Evening Republican, Volume 14, Number 140, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 13 June 1910 — Advice for the Waiter. [ARTICLE]

Advice for the Waiter.

Jack Barrymore dropped into a Broadway restaurant the other day and fate assigned to him a waiter who, to quote the actor, was "solid Ivory from the chin up.” Failing to get anything he ordered, he at last lost patience. “Waiter," he said, “you are the ultimate thing in punk dispensers of gastronomic provender. Why dpn’t you chuck this job and try piccolo playing at the opera?” "I no can play-a da peecalo,** said the waiter. "That’s all right,” replied Barrymore. "Why waste all your incompetence in one place?”—Success Magazine. - The bachelor who is afraid of falling in love should take put an accident policy.