “Well, I might suggest a card table and some bridge decks.” “Oh, no, my husband never plays cards.” “Then you’d better take the elevator to the third floor, millinery department I think your husband need* a pair of wings.”—lndianapolis News.