Evening Republican, Volume 16, Number 260, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 30 October 1912 — Page 2 Advertisements Column 1 [ADVERTISEMENT]

There appears to have been a bumper crop of fuzzy bats. Sunday sport still Continues to exact toll In human lives. It is a wonder that nobddy thought of clean money long ago. . The country is safe in spite of the <Ure predictions of certain politicians. It is possible to be a perfect daredevilin an aeroplane, but what is the use? If it were not for politics a lot of young lawyers would find existence dreary. What has become of the old fashioned joint debate between leading candidate? Some plutocrat should offer a prize for the encouragement of longevity among aviators. Not only does it hurt an oyster to be eaten alive, as Doc Wiley says, but It cannot talk back. Women’s dresses, we are told, are to be tighter. Gracious heaven! Can such a thing be possible? Artificial rubber is said y by an expert to be a failure —not able to stretch a point—so to speak. After a while perhaps Americans will learn to utilize their housetops as well as their sleeping porches. Even if abstaining from gossip will not remove superfluous hairs it will leave a sweeter taste In the mouth. It Is a sad world. You escape a scorching automobile by the skin of your teeth, only to run Into a candidate. After all, it Is only fair to attempt to make a man of a monkey, since so many monkeys have been made of men. Once more the last of the passenger pigeons has died- That bird will accomplish that feat once too often some day. Now it is explained why the small boy and the tramp are so healthy. A Boston physician says that soap Is a carrier of diseases. The dear little boys In the kinder gartens may be shy on some branches of useless knowledge, but they are learning to j sew nicely. It is hartlly reasonable to suppose that all the police in New York are bad, but the bad ones are most in the limelight just now. The New York milkman who offered to accept kisses In pay for his wares must have been dispensing the milk of human kindness. This is a grand year for fruits, but certain well-known gentlemen with cravings for office will remember it because of, its sour grapes. Toadstools caused the death of thirteen persons in Paris during the last season. Another proof of the unluckiness of the number thirteen. Despite all predictions of an early hard winter, it can be regarded as certain that navigation up Salt river will remain open until after Novem.ber 5. I . - Harvard surgeons have Installed a device that records heartbeats at hundreds of miles. Pooh! The ordinary love letter has been doing that for , aeons. W 7 hy Would it not be a good Idea for some one to seek to develop the commercial utility of the aeroplane rather than to display its circus possibilities? “Lots of Americans Are fools," says the Charleston (S. C.) News and Courier. This may be true, but the foreigner who says it is going to get into trouble. People who Insist on dancing the “grizzly bear” even when there Is danger of being shot for doing so may be said to have enthusiasm that is worthy of a better cause. A Chicago man, 6truck by lightning, was cured of his rheumatism for 24 hours. The method may be all right, but the difficulty of making it practical comes in securing your bolts on schedule. California scientists are endeavoring to find out whether the sun Is growing cold. This 1b the time of year when people who desire to make such a discovery are most likely to be successful. New Zealand has introduced a lettor meter by which mall is registered and paid for without the use of stamps. Must be rather inconvenient tpr each individual to have to lug a letter meter around. —.' 4 A Waukegan lady who has tried one reports that old bachelors do not make good husbands, because they are too firmly “set" in their ways. This only proves the correctness of the theory that the lady who expects to have a satisfactory husband must «ateh him and train him early.