Democratic Sentinel, Volume 20, Number 50, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 18 December 1896 — REED THIS! [ARTICLE]

REED THIS!

An Odd Complication of Congressional Names. A Washington paper has been studying the list of newly-elected Congressmen and has this to say about it: “From over in Maryland comes Dr. Booze, and, while there may be no significance whatever in this close conjunction, the name of the representative in the very next district is Mudd. Maryland also sends a Barber and a Baker to the next House. A Cooke is found in the Illinois delegation, a Gardener in New Jersey, a Plowman in Alabama, a Cowherd in Missouri, a Bishop in Michigan, a Brewer in Ohio, two Coopers, one from Texas and the other from Wisconsin; two Taylors, one from Ohio and the other from Alabama; four Smiths, two from Michigan and one each from Illinois and Arizoha. A Miller comes from West Virginia, but Illinois furnishes Mills. Illinois also has a Hunter; New Jersey and North Carolina each a Fowler. But Pennsylvania contributes Robbins. “The little New England State of Rhode Island sends a Bull, Virginia a Lamb, North Carolina a Martin, Mississippi a Fox, Missouri a Cooney, and Ohio a Kerr, while a Skinner comes from North Carolina, and a Packer from Pennsylvania. There is a Fischer in the New York delegation, but the only thing for him to catch is Sauerherring of Wisconsin. Fruit, too. is scarce, there being only one Berry, from Kentucky. “Congress is a large body in itself, but it has only a Foote in New York and a Tongue in Oregon. A whole Mann is in Illinois, however, and there is another Handy in Delaware. There is a Moody in Massachusetts, a Minor in Wisconsin, and a Young in Virginia and Pennsylvania, and, above all, a Bland in Missouri. New York appropriates to itself all the Payne, North Carolina all the Love, and Missouri all the Joy. Utah is represented by a King, Illinois by a Prince, and the pedple of lowa by their Cousins.

“The silver Moon from the Tennessee mountains looks down peacefully upon a Hill in Connecticut, a Marsh in Illinois, near which is planted a Cannon that has seen much service, a Flood in Virginia, a Beach in Ohio, an Eddy in Minnesota, a Strait in South Carolina, and a Hull of long standing in lowa, while it sheds a bright Ray upon the State of New York. “Color lines are not sharply drawn, for there are only Browns in Ohio and North Carolina, White in the latter State, and both White and Jett In Illinois. “A Bell from Colorado may ring loudly in California and Sweet and Low in New York. Pennsylvania sends two fine-look-ing Stones, both of whom have been here before, while Vermont, which has such an abundance of fine marble, sends only Grout. Three good Walkers will be in the next House, one from Massachusetts and two from Virginia, to say nothing of Strode from Nebraska. The Little man from Arkansas may offset Grow in Pennsylvania. “Messrs. Robb, Steele and Gamble would hardly be a success as a firm in any other business than bank breaking or train wrecking in either Missouri, Indiana or South Dakota. Should they decide to divide their Gaines in Tennessee they might Settle in Kentucky, or possibly in North Carolina, after a Sharp contest. Should any of the members of Congress desire to indulge in the national game they may use the Ball, which will be sent here by Texas. Illinois will bo sure to make a safe Hitt.”