Evening Republican, Volume 16, Number 213, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 5 September 1912 — Page 2 Advertisements Column 1 [ADVERTISEMENT]

▼acationers have no ambition U "come back.” ■.; . ■ •-•■■■ -■ : * Girla In tight skirts —well, the less ■aid about them the better. Dealers in evaporated eggs do not always succeed in evaporating the smell. Golf a rich man’s game? Nonsense! Just look at the number of poor players!/ 1 No matter what may be said about the weather man, 1t can not be denied that he is hot stuff. It’s a heap easier to denounce the bad habits of the other fellow than it is to renounce onv own! A man never enjoys his summer vacation so much as when he returns home to get a square meal. Speaking of refreshing subjects, a motoring party in the Alps was lost the other day in a snow drift. The gondoliers of Venice have gone out on a strike, leaving the public paddle its own canoe, so to speak. According to reports the ballot this fall in Oregon will be nine feet Jong, and yet women insist that they want It. Since a telephone girl is said to have won a prince, lots of girls wl!) practice saying “Timber, plee-us?” ia dulcet tones. A statistician tells us that the women of Paris outnumber the men by 200,000. Now we know why rich Americans like Paris. What brings the blush of shame to the Chicagoan’s cheeks is the taunt that the largest fish In Lake Michigan can be caught on a pinhook! Since a correspondent has retaliated with some heat, saying that man’s garb is Idiotic, we shall have to concede that at least it is slightly inartistic Some men are born enemies of mankind, an,d some develop the habit of getting their hair cut on Saturday afternoon. Observing the oddly unbecoming costumes affected by aviatrices, one marvels that any girl ever cherishes aspirations to fly. Every time we hear that a pleasure Doat has knocked a hole ,ln a battleship we are led to wonder why the government doesn’t build a fleet of pleasure boats. One thing which Berlin Is certain to do In 1916 is to dwarf Stockholm In Olympic crowds. The ten-to-one advantage In population settles that point far in advance. Over four thousand killed themselves In the United States last year. But, still, that left a fairly reassuring proportion of the population that yet believed life Is worth living. It is Interesting to read that a Housatonic woman dug twenty goodsized potatoes and three small ones from one hill a few days ago, but what was her husband doing meanwhile? Our army has adopted a new form of sword which Is said to be highly effective. We can picture a gallant officer, sword in hand, battling with a gatling gun at a distance of a mile and a half. A young woman in a New York waterside resort came near / being drowned by her hobble skirt. Still, Btyle is not worth being a cause if it is not to have its martyrs, as well as its votaries. A New Jersey man claims that he has perfected an invention whereby peas can be made to grow by electricity. That may help some, but wouldn’t it be more effective if he could induce electricity to kill the weeds? - The saw fly is cutting the'leaves oil New England’s maples and the spruce bud moth is attacking the balsams, which are needed for pillows and for Christmas trees. Still nobbdy is doing anything to increase the number of the birds. A man arrested in Chicago for being drunk confessed that his wife, a milliner, had sent him out to buy thread and he had spent the money for drink. His wife pleaded to save him from jail, on the ground that she needed him home to do the housework. . Great excitement has been caused in London because the king and queen went to a vaudeville show. What they want now is to get up a convention on the American plan if they wish to be up to date in their amusements and want some excitement which is really worth while. Shoemakers are proverbially ill shod, but it would seem as if the men in the Pittsburg factory who struck because while the/ 5 turned 4ut 600 bathtubs a \ 4frtfr they bad none to use" themselves bad something to complain of.