Democratic Sentinel, Volume 19, Number 38, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 27 September 1895 — Page 6

MUSTER DAYS OF OLD.

festival in which our grandfathers DELIGHTED. MHH. Laws of the States-What a Millti am an Was Required to Hare aa Master Day—The Amenities of the Occasion. Source of Mirth. There are man; elderly men still living M m« country who remember the “masla days” of half a century ago. and what events they were in the course of

the year to those country districts whoso local happenings were few and comparatively unimportant. All or nearly all the States had militia laws, and though for the most part these were a dead letter •a the statute books, there were from time te time efforts made to carry them out by assembling as many of the male population as could be induced to come on a stated day for the nonanal purpose of drill. Theoretically every inan of militia age was bound to come, but practically nobody came who did not feel like it, and those who did drilled much as they pleased, which was not very much, the most of the day being spent in bartering, horse lacing, or other ways familiar to the country folk of that day when they got together. In fact, in not a few parts of the country, particularly in the South, the Wiring and fall muster days were made semi-annual fetes, in which the originnl purpose of the gatherings was quite lost sight of in the diversions they inspired. According to the militia laws of most of the States, there were company musters at least twice a year; often these were held quarterly, while once a year there was a regimental or brigade muster, at mae central town in the district, which was indeed a very grand occasion, and gave an opportunity to tiie regimental •ad brigade officers for the display of all their finery. These opportunities, however, golden as they were, did not occur •ften enough to fix themselves in the popular mind as did the company muster, and whenever muster day is mentioned in our earlier annals, unless otherwise specified, the company muster is understood to be meant Legally, every man was not only bound to be present, but was bound to come properly equipped for military duty, or, as oae such law specified, “with one guu and a sufficient ramrod and bayonet, with two flints, one powder horn, one bag -if ballets, one haversack with two days’ provisions, one belt.” and various other articles necessary to the equipment of a soldier. As a matter of fact, however, when the company actually assembled for drill, military equipments were conspicuous by their absence. If there were

THE COLONEL.

any muskets with bayonets, they were probably relics of the war of independence, while the majority of the company were provided with ordinary rifles or fowling pieces, though an occasional old-fash-ioned blunderbuss put in an appearance, and not a few, in default of guns, had hoe handles, walking canes and cornstalks. Those who carried firearms, as a rule, were also provided with powder horns and bags of bullets; a few had belts, but

THE PRINCIPAL REFRESHMENT STAND.

«f the haversacks with provisions there was not a trace, since most lived within Mwy reach of their own homes, and could see so use in carrying victuals to the muster «»ly to carry them back again. Neither was any attempt made at uniform, save in the case of some revolutionary veteran or soldier of 1812, who was proud S t his military record and glad of the ehaace to sport his uniform. As to the ■set, each wore what he had, or what •leased him best, and next to the man in regimentals would stand a bold militia man in his shirt sleeves and with but one —ponder, while beyond him would be ■i without coats, men vith straw hats, with til hanging down berool” hats, the brims ire incongruous only who are looking for te militiamen of our le accustomed to noi Not daddies themdandyism in others, i “\»oHed shirt” tho

man with a pair of shining boobs, or the man with tight-fitting gloves, would have been regarded much as a sensible, welldressed mas of the present day regards a dude. They put on no airs themselves; they would tolerate no airs in others. They lived plainly, dressed plainly, and talked as plainly as 'they dressed and lived. Each company elected its own officers, the most popular man in the crowd being the captain. Holding his office as the result of his popularity it was naturally expected that this officer would not be too hard on the men; that is to say, that hs would drill them no longer than was absolutely necessary to comply with the law, and if he saw his way clear to dispense with everything but the roll-call, so much the better, for then there would be the

COMPANY DRILL.

more time left for the other business of the day. The captain generally kept this matter in mind, too, and the drilling that was done was frequently of a perfunctory and nominal character. The muster day could be at once distinguished from all other days by the most casual visitor to the district or village where the muster was to take place. Early in the morning countrymen would begin to arrive, some on horseback some on foot, three out of five attended by one or more dogs, generally curs of very low

degree. As soon as the arrivals had put up their horses, by hitching them to a convenient bough in the grove that was always near the “training ground,” they proceeded to “refresh” at the country store, and then joining their friends in the grove near by, began the discussion of topics of live interest, such ns the condition of the growing crops, the state of local politics, the probabilities of nutional issues, and such other matters of moment as occurred to them at the time ns worthy of consideration. The discussions were not without heat and fervor, and occasionally a difference of opinion took place among friends that could only be settled by an appeal to arms. In such cases a ring was formed, and the friends of the disputants standing by to see fair play, the difficulty was speedily adjusted by the nse of nature’s weapons. No prize was offered, save the consciousness of victory well earned, but this was enough, and when the bottle was over, and one of the contestants had cried “enough,” there was no doubt in the mind of the bystanders as to which was the better man. The rules of the prize ring were not in the least regarded in these amateur contests for victory. A little of everything was allowed. The fighters bit, kicked, scratched, gouged, pulled hair, struck anywhere they conld, and in short went into the contest, not for the purpose of observing a set of rules, but of winning a victory. About such places there were always noted characters who appeared to better advantage at muster than anywhere else. Sixty yearo ago, in East Tennessee, there was a notable fighter named Joe Collins. Joe was always spoiling for a fight, and rarely allowed a muster day to pass with-

out one. His usual costume was a pair of linsey-wolsey unmentionables, a pair of moccasins, a wool bat and a shirt of the same material, worn open at the neck. When Joe nad a little difference of opinion with any one which be deemed it desirable to settle at once, he caught his shirt at the back of his neck, gave it a fling that sometimes threw it ten steps away, and was ready for the battle. The local politician was another character who made himself prominent at the musters. They were notable occasions for making votes, and when the election was not distant, the candidates were always numerous. • The qualifications for electioneering were somewhat different then, it is true, but the principle was the same. The! candidate of those days was an adept in “shooting for beef,” in pitching quoits and in various other amusements of that kind, and resorted to any of them to make himself popular, always, however, first and last, relying on his treating abilities to clinch whatever popularity he might be able to gain by other means. He might be canvassing for a

State or county office, or only for the captaincy of the company at the next election. but the means were the same. The muster was generally a holiday for

the colored folks, and well did they improve it. Dressed in their best, they flocked to the scene, and enjoyed the military maneuvers as much or even more than the sisters and other female relatives of the hardy veterans. But their enjoyment was not confined to looking at the soldiers. In the intervals of military evolutions, they danced to the music of a solitary fiddle, and no matter how great the heat of the sun or how profuse the perspiration that poured down their sable skins, they never allowed such trifles as heat or perspiration to interfere with their pleasure. Among their number, however, were always some who had an eye to business, and on every muster ground an old “mammy,” with a little stand of gingercakes, apples, soda water or watermelons, was a familiar figure. To the expert in military affairs the muster days were a source of boundless mirth, but for all that they had their uses. They kept up a military spirit in; the people at a time when a military spirit was a necessity. A country born nmid the clash of arms naturally turned towards the profession of arms, and the fact that we did not become a nation of soldiers was due to other causes. In the early days, Indian fighting was a matter of daily occurrence all along the frontier, and some show of military organization was an absolute necessity. While tho Indian wars were on, in the districts most exposed to Indian raids, the militia musters were stern realities, but as adventurous men gradually pushed the frontier further on to the West, the districts left behind found the militia drill a superfluity; little by little it was converted

THE RETURN.

from a military to a social use, and the muster was made the excuse for the fete. It was in their later or degenerate days that the musters excited the ridicule of the looker-on, but it should not be forgotten that they were not the less ridiculous to those engaged in them, and that seldom, even by the participants, were they taken seriously. So long as soldiers were really needed, militia training was an important matter, and looked after with sedulous care, but when every one felt

THE BAYONET AT HOME.

that there was no need for drilling, that any number of troops that might be necessary for the defense of the country could be raised in a month, no one could see any payticular necessity for drilling in the sun, and so the muster day, with its legal provisions of bayonets and flints, haversacks and bags of bullets, quietly passed into disuse, and finally almost into oblivion.

Didn’t Like Mark Twain’s Stories.

About this time Mark Twain came to visit us, and he had a habit of making midday lunch his principal meal, so when 6 o’clock dinner came he would walk up and down the room, crossing It diagonally, and telling us the most amusing stories while we ate our dinner. He always put on low-heeled slippers for this promenade, and something about the singularity of the proceeding as a whole inspired Snap with distrust. He followed Mr. Clemens up and down, up and down, the room, occasionally sniffing at the low-heeled slippers; and when a louder burst of laughter than usual greeted some of the delightful stories, Snap would growl and try to worry the peripatetic footgear, until Mr. Clemens became conscious of him, and slowly turned a wondering consideration upon him.—St Nicholas.

The Speed of Electricity.

The speed of electricity under the most favorable conditions is now established to be 180,000 miles a second. What this enormous speed implies Is somewhat dimly suggested by an Illustration recently used by the eminent scientist Sir Robert Bell. Suppose that a row of telegraph posts 25,000 miles long were erected around the earth at the equator. Suppose that a wire were stretched upon these posts for this circuit of 25,000 miles, and that then another complete circuit was taken by the same wire around the same posts, and then another and yet another. In fact, let the wire be wound no fewer than seven times completely about this great globe. We should then find that an electric signal sent Into the wire at one end would accomplish the circuit In one second of time.—St. Louis GlobeDemocrat. At last accounts the wonjan who started the shirt waist fashion had more followers than the Lord.

A SIDE ISSUE.

RESENTED AN INSULT.

Coney Grain Entertained the Servants at Hons-; of a Snob. Many are the good ttories told of Mr. Comey Grain, says * London paper. He was a man of courtly dignity and no one knew better than he how to resent an impertinence, whether directed against himself personally or against the profession to which he beionged.’He was engaged on one occasion to entertain a large party of guests at a country house. He traveled down from town in the afternoon, as directed, by train, which landed him at his destination just as the guests were assembling for dinner. Instead of being received in the drawing room, however, Mr. Grain was conducted to the butler’s private room, and there, while the house party was dining upstairs, his dinner was served. Mr. Grain said nothing, but as soon as he had fortified himself against his return journey he called all the servants who happened to be at liberty into the butler's room, apologized to them for the absence of a piano, and, doing the best he could without one, he proceeded to entertain the amazed but delighted domestics with quips and jests and songs selected at random. He never, perhaps, had a more appreciative audience. Then he called for his fly. As he was preparing to get into it a pompous flunkey came down to the butler’s room with the message that “dinner was hover, and would Mr. Grain now come up to the drawing room and give his hentertainment?” To which Mr. Grain replied: “Give your master my compliments, and tell him that as I was sent to the servants' hall I naturally concluded it was the servants I was engaged to entertain, and am going back to town by the next train.” He did It, too. And the story was told all over the eountry.

Queer French Law.

There is a law in France which embitters the life of every dramatic author, as it confers upon every French citizen the right of having a novel or play immediately suppressed by the police if his name happens to be mentioned in it. In their anxiety to avoid unpleasantness the parodists of the Cluny Theater decided to designate the characters in a recent piece by numbers. The effect thus produced is somewhat peculiar, as, for instance: “Ah! charming 132, you are the most adorable of all women." “And you a flatterer, Count 18.” While the two were thus exchanging compliments an elderly gentleman suddenly appears and calls out in a voice of thunder: “I have caught you now, Count 18! Are there any cowards in your family?” “Gracious!” whispered Count 18, trembling in his shoes. “Gracious! Duke 53.” “Seventy-four!” exclaims the Duke, “turn this gentleman out!” But at this point a fellow in the audience springs to his feet. “That is really too bad!” he shouts in the direction of the stage. “I will send you a summons.” The Duke answers in surprise: “What have you to complain of? Seventy-four is only a number.” “That’s just it. It Is the very number I bore when in jail, and I am not going to be degraded by having a servant dubbed with it.” Everybody had to give in to that argument, says the Pittsburg Dispatch. It was the law. The play was stopped there and then.

Barbarous Tongue.

Most people have heard the word “Yiddish”—a corruption of the German Judisch, meaning Hebrew. It is pretty generally known also that Yiddish Is a jargon made up of Polish and German words with strays from other languages, and that it is spoken by Polish and Russian Jews. But how ■many know that this uncouth dialect Is spoken in New York City by no less than a hundred thousand people, that It can be read in six dally newspapers, and is spoken at three theaters? It Is a striking fact that those who speak this barbarous tongue cling to It with tenacity. They are the weaklings among our immigrants; they have neither the physical nor the mental traits to fit them to become co-founders of a sturdy and self-reliant race. Yet It Is precisely these people who cling the most closely to foreign speech and foreign ways. There is a sense In which the old party cry of “America for the Americans” has a just meaning. Not that we are to exclude from America the worthy, or to hold prejudice against those born In other lands. The Indiscriminate selfishness of the cry as thus interpreted rightly led to its political failure. But in the sense that all Americans, whether native-born or not, should strive to be in harmony as to language, customs and patriotism, we should at least be all Americans for America.

Hunting the Moose.

Thanks to the fact that the moose Is rather solitary in his habits, quick-wit-ted and keen of eye, ear and nostril In detecting danger, he is not destined to he exterminated so easily as the more stupid bison, caribou and elk. Rarely, Indeed, does the hunter find more than a family of moose together, even in the dead of winter, when they “yard up” in a given locality for days or weeks at a time. By reason of his great size, his savory flesh, his much-prized head, and the difficulty of killing him, this animal has always been very attractive to sportsmen and naturalists, and pot-hunters also. As a result, our leading scientific museums now possess more and finer mounted specimens of this species than of any other large game animal of America except the bison. The museums of Washington, New York;, and the University of Kansas possess magnificent groups that are lasting monuments to - the greatness of Alces Americanus, and a credit to our country besides.—St. Nicholas.

Proposed Facsimile of the St. Louis.

A proposition has reached the management, of the Cotton States and International Exposition from Herbert Saunders & Co., of London, offering to build on the lake a sac simile of the transatlantic steamship St. Louis, to be of the same size, as the original and elegantly fitted out. The interior of the ship will be used as a restaurant and the vessel will be reached from the shore by gangways. This Is a duplicate of an exhibition now being given at the

Antwerp Exposition. Henry G. Kit* tredge, the secretary of the Maasacbu * setts commission to the exposition, is In Atlanta conferring with the management in reference to the Massachusetts display. While there he will select the site for the Massachusetts building.— St Louis Globe-Democrat

A GREAT YACHTSWOMAN.

The Beautiful American Who Helped to Bntld the Defender. The most enthusiastic yachtswoman in the United States or for that matter in the world is Mrs. C. Oliver Iselin, who lives aboard the Defender, which she helped to design. Without her suggestions the Defender would haye lacked many an important detail. From

MRS. C. OLIVER ISELIN.

the time the first pencil sketch was drawn until Mrs. Iselin cracked the bottle of champagne upon her deck, crying. “I name thee Defender!” she worked as tirelessly as Herreshoff himself, giving her entire attention to every step in the work. Mrs. Iselin will accompany her husband abroad and will do a litle racing with the Britannia, owned by the Prince of Wales. She is a great favorite with the Prince and Princess of Wales and with the Czar of Russia, and is one of the most beautifuftuf American women.

Glad to See Him.

An American politician, commenting ou the fact that in America we always expect a man to get up and say something on a public occasion, adds, “But the silent meu win.” That is not always tlie ease, but it is a fact that many a man of worth and mettle hates to be “evermore talking.” It is said that Von Moltke was “silent in seven languages.” Before the opening of a striking campaign he wa walking the streets with head depress ed when some busybody approached him, determined to extort from him a word in regard to current events. “How are matters coming on, general?” he asked. “Well,” said the general, “my cabbages are coming on very well, but my potatoes want rain!” It is a popular mistake that famous men like no topic of conversation sc well as that of their own renown. Nol long ago a celebrated novelist was the guest of honor at a brilliant reception. He had heard the praises of his own work until any one but a conceited man would have been faint and weary, bul he had borne up bravely through it all, Finally a timid man was presented to him, who said, with an apologetic air: “Pm ashamed to confess it, but I, haven’t read one of your books.” The novelist bent forward, a look of relief and Joy irradiating his face. He placed both hands on the newcomer’s shqulders. “My dear fellow,” he said, with a warmth lie had not shown before, eveD to those of high degree, “I’m glad to see you!”

A Pretty Tough State.

From the Industrial American oi Lexington, Ivy., we take the following gloomy account of the moral conditions existing In that State. But il should be remembered that Kentucky is not the only State of which practically the same may be said. The Judges, juries and lawyers are wholly responsible for the conditions thus sel forth by the American: “Take the State at large, and thworld stands amazed at the way ir which the laws are administered. Human life is not held of any value, 13 the statement made to the world by the ac tion of Kentucky juries. “The time has come to call a halt The gallows must be used and murdei suppressed, or capital and homeseekerf will continue to shun Kentucky as they would a city with an epidemic of cholera or yellow fever.”

Hard to Convince.

It took six visits to a presentation of the danse du ventre by Turkish girls a) Atlantic City, N. J., to convince the councllmen of that town that the dance was improper. Several residents ol the town protested to the council thal the ’ exhibition was immoral, and the Mayor and Council promptly went in a body to see it themselves. Half the city fathers were unable to decide on the first visit and they went to see il again on four succeeding evenings, and even then one councilman remained unconvinced and could not decide thal the exhibition should be suppressed until he had seen it once more. The show was closed.

Men's Bights in Bengal.

Man asks for protection against mercenary woman in Bengal. Babu Rasik Lai Roy wants the government to help him to suppress the excessive expense of Hindu marriages, and especially the dowry of the brides, as “the temptation of selling the son to the highest bidder has become too great to be resisted.”

Torpedo Boats.

About 1871, the first torpedo boal was built by the Thorneycrofts, of London; it was fifty feet long and had a speed of sixteen and a auartei knots an hour. Mrs. Zabbs—l met with one of the strangest experiences of my life to-day. Mr. Zabbs—You did! What was itl Mrs. Zabbs—Just this: I wfta getting od an open ear and the man on the end seat moved in and let me have it.—Roxbury Gazette. f A “versatile genius” is really a Jack-of-all-trades, and master of none.

HUMOR OF THE WEEK

STORIES TOLD BY FUNNY MEN OF THE PRESS. Odd, Cnrioua and Laughable Phases of Homan Nature Graphically Portrayed by Eminent Word Art lata of Our Own Day—A Budget of Fan. Sprinkles of Spice. Beside the brook. With line and hook, My love and I did splash and dabble. I begged a kiss, She answered this: “You surely know how brooks wifi babble.” —Philadelphia Record. “Why don’t you marry that-girl? She is a real pearl.” “Ah, yes, but I don’t like the mother of pearl.”—Fliegende Blatter. “Help! help!” cried the man who was being robbed. “Calm yourself,” said the highwayman, “I don’t need any as sistance.”—Town Topics. He —I believe I will propose to her by telephone. Do you think she will accept me? She —She ought to If you ring her up properly.—Harper’s Bazar.

Customer—These trousers don’t sit right about the hips. Tailor —They’re all right—what you need is something more in the pockets.—Chicago Record. Lea—Caddington’g still suffering from that toothache, though I advised him to take a drop of carbolic acid and kill the nerve. Perrins—Didn’t he do it? Lea —No; he didn't have the nerve.— Judge. Cholly—Thought you were going to marry Miss Kostique? Gussie—Going to awsk her to-night My chawnces are about even. “How so, deah boy?” “She must say either ‘yes’ or ‘no.’ ’’—Philadelphia Record. Dozber—Do you think that constantly wearing a hat has a tendency to make a man bald? Jazlln—No; but when a man is bald I’ve noticed that it has a tendency to make him constantly wear a hat—Roxbury Gazette. “I don’t see any use in getting blue over it, old man. She isn’t the only girl in the world.” “That’s Just what I’m blue about Think of the chances 1 have of making the same kind of a fool of myself again.”—Brooklyn Life. Although she had a gift, as people said, A generous gift of song from Nature free, Her clear papa with rage fell nearly dead At finding each short lesson cost a V. —Pittsburg Dispatch. are charged,” said the rural Justice, “with stealing two gallons of whisky. Why did yon do it?” “Steal two gallons?” “Yes.” “Cos I couldn’t git away with a barrel, yer honor. I never wuz very strong!”—Atlanta Constitution. An exemplary patient—“ This morning the doctor ordered me to drink warm water an hour before every meal; and here I’ve been drinking for the last forty minutes, but I’ll be jiggered if I cap swallow another drop.” —Humorlstisclie Blaetter.

“So you took your family to the sea shore?” said the faceti-us man. “I did,” was the melancholy reply. “Where there Is such grandeur iu the breaking of the waves ” “Yes.” “And the breaking of the engagements ” “Yes, and of the S2O bills."—Washington Star. To folk in city and village and farm The time Is coming, and woe betide, When campaign speakers “view with alarm,” And then Incidentally “point with priae.” * —Chicago Record. The physician—Great Scott! young lady, you say yon had eleven dishes of ice cream, four soda •waters and a ham sandwich. Oan you wonder why you’re sick? The young lady (feebly)—lt must have been the ham sandwich, I suppose.—Louisville Post “Do you find this weather oppressive?” he asked. “Yes,” she replied; i“it’s very hot and tiresome.” “Would it make matters more endurable if I were to propose to you ?” “Oh, yes. Do propose ice cream, soda water and a .drive.”—Washington Star. Fuddy—What is the trouble with Caudle and his wife? Duddy—She has sued him for breach of promise. Fuddy —Breach of promise! How can that be, when they are married? Duddy— Why, she married him for his money, and he declines to give up the money.— Boston Ttanscript “How will you have your eggs cooked?” asked the waiter. “Make any difference in the cost of ’em?” inquired the cautious customer with the brimless hat and faded beard. “No.” “Then cook them on the top of a slice of ham,” said the customer, greatly relieved.— Spare Moments. Mr. Urban—Why is it that you country people charge so much more for board than we have to pay in the city ? Mrs. Ensilage—La me! What a question! In the city the boardin’ house keepers has plenty of markets, but here we has to raise everything.—New York Weekly. “We couldn’t help liking each other, you see, The yacht met with very rough weather; And while she was pitching and tossing, you know, We were constantly thrown together.” —Brooklyn Eagle. Doctor—l would advise you, dear madam, to take frequent baths, plenty of fresh air, and dress in eool gowns. Husband (an hour later)—What did the doctor say? Wife—He said I ought to go to a watering place, and afterwards to the mountains, and to get some new light gowns at once.—Fliegende Blaetter.

Horse on a Street Car Fender.

Detroit has a street car fender —one fender, not a style of fender—which beats that boasted of by Philadelphia, which the other day picked up a bicyclist and his machine and carried them uninjured for half a block. The Detroit car struck a horse on Warren avenue. The horse was scooped off Its feet and fell Into the fender and Was carried along in it for 260 or 300 feet until the car was stopped. Then the horse got up, stepped off and trotted away uninjured. A man isn’t always a fool because he oermlta himself to be deceived.

THE SENSIBLE SASH-BALANCE.

A Device that Does Away with that Noisy Nuisance. Who is not familiar with that annoying neighborhood sound of a squeaking pulley as a window sash Is thrown up? It seems to be a very simple matter to inject a few of oil upon the rusted bearings and thus do away with the trouble, but who ever takes the time to do it? Meanwhile the squeaking goes on all around us. Your window pulleys

NEEDS NO WEIGHTS.

squeak, those of your neighbor squeak, everybody’s squeak; and nobody applies the needed oil. And then those bothersome cords; they are always wearing out, or fraying, making it necessary to tear out the window frame to put in new ones. The weights, too, get jammed, and it generally takes half an hour or so to get them loose and in running order again. Now here is a means of getting rid of the whole nerve-rasping trouble. This aptly called “sensible” sash balance needs no weights, nor does its action depend upon pulleys. The sash is simply attached by a loop to a wound-up ribbon

RIBBON OF ALUMINUM.

of aluminum bronze, and a brake permits the balance to be adjusted to suit a sash of any weight. This balance works smoothly and noiselessly, and it is to be hoped that It. or some equally good deyice, may soon replace the cord-hung weights from which we have so long suffered. The accompanying Illustrations show both a front and a rear view of the balance.

FOR MINE SURVEYING.

An Ingenious Arrangement for Signaling Under the Ground. In mine surveying it is necessary to use some luminous object for signaling, as rods eannot be seen. The Colliery Engineer illustrates a contrivance that seems to answer the purpose admirably. It consists of a large brass bob, hollowed out to hold oil and fitted with a top to form a lamp. The bob Is pivoted to a ring, to which

TO SIGNAL UNDERGROUND.

are attacned the supporting chains. By this arrangement the point of the bob, the wick tube and the point of support are always in the same vertical line, even if one chain becomes longer than the other by wearing or by heating from the lamp wick. The sights are taken to the wick tube. In fiery coal mines the flame is protected by fine wire gauze to prevent it from igniting the gas.

Surprised the Waiter.

A Boston man traveling through the South was obliged to stop over in -* small town where there was but hotel, at which the accommodations were hardly to be called elaborate. When the colored waiter brought his dinner, Mr. C. found that he was to have roast beef, stewed tomatoes, corn, peas, potatoes and coffee, the vegetables served in the usual stone china canoes. Presently ha said to the waiter,“Dick, pass the spoons^’ The waiter rolled his eyes in genuine amazement. “Spoons, sail! What y*u want with the spoons? There’s y»’ spoon in yo’ corn.”

An Adventurous Fellow.

A young man named Bennett has put his bicycle to profitable use in the Australian gold fields by establishing with it a postal route between Ooolgardie, the center of the mining district, nnd Dundos, which is two hundred and eighty miles away. Strapped on the wheel is a small letter-box, in which he carries letters between the two towns for a shilling a piece and telegrams for five shillings, making one round trip a week. A revolver, a sharp knife, and a water bottle comprise the rest of the outfit The 18-months-old daughter of a New York man died from a mosquito bite. The hlte made the child restless, and it scratched , it continually, causing inflammation.,