Evening Republican, Volume 16, Number 138, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 8 June 1912 — Page 4 Advertisements Column 4 [ADVERTISEMENT]

The Price. Client —This bill of yours is exorbitant. There are several items In it that I don’t understand at iftL" Lawyer—l am perfectly willing to explain it. but the explanation will cost yon SIOO. After being taken in to see his new 3&by sister, Henry, aged four, was very non-committal. A little later nis mother sent for him and said: ' Henry, what do you think of our “Why, mother,” he replied very seriously, "she’s all brown and wrinkled. I’ll bet you got Btuck with an old one.” 1 j! Pendleton —What are the two greatMt wishes of a medical student? ' Kefer —Give it up. What are they? Pendleton —To put “Dr." before his »wn name and “Dr." after the names es other people. “In the game of life,’ observed the literary editor, "it is always—’’ ’ "I wish you wouldn’t call life a game,” interrupted the information editor. “Why not?” “Because it introduces the' idea of chance. In the great scheme of creation ” "I with you wouldn’t speak of creation as a scheme,” irritably interposed the literary editor. "That introduces the idea that creation is a frame-up." “Some men are so queer.” "And you are going to tell me of one particularly queer one?” “YeS. It’s Mr. Barberton. Bis wife used to beg him for nickWfc. and dimes, and naw he’s cheerfully pay* log her a hundred a week for alimony.” “Say, dad, why did motner join the Browning club? She isn’t interested In peotry, is she?” "Nope, but the club meets on Fridays, and she hasn’t anything Mae to do on Fridays.” “But will your father give his oonaantf’ . "Don’t worry about that Father is not going to waste time opposing a summer engagement” Hilly—ln this picture like your father? -v" Tiny—Of course not, silly! R is Use father when he has his picture —JPurCIL a- '•* /■ r' ,iv . . „ 'it. '*■ I