Democratic Sentinel, Volume 20, Number 2, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 17 January 1896 — The Comic Side of the News. [ARTICLE]

The Comic Side of the News.

An Oswego girl has been arrested for embezzling SII,OOO. The new woman seems to be a few laps ahead of the old man. A New York paper has an editorial on “How to Humanely Kill Kittens.” Why not kill them just as you murder the English language? The Sultan’s curiosity is getting the better of his judgment. When the allied navies begin to play the shell game he'd better keep out of it. Mrs. Margaret Mather-Pabst probably will return to the stage: let us hope that Mr. Margaret Mather-Pabst will retire from - it now forever. Camphor has been cornered and prices have more than doubled lately. Somebody is laying up treasures where moth and rust doth corrupt. The New York Sun suggests that “toothbrush” ought to be “teethbrush,” perhaps. Perhaps so; but how about eyesglasses, fingersbowl, feetball and hairscut?