Evening Republican, Volume 14, Number 244, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 13 October 1910 — 2 BOOZERS, 1 DRINKWATER [ARTICLE]

2 BOOZERS, 1 DRINKWATER

New York City Directory, Recently Issued, Records Many Other Freak Names. New York. —One of the six best sellers, the city directory, is out again. The entertaining little volume contains two Laffs and one Tear. The original Mr. Smith has 3,318 relatives this year. Brown runs second with 1,600, and poor Jones has only 850. Temperance people may be glad there are only i Drinkers, 1 Booz, 2 Boozers and 1 Drinkwine. Mr. Pickle may be included, but Mr. Drinkwater balances the account. Looking closer we find 30 Beers, 10 Schnapps and 16 Seltzers. There are 9 Batts. Passing on to the next cage one sees 2 Beans in front of 8 Bears, 24 Beavers <&nd 4 Mules. Near them are 130 Cranes. 4 Ravens, 15 Robins, 9 Ratts and 80 Fishes. They are surrounded by numerous Hoggs, Goats, Plggs and Wolfs, one Rabbit and a Cow. The latter is a policeman, which is appropriate, as policemen in slang are “bulls.’* There is just one Catt. There are five times as many Wilds as Wooleys. Out of 11 names there are 4 Losers, 6 Winners and 1 Even.