Evening Republican, Volume 16, Number 127, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 27 May 1912 — Page 2 Advertisements Column 1 [ADVERTISEMENT]

The Daily Republican Every Day Except Sunday HEALEY A CLARK, Publishers. RENSSELAER, INDIANA. Wireless has done much to minimize the terrors of the seas. Incubators have nearly driven the setting hen out of business. Even the wireless has to send back now and then the signal "line busy.” "Get ’em while they’re hot” applies to delegates as well as to frankfurters. The man who does the most kicking is generally in need of a kicking himself. The Turks have lost their base in the Aegean sea, where Icarus lost his balance. A Frenchman now claims he was in the house long before the clock struck 24. The boat-rocking idiot has started on his annual mutderous joke with the result of a life lost It is too early to pick a pennant winner yet; also it is too early in the season to give up hope. “American women are timid,” remarks Dr. Colt The doctor never has attended a bargain sale. Any fond mother will agree that however much it costs to keep the baby, it is worth the money. One of the chief faults to be found with gentle spring is that it generally carries a flareback up its sleeve. A* woman who was sent to jail for having ten husbands probably was found guilty of restraint of trade. A western woman, in a $20,000 breach-of-promise ' suit, compromised for $750, but she had the last word. New York is trying to secure a street car that is easy to enter if one be not a ballet dancer or high stepper. The report that the peanut crop has been ruined Is another blow at the ancient and honorable game of baseball. Reports that Wu may not come back after all, will be welcomed by those who have had to answer his questions. The Mississippi river Is not a trustworthy irrigation agent It is inclined to overdo the work every spring. A California man has secured a divorce because his wife went through his pockets. Cut this out and put it in your pocket A burglar appeared as a character witness in a New York case probably to prove the statement that there is honor among thieves. A Philadelphia man has discovered -a way to live on $1 a week. Thus is solved the problem how to attend all the games this season. The prince of Wales is going to take lessons in aviation. Some people find that even the next to the top step of a throne isn’t high enough. People who have nothing more important to do are beginning to argue about the respective merits of "Ty” Cobb and “Honus” Wagner. At San Diego, Cal., the police have seized 1,200 pounds of dynamite. We assume that the seizing was done without undue Impulsiveness. ■_ The sultan of Morocco is said to be taking care of 3,000 refugees in his Tangier palace. Our flat used to look like that in World’s Fair year. A Trenton (N. J.) man claims that he has not been able to sleep for 30 years. Why doesn’t he Indulge in a little run down to Philadelphia? A physical culture artist tells us that swimming is the safest exercise, but even if It is, the man who rocks the boat never will become popular? A convention of shoe manufacturers has decided that women’s feet are growing larger, and a new and, improved list of sizes Is to be adopted. An inventor claims that he has evolved a safe and sane aeroplane, but there are those who labor under the Impression that there hain’t no sech thing. An eccentric Frenchman has left behind a collection of buttons valued at $40,00. His life was one continual game of "Button, button; who’s got the button?” ; A Cincinnati woman advocates a curfew law which shall be applicable to men only. When the home can be made happy by chasing the man to it we shall cheerfully admit that the highest achievement of civilization has been recorded. An intoxicated Gothamite was arrested for celebrating too riotously the not-altogether joyful occasion of his acquisition of a cemetery lot. The police probably held such an object as running the celebrating idea into the ground.