Evening Republican, Volume 16, Number 24, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 27 January 1912 — Page 2 Advertisements Column 1 [ADVERTISEMENT]

It’s almost as easy to give good ad-' Tice as it is not to follow it Among the things that we were not thinking of ordering is a new alphabet ’Persons with no other form of amusement can watch the days grow .longer. ' • <#£&***=**?' - - 11 "" 1 It ip difficult for some men to be good when they have a good chance to be otherwise. . A fresh egg of the season comes Straight, from a fresh chamber of the cold storage warehouse. St Louis girl, twelve years old, wants a divorce. Some of them certainly acquire the habit early. . Germany has seventeen dirigible war balloons and England is fortunate in being too busy to worry. A Connecticut woman found a diamond in a leg of lamb. And she wasn’t anywhere near Wlnsted at the time. A girl umpired a baseball game in California the other day. -Those California women certainly are heroines. fAn Imperial edict in Pekin order* the cutting off of queues. Switches . and rats ought to be cheaper next year. - A divorce law has been passed in the Philippines, but it will be a long time before Manila achieves the fame of Reno.

Every time a Mexican patriot tires of work and longs for a little easy money, he organizes a new “(revolution.” Many a man who believes In doing the greatest good to the greatest number regards number one as the greatest number. It has been decided by a court that collecting tips Is begging. Thus the idemocratizatlon of the bench proceeds delightfully. A' Philadelphia physician says that mince pie, taken In moderation, will cure insomnia. About how many triangles, doctor? .New York’s new..... “whispering •whistle” for trains would be a great Institution to introduce to Willie, the gifted office boy siffleur. The trouble with the man who goes to.see a doctor generally is that he wishes to be cured in a day of ills it has taken him years to acquire. The Bostonian who claims that the earth Is flat would have been considered a wise and conservative man in the days of Christopher Columbus. Jack rabbits with horns are said to be plentiful In the grand old state of Texas. Since when has Wlnsted, Conn., been transplanted to Texas? Vesuvius has been throwing mud again. And yet people who live in the neighborhood probably think that Home, Sweet Home is a great little, '"‘ifittg. ; - • ■ . " •. - If you are a hotel guest, don’t give your only pair of trousers to a bellboy, and then go to bed, for a cry of t‘fire!” would put you In a predicament. i “An eastern highbrow asserts that we are losing our sense of smell.” "which we may infer that he doesn't live in a boiled cabbage neighborhood. The household furniture of the future may be made of concrete, as Tom Edison says, but it will be necessary to hire a derrick and a freight train on moving day. ii i.ii'ii ■ ' l A jury awarded S3OO damages to a woman who sued because a man failed to marry her after sixty proposals. That places a handy and exact price upon a proposal. The'lrony of fate appears to have been demonstrated in the case of the famous surgeon who was operated on for appendicitis when his trouble was caused by gallstones. It is announced that shoes are to cost more, and the family mad wffl perhaps feel, grateful that a long succession of such announcements has aoade him somewhat callons. ' 1 • Reindeer meat is to be shipped from Alaska to Chicago, so that It may be served in the restaurants- in Chicago. Unless It is going to be a good deal cheaper than steak it will not be lik«!y to cause much of a sensation

Motor cars in New York last year have killed 89 persons and injured 85S. Strikes us that it is safer to be a guide, or A football player than an innocent bystander : ln N*rw Ybrk. j g|pndge Mulqueen of New York, on ||£>f|ng‘. told tttat some one bad stolen Jthe tfottsers fff a Tombs prisoner, ob* iserved: "You would better make A ■most thorough investigation of this, jit would be a great calamity to find itbieves in tbe Tombs.” Some would isay, on tbe contrary, that that is just (the place for thieves.