Democratic Sentinel, Volume 18, Number 36, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 21 September 1894 — A COWBACK RIDE. [ARTICLE]

A COWBACK RIDE.

A Reverend Gentleman's Awkward Predicament. A college student in one of oar Western States recently returned homo after his course was finished, to find that his father, a clergyman with a small salary, was eking out his living by running a small farm. One of the udjuncts of the farm was a cow, a pretty good unimul, which, however, had a strong aversion to being milked. Hero was an opportunity for a display of tho lately acquired knowledge of the juvenile collegian. “Father,” said he, “Professor G. says if one will place a weight upon a cow’s back it will make her give down the milk.” Tho reverend gemlcman, favorably impressed with this information that his son lm:l learned from Professor («., decided to try the simple remedy. Instead, however, of placing a weight upon the cow’s back, the clergyman placed himself upon it. But then ho answered the purpose. The cow, however, was still obstinate. "Tie my legs under the cow,” said the father to tho son. Tho son did so. But the cow, unused to such unusual and arbitrary proceedings, manifested her displeasure by rearing and plunging, entiroly unmindful of tho dignity of the personage astride her spinal column. It was getting altogether too interesting for the two bipeds concerned in the transaction. “Cut. the rope! Cut tho ropel” shouted Mr. V. to his dutiful son, meaning the rope by which he was attached to the cow. But (lie son, being somewhat excited, cut (ho rope by which the cow was fastened to the stanchion. At once availing herself of tho liberty thus offered, the cow tookjan unceremonious exit from the stable, and down through the street she went. Tho minister accompanied the cow, but in a manner not exactly befitting the dignity of his profession. As it happened, one of tho sisters of tho congregation was on the street as tho race was in progress. Surprised at such a sight, tho good sistqr called out, “Why, Brother V., whore are you going?” His sense of tho ludicrous coming to his aid, Brother V. shouted back: “The Lord and tho cow only know. I don't!” Tlio clergyman was eventually rescued from iiis awkward porch, and never attempted tho feat again.— The Voice.