Democratic Sentinel, Volume 20, Number 20, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 22 May 1896 — The Advance Agent. [ARTICLE]

The Advance Agent.

Speaker Heed is growing very sour over the prospects of McKin ley at Bt. Louis. Ho says he made McKinley when he, as speaker of the house, ngj oiu od the major chairman of the wayß and moans committee. The speaker grows humorous when any one suggests to him that MoKinley is the “adH vance agent of prosperity." “Advance agent of prosperity,” said he. “Humph; when I was a boy the advance agent of the oircus would go through the country and cover the sides of barns and fences with the most gorgeous posters of what the circus would be. Thtre would be a long procession of knights in gold and silver armor, and ladies bpdecked in silks and dtamonds, mounted on beautiful Arabian steeds. There would be huge elephants, tigers, lions, camels, hippopotamuses and such, enough to stock a wilder*ness “Whop the circus came, it was the usual little old one-riug affair, with the measly, flop-eared, slabsided elephant, a mangy lion and a one-humped camel. “It never came up to the show bills, but there|was always at least one first-class acrobat who could ride two horses at once.’

The Anatomy of Conviction. An esteemed correspondent in Orange, puzzled by the conrradictoiy utterances of Maj. McKinley on the financial question, and unable to find anywhere in the major’s speeches any evidence of definite convictions on the subject, asks us to tell him where the major really stands We do not know. Nobody knows. Map McKinley himself does not know. To stand anywhere requires something more than two legs and two feet; or one leg and a cane cr crutch; or a feLce to lean against. It requires also a backbone, and the Napoleon of Canton, 0., has about as much backbone as a chocolate eclair.—N. Y. Sun.