Evening Republican, Volume 15, Number 202, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 26 August 1911 — Page 2 Advertisements Column 1 [ADVERTISEMENT]

’ j*- ■ . The Daily Republican Bvary Day Kxcep*. Sunday HCALEY < CLARK, Publisher*. RENSSELAER, INDIANA. Water your horses! What are the hot waves saying? Animals suffer as. well as humanity. Th* flyless city Is an Irridescent dream. What has become of the old fashioned sea serpent? Alaskan ice is Just now more popular than Alaskan coat Paris has declared against statues tn frock coats. It may prefer pajamas. Some think an electric light bulb throws out more heat in summer than in winter. A Worcester boy killed 1,119,000 files in a contest, but they will never be missed. What has become of the old-fash-ioned man who carried a palm-leaf fan In summer? » Do not try to invent a new excuse for going to the ball game. Any old excuse will do. Doctor Wiley says that men who smoke are liable to sunstroke Do your smoking at night. A New York woman who lost >I,OOO Joked about it. Evidently she didn’t have a husband to support Aviators now fly across the English channel before breakfast as an appetizer. It is a bumdrum trip. I ■ ■ We are told that a dog in St Louis has learned to smoke. He shows as much intelligence as his teacher. A hog out In Oregon ate its owner’s coat and >7OO in real money and seemed to thrive on the rich diet One of the dangers of being married in an aeroplane is that the first falling out is likely to result disastrously. -Aviator Atwood is going to try to fly from New York to Chicago. Il is sincerely hoped that he may find the flying good. One way to keep cool in summer is to avoid summer resorts.' One is likely to be prostrated when one ponders on the bill. A New York boy who walked aw’ay from home eight years ago to seek his fortune has spoiled a good story by umiking back. jiAAAAsfiftisement reads: “Wanted -~A.gjht to paste labels on.” No selfMssacttsg girl would care to have tabSto pasted on her. A physician advises us to eat onions and become healthy. We know from personal experience that garlic I* productive of great strength. A man in New Jersey killed his sweetheart with an “unloaded” pistol. So history, unmindful of the tragedy of IL keeps on repeating itself. We have congealed winter In the form of ice to temper the summer; now why not bottle up the beat and release it on a cold day next winter? A bullfrog may be a champion fly killer, but he is not what might be called an ideal pet. especially if there are nervous women around the house A committee of Chicago teachers has decided that stenographers should be taught enough of English to enable them to correct the boss’s blunders. " A French scientist has devised an Instrument to forecast thunder storms but our amateur weather prophets cling to the old. reliable rheumatism. One man at least has felt the oppression of great wealth —the employe of the San Francisco mint who was buried under $9,000,000 in gold coin* * An Omaha debating society has decided that a horse is more desirable than an automobile Notwithstanding this we presume people will still go □n mortgaging their homes for the latter. f A Wisconsin *Judge has ruled that a man must provide his wife with false teeth If she want* them. This, however. is Interesting only to the women who want them. An Ohio man boasts that he can rock the cradle with one hand and button his wife's dress with the other. We presume also that the gentleman ha* learned to speak distinctly with a mouth full of pins — —.■ —. Judging by the English, channel tvtatlon will soon become as common a* a ride on a lumber wagon In the conntry. Al ' - Collector Loeb has seized >130,000 worth of funs. No one, however, caree what become* of furs in the present weather. We see by the papers that a Philadelphia woman 80 years old Is taking cornet lessons Evidently she has developed a terible grudge against her