Evening Republican, Volume 17, Number 34, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 8 February 1913 — WIT and HUMOR [ARTICLE+ILLUSTRATION]

WIT and HUMOR

QUICK RETURN OF PRODIGAL Father and Brother of Cash Martin Extremely Agitated by Sudden Reappearance of Latter. . - - • r "• Cash Martin was the most brilliant boy in hiß community. Whenever the neighbors got tired of discussing the weather or wondering why the hens had stopped laying, they turned themselves into a prophesying circle for the benefit of Cash. The future of Cash unrolled itself before their admiring gaze in limitless splendor and led to a towering pinnacle of greatness. One day excitement in the village became intense. Cash had decided to leave home and wrest from the cold and cruel world that fame and fortune which must surely be his. One old man opined that Cash would be gone 20 years and return with his pockets bulging with the wealth of J. P. Morgan. Another declared that at the end of 17 years he would come whirling through, his native town on the rear platform of a special car in his campaign for the presidency of the United States. Cash listened to all these predictions with a smiling ease that indicated his belief in everything his admirers said. Then he went away. One week later Cash returned, and. worn out by -excessive walking and terriflc tmderfeedlng, strolled into his home and asked his mother for a piece of bread. Cash’s younger brother went to break the news to Cash’s father, who ran a sawmill. There ensued this dialogue: “Pop. Cash is come back, by George!’’ “Has he, by George.” “Yes, by George!’ “By George!”—Popular Magazine.