Evening Republican, Volume 16, Number 264, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 4 November 1912 — Page 2

The Daily Republican HEALEY A CLARK, Publishers. RHNSSSLAEEL INDIANA.

EXCUSE ME!

Novelized from the Comedy of tboSasM Name ILLUSTRATED From rMW>phi es the Plev as Prodicad By Haary W. SavaSa

By Rupert Hughes

Oonriisbvuu, i ' \ 14 BYNOPSIS. 'Lieut Harry Mallory la ordered to the {Philippines. He and Marjorie Newton decide to elope, but wreck of taxicab presents their seeing minister on the way to jthe train. Transcontinental train Is taking on passengers. Porter has a lively tame with an Englishman and Ira LathBi Yankee business man. The elopers an exciting time getting to the "Little Jimmie” Wellington, bound teno to get a divorce, boards train tudlin condition. Later Mrs. Jimmie its. She Is also bound for Reno with sum object. Likewise Mrs. Sammy Whitcomb. Latter blames Mrs. Jimmie for {her marital troubles. Classmates of Mallory deoorate bridal berth. Rev. and Mrs. start on a vacation. They decide to cut loose and Temple removes evidence •of his calling. Marjorie decides to let {Mallory proceed alone, but train starts while they are lost In farewell. Passenigers Join Mallory's classmates In giving icouple wedding naming. Marjorie is distracted. Ira Lathrop, woman-hating (bachelor, discovers an old sweetheart, [Anne Gattle. a fellow passenger. Mallory vainly hunts for a preacher among the passengers. Mrat Wellington hears ft Jtfle Jimmie's voice. Later she -meets Sfira Whitcomb. Mallory reports to Marjorie his failure to find a preacher. They ■decide to pretend a quarrel and Mallory muds a vacant berth. Mrs. Jimmie discovers Wellington on the train. Mallory •again makes an unsuccessful hunt for a {preacher. Dr. Temple poses as a physician. Mr*. Temple Is Induced by Mrs. Wellington to smoke a cigar. Sight of preacher on a station platform raises •Mallory's hopes, but he takes another train. Missing hand baggage compels the couple to borrow from passengers. CHAPTER XXl—(Continued). ! The first one they labored at, they eould not budge after a biceps-break-ing tug. The second flew up with such •ease that they went over backward. Ashton put his head out and announced that the approaching depot was labelled "Green River." Wellington burbled: "What a beautiful name tor a shtatlon Ashton announced that there was something beautifuller still on the platform—“Oh, a peach!—a nectarine! and she’s getting on this train." Even Doctor Temple declared that she was a dear lltte thing, wasn’t she? Wellington pushed him aside, saying: “Stand back Doc, and let me see; I have a keen sense of beau’ful.’’ “Be careful," cried the doctor, “he’ll fall out of the window." "Not out of that window," Ashton sagely observed, seeing the bulk of Wellington. As the train started oft again, LJttle Jimmie distributed alcoholic smiles to the Green Riverers on the platform and called out: "Good’bye, ever’body. You’re all abslootly—ow— ow!” He clapped his hand to his eye and crawled back into the ear, groaning with pain. “What’s the matter?” said Wedgewood. “Got something in your eye?" “No, you blamed fool. I’m trying to look through my thumb." "Poor fellow!" sympathized Doctor Temple, “it’s a cinder!" "A cinder! It’s at leasht & ton of coal." "I say, old boy, let me have a peek,” said Wedgewood, screwing in his monocle and peering Into the depths of Wellington’s eye. “I can’t see a bally thing." “Of course not, with that blinder on,” growled the miserable J wretch, weeping In spite of himself and rubbing his smarting orb. "Don’t rub that eye,” Ashton counselled, “rub the other eye.” “It’s my eye; I’ll rub it If I want to. Get me a doctor, somebody. I’m dying." “Here’s Doctor Temple,” said Ashton, “right on the Job.” Wellington turned to the old clergyman with pathetic trust, and the deceiver writhed In his disguise. The best he could think of was: "Will somebody lend me a lead pencil?” “What for?” said Wellington, uneasily. “I am going to roll your upper lid op on It,” said the Doctor. “Oh, no, you’re not.” said the patient. “You can roll your own lids!” Then the conductor, still another conductor, wandered on the scene and asked as if It were not a world-impor-tant matter: “What’s the matter—pick up a cinder?” “Yes. Perhaps you can get It out,” the alleged doctor appealed. The conductor nodded: “The best way Is this—take hold of the winkers.” "The what?" mumbled Wellington. “Grab the winkers of your upper eyelid In your right hand —" *Tv« got ’em." "Now grab the winkers of your lower eyelid in your left hand. Now raise the right hand, push the under Ed under the overlld and haul the overiid over the underlld; when you have the overlld well over the ifit 4er —* Wellington waved him away: "Say, what do.you think I’m trying to do? etufi! a mattress? Get out of my way. I want my wife—lead me to my wife.” “An excellent Idea," said Dr. Temple, who bad been praying for a recon-

He guided WeTWngtnw with difficulty to the observation room and. finding Mrs. Wellington at the desk as nsoal, he began: “Oh, Mra. Wellington, may I introduce y«ni to your husband” Mrs. Wellington rose haughtily, caught a sight of her suffering consort and ran to him with a cry of "Jimmie!" "Lucretla!” “What’s happened—are you killed?" “I’m far from well. But don’t worry. My life ■ insurance Is paid up." "Oh, my poor little darling,” Mrs. Jimmie fluttered, “What on earth ails you?’’ Bhe turned to the doctor. "Is he going to die?’’ “I think not," said the doctor. “It's only a bad case of clnder-tn-the-eye-tia.” Thus reassured, Mrs. Wellington went into the patient’s eye with her handkerchief. 'ls that the eye?*’ she asked. “No!” he howled, “the other one.” She went Into that and came out with the cinder. “There! It’s Just a tiny speck." _ Wellington regarded the mote with amazement. “Is that all? It felt as if I had Pike’s Peak In my eye.” Then he waxed tender. “Oh, Lucretla, how can I ever —” But she drew away with a disdainful : “Give me back my hand, please.” "Now, Lucretla," he protested, “don’t you think you’re carrying this pretty far?” - "Only as far as Reno,” she answered grimly, which stung him to retort: “You’d better take the beam out of your own eye, now that you’ve taken the cinder out of mine," but she, noting that they were the center of Interest, observed: “All the passengers are enjoying this, my dear. You’d better go back to the case." Wellington regarded her with a revulsion to wrath. He thundered at her: “I will go back, but allow me to inform you, my dear madam, that I’ll not drink another drop—Just to surprise you.” Mrs. Wellington shrugged her shoulders at this ancient threat and Jimmie stumbled back to his lair, whither men followed him. Feeling sympathy in the atmosphere, Little Jimmie felt impelled to pour out his grief: "Jellmen, I’m a brok’n-heartless man. Mrß. Well’n’ton Is a queen among women, but she has temper of tarant —’’ Wedgewood broke In: "I say, old boy, you’ve carried this ballast for three days now, wherever did you get it?" Wellington drew himself up proudly for a moment before he slumped back into himself. “WeH, you see, when I announced to a few friends that I was about to leave Mrs. Well’n’ton forever and that I was going out to —to —you know.’ "Reno. We know. Well?” "Well, a crowd of my friends got up a farewell sort of divorce breakfast — and some of ’em felt so very sad about my divorce that they drank a little too much, and the rest of my friendß felt so very glad about my divorce, that they drank a little too much. And, of course, I had to join both parties.” “And that breakfast,” said Ashton, “lasted till the train started, eh?” Wellington glowered back triumphantly. "Lasted till the train started? Jellmen, that breakfast is going yet!” CHAPTER XXII. In the Smoking Room. Wellington’s divorce breakfast reminded Ashton of a story. Ashton was one of the great That-Reminds-Me family. Perhaps it was to the credit of the Englishman that he missed the point of this story, even though Jimmie Wellington saw it through his fog, and Dr. Temple turned red and burled his eyes In the eminently respectable t>ages of the Scientific American. Ashton and Wellington and Fosdick exchanged winks over the Britisher’s stare of incomprehension, and Ashton explained it to him again In words of one syllable, with signboards at all the different spots. Finally a gleam of understanding broke over Wedgewood’s face and he tried to Justify his delay. “Oh, yes, of cawse I see It now. Yes, I rather fancy I get you. It’s awfully good, Isn’t It? I think I should have got it before but I’m not really myself; for two mawnings I haven’t had my tub." Wellington shook with laughter: "If you’re like this now, what will you be when you get to Sin san frasco—l mean Frinsansisco —well, you know what I mean." Ashton reached round for the electric button as If he were conferring a favor: "The drinks are on you, Wedgewood. I’ll ring.” And he rang. “Awf’lly kind of you,” said Wedgewood; "hut how do you make that out?" "The . man that misses the point, pagfT (or the drinks.” And he rang again. Wellington protested. “But I’ve Jolly well paid for all the drinks for two days." Wellington roared: "That’s.another point you’ve missed." And Ashton rang again, but the pale yellow individual who had always answered the bell with alacrity did not appear. “Where’s that Infernal buffet waiter?" grumbled. Wedgewood began to titter. "We were out of Scotch, so I sent him for some more.” “When?" "Two stations back. I fancy we must have left him behind." “Well, why In thunder didn't yon say s6?T Ashton roared. „ . "It quite escaped my mind,” Wedgewood grinned. “Rather good Joke on yon fellows, what?" "Well, I don’t see the point,” Ashton growled, but the triumphant Englishman bowled: “That’s where yon pay!" Wedgewood had his laugh to him-

self, for the other* wanted to murder him. Ashton advised a lynching, but the conductor arrived on the scene in time to prevent violence. Fosdick informed him of the. irretrievable loss of the useful buffet waiter. The conductor promised to get another at Ogden. Ashton wailed: “Have we got to sit here and die of thirst till then?" The conductor refused to "back up for a coon,” but offered to send in a sleeping-car porter aa a temporary substitute. As he started to go, Fosdick, who had been Incessantly consulting his watch, checked him to ask: “Oh, conductor, when do we get to the stateline of dear old Utah?" "Dear old Utah!" the conductor grinned. "We’d ’a’ been there already if we hadn’t ’a’ fell behind a little." "Just my luck to be late,” Fosdick moaned. ‘"lyhat you so anxious to be in Utah for, Fosdick?" Ashton asked, suspiciously. "You go on to ’Frisco, don’t you?” Fosdick was evidently confused, at the direct question. He tried to dodge it: "Yes, but —funny how things have changed. When we started, nobody was speaking to anybody except his wife, now—” "Now,” said Ashton, drily, "everybody’s speaking to everybody except his wife." "You’re wrong there," Little Jimmie interrupted. "I wasn’t speaking to my wife in the first place. We got on as strangersh and we’re strangersh yet Mrs. Well’n’ton is a—” “A queen among women, we know! Dry up,” said Ashton, and then they heard the querulous voice of the porter of their sleeping car: "I tell you, I don’t know nothin’ about the buffet business." The conductor pushed him in with a gruff command. “Crawl in that cage and get busy." “Still the porter protested: "Mista Pullman engaged me for a Bleepin’ car, not a drinkln’ car. I’m a berthmaker, not a mixer.” He cast a resentful glance through the window that served also as a bar, and his whole tone changed: “Say, is you goln’ to allow me loose amongst all them beautiful bottles? Say, man, if you do, I can’t guarantee my conduck.” “If you even sniff one of those bottles,” the conductor warned him, "I’ll crack it over your head.” “That won’t worry me none—as long as my mouf’B open.” He smacked his chops over the prospect of intimacy with that liquid treasury. “Lordy! Well, I’ll try to control my emotions —but remember, I don’t guarantee nothin’." ... The conductor started to go, hut paused for final instructions: “And remember —after we get to Utah we can’t serve any hard liquor at all.” "What’s that? Don’t they ’low nothin’ in that old Utah but ice-cream soda ?” "That’s about all. If you touch a drop, I'll leave you in Utah for life." “Oh, Lordy, I’ll be good!” The conductor left the excited blaak and went his way. Ashton was the first to speak: “Say, Porter, can you mix drinks?" The porter ruminated, then confessed: “Well, not on the outside, no, sir. If you-all is thirsty you better order the simplest things you can think of. If you want to Command anything fancy, Lord knows what you’d get. Supposin’ you wub to say, ‘Gimme a Tom Collins.’ I’d be just as liable as not to pass you a Jack Johnson." “Well, can you open beer?" "Oh, I’m a natural born beeropener.” “Rush It out then. My throat is as full of alkali dust as these windows.” The porter soon appeared with a tray full of cotton-topped glasses. The day was hot and the alkali dust very oppressive, and the beer was cold. Dr. Temple looked on It when it was amber, and suffered himself to be bullied into taking a glass. (TO BE CONTINUED.)

London as a Frenchman Bees It.

The little French boy has qvery opportunity of getting an engaging idea of London. In a recent volume of French and general geography, which has run into several editions, the compiler gives an English reading from the works of M. Enault, whoever he may be. And the little French boy is told concerning the London of this century that there are in the best parts of our unhappy city “whole streets formed of dens dug out of the soil, which itself was only a mass of rubbish." And again: “A little further on, bands of half-starved men without fire or shelter take refuge in gypsy vans, which vans are buried up to the axletree in mud.” People also sleep in wheelless cabs, for which they pay a rent of cent! a week. We Londoners should not have known anything about this if M. Enault had not told us! —London Chronicle.

Pre-Glacial Man.

The “pre-boulder clay man” found under the sheet of red crag formation of Suffolk, near Ipswich, In England, though tall and well shaped as the modern Englishman, resembles the ape-like Neanderthal man of a later age In the very flat and broad posterior part of the skull. He exhibits one peculiarity not found In any other fossil man of queerly shaped leg bones —the tibia and fibula. The report In the London Times says their significance “is-as yet inexplicable; they probably depend on the manner In which the legs were used in walk* tag." v

Diplomatic.

"All women are beautiful,” declares the leading’ photographer at England. That’s why he's the ' photographer.

MISS NELLIE SCHMIDT of Alameda. Cal., the first woman to swim Golden Gate strait at San Francisco and who also was the first woman to swim across San Francisco bay, has added to her laurels by swimming around the famous Seal rocks in the Pacific ocean off the Cliff house, San Francisco. The course was 200 yards short of a mile and was made in the remarkably fast time of 34 minutes and 50 seconds, against strong tides and treacherous current rips. ,

TELLS OF HORRORS

Terrible Experience of Wrecked Party Is Revealed. Woman and Child in Open Boat With Crew in Ice Off Cape Horn —Seventeen Men Lose Their Lives in the Disaster. London. —The terrible experience of a party of shipwrecked sailors who spent a week in an open boat in the icy neighborhood of Cape Horn are described in a letter which has just been received from Port Stanley, Falkland islands. The men were accompanied by the captain’s wife and child, and no fewer than six of the original occupants of the boat succumbed to cold and exposure before the exhausted survivors reached the Falkland Islands. At the same time comes the news that Captain Thomas, his wife and child and three sailors reached Liverpool on the Pacific liner Orepesa. During a storm which broke suddenly the large sailing ship Criccieth Castle, belonging to Carnarvon, met with disaster off Cape Horn. The rudder post gave way and the rudder damaged the sternpoat so much that the vessel was filling with water. The captain, Robert Thomas, his wife and son (aged four years), the second officer and 13 of the crew left the ship in the large lifeboat, while the first and third officers and five of the crew left in a smaller boat. The experience of the former party during the first night in the open boat was terrible, the captain describing it as the worst he had known during the 22 years of his seafaring life. That night, the captain thinks, the second boat must have been swamped, as nothing was seen of it afterward. Captain Thomas was washed out of the lifeboat, but was saved by his wife, who caught him by his clothing, enabling two of the men to pull him aboard. Three of the men died during the night and they were followed by three others before the survivors reached land, seven days later. Those who know any thing of the icy region around Cape Horn in winter can imagine the sufferings of the unfortunate people who were for seven days in an open boat, which, moreover, was leaking badly as the result of striking the ship’B side while It was being lowered. On the second day a Finn, a French cook and a Japanese died; on the third day a German and an Englishman died, and on the morning of the fourth day those who remained were horrified to find that during the night Another man, a Welshman, had died. By the fourth day nearly all who remained were frostbitten. All suffered agonies. Then the water supply gave out So exhausted were they that no one seemed to care what happened to him. All hope of rescue seemed to vanish, but on the seventh day an outlying island In the Falklaads was sighted. Fire was lighted as soon as they landed and the survivors were able to enjoy a drink of melted snow. But the relief afforded by the islet was only short lived, and the’ party put out to sea again in the hope of finding an inhabited island. This quest was attended by misfortunes, and the boat was blown out to sea and beyond sight of land. Ultimately Port Stanley was reached. Altogether 17 men perished. , ®* 0 .

Boy of 18 Supports Family.

Irwin, Pa. —Joseph Nellis, a fifteen-year-old boy employed in a mfne here. Is supporting two younger sisters and a brother in a shanty which he hf* rented. The boy's father recently disappeared. The mother la dead. Joseph lias a hard time, but he refuses ail offers of aid.

CALIFORNIA’S CHAMPION WOMAN SWIMMER

UNCOVER ANCIENT CEMETERY

Excavating for a Wine Cellars Italian Makes a Discovery of Hiatorical Value. Rome.—An ancient Christian cemetery has accidentally been discovered in the neighborhood of the remains of the Church of the Holy Apostles at Spoleto, In the province of Perugia. The church, one of the first Christian temples erected In that part of Italy contained the bones of many who suffered martyrdom under the Flavian emperors, but had not been used as a place of burial for more than 15 centuries. Since modern times, having been little more than a ruin, it passed as private property into the family of the Sinibaldi, of whom the present head, the Italian deputy of that name, decided to enlarge the extensive basement for use as a cellar for storing wine, he being a wine grower on a large scale. Excavations had hardly begun a few days ago, when one of the workmen struck a solid block of stone about three feet below the Burface, and this proved to be the cover of an ancient sarcophagus of unusual size. Twenty-one sarcophagi with massive covers in monolith were unearthed, all belonging to the third or fourth qentury, A. D. They were opened in the presence of a group of public officials and archaeologists from different parts of .Italy, and each was found to contain a skeleton in a perfect state of preservation.

TO SEND WIFE TO SCHOOL

Husband of Thirteen-Year-Old Girl Warned He Cannot Disobey the Education Laws. Philadelphia. —“You must send your wife to school until she is fourteen years old, or you will be arrested and fined," warned Magistrate Boyle after imposing a fine in the case of John Palasis, whose wife, Annie, is only thirteen years of age. The young wife and her father were arrested on a. warrant charging them with failure to comply with the compulsory education law. When asked why she did not attend school, Mrs. Palasis, who wore short dresses. Bald she had no time to go to school, as she had to get her husband’s meals and look after othef household duties.

AGED COUPLE IN BOX CAR

Former Missionaries Bhare Privations and Hardships—Are Found —i— In South Dakota. _ Jamestown, N. D.—Sharing privations and hardships with her husband, Mrs. K. W. Shepp was found in a box car in the Northern Pacific yards barn. She and her husband were traveling from South Dakota to Idaho, and had intended going the entire distance In the car in which they had loaded their few belongings. Cold weather, however, made the trip hard, and they were suffering greatly because of their scant protection from the elements. Both are more than sixty years old. They were formerly missionaries.

WATER TO CHRISTEN SHIP

New York W. C. T. U. Urges Libation From Niagara for Battleship New York. Ogdensburg, N. Y.—The New York state convention of the Woman’s Christian Temperance onion forwarded a resolution to the secretary of the navy, asking that the new battleship New' York be christened with water taken from Niagara falls. If the request la granted the onion will 'tarnish the water and the receptacle.

BLOND ESKIMOS LONG KNOWN

Old Revenue Cutter Captain B£ya Stories of {Burning Mountain Were Laughed At. CjTacoma, Wash. —Captain Fraficis Tuttle of the revenue service, retired, says that for thirty years or more stories of Stefansdon’s blond Eskimo tribe have been told by old-time whalers who were sometimes driven into Bankland by ice floes. Whalers were laughed at when they described Eskimos with red hair seen in the far north. In the early nineties Captain Tutr tie, commanding the cutter Bear, met the whaler Ballene, commanded by Captain Bert Williams, now residing at Irondale. Williams told Tuttle of a strange tribe in Bankland which came out to the whaler. Some of them went aboard. Williams could not understand their language and learned little about them. From his winter quarters Williams could see a burning mountain of coal. The native* led him to a place where he ob- • tained enough coal to supply his vessel that winter. By signs they made Williams understand that the great mountain had been burning for 200 years. Captain Tuttle believes Williams is the man of whom one tribe told Stefansson. During his thirty years of service on the Alaskan coast Captain Tuttle heard of blond tribes from otheV whalers, but the stories were generally given little credence.

GIRL ON TRIAL WINS SUITOR

Pays Fine of Girl Convicted of Theft, Proposes Marriage and Is Accepted. New York.—Eva Rioux, the demure French-Canadian girl who spent four strenuous days in the superior court at Bridgeport defending herself against* a charge of theft preferred by Mrs. C. E. Page of New York and Sound- Beach, is to become a bride within a week or so. Her trial resulted in a fine being imposed. A man who is said to be the owner of two Connecticut theaters and who listened to all of the evidence, paid her fine and then proposed marriage. His name is not divulged. He is forty-five and a bachelor. Miss Eva was all smiles when seen in the office of Mrs. T. Carnello, who had befriended her at the time of tha trial. "Ooui,” she replied to the question whether she was to be married. Then in broken English she expressed pleasure, Baying she had written home to get her parents’ consent, and if they agreed the marriage would take place at once. The man who is to marry her has already taken steps to reopen the case in the superior court and have Miss Eva’s reputation cleared-

ASKS DIVORCE, HAS A GUARD

St. Louis Woman Who Sues Husband Protected by Police —Escorted To and From Home. St. Louis, Mo. —Every morning for a week a policeman' called at 1422 Semple avenue, and after ringing the doorbell, met Mrs. Delia Monica Black and escorted her to the nearest street car line. There he put her aboard a car, tipped his cap and went his way. Every evening a policeman met Mrs. Black as she get off the car. returning from her work in a downtown millinery house, and saw her safely to her door. MrS. Black’s reason for asking the police escort was revealed when , she filed a divorce suit against Charles E. Black, proprietor of a drag store at Arlington and Ridge avenues. Mrs. Black told a reporter that she believed it necessary to protect herself on her way to and from her home. Black has refused to make any statement about the case, except to say he has hired a lawyer.