Democratic Sentinel, Volume 18, Number 46, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 30 November 1894 — Page 6

Silence

By Miss Mulock

CHAPTEK VII. Roderick did not appear among his family until the next day. or rather the same day, for it was four in the morning bes re the last guest departed and he household sunk into quietness. Then, Bella Jardine knocking at his door, had teen greeted with a fraternal growl; and the trayful of lood which, according to the family faith that the way to the heart is through the stomach, she brought up to him, was left untasted on the door-mat. “Let me alone; I will see you all at breakfast ” were the only words that could be got out of him Angry, sorrowful, and utterly worn cut in body as well as mind, he threw him-elf on the bed in the cold tireless room — evidently he had not been expected so soon—rolled himse.f up in a bearskin rug. w.iich he had bought at Neuchatel, in planning that neier-to-be-for-gotten da; at Lausanne, and slept for many hours. Slept so heavily that when he awoke, long after miduay. he was surprised to find the fire lighted and a dainty little breakfast standing beside it, also his feet, stretching outside the rug. we e carefully wrapped up in one or his mother s shawls. She had been in his room, then mak,iim “comfortaule,” as was her habit to do, as much a- she could—perhaps giving him, unfelt, the kiss that he might not have cared for, the tear whicn would only have vexed him. Poor mother! And he was her own, her only si n. Roderick was to rched. When he came down stairs the .first thing he did was to look for her a l over the house, and when they met he kissed her affectionately. “Forgive my being so rude as to go to bed at once: but 1 was very tired. And you/ You have been up, spite of your fatigues, and looking alter me as usual/ I did so en ; oy my nice breakfast! Thank you, mother. ” tie kissed her again, and then sat down, not knowing what else to say. Would she speak nr. t. or must he, on the subject which never left his mind for a moment / “Yes, you were quite wearied out with your long w ourney, my dear boy," said Mrs. .lurdine. “ion must have traveled nignt and day, to have got back so soon.” “Could I do otherwise, thinking you were ill, mother'/ and naturally I was somewhat astonished—— “To find us in the middle of a ball?’’ broke in Bella, who sat surrounded by a heap of wedding finery. “It mu-’t have been a little per lexing. But we thought that frightening teiegram was the be it way to bring you home. ” Roderick drew back, Hushing angrily. “Hold your tongue, Bella,” said the mother. “But, my dear Rudy, I never said 1 was ill; I only said 1 war ‘not well.’ which was quite true. How could it be otherwise, after your letter/”

‘■■you did got my letter, then-my two letters?” “Yes, both.” And there ensued an awkward silence Thecriticil moment passed, seized, unhappily, by neither side, for Roderick, excessively irritated, waked instantly out of the room and out of the house. It is astonishing how long clever people—and she was a decidedly clever woman in her way, was Mrs. Jardine can shirk a difficulty, or avoid an unpleasant thing. ne hardly knew how it came about, but Roderick had actually been two whole days at home, taking his place at the foot of his mother's sumptuous table, and entertaining, with gentle courtesy and welldisguised weariness, her endless guests, falling back into old ways so completely that he sometimes asked himself if the last two months were not merely a morning dream; yet not a syllable had been breathed of his intended marriage or of Mile. Jardine. It was not till the third day after his return, which, being tne day before the wedding, was, of necessity kept free from visitors, that Roderick succeeded in finding his mother aione. Coming into her “boudoir,” as she called it, the little room oil the draw-ing-room, which she made her place of refuge when she was not in sufficiently grand toilet for visitors, he saw her sitting there, for “five cuiet minutes. ” ‘ Mother, you ought to rest; you will be ill if you don’t.eaid her son, going up to her with honest anxiety. “I’ll rest by and by,” she answered, “when to morrow is over. Oh, these weddings! It’s all very well for the young wlks; but—the patents! However, this is the last one. 1 have no more girls to marry.” “No, mother,” said Roderick, sitting down by her, both out of real tenderness and because he felt that now was the golden moment which must not be let pass by—for there was a kind look in her eye ■ and a tremor in her voice, such as had not greeted him ever since he came home; “no, mother, your daughters are all safely disposed of. And when your son marries he will faithfully promise that his wedding shall give you no trouble.” Mrs. Jardine drew back, then looked at the door, as if feeling herself caught in the.toils and anxious to esca; e; but Roderick held her hand fast; ay, he put his arm round her waist in & tender, filial way; he was determined to “have it o it,' as people say, with her; but he wished all io be done in the gentlest an i mo t kindly fashion. “Yes, mother, as I told you, there will. I trutt, be another marriage in the family, but " . “Bu, not yet. Not for a very long time. I couldn’t stand it—indeed I could not. Don't let us talk about that. I am very busy, you see.” “Nay. mother, we must talk about it. I have been waiting to speak to you ever since I came home. You are the first and only per.-on I can speak to on this sub ect. You feel that. ” “Feel what? Speak about what? Let me go. I declare I don’t know what you are driving at. and I can’t put up with any nonsense—n jt just now." Roderick turned pale with anger, but he controlled himself. “It is not nonsense; i explained all in my letter—in my two letters—which you say you received.” “What, all about the little Swiss girl who you fancy is your cousin?” “She is my cousin, there is no doubt of that; at least, remotely so: not near enough to warrant the slightest ob ectton, which I know' you have te ccus‘Marrylngl tut, tut laddie, who

spoke of marrying? Put such felly out ,of your head at once. .Never let me J hear of it again, or of her!” ! “Never hear of her again ” said Roderick, slowly, tho gh h s heart was burning with indignation, and the nervous trembling which he always felt in moments of excitement seemed to run through his whole frame. “Mother, you misunderstand the matter. ou must hear of her. She is the lady whom I have cho en for my wife—if I can get her.—my wife ana your daughter-in law.” “Never!” cried Mrs. Jardine. “Y’ou had better give the thing up, Rode - iek, fur I wil havo nothing whatever to do with it. or with her. ’’ “Very well,” answered Roderick, and his voice was a deadly quietness. “Now we know exactly where we stand. Mother, you are' busy, you ray, and I have also an engagement. Good morning” “But you will be back to dinner?” He pau ed a moment and then answered, “Certainly.” “And you are not forgetting that tomorrow is the wedding-day.-” “I trust I am not in the tabit of forgetting any of my duties.” She looked after him a< he quitted the room, passing Bella, who just then entered, without a word or 100k —indeed, he seemed to -walk blindly, like a person half stunned, and her mind misgave her a little. * * * * * The wedding-day 'came and passed. It was net a day of seutirnental emotion; the principal consciousness which it brought to Roderick was that there were certain inevitable things to do and say. which he did and said to the b st oi his ability; thinking the while that his wedding day, did it ever come, should be as unlike this day as possible. So Bella Jardine and her new “gudeman,” if such a vulgar word could be med for Mr. Alexander Thomson withou. scandalizing himself and hi< family, which floated away into felicity, wh le the hundred or more particular friends who had been , invited to see them "turned off,” as the young lady with whom Roderick had t > open the ball expressed it, danced till far into tho “sma’ hours” with spirit and en-thusia-m. In fact, no marriage could have gone off with greater “aclaw, ” as Mrs. ,jard.no declare.!, and she was right; her own indomitable energy, good temper, and good spirits contributing in no small degree to that desirable result But with all these excellent qualities, one Hags sometimes at nearly sixty; and during the folowing day, anxiously as Rouerick sought a chance of speaking to his mother, she was, either intentionally or unintentionally, wholly invisible. Not till afte dinner —nay, nearly bod-time, aid the m Aber and son come really face to face, sitting alone togetho" in the large, si’ent drawing-room, which 100 ed especially drea y. so much so that Mrs. Jardine, saving som thing about “going to bed early,” rang or the servants, and conducted, it seemed with more lengthiness than usual, the never omitted family prayers. These ever, mother and son were again alone. “Well, my dear,” said Mrs. Jardine, with a rather impressive yawn, “1 suppose we had better go to bed.” “Not just this minu ! e, mother,” entreated Roderick. “Let me have half a dozen words with you, if you are not too tired. Remember, I start to-mor-row for Neuchatel. ” “Neuchatel —t .-morrow! What in the world do you mean?’ “I tol l you‘that immediately after the wedding I meant to go back to Switzerland.” “Why? What for?” Roderick pau ed a moment “To see Mademoiselle Jardine, and ask her to become my wife. She is alone and unprotected, and if she does me the honor to accept me, I think it will be best to arrange our marriage with as little delay as possible.” He said this in as quiet and matter-of-fact way as he could; perhaps this very quietness only excited his mother the more. “What! would ycu forsake me enti ely/ I couldn’t have believed it of you! Oh, Body, my boy, my only son.” She may have been exaggerating her feelings a little, in or de upon his; still the e wa- a ringWf natu al pathos in her voice which took the peer fellow by storm. “Mother, dearest.” he tat down by her and affectionately clasped her hand, “who talks of forsaking/ Not I, certainly, You are not going to lose your son, but only to gain another daughter—and such a daughter. If you only saw her. Will you see her? Will you come ba.-k with mej to Switzerland and let us fetch her home together. ” He was not wise, not tactful, cerlainly. this poor Roderick. Alas! a large nature, judging a smaller one, often makes egregrious mistakes. Mrs. Jardine drew herself up with indignant ] ride and outraged decorum. “tv ell, I do think that is the coolest and most impudent proposal -—” “Impudent.” (She had pronounced It “impident,” noor woman! which made it a still more obnoxious word.) Roderick looked at his mother full in the face. Though she was his mother, he was a Jardine and she was not, wrath set better on him than on her; because if hereditary blood teaches nothing more, it usually teaches that i elf-restraint which we are accustomed to call good breeding. “Impudence, I think, has never been a vice of our family: and the lady I have chosen being of that family, deserves entire respect—which Ishallexact for her trom everybody, in.hiding my own mother. Also, excue me, I sffall resent any insult offered t> her, even if offered by my own re ations, exactly as if it had been an insult to myself.” He spoke so quietly and with such stately courtesy, the steel armor of per ect politeness, that Mrs. Jardine was frightened. Tne boy was his father’s own son. only with stronger health, a fii mer will, a spirit unbroken, and, above all, tre talisman o. hope in his besom—hope and love. As he stood there he looked so handsome in his fearless youth—fearless, yet offering no obnoxious front to any one—gifted with that be-A of courage, the power of self-control —that his mother% heart misgave hera litt.e. “Wait till next day; we will talk it all over to-morrow. I am so tired tonight” And she nervously took up her bedroom candle, which was waiting beside her. Roderick lighted it for her, and then kissed the hand into which he gave it. “Lear mothe •, I am grieved to vex you, believe tnut: and 1 will wait a day —two or three days—rather than go against your will. Think better of what you have said: think better of me Dp you not believp I love you ” “It doesn't look like it,” said she, sharply. To nata'es like hers, gentleness sometimes sceins like a confession of weakness, and only rouses them to greater tyranny. “Howeve ,du as you say; wait a few days, and I’ll think over it. " After his m ther quitted him Roderick pondered uidly over himsalf -and

his fortunes for a long time. Passionate V in lo e as he was, he wis selfluhly in love. He could not thro< himself out of him elf so as to see a litA tie on the other s de. It was hs d fori h:s m ther who lo ed autho - ty and was ealouso affect on. t < be dethroned in this way. '/ nd ne wi hed- was i| disloyalty to his be oved —that things had hap; ened differently —that she haq been some ne w.< m his mother knew and .ised, rather than a complete stranger. But all that was past now. Hia choice was made —this r n ne; for* with the impulsive convic ion of youth; he was quite cer ain ihat if he did nofi marry Silen e a:dine he would never ma ry anybody. Hi mother must make up her mind to accept the inevitable. Sti 1 he would wait: a few days didj not matter so very much, with a whole life time of happiness before him. Surely, suiely it was before him, and not a mere phantom of his own brain? Surel. she, so deeply beloved, must have felt tha i was so. Her sweet, firm, yet trem ilous “yes” must ha e implied her relief in him, which a little delay would never shake, but only confirm. Then whh an easier mind, and a heart almost happy—so strong is hope at his age—he walked back a street’s length in the pelting rain, humming to himself his favorite ditty Whenever she comes, she shall find me ready To do her homage—my queen, my queen. |IO BE CONTINUED. I

GETTING NERVE.

A View of the Bridal Chamber to Give Him Courage. “Got any bridal chambers here?” asked a tall, awkward you g man with an ancient carpetsack in one hand, a frightened look on his face, a black slouch hat on his head, and wear ng a hand-me-down suit of faded brown. He was from some interior town of Missouri. “Yes, sir; we have some very fine bridal chambers here,” replied Cnief Clerk Cunningham. “Waal, 1 want ter look at ’em, fer I’ve got to engage one of 'em,” said the stranger. “All jight, just step this way, please,” said Mr. Cun lingham, who cal ed an assistant and gave the order: “Show this gentleman the bridal chambers. ” Tne stranger investigated the bridal chambers for half an hour and then returned to the coun'.er downstairs and said to Mr. Cunnii gham: “Golly! these rooms air ez lovMy ez a pastur’ lot in par di e Now they air the finest you have, air they?” “Y'es, sir, they are the finest in the city, and are good enough for a millionaire an:l his bride.” “Waal, 1 m much obliged fer a l the trouble you ve gone to. I’ll be in next week, I s’pose, an’ take one uv ’em,” the str mger said, moving off. “Oh, you did not wis i to engage a bridal chamber to day,” said Mr. Cunningham in su prise. The young st anger almost jumped out of his brogans, s,a s tho St. Louis Republic. “Gob amighty, mister!” he exclaimed.. “1 hain t ast the gal yit 1 m jist a-doin" this to get my i.erve up so's I.can go back home an’ pop th’ question to ’er.”

The Emperors of Morocco.

The Emperors of Morocco do not succeed to the crown by right of inheritance. Theoreti. ally they are chosen by the people from among tho descendants of the Mohamm dan Prophet pi actically they are placed upon the throne by some palace intrigue, or by the influence of some man or body of men powerful and energetic enough on the death of a Sultan to seize the reins of power, to bribe the soldiery in the vicinity of the palace, to destroy, banish, or outwit the other claimants to 1 ower, and to effect the proclamation in due form of the Sultan of his or their choice. The late Emperor became sovereign in no different manner i rom that oi his predecessors. It ne d hai dly be said that the man who interferes in the election of the monarch of Morocco risks all upon the cast of the die. If he fails and the rival claimant be successful, the would-be kino-maker, and all of his kith and kin mav consider themselves fortunate if, by apieeipitate Hight, leaving all their worldly goods I ehind them, they are able to escape from death and possibly from torture. The man, therefore, who succeeds in placing a sovereign on the throne of Moracco has the strongest possible claim on the gratitude of the autocrat whom he has successfully installed in power. How did the late Sultan reward the subject who risked for him his life and possessions'? Some time after his accession, when ho began to feel himself secure upon his throne, and without even the pretense of a uarrel or of an accusation, the late Emperor cast this man into one of his dungeons, and there he remained until a few months ago, whoa he was at length released after an imprisonment of f urteen years. The motive for this crime was probably f ar lest the chief who had been powerful enough to raise him to the throne might some day use his influence in favor of another.—Earl of Meath, in the Nineteenth Century. A Miner's Experience with a Mule. Patrick Murray, of Perth Amboy, N. J., had an exciting experience a few days ago with a mine mule at Summit Hill, la., which he says he will never forget. When he reached the bottom of the slo e and proceeded to explore the gangway, he attracted the attention of one of the mules. He is at a loss to know what angered the animal, but the beast came for him at full speed, and Murray started for a “heading” with nothing but a miner s lamp to guide him It was a race for life. The mule was rapidly closing the gap, when the Jer.-eyman 'reached two minacars. He plunged between them. The mule countermarched, and began using bis hind feat with terrib o effect. He kicked the stout oak planks of the car into kindling wood, and while he was occupied in this manner Murray made his escape, and returned to the surface. Kil’cd the Father of Rattlers. The largest rattlesnake ever killed po sibly in the entire ntate of Georgia was kii>ed Saturday afternoon in the EastjMacon distiict. It had twentytwo rattles and a button, making it 23 years old. It measured a fraction over five feet in length. Nobody can be found to have-heard of a rattier 23 years old. A sna e that carries fourteen or ixteen rattles and a button is considered a monster in those parts, and ip 1 oked upon with most respectful bearing. Th; men h cl i.uite an exciting time ki ling the snake. None of the n dared go within several lengths of hitn, and wh n he shook his mighty bun h of rattles the noise was awful, and struck (error to the hearts of the negroe-, causing them each time to retreat farther. They fihaby dis atched him with along pile.—St. Louis Globe KING Humbert went out from his hunting lodge at Valle del Oreo one day recently and killed eighteen wild goats and thirty-two chamois. When the “bag” was examined it was found that every one of the victims of the rojral rifle had been shot ip the head.

SUPREME COURT OF THE UNITED STATES.

1-Justice Geryge Shiras. 2— Justice David J. Brewer. 3-Justice Henry B. Brown. <—Justice John M. Harlan s—Justice Edward White. C-Justice Howell E. Jackson. 7—Chief Justice Fuller, b—Justice Horace Gray, ft—Justice Stephen J. Field.

The most dignified of all our Government institutions Is the Supreme Court, which holds Its sessions in Washington. It is composed of elderly men who are very solemn and never in a hurry., and who are as slow in their various proceedings as they can very well be. The court’s business, indeed, is several years behind, and there seems no likelihood that it will ever manage to catch up to the present. Each justice receives a salary of SIO,OOO a year, but still their job can’t be exactly called an easy one. They are in court six days in the week for four hours, and the outside preparation of their opinions requires an immense expenditure of time. Thecourt assembles each day at noon, and after putting on its black silk robes marches in procession into the court “oom. There is a theatrical touch to the entrance. The black-robed figures glide mysteriously behind the pillars, and then, as though at a prompter's signal, appear at the spaces between the pillars and nlove to their places. These places are fixed, and if you know the order which is invariably followed in assigning them you can answer without hesitation any question as to the chronological order of the associate justices. The chief justice, of course, sits In the middle. When the justices enter the court crier raps three times and says in a sing-song tone: “Oyer, oyez, oyez! All persons having business before the

LIVE LIKE BEASTS.

FRIGHTFUL STATE OF AFFAIRS IN PENNSYLVANIA. European Brigands and Cut-throats Filthier than the Digger Indians and More Murderous than tho Awful Mollie Maguires—Two Murders Every Week. Barbarians in America. The people of the anthracite coal count.es of Pennsylvania—Luzerne, Carb .n, Lackawanna and Schuylkill—make up such an ethnological crazy quilt as hardly can be matched in any district of corresponding size in the world, says a Wilkesbarre correspondent. Arabs, Turks, Gieeks, biavs, Boies, Italians, negroes, Germans, French, English, Irish, Scotch, Yankees a bewildering composite of race, color and creed tre ail crowded together in a little territory as small as many of the continental principalities. The confusion of t.agues heard on a Saturday ni ht on the streets of any mining town of the counties mentioned is ike what a con.ersa tone might have been at the base of the Tower of Babel. in the actual work of mining the Slavs, Boles and Ita ians are principa ly engaged. With the downfall of that organization of murderous scoundrels, known as the Mollie Maguires, cam: a series of changes which eventually resulted in the supplanting of Iri.-h, Welsh find Scotch labor in the mines. Natnf ally it was from tho very lowest strata of si c ety in these European c untries that tho ranks of the new stock of miners were lecruited. When a wretch had committed such deeds of villainy that even the recesses of the Sicilian and Calabrian mountains ceased to i e a refuge for him, he male his way o. e the seas and found a safe haven in the anthracite region of Pennsylvania, screened and guarded by his fellow-c untrymen. It was not all done in a day, but the era of cutthroat terrorism and high wages opened by men of English-speaking races has at la t absolutely given wav to an era which might almost be called one of human vbrmin and low w-ages. ■Livi- o i i'i th Vermin. Human vermin hardly seems too strong a term to one who'takes even a cursory view of the manner in which they exist. An Italian b arding shanty along the lines of railroads or that of ihe Croton viaduct in New York while it was in course of construction was bad enoi gh: but an Italian boardinghouse of that variety is luxurious compared with one in the mountains, here, such as the miners live in. The stories told of the filth, the vice, the bruta ity in the e stews by those who have been familiar with them for years are ai-

SLAVS AT A MEAL IN THE PENNSYLVANIA MINING DISTRICT.

most beyond belief. Ad" zen men and women are packed promiscuously into one room barely large enuugh for two to live in with decency. The meals are served in an ordinary washb wl or dish pan, into whic .i the boarders plunge their hands or their spoons, conveying their food to their- m uths without the intervention of plates or knives and forks. Babies and dishes are all washed in the same water. When sickness Jails on ono of the poor wretches and he seem, likely to die he is ilted from his bed and carried out of doors to breathe his last, in order that the living may not havle the bother of a dead man around, or incur the expense i f a funeral. It is but fi£r to sav ihat in this respect of treatment of the dead and dving there is a di tinct difference between the, Italians and the Slavs, gre.it v to the advantage of the former. The 11 alians will spend the last cent to pay for a doctor s attendance on a sick relative'or to ecure a dead friend a Accent burial. The Slavs will re-

honorable the Supreme Court of the United States are admonished to draw near and give attention, as the court is about to asemble. God bless the United States and this honorable court!” When the gavel first falls all those within the bar of justice rise and remain standing until the justices, at a signal from the chief justice, take their seats. As they sit down they bow to the attorney general and the members of the bar. The black robes which it has become the custom for the judges to wear—though why no one knows, for there is no law on the subject—have been made by one woman for the last fifty years. They cost the enormous price of .SIOO. The justice wears his robe only when the Supreme Court, as a body, is participating in some official ceremony. He may go gowned to a funeral, if it is an official funeral. He wears it at the inauguration of a President; but ordinarily he puts it on in the robing-room in the morning and takes it off in the robing-room at dusk. He doe's not wear it even in the consulting room; so there is very little wear and tear on it, and one robe will outwear several suits of clothing. Serving in the Supreme Court seems conducive to longevity. Several justices have had terms of over thirty years. The oldest now on the bench is Mr. Field, who has already served 31 years, and hopes to make it 34, which will equal Chief Justice Marshall’s term, the longest on record.

sort to any device to get a dead or dying man off their hands without expense. But it is not so much their aboriginal ideas touching the decencies of life, their filth and their bestial habits which have made these wretched people more and more abominable in the eyes of communities on which they hare been implanted like social ulcers. In respects, it is true, the Digger Indians would figure to advantage by comparison. But it is their criminal pro; ensities, their murderous savagery, which have been steadily growing, until they have seriously

GETTING RID OF A RICK BROTHER.

raised a question as to the possibility of forever enduring their presence in the region. Two Murders Ev*»rv Week. During the past eighteen months there has been an average of a murder a week, while of murderous assau.ts with deadly weapons, many of which terminated fatally, the average has been two er three a week. And yet, during all that time, there have been only two convictions of murder in the first degree, and neither of these was a Pole, a Slav or an Italian. Tnere is no longer any hope in police protection. The officers of the law, in fact, have been literally paralyzed by the rising tide of murder which has swept over the region. Tens of thousands of dollars and weeks and months of time have been spent in elfo ts to bring just a very few of these red-handed butchers to justice, and yet not in two years has one of them been hanged. It is true that a few have been lodged in the penitentiary, the notorious Mutz gang of Italian assassins being a conspicuous instance of last year's work. But where ten are caught and punished, ninet r are never even apprehended. While probably there is no re > mar organization of murderers, like the MoTie Maguires, the Mollies themselves never worked more zea - ously or more cunningly to conceal their murderers and suppress all evi> dences of their crimes.

“Tote” Not a Negro Word.

In nothing is the student of American folk-speech so liable to error as in assigning geographical limits to a word or phrase. The English local dialects were pretty thoroughly mixed. One gained a little more dominance in one place, anoiher in another, but a stray provincial term is prone to turn up in places the most unexpected. “Tote” has long been regarded as a word of African origin, confined to certain regions where negroes abound. A few years ago Mr. G. A. Stephens, in a story, mentioned an “old tote road” in Maine. I wrote to inquire, and he told me that certain old portage roads, now abandoned, bore that name. I find the word used in a “Remonstrance” from the people of Gloucester County, Va. ; preserved in the Public Record Office in London. This paper bears date 1677, when there were four times as many white bond servants as negroes in Virginia. “Tote” appears to have been a well-under-stood English word in the seventeenth century. It meant then, as now, to bear. Burlesque writers who represent a negro as “toting a horse to water” betray their ignorance. In Virginia English the negro “carries” the ho/se to water by making the horse “tote” him I .—The Century.

Single Eyeglasses Prohibited.'

Single eyeglasses are prohibited in the German army. Even if a soldier has one good eye, yet needs glasses, he must perforce cover both eyes with them.

HUMOR OF THE WEEK

STORIES TOLD BY FUNNY MEN OF THE PRESS. Many Odd, Curious, and Laughable Phase* of Human Nature Graphically Portrayed by Eminent Word Artists of Our Own Day —A Budget of Fun. Sprinkle* of Spice. —Much charity that begins at home is too feeble to get out of doors.— Texas Siftings. —lt is not the woman who fires up the quickest that makes the best match. —Richmond Dispatch. —“Do poets wear long hair?” “Notall of them. Some of them are married.” —Atlanta Constitution. —A woman finds fault with everybody who finds fault with her husband except herself.—Philadelphia Press. He "T feel completely prostrated. I wish I were dead.” She—“ Well, why don’t you let me send for a doctor?”— Thomas Cat A row between the champion players, Lasker and Steinitz, is becoming something of a chess nut—Philadelphia Ledger. —iJack—“I wonder why Pillsbury committed suicide?” Meg—“Oh, it is so much cheaper than divorce, you know.”—Life. Times are so hard that many men are cutting their mustaches off so that they can smoke their cigars shorter.— Atchison Globe. —Smiley—“Now remember, I don’t want a very large picture.” Photographer—“ All right, sir. Please close your mouth!”—Tit-Bits. * —Lawyer (joyfully)—“Your divorce Is granted, madam.” Fair litigant (agitatedly—“ This completely unmans me.”—Detroit Tribune. —He—“You saw some old ruins while in England, I presume?” She—“ Yes, indeed! And one of them wanted to marry me!”—Brooklyn Life. —lnchley—“l came within an ace of making a fortune once.” Miss Foot—- “ How was that?” Inchley—“The other man had the ace." —Free Lance. —Maud—“I’m going to keep count of how many times Jack kisses me.” Susan—“ There’ll be a great flurry in the blankbook market.”—Town Topics. —Dick—“Been to the races?” Tom—- “ Yes, and had great luck.” Dick—- “ What on?” Tom—“On the way home. I didn’t have to walk.”—Detroit Free Press. —Teacher—“What is one of the greatest sources of discontent in the world?” Pupil—(whose parents live at a boarding house)—“Prune sauce.”—Boston Transcript. —Sobbing wife —“Three years ago you swore eternal love ” The brute—“ How long do you expect eternal love to last, anyway?”—New York Ledger. —The gesture and speeching efforts of a young lawyer in court may be tike the hands of a watch. They have nothing to do with the case.—New Orleans Picayune. —The ancient knight leaned lightly upon his lance. “Marry ” The modern maid was on his neck in an instant. ‘Oh, Roderick,” she cried, “this is so sudden!”—Pick-Me-Up. | —Little girl—“Oh, mamma! Come quick!” Mamma—“Mercy, what’s the matter?” Little girl—“ There’s a mouse in the kitchen and the poor cat is there all alone.”—Good News.

—“Was your father uukind when you told him you wanted to marry me, his coachman?” “No. He said at once that he would retain you and he offered me the maid’s place.”—Life. —“Has old Tough quit smoking?” inquired one man of another. “I don’t know’ whether he has or not, but he died the other day,” was the evasive reply.—Philadelphia Record. —“You are not looking very W’ell this morning.” “For good reason, too. My wife insisted on having a pink tea, and I had to take a little red rye to play even.”—lndianapolis Journal. • —A sympathetic air is as much a part of a doctor’s stock in trade as his learning. This sympathetic air is not itemized in the bill, but it appears there all right—Atchison Globe. —McSwatters—“ls Clanghorn a finished author?” McS witters—“Yes. You see, he called on Woolly, of the Howler, and called him a liar, and—well, you know Woolly.”—Syracuse Post. —Customer—“l wish you wouldn’t alw’ays tell such frightful stories. It makes one’s hair stand on end.” Barber—“ Exactly. That’s the idea, for then I can cut your hair better.”— Fliegende Blaetter. —Friend—“Why do you send your husband's clothes to a tailor, w’hen all they need is a button?” Mrs. Maniofeifi—“Well, the fact is my husband married so young that he never learned how to sew on a button.”—New York Weekly. —“The editor of the Moon is the meanest man this side of hades.” “What makes you think that?” “Think? I know he is. Didn’t he deduct 30 cents from the last poem I sold him because the fourteenth line was two feet short in the meter?”—Truth. —“I used to feel a little mean at robbin’ the bee hives,” said the tenderhearted farmer, but. since I got to thinkin’ it over I see that I am doing ’em good. Es it wa’n’t fer me takin’ the honey all them bees would be out of work all next summer.”—lndianapolis Journal. —Jaggs—“How did you ever dare to embrace Miss Boston?” Nagg—“She was speaking of banditti that night as we drove through the the strip of woods by the river, and remarked, ‘What a romantic place to be held up!’ ” Jaggs—“Yes.” Naggs—“Well, I held her up.”—Life.

How He Felt.

W. S. Gilbert was lunching, not long ago, at a country hotel, when he found himself iu company with three cycling clergymen, by whom he was drawn into conversation. When they discovered who he was, one of the party asked Mr. Giloert “how he felt in such a grave and reverend company.” “I feel.” said Mr. Gilbert, “like a lion in a den of Daniels *

Bunsen’s Carbons.

Burisen’s carbons were first put into practical use iu 1R42.

SLAVERY STILL LIVES.

Horrible Traffic In Human Live* Carried On in Epypt. Slave trading is still being carried on in Egypt despite the endeavors of the British authorities to suppress the

COL. SCHAEFER.

that the evidence against him was overwhelmingly strong, he confessed. It may well be asked, if those in response ble positions engage in slave who can be depended on to suppress or endeavor to suppress the horrid traffic in human lives? The man who ran Cherif’s villainy to earth is CoL Schaefer, director general of the Slave Trade Bureau. Since 1882 he has been at the head of this department and maintains a force of! 400 mounted men, whose object is to Intercept slave caravans coming from

the interior of the coast During his office he has liberated 15,000 staves from harams beside large numbers who were in the hands of dealers awaiting a ready market All through the interior and toward the Red

Sea the Slave Trade Bureau has patrols, but watchful as are the mounted men the wily Arab slave dealers often; elude them and land thousands of captives yearly to be disposed of in the l markets.

Difficulties of Cooking.

In African encampments the question of food is a burning one. How to obtain provisions, how to cook them when procured—these are problems of absorbing interest in a pioneer camp. The author of “Adventures in Mashonaland” says that it is curious and interesting to watch the process of victualling a new country. The trader throws the most eccentric provisiohs on tha market. At one time, the author says, nothing but tinned lobster could be purchased at their settlement; and at another time the whole of Maniea. breakfasted, dined and supped on folegras. V Our cooking utensils consisted of a three-legged pot and a frying pan.. How were we to create a dinner? We boiled the ox-flesh in the three-legged pot, whence it issued in the condition of shoe-leather. Mixing the meal with water, we made the most horrible halfcooked flat-cakes by heating the dough on hot stones. There was neither baking powder nor yeast in the country. One day we received a present of venison, shot by a Mr. Teal. Now I had from time to time saved up a small quantity of sardine oil, believing myself to be a famous housekeeper. In a moment of vain self-confidence I undertook the dinner that night, and we invited Mr. Campion to come and eat venison steaks. I fried those steaks in my sardine oil, and served them proudly. They positively looked like real steaks, such as people would eat at home. But, alas! scarcely had two mouthfuls been eaten when every one fled from the table, and my wonderful dinner was abandoned to the little native who wa'ited on us. He certainly enjoyed it immensely, so that even that ill wind blew somebody good; but it was unanimously decided that henceforth I was never to be trusted with the prepara tion of meals.

The Market Price of Wives.

In the earliest times of purchase, a woman was bartered for useful goods, or for services rendered to her father. In this latter way Jacob purchased Rachel and her sister Leah. The price of a bride in British Columbia and Vancouver Island varies from twenty to fifty pounds’ worth of articles. In Oregon, an Indian gives for her, horses, or buffalo robes; in California, shellmoney or horses; in Africa, cattle. A poor Damara will sell a daughter for a cow; a richer Kaffir expects from three to thirty. With the Banyai, if nothing be given, her family claim her children. In Uganda, where no marriage recently existed, she may be obtained for half a dozen needles, or a coat, or a pair of shoes. An ordinary price is a box of percussion caps. In. other parts, a goat or a couple of buckskins will buy a girl. Passing to Asia, we find her price is sometimes five to fifteen roubles, or at others a carload of wood or bay. A princess may be purchased for three thousand roubles. In Tartary, a woman can be purchased for a few pounds of butter, or where a rich man gives twenty small oxen, a poor man, may succeed with a pig. In Fiji her equivalent is a whale’s tooth or a musket. These, and similar prices elsewhere, are eloquent testimony to the little value a savage sets on his wife. Her charms vanish with her girlhood. She is usually married while a child, and through her cruel slavery and bitter life; she often becomes old and repulsive at twenty-five.

Old Soldiers in California.

California is becoming a favorite abiding place for many whose names areicoupled with the war history of the country; that Is, those who were once on the active list of the army. San Diego has a military colony, and the family of the late General Grant have recently purchased houses there. Among the residents are General Eli 11. Murr.iy, ex-Governor of Utah; General Ducat, who chief of staff to General Rosecrans.Tnd Major Mcylan, a retired officer of the Seventh Cavalry. Among other retired officers living there are Colonel Horton, Captains Henry Sweeney and W. R- Maine. Among the active oft]; cers who have family homes there are Lieutenant Colonels E. R. Kel iogg and J. WJ Barlow, Captain W. T. Duggan and Lieutenants Shallenberger, Gaillard and Settle. Redlands, at the foothills Of r the San Bernardino Mountains, is becoming ano'ther favorite locality for army officers. The world’s h roes aife sometimes very humble husbands.

horrible traffic. A case has just been tried in Cairo which reveals a melancholy state of affairs. The president of the Egyp--11 a n Legislative 'Council, Ali PashaJ Cherif, was accused of purchasing slaves, and, seeing

ALI PASHA CHERIF.