Evening Republican, Volume 16, Number 296, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 12 December 1912 — Page 3

CAP and BELLE

ONE OBJECTION IN RESERVE Husband Was Willing to Concede Everything to Wife’s Wishes l_ With Exception of Baseball. “So you have gives up smoking?” ( “Yes.” “Too costly, or did yop. have reason to believe It was-bad for yoUr nerves?" “No, I quit because my wife ordered me to do so.” “Did you shave off your mustache because your wife ordered you to do so?” “You’ve guessed it the first time.” “I suppose you would part your hair In the middle if your wife told you that was where she wanted it parted.” "Certainly.” “I hear that you have quit sending money to your mother because your Wife objected." “Yes. I tried to do it secretly, but ishe found it out” ‘1 should think you’d spunk up and assert your manhood.” "Just you wait Some day my wife will order me to quit going to ball games, and then she’ll find out where she gets off.”

Gradual Spread of Knowledge.

"Is this the Information editor?" , “Yes.” “Will you please tell me why '•straw’ votes are so called?” "Because straws show which way the wind blows.” “Then I’ve lost a pound of chocolate creams. I had an Idea that It was because they packed them In hales and sold them.”

Comparatively Easy.

"An aviator Is building a machine to fly across the Atlantic." “That has already been done.” “You mean to tell me that men have already flown across the Atlantic?” “No, merely that men have already built machines to do it."

■ Daisy—ls she so economical? Malsie —Well, she’s saving her wedding dress for a possible second marriage.

“Did you see my painting at the exf bibition?” “I did. It was the only picture I examined with care.” > “Splendid! .Why was that?" “Because nobody else was looking at It"

Must Be Black.

"She wants a black dog. I don’t think this dog will be black enough.” "Why must she have such a black dog?” “She’s in mourning for her father-in-law. Didn’t you know?”

She Was Anticipating.

r "When he proposed to her she knocked him down.” "Gracious 1 What did he say to that?" "He yelled: 'Hold on! Hold on! We ain’t married yet!”'

Help Bome.

“After all/* remarked Mr. Growcher, “the trusts are of great benefit to the public.” , - “In what way?” "They give people with family troubles something to talk about”

Style Note.

"Why do your oxen have blinders? There are no autos or railroads around here.” “Yes, I know, but,there are summer boarders!"

in Chicago.

Mrs. Dearborn—Who is the gentleman over in the corner, frowning at you, dear? - j Mrs. Wabash (thrice married)—Oh, that’s next to my . last husband.

VERY.

Baw It

LANDLORD KNEW HER WANTS

Bav#d Lady Tenant Much Trouble by Anticipating Her Little Talk for Needed Repairs. _"I have called to collect the rent" said the landlord. “Yes,” replied the lady of the hqusa, “come in. Now, before I give you the money this month I —•” “Just a minute, madam,” said the landlord. “I can save your time for you. I know the parlor isn’t fit for a pig to live in, the dining room wall paper is a shock to people of refinement the kitchen walls are a disgrace, and the back porch is a menace to life and limb. I’m also aware' that you won’t stay here another month unless the barber shop wall paper in the back bedroom is changed to something in a delicate qink, and I'm next to the fact that you are ashamed to have people look at such gas fixtures as I have provided. This spring I’m going to paint the front and back porches and let it go at that” “Thank you very much,” said the lady meekly. “You have saved me a lot of trouble. That Is all we really expected to have done, but I was afraid that I should have to make the same old bluff to get that much out of you.”

WILLING TO OBLIGE.

Wifey—Joshia, why don’t yew quit Chewin’ terbacker? Hubby—By grass, I will, Susan, es yew Will quit chewin’ th’ rag.

No Wife for Him.

"What do I want with a wife?” snorted Bachelor Bockwedder, on reading an old maid'B 'reasons for not wanting a husband. “I have a game rooster that is vain about -his fine feathers, a goat that chews the rag, an areoplane that gets me up in the air, and an automobile that keeps me all the time broke!"—Judge.

A Year or Two Later.

The Stranger—They tell me the famous baseball player who won the automobile lives In this town. The Native—Yep, tbat’B Hank over there with th’ trunk on his shoulder. He runs th’ hack between th’ hotel an’ th’ deepo. He traded th’ automobile fer it. \

Mean.

"Who’s sick at your house?” she asked. "No one," she replied.' 5 ' "But I saw a swell standing out in front yesterday.” “Yes, we own it. That makes somebody sick at your house now, doesn’t ft?” * •

Unconquerable Distrust.

"Daily exercise will add ten years to your life,” said the solicitous friend. “Humph!” replied the suspicious person; "I suppose you are still working in the interests of the company in which you persuaded me to insure my life.”

Nothing Unusual.

Flimmer —I read In the paper that a Cleveland brakeman has three wives. Flamson —Well, what of it? ' Flimmer—Three wives, man; think of it! " Flamson —But you must remember that coupling is his regular business.

Very Disagreeable.

Summer Belle —There go two of the most disagreeable men I’ve met this season. Friend —Are they? Why? 9 Summer Belle —One of them stares me out of countenance and the other won’t look at me at all* ..

A Thrashing Follows.

"Bilfur Bays he wants his boy to have plenty of red Wood.” "What does he do when his boy’s red blood leads him to smash a window?” " "Oh, in a case like that Bilfur develops a little red blood himself.*

At the Barber's.

"Your hair is rather thin." " “Your nose is mighty red.” “Er—l mean you ought to use something for your hair.” "And you ought to use something tor your breath.” "Er—nice day—er—”

Yea, Indeed.

"It is said that Lord Byron had convulsions when he heard that the first girl he ever loved was married to another man.” “How proud she must have been during the rest of her life.”

The Scared One.

Aunt—Last night before retiring 1 looked under the bed as usual, and really found a man there. Niece—l suppose you screamed for help? . • ; Aunt—No; he did

The CIVIL WAR FIFTY YEARS AGO THIS WEEK

December 2, 18^ Lieutenant Hoffman and three men of the First New Jersey cavalry were surprised on picket duty three miles from Dumfries, Va., and captured. General Averill sent a reconnoissance up the Rappahannock river from Brooks Station, and captured a number of Confederate pickets. Two companies of the Eight Pennsylvania cavalry were cut off from the main body of the command by a large force of Confederates and barely escaped capture, by precipitate flight, A portion of the Red river expedition under General Banks sailed from New York. Reverdy Johnson of Maryland, In a letter to the National Intelligencer, endeavored to refute the charge made by a New Orleans journal reflecting on his conduct as. commissioner of the United States in that city. Maj.-Gen. Halleck made a report of the operations of the United States armies since his appointment as com-mander-in-chief, In July. Col. J. M. Glover, commanding at Rolla, Mo., learning that a large force of Confederate Irregulars was In camp in the Ozarks at the headwaters of the Current river, set out after them with a sufficient force, but found only one small detachment, which he drove off. His column marched 200 miles in seven days, returning on this date. A successful reconnoissance was made frpm Bolivar Heights, Va., to Charlestown, Berrysville, etc., by a Union force under General Geary. December 3, 1862. '. - Maj.\A. P. Henry, with a party of National troops belonging to the Ninetyfirst Indiana and the Fifteenth Kentucky cavalry, entered and took possession of Princeton, Ky., at eight o'clock in the morning, capturing a number of partisan fighters and other persons Inimical to the government of the United States. * The schooners Emma Tuttle, Brilliant, and J. P. Boker were captured while attempting to run the blockade; the first two at New Inlet, and the third at Deep Inlet, N. C. A series of skirmishes occured near Oxford Miss., between a brigade of Union troops under Major Hatch, and a considerable fdrce of Confederates, resulting In the capture of ninetytwo Confederates.

December 4, 1862. A heavy exchange of fire took place between six Union gunboats in front of Port Royal, on the Rappahannock river, in Virginia, and the Confederate batteries behind the town. The gunboats withdrew at the end of an hour, with no harm donejexceptingg to sorpe houses that were in the line of fire. The North Carolina house of commons unanimously passed a series of resolutions expressing their confidence in the patriotism and uprightness of Jefferson Davis, president of the Confederacy, and approving the policy of the war as set forth by General Vance, and declaring that the “separation was final, and that North Carolina would never consent to a re-union at any time or under any terms." A Confederate force was tumbled out of camp in a skirmish with National troops at Tuscumbia, Ala. Winchester, Va, surrendered again to a reconnoltering force of Union troops under General Geary. The Confederate General Hindman, before making his attack on the National forces in Arkansas, issued an address to .his soldiers,, in which he told them what to do, and what not to do, in battle. 5, 1862. A fight took place near Coffeevllle, Miss., between two thousand Union cavalry, under the command of Colonels Dickey and Lee, and a body of five thousand Confederate infantry, in which the Union force was severely defeated after an hour of fighting, leaving three hundred of iheir number killed, wounded, and missing. The Third lowa and Twenty-ninth Wisconsin regiments arrived at Helena, Ark. . They were attacked while pitching camp by a small force of Confederate cavalry that depended on surprise and confusion for success, but without avail. The larger force of the Nationals decided the day, and the attacking party was driven off, with a considerable loss in killed, wounded, and captured. Gen. Winfield Scott, through the Natloh&l Intelligencer, replied to a letter from James Buchanan, an echo of a dispute between them concerning the early conduct of troops in the war. December 6, 1862. The- Union Gen. A. P. Hovey issued an order to the officers and soldiers of his command thanking them for their cheerfulness* and bravery during the recent expedition into Mississippi. The Confederate schooners Southern Merchant and Naniope, laden with sugar and molasses, were captured in Chicot Pass, on the Mississippi, by the United States gunboat Diana. General Viele, the military governor at Norfolk; Va., issued a proclamation and writ of election tor a member of congress from the Norfolk district Major-General Dix, commanding the I Department of Virginia, issued an adtress from his headquarters at Fbr*

tress Monroe informing the people of neighboring districts that smuggling goods into the Confederate lines was prohibited; that every person detected In the attempt would be put at bard labor in FortNoffolk; mfT the prey erty seized and sold for* the benefit of the poor' and that in order that they might speedily return in form to the Union, $0 election would be held in which they were called upon to Shoose a member of congress. The schooner Medora of Baltimore, Md., laden with borax, medical military uniforms, shoes, blankets, ammunition, 4tc., supposed to be intended for the Confederate armies’, was seized by a party of National troops while lying at anchor under Hackett’s Point, Md. A force of Confederates made an unsuccessful attack on a Union forage train near Lebanon, Tenn., being repulsed by the Ninety-third Ohio, Which was acting as guard. If December 7, 1862. The United States mall Ariel was captured off the eastern coast of Cuba by the Confederate privateer Alabama, but was released after a brief detention on giving a bond of $228,60*1. payable on acknowledgement by the Confederate government. Gen. A. P. Hovey returned to Friar’s on the Mississippi, in the morning. The battie of Prairie Grove, for Fayetteville, was fought between/the National forces under Generals Blunt and Herron and the Confederates an-, der Marmaduke, Hindman, Parsons, and Frost, resulting in a defeat for the southerners with heavy loss. The Confederate cavalry leader Gen. John H. Morgan captured a large force of Union troops under Col. A. B. Moore, of the One Hundred and Fourth Illinois, after a hard fight at Hartsville, Tenn. . * • December 8, 1862. Andrew Johnson, military governor of Tennessee, Issued a proclamation appointing and ordering elections to be held on the twenty-ninth day of December, 1862, to fill the vacancies in the Thirty-seventh congress of the United States. Rumors of an Invasion of New Mexico outlaws from Texas was received at Barcley’s Fort, New Mexico, and preparations were made to receive them. The Iron-clad steamer Shenandoah was launched at Philadelphia, Pa. At. New Orleans, La., General Butler gave notice that all persons arriving in the city would be required to take the oath of allegiance to the United States. (Copyright, 1912, by W. G. Chapman.)

VERY MUCH TO THE GOOD

Diplomatist Quick to Take Advantage of Oversight Committed by His Friend. Dr. Wekerle, Hungarian minister of finance, had a country seat at Pills, near Buda-Pesth, where he was in ithe habit of spending.his Sundays. His only piece of luggage on these aocasions consisted of a small handbag, which never contained anything but the regulation bottle, four handkerchiefs, and a traveling cap. Returning one Monday to the capital, the minister met a friend, a gentleman named Von Fischer, who was carrying a bag exactly the counterpart of his excellency’s valise. Herr von Fischer smiled a thoughtful smile as he noticed the similarity of the bags and whispered to the minister: “My bag is filled with smuggled Turkish tobacco. You will be good enough to shield me against the custom house spies, I hope/’ The minister looked serious. "I will do nothing of the kind,” he said, and when the two gentlemen arrived at the Pesth depot, the minister beckoned to a custom house officer and said: "My friend desires to pay duty on a lot of Turkish tobacco he has in his bag.” “His excellency is joking,” cried the baron, who meanwhile had changed bags with the minister; "see, I have no contraband articles about me,” and he opened the bag in proof of what he said. The minister looked perplexed for a moment, then he resolutely grabbed his friend’s bag and said to the official: "Well, assess for the tobacco, but be quick about it. I have no time to lose.” The official acted on the suggestion, and the minister paid three florins and fifty pfennigs into the treasury of his own department. Then he Jumped into the carriage and drove off, shouting ont his thanks to the baron for his present of 20 pounds of excellent tobacco.

Missed the Piste With Irving.

William Winter’s brief emphatic criticism of a certain actor's interpretation of "Hamlet” is one of the immortals in the line of American dramatic criticisms. Mr. Winter wrote: “Kerosense Scads played ‘Hamlet’ at the Herald Square theater last night He played it for hours.” When Laurence Irving, son of Sir Henry, paid his first visit to America a friend related the anecdote of this famous criticism. Mr. Irving didn’t smile nor did he show any signs of collapse. “Played it tor four hours,” repeated Mr. Irving. “Four hours. That's an extremely long duration as gauged by the present acting editions of the drama. He must have used the text from the original."

Not an Actor.

"Is he much of an actor?" "Not much. They say he’s pretty fair in Shakespeare, but he can’t do a sidewalk patter or clog dance worth aoent" g*

WOMAN'S REALM

NEW EVENING FABRICS FASHION’B LABT WORDS AS TO CLINGING MATERIALS. Apparel Must Be Light, Beaded Nets Being the Heaviest of All Wear That Has the Approval of the Designers. Qualities of rich material; softly draped and wound around the figure, compose the new evening gowns, which are exquisitely lovely—and the despair of the amateur dressmaker. Almost any woman with a knack for sewing could cut and hang one of the Short-waisted Directqire gowns which

Ermine Bcarf and Muff.

have been in vogue during the past two seasons, and it was not a difficult matter to add a soft, dragging little train —round or pointed. But the new costume, combining satin, brocade, fur, metallic net or chiffon, and much lace, is another thing entirely, and skillful hands are required to concoct from all these contrasting stuffsa gown that shall combine exquisite simplicity of line and the perfect grace that hides, yet reveals the figure beneath. Fortunately, the new evening fabrics are exceedingly soft and clinging, and even a gown of velvet brocade

OLD STYLE FAVORED AGAIN

Pine and Combs of Tortoise Bhell Are to Be Used as Heed Ornaments This Beason. Back into the realm of hair ornaments have come the pins and combs of tortoise shell that typified the hairdressing of our grandmothers, and is traceable to the time of the Medlcls. —. If you have some treasured heirlooms that are large, carved or inlaid, bring them ont into the light of modern day and place them in the coils and waves of your ’hair. You then can smile at the world. Fillets of tortoise shell rivki the high combs, and the disks that suggest the Holland headdress, or perhaps the ornaments of the middle age*, have returned. '' The empire comb, with Its spreading lines that resemble the peacock’s lull 1. an important arrival. The hair Is drawn up in a series of curls at the of the neck, the high comb mounting Shove them. Generally the hair is parted in front or at the ride. The band, or fillet, is passed over the brow, the hair waved and Worn in graceful lines low over the temple* and ears. Disks are worn if this style hairdressing is carried out Coils of hair are held in place by ball tortoise-shell pins, and the bars of shell to catch the. stray curls and to support the hair have again come into their own. Since the coiffure of the moment in conservatively simple, there is ample room for adding decoration by way of ornaments, and makers are offering many attractive styles to convince women of the change.

draped over s petticoat of satin, dom not Weigh more than a half dozen pounds, while the lace and satin dancing gowns may be measured in weight by ounces. The beaded nets are the heaviest of all the new evening fabric* and the bead fringes add appreciably to the weight of the chiffon and tace< tnnlc, but there is a wondertuTUlhtness and ethereal charm about most' of the evening costumes of the sea* son. Sometimes lace flounces and draperies are used over colored silk or satin, the favorite shades for these* “show-through" effects being the new yellow and pinkish red tones like saffron, apricot, pale coraL and geranium. All the yellow tones in demand' for evening wear—especially a very brilliant orange-yellow, called "burnt onion.” Blaek Chantilly lace is used: lavishly over white charmeuso and: satin meteor. Usually a red rose or broad bands of black velvet ribbon, imparts the distinctive note to these 1 lace-veiled costumes in black and white. .. Narrow band trimmings of fur are used on chiffons, and even laces and sometimes a band of fur serves as A shoulder strap, Instead of the morw familiar band of rhinestones or pearls. Some frocks that depend for their attractiveness upon simplicity and perfection of line are trimmed solely with a narrow fur edging on the tunic. Sleeves on most of the new evening gowns are so tiny that they are /barely worth the name, though the arm and shoulder are In some cases veiled' with thin net. Swansdown is used oa dancing frocks for debutantes, and when combined with white chiffon, lace, pearls, or tiny silk floral festoons, is exquisitely dainty and girlish. ■

Novelties for the Winter. Various forms of "suitings,” in red materials, are novelties this year for coats and skirts, and they are produced in very exclusive shadings. But, unfortunately, most of the chic materials of this description are, like ratines, so very expensive; they are manufactured with such a soft, velvety finish that the rough effect is entirely subdued. Still, for real hard wear, It Is useless to economise in fabric; besides we ought not to grudge paying for the wonderful new colorings which are Imparted to these wonderful cloths. Mole, brown, red, purple and shot-gray effects, with a preponderatlng presence of mid-Vic-torian magneto tones are all leading colors this season.

Color In Fall Styles.

Harper's Bazar says: "The first problem to be met and settled in selecting new clothes this autumn is the question of color. No gown can be a success If the color scheme Is unbecoming or inappropriate to the age of Its wearer. And although this statement immediately is open to questions of taste and individuality, there are a few rules to be observed without fail.”

Fur Collarettes.

The new fur collarettes, consisting of straight strips of fur, such as ermine, sable, skunk or a squirrel-imi-tating chinchilla, with a stiff bow of black moire ribbon and a plaited tongue of old iace, are excellent compromises between the tulle ruffle or feather boa of warmer days, and the heavy fur stole so full of comfort in the winter.

CREEPING APRON FOR BABY

Baves the Clothes and Does Away With Much Laborious Work In the Laundry. * - Creeping aprons save the baby's clothes. They are made in a straight piece, long enough to enclose the skirt* like a bag, with an elastic at each end to fasten around the waist. Children with a family , history of consumption should sleep in the open air and live in it as much as possible. Their food should contain a larger proportion of fat than is common—cream, butter, milk, fresh eggs, -etc. Families who live ,in large ettlea find it difficult to keep their children contented in their own yard; they seem to want to go into the other boy's or girl’s yard to play. By providing some Interesting occupation ter the child to do in his own home or, yard it will soon become more attrao-' tlve and his desire to find amusement in the, company of other children will grow less and less. fVV,

Accommodation Brooch.

E One of the new bowknot pins, set In a jeweled rim, has a feature -that makes it useful. It is apparently a black moire ribbon framed in small diamonds, but this ribbon, instead of being stationary, may be removed and other colors substituted to match any costume. One pin of this sort is nearly three Inches long, and is wont to catch up laces or drapery on the Corsage jpr as a hair ornament Buckles ter vetch s a l m n ho #Annd 4m IkafgamkA ai via lODB can oc lounu m so the ribbon of. the ma£ ba changed to match differw^gpwmL

MARY DEAN.