Evening Republican, Volume 16, Number 304, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 23 December 1912 — Page 3

dunderhead s luck

-After Numerous Mistakes and Accidents He Gets the Girl He Was After. By CLARA INEZ DEACON."’"" Ex-Judge Rosser of Marion was a ■widower and lived on the interest of the money he had been wise enough to lay by in his younger days. Colonel Grafton was the owner of the Grafton Woolen Mills, and making money out of the capital invested. Fate was going to bring these two men together, but she was in no hurry about it. They had lived in the same town for five years and had never met ■either in a business or a social way. They simply knew each other by eight. The judge had a daughter named Bessie. At the time the happenings that follow took place to stir up the •country and almost precipitate another panic Miss Bessie was twenty years old. Her aunt was her chaperon and her father’s housekeeper, and a. large and fresh assortment of young men were seekers after her hand and her father’s Cash. . •

The colonel had a son Burt who ■who was making his way through college. Making his way does not signify that he was sawing wood, hoeing corn or cutting ice to make good lor his board and tuition. It simply means that he was somewhat slow and absent-minded, and did not get a grip on the higher studies as the majority of students did. He was a good boy but a little slow! Young Mr. Grafton had come home ■on his .summer vacation. He was going to learn the office work at the ,Mllls, fish, sail' and take trips here and there in an auto. Miss Bessie Rosser was also home on her vacation. She also had plSns, but every girl is liable to change her plans at a moment’s notice. She did not know of the existence of such a young man as Burt Grafton. On the morning after his arrival borne young Grafton started for the Mills to devote half an hour to learning the business and then go a»flshing. There was one busy street corner In the town and he struck It. He also struck a tall, Blim man with bowed shoulders and a chip conveniently ready to be knocked off. It was Judge Rosser. His walk abroad was always aggressive and his look defiant He had somehow imbibed the idea that he personally owned most of the sidewalks in the busy burg. Of course young Grafton did not know this. He was ÜBed to walking where he pleased at college, even If one of the professors stood in the way, and as a consequence there was a collision between him and the judge, and.the judge arose to shout at him: “What do you mean, you dunderhead, by bulling your way through a crowd like this!”

"I didn’t see you," was the apologetic answer. “Then you’re blind!” “I hope—hope.” “Hope nothing! You shouldered STgainst me and ought to be led around like a dancing bear!" “I apologize, sir.” “But I don’t accept it! You are a dunderhead, sir—a dunderhead! You ought to be obliged to give public notice when you are going to charge through the streets!” The Judge was sized up for what he was—an irascible old man who loved a row —and the younger man passed on with a bow. On the next block he turned into a store to shake hands with a merchant and laughingly said: “Just met a raging lion and had a narrow escape from death.” “What do you mean?” “Happened to bump into an old chap who was on the wrong side of the street and he gave me down the hanks in great shape. Called me a dancing bear and a dunderhead. Thought he was going to haul off and paste me one." “Huh! Wonder who'it could be?” “Some old crank living here in town, I suppose.” A young lady who had been at one of the nearby counters and heard every word arose and left the store, and as she passed the young man she bestowed upon him a look so full of contempt and scorn that he whispered to the merchant. “If I’ve stolen her purse or gobbled up her dog I ask her forgiveness.” “You’ve done worse than that, young man!” was the reply. “How? Which?” ■ “I guess it was her daddy you fell foul of. -Sounds very much like him. That’s Miss Rosser, the belle of the town.” “Just my luck! Well, I hope she forgets my face, for that girl looks good to me. So long.” Having learned all about the woolen mill business during the remainder of the day, young Grafton hied him to a fishing-tackle store next morning to procure an outfit. He had Jointed a rod and was flourishing it about when a man entered the store just in time to have his plug hat knocked off and sent rolling. ~ “So it’B you again!” he shouted as he faced the man who had done the £unsge. “A thousand pardons—let me pickit up,” replied the assaulter, “No, sir—no, sir. I want no such—” And they both stooped for, the hat, and there was a collision that bumped them to the floor. When they regained their feet Mr. Rosser, for of course It was he, held out the 111-used tile and wrath fully exclaimed: “You meant to do it. air—you meant tor

“I beg your pardon.** “You are a bull to a China shop—a China shop air.” “1 plead guilty to carelessnes, hat-—*' "I won’t accept of .an apology! You are a - blunderer ej|d a dunderhead. You are a bear and a beast! You ought to be locked up sir!” “I have said that I was sorry,” am swered young Grafton with dignity. “Get a ■guardian, sir—get a guardian and a rope!” With that the judge jammed the battered tile down on his head and stalked out, and the young man gave up his Idea of purchase and walked after him. Three days later, having nothing else to do, he brought out his auto for a ride, driving it himself. Miss Bessie Rosser had an electric runabout, hut had not yet acquired the confidence to run. it herself. The judge had to act as instructor, and this was one of the mornings he took the daughter and the vehicle out There was only one good road in and out of the town, and he naturally took that So young Mr. Grafton —but he was miles ahead. He had a long spin and ran over a hog or two before turning about to retrace his way. Halfway home he met the judge and .his daughter and recognized them. Perhaps the judge was a bit off that day. Perhaps the daughter reached out to take the steering lever from him. It was something of the sort that brought the two machines together with a crash and dumped their occupants out upon the dusty road. A few bruises and no great damage. Young Grafton was up first, but the hand he extended to the girl was ignored, and the judge had only got the dust out of his mouth when he sat up to sEout: “Same man! Same dunderhead!” “If it was my fault sir—,” began the young man as he lifted his cap to the girl. “It was —It was! You did it on pose! You wanted to kill us!” “Father! Father!” “But he did. He’s the dunderhead. I spoke of." “But I think It was your fault as much as mine, though I am willing to pay all damages. Hope you are not hurt, sir, and that your daughter has escaped with the scare alone.” “I don't care a dum what you hope!” exclaimed the Judge. "You are the biggest dunderhead In seven states, and If I ever get back to town I’ll have you Indicted ‘as a nuisance. Yes, I will’” At the spot where the vehicles had come together the highway narrowed and there were high banks on either'* side. A hundred feet below was a turn in the road and bußhes to hide what might he coming. Of a sudden, cap In hand, young Grafton Sprang ever the vehicles and raced for thfi turn. “Didn’t I say he was a dunderhead!” said the father as he pointed after the flying figure. “Why, Bessie, he’s gone clean crazy!” But the next Instant brought a pair of runaway horses into view. They were running as If mad with fear, dragging the wreck of a carriage behind them. At the turn waited ybung Grafton to spring and seize a flapping rein and to be carried into the roadside ."bushes and flung down and have a leg broken. But he had stopped the runaways and saved the two peev pie up the road from being tramplOT to pulp. They knew it as they walked down to him —as they knelt beside him —as the girl wept and the victim gasped. And the father carefully helped the sufferer to a better position and muttered to himself: “Dam romance! It’s going to take Bessie away from me, but I shan’t get such a dunderhead for a son-in-law after all!” And he won’t. He’s already taken a strong liking to the to-be and as for Miss Bessie, Bhe isn’t a girl to oppose romance. (Copyright, 1912, by the McClure Newspaper Syndicate.)

LATEST THING IN INSURANCE

Famous English institution Will Recompense Tourists Who Are Victims of Bad Weather. * The famous insurance company, Lloyds, has recently established insurance against the effects of bad weather for the benefit of tourists who in spring and summer make excursions in the south and west of England. These policies are called “rain policies” and are divided into four classes —A, B, C and D. Tourists taking policies of the A class Have to pay five dollars weekly during the journey, but in exchange receive forty dollars weekly for each week that has rainfall for more than two days. The “rainy days” are considered by the policies of the A and B class to be those in which the rainfall registers more than five millimeters of rain in twenty-four hours, but the assured does not collect on the A policy even though it may pour for two days in the week, unless the rainfall on a subsequent day registers the above stated amount With the B policy the assured collects even though it rain but one day in the week, but since the probabilities of this are much greater than in the cases covered by the other policies the rates are higher and the amount recovered relatively less. The C and D policies offer diverse combinations under the basis already indicated.— Harper’s Weekly. V

Stew Improved.

Old-fashioned beef stew, with which we are all familiar, and which when made light and filled with vegetables, is really delicious, may be made more so by adding a cap of HUffed olives, a dash of paprika and a teaspoonful of minced parsley Just before serving.

MICHIGAN FOOTBALL PLIERS GIVEN “M’S.”

Seventeen members of the Michigan football squad have been awarded “M’s” by the university athletic committee. All but five of the members are residents of Michigan. The list follows: Captain George C. Thompson, Cadillac, Mich.;* Clement Quinn and O. C. Carpell, Saginaw, Mich.; James R. Craig, R. H. Torbet, George C. Paterson and James W. Raynesford,

ATTELL’S START AS FIGHTER

Began Career aa "Tough Kid” In Btreeta of Ban Francisco—Made $200,000 as Pugilists Abe Attell Is "down and out” In the parlance of the prize ring, according to those experts who witnessed his last two decisive defeats. Judging from his performances in these encounters, he can’t “come back,” in the opinion of those same experts. It is said he is Inclined to feel a little that way himself. But Abe bra philosopher, if nothing else. He reviewed his fourteen years of fighting the other day. Until he was vanquished by Kilbane Abe was featherweight champion of the world. He has fought over 250 times. He has fought more champions than any other man now in the ring, and

Abe Attell.

has defended his title every time a 122-pound man could get the offer of a purse and suggested his complicity. He has fought perhaps 3,000 rounds in all. He does not use tobacco in any form, nor has he ever tipped the goblet He is twenty-eight years old. “It’s been a. pretty good game,” he said, reflectively. “Of course I’m kind of bo re when I think' of all the money I’ve let get away from me. "Four of us began together in San Francisco,” he continued. “There were Jimmy Britt and Eddie Hanlon and Frankie Neil and myself. We were all kids together, fighting preliminaries about the same time. The others are all done for now. Fm the only one that’s left in the ring.” A little later he recollected that his ring career had netted him something more than $200,000. He began as a “tough kid” in the San Francisco streets. He is a bit proud of that early record, too. “So,” said Attell, "by and by a kid would come to my mother’s store —or mebbe he’d meet me in the street and call me a ’Jew,’ or we’d catch him in the alley, and then I’d murder him.” The. process of “murdering" ldds was helpful to his shoulder muscles, but began to disturb the neighbors. "So my mother had me sent away to a reform school," said Abe, “and I stayed there for fifteen months. When I got back I remember all the kids around on the street yelling ’Abie’s home.’ I said Td be good. But one of the kids I used to murder —his name was Wires—had been fighting preliminaries, mid he had won twentynine straight fights. All the kids told me to go in and clean him. Alex. Greggalns used to pay sls for preliminary fights then. “By and by some of the kids wait to Greggains and told him they had a kid who oould lick any of his prelim fighters. One of ’em said he was my manager, and Greggalns made a match right away with Eddie Lenny. “I won that fight without a scratch and I gave the sls to my ma. Every time I won —and I won thirty-four fights straight with a knockout—l gave her my dough.”

Captain George C. Thompson.

Detroit; Miller H. Pontius, Circleville, Ohio; H. H. Huebel and W. H. Collette, Menominee, Mich.; Ernest Almendinger, Ann Arbor, Mich.; Michael Boyle, Duluth, Minn.; Charles Barton, Louisville, Ky.; Thomas Bushnell, Cleveland, Ohio; E. E. Hughitt, Escanaba, Mich.; James C. Musser, Akron, Ohio, and William Cole, Cedar Springs, Mich.

Wolgast rather than saw off a leg, will tackle the welter weights. Joe Wood of the Red Sox Is bugs on aeroplanes and talks of buying one. It was announced some time ago that Chick Evans would retire from golf for business. Rube Marquard’s advertising may boost him in vaudeville, bat not in advanced baseball. It looks as If Oscar Vltt will take care of the third base corner for the Tigers next season. Ralph Works, the further Detroit pitcher, will draw salary from Garry Herrmann next season. Joe Jackson, says a report, is the first holdout, but Felix Choulnard may assert he had a scoop on that Hal Chase, the-great first baseman, may never play baseball again. He has started to play basket ball. Packey McFarland said he might retire, but goes right on training for fear something might torn up. - Jack Powell and Jimmy Stephens of the Browns are going to get the can next spring, according to reports. Spanking may prove effective as a punishment for nonthinking football plays, bat it wouldn’t do In baseball. It has been tried and failed.

FIGHTERS NOW LACK PUNCH

Few of Modern Pugilists Possess Sufficient Force In Their Blows to Produce Knockout. Few fighters of the present day are gifted with the “punch,” say experts of the game. The boxers either spar for time and drag along for draw decisions or the sporting world must be forced to the conclusion that there is a dearth of battlers of old of the type of Nelson in his prime, Fitzsimmons, McGovern and Ketchell. This trio, especially Fitz and Ketchell, had wallops like kicks from a mole. Billy Papke of Kewanee, a contemporary of Ketchell, is still living, to be sure, and only recently defeated Carpenter, champion middleweight of France, but Papke at his best is only a shadow of the husky lad who gave Ketchell the battles of his life. Johnny Kilbane has yet to demonstrate that he possesses the punch, and Wolgast Is dabbling around in limit contests without handling his opponents the K. O. potions. Fighters must have the wallop to mAa the greatest successes and shine as drawing cards like Battling Nelson, Joe Gans, Stanley Ketchell, Fitzsimmons and Jeffries. In the heavyweight division there is not one lighter of class who deserves to eat the crumbs from the table of the old timers so far as real fighting ability is concerned. Old speckled Bob Fitzsimmons might clean out the whole bunch in a single night were he in his prime. There is no pugilist who is to the fight game what Frank Gotch is to wrestling. Had Gotch been a prize fighter, instead of a grappler, he might have remained the champion of the world for many years. He has speed, endurance, weight, strength and a wonderful brain. He would have raised the level of pugilism just as he has elevated wrestling.

Notes of Sportdom

PUNS FOR OLYMPIC GAMES

Congress of International Committee Called for Meeting at Lausanne —Standardize Events. A special congress of the international Olympic committee has been called for the first week of next May and the location announced is Lausanne, Switzerland. The conclave will have for its main object the reconstruction of the present Olympic program and it Is understood that the events selected will become standard for all future games. This congress is being organized by a special committee composed of the leading professional men of Lausanne and the Swiss confederation has signified its intention of giving a helping hand to entertain the visitors. * Not alone will the program of the games be discussed at length, but there will be a number of interesting papers read on the psychology and physiology of the sport in all its aspects. The nations wishing to offer suggestions as to the events will have to do so two months in advance, and these will have to be in the form of a manuscript, which can be in the language of the' country offering the suggestion. Should a man in making the suggestion not wish to use his own language, he will have the'option of using English. No paper must exceed 3,000 words. Arthur I. Ireland of 45 "Avenue D’Ouchy, Lausanne, will have charge of all -'communications and he will furnish information about the congress, the papers to be submitted, and the general routine of business. It is proposed to drop some of the events seen in the games at Stockholm and the general rules of competition are to be overhauled. The Greeks, who expected to hold their games In 1914 at Athens, are out to include putting the stone, unlimited run and follow, and the Greek style of throwing the discus. There is a unanimous feeling that the ambidextrous contests with the javelin, discus and 16-potlnd shot, inaugurated by the Swedes, should be relegated. The English delegates will submit a new code to govern the starting of all races, the vital point being that there will be a penalty for a break. They will request the revivial of the 400-meter hurdle race, and for the hammer to be the old style Inplement —that is, a wooden handle and iron head.

BROCKETT IS A HARD HITTER

Buffalo Twlrier Finished Beason With Batting Average of .317—Played In Seventeen Games. Contrary to the general run of things, Pitcher Brockett of Buffalo is a hard hitter. In the seventeen games he played with Buffalo last season he secured a batting average

Pitcher Brockett.

of .817 in thirty-eight times at hat. Three of his hits were for two bases and one for three. Brockett also did well as a pitcher, getting an average of .500.

Comiskey Cried.

Owner Comiakey, of the White Sox, says the 4 bitterest moment of his life was back in the middle of the 70s, when he was attending school at St Mary's, Kan. - “I picked up the papers and noticed the old Chicago 'White Stockings had been beaten three straight in a series with St Louis,” says Commy. *1 had venerated and loved every man of that team, and I remember I couldn’t sleep night. I actually cried in my bitterness of spirit I’ve had many a hard fight since then, but never have I felt so badly aa when those grand White Stockings lost It was like an Idol being crashed.”

Kraenzlein to Go Abroad.

Alvin Kraenzlein, former coach of the University of Michigan track team, who is one of the greatest all-round athletes ever developed in America* will spend two years abroad. It is possible he may sign to coach some of the European athletes in preparation for the 1916 Olympic games in Berlin.

Walsh’s Big Feat

Ed Walsh, the big reel, who is said to be the greatest twirler of today, pitched 4031-3 tunings this season. He allowed <847 hits, which is less than one per inning.

TO BE SERVED TOGETHER

Dishes That Hf rmonizc and Put Least Possible Strain on the Digestive Organs. r. Roast Beef.—With potatoes prepared In all the different ways, baked) or browned sweet potatoes, asparagus, squash, spinach, Brussels sprouts, string beans, cauliflower, or lima, beans. Filet of Beef. —With potatoes, stuffed tomatoes, or stuffed peppers, asparagus or artichokes. Beefsteak. Lyonnalse potatoes,, baked, French fried potatoes, fried potatoes. fried tomatoes, asparagus, spinach or squash. Beef a la Modern—Potato balls, carrot balls, asparagus or glazed onions. Corned Beef.—Boiled potatoes, cabbage, beets, turnips, carrots, beet or tomato salad. Roast Mutton and Lamb. —Green peas, string beans, cauliflower, spinach, green corn, potatoes, Brussels sprouts, lima beans. Boiled Mutton. —Boiled potatoes, cauliflower, cabbage, white turnips, string beans. Lamb and Mutton Chops.—French fried or baked potatoes, egg plant, green corn, creamed corn, stewed and boiled or fried tomatoes. French peas. Roast Veal. —Mashed potatoes, creamed spinach, cauliflower an gratln, French peas, Brussels sprouts, or asparagus. Veal Cutlets. —Creamed, mashed, baked or plain potatoes, wax beans, asparagus, or spinach. Roast Pork. —Mashed potatoes, mashed turnips, apple sauce, creamed corn or beans, red cabbage. Roast Turkey and Chicken. —Mashed potatoes, creamed onion, creamed corn, mashed turnips, cranberry sauce, Brussels sprouts. Ducks and Geese.—Plain or mashed potatoes, browned sweet potatoes, creamed onions, creamed corn Apple sauce, or baked apples.—Home Progress Magazine.

In the KITCHEN

When making “thickening” for sauces, gravies, etc., use half flour and half cornstarch. When chopping mint for sauce, i! the sugar that Is to sweeten it is added it will be found to chop in half the time. A tablespoonful of washing soda and a cup of vinegar poured down the sink will clean out the most stubborn clogged pipes. It is said that a small piece of sugar, added to the water in wfttth cut flowers are placed, will keep the water fresh and sweet. A cheap and durable toaster for a gas stove is a piece of sheet iron. Over this a flve-cent wire toaster can be used without danger of burning or blackening the bread. A white plume can be cleaned successfully by dipping it In raw, cold starch, slightly blued, then let dry and shake off the powdered starch. If not clean repeat. For removing old paint, make a lye with one can of potash and half a gallon of water, apply with an old paint brush and do not touch with the hands, as it will bum. Wash off and dry well. When nails are knocked into hard wood they often'bend. To prevent this dip each nail in a little sweet 00, or any kind of oil before driving into the wood, and they will not bend.

Plums In Batter.

Make a batter with two beaten eggs, five tablespoonfuls of flour, a little more than one pint of milk, and add a pinch of salt. Remove the stones from one quart of large ripe plums, crack them, put the kernels inside of the plums again, mix the fruit with two heaping tablespoonfuls of moist sugar and stir it lightly into the batter. Turn it into a buttered padding dish and hake in a hot oven till done, about 40 minutes. Sprinkle powdered sugar over the top, and serve hot with one-half cupful of butter, one cup of sugar, and one well beaten egg stirred to a cream and flavored.

Italian Celery Soup.

Melt two rounding tablspoons of blitter in a saucepan; add a small onion sliced and two cups of celery cut fine. Cook together until beginning to t-m yellow, cover with water and cook the celery until soft Press through a sieve and add two cups of cream. Beat the yolks of two eggs with a tablespoonful of milk; add to the soup, carefully keeping it under the boiling point Serve the soup with croutons and grate a little Parmesan cheese over the top the very last thing before serving.

Mock Apple Ple.

Nice when you don’t have any pie filling handy. Two crackers rolled, one cup sugar, Juice of one-half lemon or more if you like, a Uttle saJt|| and nutmeg, about two-thirds cup cold water. Bake between two crusts. ' 1 11

Marshmallow Pudding.

One-half pound marshmallows, cat into quarters. Pour over these a can of shredded pineapple, dust with powdered sugar and let stand. When ready ~ to serve whip one-half pint cream« and cover padding with same.

Grated Apple Pie.

Six large apples grated, (me cap sugar, grated rind one lemon, batter size of walnut yolk two eggs. Use thdjj whites for the frosting on top.