Evening Republican, Volume 17, Number 32, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 6 February 1913 — Mere’s a Giggle For You; How to Live to Be 110. [ARTICLE]

Mere’s a Giggle For You; How to Live to Be 110.

The editor of The Lake County Times has evidenty grown weary of politics and of his effort to improve the “region” and diverges greatly in his editorial leader for Wednesday., We publish his diversion just to show the meandqrings of the editorial mind. Here it is: Years ago when Cleopatra was running the “Beauty Hints” column in the Cairo Gazette, someone wrote in and wanted to know how to live to be 110 years old. And Cleo. answered: Drink 100 jars of beer a day and let your wives tickle your feet. At least, that’s the way those ancient Egyptians grew old, according to Prof, Max Muller of the University of Pennsylvania. The Professor declares that papyrus scripts discovered along the Nile prove what he says beyond peradventure of a doubt. Which may be considered pretty good proof. The Egyptian noblemen of that early day was very particular to have his feet tickled before retiring and every one of his many “Ijalves” got a tickle. While of course the exact manner in which the tickling was done is neccessarily problematic—we have no 3-coL half-tone, dug up along the Nile to clear up this point—yet we imagine that the nobleman when he wished to go through the feet tickling ceremony, lined his wives up and after reclining iii such a way as to expose the bottom of his fact allowed each wife to pass by and administer one tickle apiece Of course, they were each provided previously with a feather duster, a rake or a hatchet, it being before the “Equal Suffrage” movement and perfectly safe to entrust a woman with an Implement. We are sorry the pTof. mentioned that about the beef. If it is true that they drank 100 handles of suds a day we’re afraid that their right age was 55 years. They were seeing double.