Democratic Sentinel, Volume 18, Number 44, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 16 November 1894 — Page 5

CLAY THEIR DIET.

THESE ARE NOT INDIANS NOR NEGROES, BUT WHITES. The Clay is Without Smell or Taste, and While Possessing Some Oily Properties it is Poisonous and Induces Premature Decay. Ever since my childhood I have heard about the clay-eaters of the Southern States, but until a few weeks ago I regarded them as a my h. In the interest of an immigration company I was making an examination of the valleys of the Eastern Blue Ridge, extending from the headwaters of the JJanawlia, in West Virginia, to the headwaters of the Chattahooche, in Gfeorgia. While in the foothills, about thirty miles south of Mount Airy, accompanied by a guide, my attention was attracted to two men, whose strange appearance indicated some unusual disease. Like all the mountaineers, these men were lean and lank; but their forms were stooped, their limbs attenuated and their eyes as dull as those of a dead fish—and these are certainly not the characteristics of the men of the Blue Ridge. The color of these men was a sickly ashy gray, the beard was thin and straggling, and the hair suggested wigs of faded Spanish moss. Dilapidated straw hats, cotton shirts and butternut trousers constituted their whole attire.

TYPICAL CLAY-EATERS.

At the first appearance of these men my guide whispered: “Them’s clay-eaters,’’ but still I was slow to believe that I was in the presence of the people of whom I had heard so much. The tender of cigars, which to these men, were great curiosities as well as luxuries, broke the ice, and I succeeded in entering into conversation with the elder. I say “elder,” but there was really nothing in the appearance of either man to indicate his age. They might have been brothers, or father and son, and if either could have told his age, which is doubtful, he might have passed for 20 or CO, for the faces looked like death-masks rather than those of living beings. “We-uns live up the crick,” said one of the men in reply to my question, and he indicated the direction by pointing his long arm, with its yellow, attenuated finger, in the direction of the mountain 'to the right. “Is it far from here ? ” I asked. After a painful pause, during which he sucked at his cigar and stroked his chin nervously, as if making a calculation, he dras.’pd out: “Waal, hit ain’t so far. Yar a stranger har, I reckon.” I confessed that I was, whereupon he continued, with the invariable introduction, “Waal, we-uns lives up nigh to the Harracan.” “Harrican” was «, new word to me, and I certainly would have been left in ignortance had not the guide come to the rescue by informing me that the “Harrican District” meant a place near the head of the valley, where, many years ago, hundreds of acres of forest had been leveled by a destructive hurricane. “What do you do at the Harrican?” I asked.

“Do!” repled the man, in the same dazed way, and with the same stroking of the chin, as if the question perplexed him. “Why, we-una lives thar. ” “What do you do for a living?” was my next question. “Oh, not much of nawthin,” he responded, and for the first time a ghastly smile flitted over the death mask, while his companion, who so far liifd remained reticent, and seeming indifferent as to what had been said, broke into a cackling laugh. Reasoning that these men were not sensitive, nor particularly dangerous if anything I might say offended them, I came directly to the point by asking: v “Are you clay eaters?” “Waal, yes,” drawled the man. “We-uns is bleeged to eat it when thar ain’t nawthin’ better.” I must confess that this information gave me a throb of delight. I was in the presence of people whom, all my life, I had regarded as myths. Against the wishes of my guide, who assured me that the country in the direction of the Harrican “was the most God-forsaken on the top of the green earth,” I determined to go there. About three miles from the point whore we met the two men we entered a labyrinth of fallen timber,which told me without question that this was the “Harrican.” The trail skirted the timber for about half a mile, and then it ended in a little valley like a cul de sac. Before reaching this place the fact that it vvas inhabited was indicated by a blue smoke column that rose straight in the clearest of amethystine skies. But this was not the only sign. A poor Southern white without a number of yellow curs would be an anomaly'. As we neared the cluster of little log cabins, these curs came into evidence. They were as lean and famished-look-ing as their masters, and appeared to have as much intelligence, and far more spirit. Standing in the door of the nearest cabin we saw a lank woman," covered with one ragged, dirty cotton garment, her ashy face and expressionless eyes showing unmistakably her relationship to the men. About her, in various stages of nudity, were a number of children, all lank of limb and wide of girth, ail having the same

deathly complexion, but with nothing suggestive of childhood about them excepting their size. The second man, who had up to this time been as mute as the proverbial clam, pointed his arm at the woman in the door and called out: “That's Sal. Sal. she’s my wife.” Regarding this as an introduction, I raised my hat and dismounted. At the expense of veracity I ventured to say: “You have a fine lot of children, madame.” Her thin lips parted, revealing two rows of long, yellow teeth, and she said, in the same cracked voice that distinguished the men: “Yes, thar’s a right smart lot of them, and thar’d be more if they wasn’t dead!” * Refusing the man’s offer to enter the hut, which we found to be devoid -of furniture, myself and the guide staked our horses in a patch of rich grass by the margin of the stream and then began an investigation. We found the little settlement to consist of fifteen huts, a few of which were abandoned, and that the population, all told, numbered thirtyseven. On the slope back of the huts patches of sickly corn were growing, but there was no domestic animal in sight except our horses. There were trout in the mountain streams and wild hogs in the woods, but these lank, lazy men did not seem to have energy enough to catch the one or hunt the other, and I subsequently found that even the corn would not have been planted had it not been for the women. The guide lit a fire to make some coffee, and while engaged in this operation a number of children, with a curiosity of which their seniors seemed devoid, gathered about us and watched the operation. But this curiosity was the only indication of childhood; there was no wondering comment passed between them; no burst of laughter came from their thin, ashy lips. They simply stood and stared at us, like so many potbellied manikins or naked and dissipated brownies. Suddenly I heard a cry in th e distance, and saw a lean girl of 12 or 13, with long, matted hair, rushing toward us, while she held extended in her right hand a bluish-gray substance. Without paying any heed to us, the girl passed from one to the other of the children, each of whom twisted off a piece of the clay she held in her hand. Each child rolled the morsel between dirty palms till it was as round as a marble and about the same size, and then it was clapped between the thin lips, and the chewing began in much the same way that I have seen children in the North chewing gum. This clay must have excited the salivary glands to excess, for soon the chins and lips of the children were covered with a bluish-frothy muck. I took a piece of the clay and found it without smell or taste, but evidently saturated with some natural oil. In response to my question as to where she got the clay, the girl pointed to a red scar, evidently a landslide at the head of the little valley, and said in the squeaky voice that characterized these people : “ You-uns’ll find right smart up thar.” After lunch' myself and the guide went to the place indicated, and under a thick layer of yellow clay we found a stratum about two inches thick of the bluish-gray substance which these peoDle used as food. There were signs all about indicating that the place had been worked for years, and my examination showed that the supply was practically inexhaustible.

THEIR MOUNTAIN CABIN.

In conversation with the people I was told that they preferred corn bread and meat to the clay, but as : the former required effort to produce I them, and the clay was hand to j hand, they regarded it ns the main i source of food. They begin eating it j before they can crawl, and they continue the practice through all the years of their lives. I was impressed with the fact that this clay was at once a food and a slow poison. Its toxic qualities were indicated in the shriveled limbs, distended stomachs and ghastly complexions of the people who use it, while the fact that for months at a time during the Winter season, it is the only food of which they partake, indicates that it contains some elements of nutrition. My subsequent investigation led me to believe that clay-eating is a habit as deadly and persistent as the alcoholism or morphine mania. In many cases wehre the clay-eaters hav,e been so placed that they could get an abundance of wholesome food they still craved and pined for this mineral substance. lam led to believe that it is more destructive of vital energy than opium, and that one of its most powerful manifestations is that of premature old age. After seeing the first clay-eaters I had no difficulty in finding and recognizing others. They live in communities wherever the clay is to be found, and they hold little or no association with the outside world. In North Carolina, South Carolina and Georgia, during my three months of travel, I must have met fully /one thousand people who were addicted to this habit. Ido not think that in all the number I saw one man or woman who was 50 years of age, though, as I before stated, even the young looked pro tern aturally old.

In intelligence these people are quite on a par with the lowest savages of Polynesia. and compared with them, the most ignorant black field hand of the South are demigods in intellect. Of morality they have no conception. They are as ignorant of anything like education as the. pigmies of the great African forest. Of God and the hereafter they have only the most savage conceptions, though even the children swear with a Dicturesque fluency that is at first startling. It is a curious fact that when the Cherokees occupied much of the country those of the tribe who contracted the clay-eating habit were at once ostracized and treated as pariahs, and I am inclined to think it was from the Indians that the early white settlers contracted the habit that has resulted in their complete degradation.

FACIAL RESEMBLANCES.

Why People Living Long Together Resemble Each Other. ' The fact that two people who live long together tend to look alike is accounted for by unconscious mimicry reacting upon the muscles of expression in the same way that a ruling passion does. The tendency, says a writer in Blackwood’s Magazine, to facial imitation is very general— in lact, almost universal— and may be so marked as to be easily noticed; so that when two people are engaged in animated conversation, the expression of the listener may often be seen to echo that of the speaker. How “infectious” is a smile or a laugh, even when the idea which gave rise to it in the first case is not transferred! Several times, when talking to young people, I have suddenly and purposely adopted some change of expression, such as raising of the eyebrows; and this, although not the least apropos to the words spoken at the time, has instantly evoked a like movement on the faces before me. The response was quite involuntary and was a pure piece of instinctive reflex action. Why does a yawn spread like pestilence through the room when conversation flags? I know of those who have started such an epidemic by a little piece of acting, and not a mouth in the company (save the guilty one) knew wLy it gaped. Have not we all noticed that a man of marked individuality becomes a center of physical influence to those who .wait on his words, so that his gestures, tones of voice and turns of phrase are reI know a tutor whose peculiarities of speech and carriage have been adopted more or less by every one of his pupils during the last six years, and several of them have coiiie to resemble him in features. This unconscious imitation of expression is very noticeable in children. Has it occurred to many careful parents that the good looks of their daughters may depend in no slight degree upon their choice of nurse girls and governesses?

For some reason which we cannot fathom the imitative faculty is so ingrained in us that what the eye perceives the brain makes haste to reproduce without stopping to ask our permission; and where two people live long together the‘facial muscles of each are constantly receiving stimuli prompting them to mimicry, As in the case of the emotions these influences may be infinitesimal at any given moment, and may give rise to no visible change of expression. Yet in the course of time they tend to mold the whole countenance, feature for feature, into an almost exact facsimile of another.

Longevity.

From the Medical Record we learn that the average duration of life in woman exceeds that of man. It is, however, subject to great variations during its continuance. During the first year of existence 112.80 male babies out of 1,000 perish at birth, whereas only 92.64 females succumb, and at the end of the year the girl baby has the advantage of 81.87, as against 85.08. She holds this vantage ground up to her fourth year. From now until the twelfth year the female mortality is 4.28 and the male only 8.56. From the twelfth to the fortysixth year the mortality of the sexes is about even. From fortv-six to fifty-six, the period of the climacteric, the gain in male mortality is much greater than that of the female, being 6.32 per annum for the male per thousand, and only 3.47 for his more fortunate sister. This will surprise must people, but indisputable statistics absolutely establish the fact that the period of the cli-‘ macteric is much more fatal to man than to woman. After forty-six the female averages longer than male life. It is also a singular fact that there is also a plurality of female births, which would appear to indicate an excess of feminine humanity, which, however, is probably not the case.—f Atlanta Constitution.

He Had to Give it Up.

When M. Casimir-Perier became the president of he had some very large and sentimental notions about the responsibilities of his office to the common people, and his duty to look out for the worthy in distress. The beggars and bummers of Paris soon found out his weak spot, and ho was continually besieged by unfortunate workmen out of employment (as they represented themselves) and all that sort of thing. At first housed to answer many such appeals himself at his gates, and no applicant went away empty-hand-ed. The police authorities ventured to remind him that there was a law against begging. “But there is none against charity,” he magnificently replied. At first he tried hard to believe that the army of tramps which beset him would not last long, but finally the police, by spotting and tracing the people who made appeals to his benevolence, and showing him their records, managed to disabuse hisl mind, and he consented to allow them to deal with the beggars. The majority of them were professional vagabonds, and he has been emancipated from them. O ! Handsome patterns and grades in miroir velvet, in elegant fruit foliage, and wine shades, are to be put upon the market early in the season to retail at the low priee of $1.25 a yard, fine quality.

REVIVAL OF BUSINESS

CALAMITY CROAKERS NOW OUT OF A JOB. Prosperity Follows Close Upon the Heels of the New Tariff—Censn. Figures that Talk In Thunderous Tones WheatGrowers Are Benettted. Facts that Are Facts. Calamity croakers will have to take a back seat. Prosperity is following closer upon the heels of the new tariff bill than the greatest optimist dared to hope. Business of all kinds is starting up and prospects for the future are unusually bright As an answer to those who insist that the new tariff law is destructive to business, the Syracuse. N. Y., Courier publishes the following list of concerns that have resumed, are making additions, etc. These facts relate to tims prior to Sept. 15: The Providence worsted mills are now running full time and full capacity. The woolen mill at Manleo. R. L, is to be reopened after a shut down of several years. The Gregory woolen mill of Wickford, K. L.'ls once more running full time. The Stonewall Cotton Mill Company. Stonewall, Mass., is putting in new machinery. The Ruddy Thread Company, Worcester, Mast, will erect a 100x00 foot dye house, two storle3, with boiler house attached. Bliss, Taft & Co., of Norwich, Conn, woolen waste manufacturers, have ar-

THEIR "NEW” LINE OF FALL GOODS.

Noisy high-taritf curbstone fakers are trying to do business at tho old stand.

ranged to locate a branch office at Niagara Falls. The new Billing cotton mills. King’s Mountain, N. G, will bo. in operation in about two or three weeks. The Baltic Mills Company, Enfield, N. Q, has enlarged Its plant. J ho East Pond Manufacturing Company. Newport, Me., Is to add ten more looms to the woolen mills, which will glvo an output of one-third more capacity than now. The Nemadji woolen mills, a new corporation at Superior, Wls., Is capitalized j at 520,000. .The machinery of the Elvorside Woolen I Company at Lobanon, N. Y., Is being Increased. At a recent mooting of the stockholders of tho Modena cotton mills. Gastonia, N. G, it was decided to put on TO more looms and 3,000 spindles. Hurst & Rogors. manufacturers of tapestry carpets at Philadelphia, contemplate putting In additional looms The erection of a cotton mill Is contemplated at Tifton, Ga. Tho Hartwell woolen mill. Old Town, Me., will be improved and new machinery added. An addition of 20x12 and another story aro being built. The Lowell. Mass., machine shop has orders on hand for 300 ring spinning frames from the Tremont and Suffolk, and one for like machinery for tho Duffle mills of Fall Elver. Enlargements are being made to Rhodes Brothers’ factory at Ashton Mill, Pa. The Edgemount Company of Omaha, Neh., Is building a woolen mill at Edgemount, Nob. and will begin production in three months. The Linden Manufacturing Company, Davidson, N. C., Is making plans for enlarging ltwmilis bv the addition of more looms and other machinery. A company has, been organized at Sauk Center, Minn., to manufacture woolen goods. The Nonotuck Silk Company Intends building an addition to Its mill at Hartford, Coon. The woolen mill at East Lyon, E. 1., which has been idle for several years, has orders ahead for a year, and will start up. Tho Plnovllle cotton mills, Plnevllle, N. G, have been sold to Siephen A. Jencks. of Pawtucket, It I. The mills will bo doubled in size. Tho Globe Mill. Clark & Co., proprietors, Augusta, Ga, manufacturers of yarns, have lately put in four looms, and will manufacture drills, sheeting, etc. They expect to commence operation In three weeks. A new mill, tho Tuckapahaw. Is being built near Wellford, S. C. It will be five stories high, 300 feet long and 100 feet wide, with a capacity of 30.000 spindles. Nearly all the stock (51.000.000) In the new Melrose cotton mill at Raleigh, N. G. has been taken, and the work on tho factory will probably be commenced tills fail. The new addition now being built to Odell Manufacturing Company’s mill at Concord. N. G, Is to bo a cloth and slasher building, two stories high, 65x30 feet. Fifty-four Wbittln looms will bo put In and 1,800 more spindles for manufacturin'' white cloth. Hertzer fc Donjes are building a new hosiery at Meterstonn. Pa. J. W. Wagley Is about to start a small knit goods factory at Hannibal. Mo, A new company has Incorporated at Barnesville. Ga. to manufacture knit underwear. They commenced manufacturing Sept L New hosiery mills are reported as about to be built at Reading and Wonielsdorf Pa Tho Nazareth Manufacturing Company of Nazareth, Pa, has let the contract for additional buildings. The Globe Knitting Mills. Norristown. Pa, have completed a Ibree-story building. About 525,000 are being expended by the Kllburn Knitting Macblno Company in enlarging Its plant at Martlnsburg. XV. Va , and erecting a dyeing plant. , The Forsyth Dyeing Company, of New Haven, Conn., Is adding knitting machinery fur the manufacture of hosiery, Kelley & Elspr Is the name of a new concern running a knitting mill at Wakefield street, Germantown. Pa. ho Roxford Knitting Company, manufacturers of men and women’s underwear. has been incorporated at Philadelphia. with a capital stock of 550,000. A movement for the establishment of a knitting mill at Madison, Ga.. has been Inaugurated. The Patent Knitting Mill Is a now concern just started at Towanda. Pa. J. Taylor, of No. 835 Arch street, Philadelphia. reports the sale of knitting machinery to James A. Parr, of Amsterdam, N. Y.; A. Boyle & Bro.; John Melr, of Valdese. N. G; Joseph W. Durbin; the Patent Knitting Mill of Towanda, Pa. ; the Forsythe Dyeing Company, of New Haven, Conn.; Kelly & Elser. of Germantown, Pa.; and Pfeiffer’s Mill, of Riverside. N. J. The Star Knitting Company and H. Strauss Knitting Works. Chicago, have put In a full line of Nye & Tredick automatic knitting machines for ladles and men’s ribbed underwear. James A. P trr Is starting a new mill at Amsterdam, N. Y., for the manufacture of hosiery. Farmers' Gains. The additions to the free list in the new tariff will save the people of this country many millions of dollars. It will save them directly more than 111,-

OCO.OfO, the amount of tax paid in 1803 on the principal articles now added to the list It will save them the much larger sum that the protected manufacturers and producers were enabled by the tariff to charge for the domestic articles. The duty on some of the articles now placed on the free lLt was prohibitory. For example, the duty on petroleum shut out all fore ; gn competition. The tax on binding-twine wu so large that it gave to the Cordage Tru-t the monopoly of the business and enabled it to fix its own price. It is evident, therefore, that the tax must have coat the farmers more than the $249.T9 which was the whole amount collected by the government on binding-twino in Is!*:?. The duty on hoop and bana iron manufactured wholly o • partially into ties was also nearly prohibitory. In 18911 the Government received only $12,211 from this tax, and this was paid by the farmers who grow cotton, it was not all that these farmers paid, however, for the tax of 40 per cent, permitted tho ironmasters or Pennsylvania to increase their prices to the point at which importation was too expensive to be profitable. Under the new law the cotton-planters will bo relieved of tho tax on tho iron ties for tholr ba'os. The wheat-growers will be benefited still more. Besides binding-twine, burlaps and bags for grain are made free. Tne tax paid on these articles amounted in to the very large sum of $2,02),331. The farmer did not pay all of this, but he paid a good deal of It. and he will find that tho removal of the tax will make his crops of grain more valuable to him. Another article which Is necessary to

the farmer is salt. In 1893 the tax col> looted on salt amounted to $102,000. For many years the fish-packers of Now England have had tliolr salt froe of duty, but the farmers have paid tho tax on the salt used by them for curing pork and feeding their cattle. Now both stand on an equal footing under the revenue law of the country.—Now York World.

Saying Nothin* Abont, McKlnleylsm. The most remarkable things abou the present Republican campaign are the things not discussed. Not only is the “hated" income tax treated with silent contempt, but noxt to nothing is said about what kind of a tariff we may expect when the Republicans again have full Bway. Even McKinloy is not promising that his “bravest and best tariff measure ever pa-sed,” as the New \ ork Tribune fondly stylod it, will be re-enforced when the Republicans are again in power. The most that he will say is that the country must have "protection" and will not survive without it. Harrison and Reed are, if possible, more unsatisfactory than McKinley upon this point. They confine their efforts mainly to the “hard times” that are the result of Democratic rule, neglecting to state that these hard times began while Republican laws wore still enforced by Republican officials, and that prosperity hai begun to return swiftly as soon as tho McKinley law was abolisho I. Tlius far only one Republican orator could be inveigled into making any definite statements as rogards tho prospects for fut lire tariff legislation under Republican sup omacy. In Illinois Senator Cullom was asked by Franklin MacVeagh, the Democratic candidate for Unit d States Senator, if tho McKinley law would bo re-enactod il the Republicans rogainod power. The Senator ha arded the prediction that the McKinley law would no. be re-enacted in its entirety. He said that after it had been in force four years it needed revising, and that if the Republicans had continued in power they would undoubtedly have revised it in aecordunco with their policy in tho past. Tne Senator did not explain his Delphic answer by stating if he meant a revision upwards or one downwards. The “policy” of Republicins, as stated in their platforms. is to roform downwards: their practice has boon to reform upwards. This leaves us still in tho dark—just where all shiewd Republicans intend to leave us. They don t dare say McKinley bill to us again, and of course they can t promise to do just what tho Democrats are doing. But it doesn't matter much, anyway. Kepublicans will never again make any tariff laws for us. There may be a /ow Hepublic n victories this fall, .but they are possib e only because the people know tho Republicans will be powerless to do harm. After one or two years of sober reflection under a Democratic tariff lsw, tho roople will conclude that they have no mere use for a party that stands for monopoly and nothing but monopoly.

By All Me«ns Inquire. An organ of the wealthy tax dodgers is urging voters to ask each candidate for the office of Representative in Congress: "Are you for or against the income tax?” This is a very proper inquiry. We trust that it may be made general and pointed. The votes in both the Rouse and Senate showed that an income tax was stronger in Congress than any other section.'of the revenue bill, it had 1.15 majoiity in the H use and 1(1 in the Senate. It has been indor-ed by every Demo ratio convention in the* South and We t, ant has been denounced by very few. if any, Uepublican conventions in those great sections of the country. Tom Reed is prudently silent about it in Maine. Tho Indiana Democratic Convention wa-> very emphatic in its approval of this most just measure for apportioning a part of the cost of government with special reference to benefits received and ability to pay. Perhaps as significant testimony to the strength of the income tax with the masses as has been given is found in the speech of Franklin MacVeagh, Democratic candidate for Senator in Illinois, at the opening of the campaign in that State. By all means catechise tho candidates.—New York World. A gkain of fine sand would cover one hundred of the minute scales of the human skin, and yet each of these scales in turn covers from 300 to 500 por»«

THE JOKER’S BUDGET.

JESTS AND YARNS BY FUNNY MEN OF THE PRESS. Time Not Wasted--Rival*--To Be Sure--A Violent Insinuation, Eto., Etc. .Etc. TIME XOT WASTED. Dashaway—While on a vacation I have been trying to sail a boat. Oleverton—How did you get on ! Dashaway—Not very well with the boat, but 1 learned how to swim.— [Judge. RIVALS. “‘Does Miss Mintly have the same lofty manners she had at tho first of the season?” ‘‘Mercy, no; not since she met Florence.” ‘‘How could that change Iter?” ‘‘Florence had six moro freckles than Miss Mintly.”—[Chicago InterOcean. TO HE SERE. Banks —Hero's a queer fashion item. It says, ‘ Baggy kneed trousers are coining to the front.” Rivers— Where else could they come?—[Chicago Tribune. A VIOLENT INSINUATION. Ruth—Harry told me, I was the first girl he over told ho loved. Kitty—When did ho tell you that? Ruth —Monday night. Why? Kitty—Oh, nothing; only he must have been lying to me Tuesday night. —[Detroit Free Tress. WHY HE DIDN’T. Jinkbots —You complain of the expense of a typewriter, why don’t you have your wife do It? Henpeck—l can’t dictate to my wife.—[Atlanta Constitution. AN AMBIGUOUS ANSWER. ‘‘She is a great favorite with tho male sox.” “Yes.” “Why don’t, she marry?” “Her numerous engagements prevent hor.” MAY HE ANOTHER WEDDING. It is reportod that a girl in town has exercised her rights, and asked a young man to bo her blushing husband. Ho bus taken a week to consider, and is finding out In tho meantime how much the girl oarns a month, and if she would bo “near.”—[Atchison Globe. NO ILL WIND, ETC. Mrs. Dix—Your husband* must suffer terribly with his coughing and sneezing when he lias hay fevor. Mrs. Hicks—To he sure ho does, hut you can’t think how it amusos the baby. AT KIKSHTSIGHT. Sho—Hero comes the brido and groom. Do you supposo it was a caso of love at first sight? He—Oh, yes. He caught a glimpse of the stub of hor father’s check book.—[Washington Star. woman’s ways. “Can you roiul my thoughts?” They were near the cold, gray ocean with its eternal pulsations. His ardent glance rested upon her glorious face. “No,” sho answered quietly; “I do not care for light reading.” A bittern rose near them, omitting a loud shriek as it took wing.

ALWAYS UNRELIABLE. Wife—l must goto fho doctor; I fear I’ve got dropsy. 1 weigh 250 pounds. Husband—Where were you weighed? Wifo—On your coal scales. Husband—Thon don’t worry, your weight is normal.—[Puck. DOTH VALUELESS. “Collingwood claims that his word is<as as his bond," said Twynn, “True enough," replied Triplett; “but his bond is worthless." THEY ALWAYS 1)0. Teacher—They buildod bettor than they knew. Do you understand that? Bright Boy—Yes’m, they rdwaya do. “Who always do?" “The architects, you know. Pop's nGy five thousand dollar house cost ten thousand.”—fGood News. not beyond the reach ok SCIENCE. ‘Oh, doctor! doctor I I’ve swallowed a filbert." ‘ Swallow a nutcracker, madam. Five dollars."—[Chicago Tribuno. A MISUNDERSTANDING. Timmins—l called to see about a littl-i poem I left hero—“To Phyllis" was she title. fcN'ffw Office Boy—Fillies? Two filliesV I guess you want to see do hone editor.—[lndianapolis Journal. NOT QUITE IN THAT LIGHT. Mr. Oldhi—Miss Sweetly, are you an admirer of old brass? Miss Sweetly—Well, er-I have only thought of you as a valued friend.—[Chicago Inter-Ocean. A PERSISTENT CREDITOR. Mm. Underhill—You made a great racket about my dressmaker’s bill, but I never said a word about your tailor. Underhill—Good heavens! Rita, you don’t seem to realize that dressmakers have to he paid.—[Truth. A KNOCK-OUT. Youth (tremblingly)—l-I-I have come to you. sir, the hand of your daughter. Father (briefly)—Which hand? — Detroit Free Press. WILLING TO DO HIS PART. “And you wish to bo treated?” paid the dentist. “No, begorrah,’’ replied Mr. Dolan. “You shtop the'hurrut in this toot, an’ Oi’ll trate to anythin’ yez want.” —[Washington Star. lIE HAD BEEN THERE. “W-w-where are you g-g-g-g-g-go-ing?" asked one. “G-g-going t-t-t-to tho stut-stut-stut-stammering institute,” said the othqr. “G-g-g-g-good pup-pup-pup-place," said the first. “They kick-kick-kick-cured me."—[Boston Home Journal.

TIMING THE KICT. Dibbles —Is it true that Karher’s father kicked on your coming to their house? Dudell fsadly)—Er—no; on my going.—[Buffalo Courier. NOT TIMELY. “Angelina,” he said, with a gurgle in his voice which betrayed great emotion, ‘‘you have come into my life like a ray of sunshine.” “Don’t, George, dear,” she exclaimed, entreatingly, “Ray of sun shino is very nice, but just now it is so unseasonable.” [Washington Star. A CORRECTION. He—What is ho going to do after he graduates? She—Wouldn’t it be more appropriate to ask “Whom is he going to do?”—[Truth. BY THE SAD SEA WAVE. Alice—ls we stay on this rock much longer t he tide will wash us off. Time and tide, you know, will wait for no man. Mario (mournfully)—That’s where they differ from us.—[Brooklyn Life.

DISINTERESTED ADVICE. Prof. Van Note—You vish to learn to play do cornet, oh? Vy not tako de mandolin insteat? Youth—l like the cornet hotter. “Yah, may he so, hut you vos not strong enough tirlearn de cornet." "I can inanngo it easily.” “Yah, may be, hut gan you manage de neighbors?” —[Good News. WORKS ROTH WAYS. Agitator—Look at tho difference 8 of condition among citizens! Whon a man owns a steam yacht it’s a sign that there Inis been a robbery somowhere. Ex-Millionaire—Guess that’s so. I bought threo or four of them, and was robbed every time.—[New York Weekly. READ IT IN HER EYES. Itwasono of thoso soft, witching moonlight nights when there is a big business done in Cupid’s confessional. “Until I mot you, Adolo,” he murmured in a voice husky with emotion, “I believed all women were decoitful; hut when I look into your clear, beautiful eyes, I behold there tho very soulof’candor and loyalty.” “Goorgo,” sho exclaimed with enthusiasm, “this Is tho happiest moment of my life since papa took mo to that. Piirisucullst.” . “Paris oculist 1” “Yes, dear; you never would have known that my loft eye was a glass ono. ” Then tho moon went under a cloud nnd Goorgo rolled over and burled his faeo In tho moist grass.—[J udgo. . NOVELTIES IN NECKWEAR. _ Pretty Notions to Suit All Complexions. Tullo and gauze, “ as thin of substance as tho air, and moro Inconstant than tho wind,” aro the chosen fabrics for thoso little fripperies in neckwear which go so far toward tho perfection of a costume. With only one gown not too pronounced as to color, many changes may bo rung by varying tho neck trimming. A lovoly yoke offoct has just been brought out which may he made In all colors to suit all complexions. Tho material is a gauze ribbon, with a moire edge and about five inches wide. The example shown was In a deep pink of the shade known as corradiuin. The yoke is outlined with a gathered frill ot tho ribbon, over which is a row of pointed Venetian lace In deop butter-yellow. Folds of tho ribbon perpendicularly form tho yoke itself, and tho collar fastens at tho back with a rosette and lias a full rosette at each side of tho front. A few pretty fancies in neckwear

VARIOUS COLLAR ADORNMENTS.

are pictured. One is a collar band, with a bow of white chiffqn. The loops ure wired, and, the ends are trimmed with Valenciennes lace. Another is a picture collar in citroncolorod vandyked luce, partly veiled with two long ribbon streamers which hang from the rosette bow in either satin or velvet attached to the centre of tho neckband at the back. The others show a collar of chiffon, with rosettes that fasten at tho back and a folded velvet collar in cerise, with a jabot of lace in front. The “Flagstaff” collars in lace are likely to be popular for some time yet to come, and all are finished off with full throat bands infancy gauze or ribbon. These ribbon bands may be bought separately, but can also be easily made at home. A yard of satin or ivatered ribbon is sufficient, and about three inches wide. The length for the band is cut off, each end laid in a side plait and hemmed over, with a couple of hooks and eyes for the fastening. The rest of the ribbon is knotted up in a butterfly bow, and fastened atone end of the neck-band, which hooks at the back. The favorite colors in these ribbons are maize, cherry-red, deep rose, cornflower, blue, lettuce green and eminence purple. The same shades may be found in gauze and chiffon, either plain or gauffered, and one new and prettly collar band is made of rosettes of gauze, alternating with knots of ribbon in the same shade exactly. The perfect skeleton of a mastodon has been unearthed near Dunkirk. N. Y.