Democratic Sentinel, Volume 18, Number 11, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 30 March 1894 — Page 6

ftljt JcmflcrettcSentincl RENSSELAER, INDIANA. J. W. McEWEN. - - - Ptrnusm »■ ' ■

LIGHTNING COOKERY.

HOW ELECTRICITY OPERATES IN THE KITCHEN. Cooking Utendli and Paraphernalia—Frytag, Bakins. Broiling and Heating by ■teftricity—Enormoo* Waete la tha Cm •f Old Style Fuel. No Dirt or Ashea. The application of electricity to affairs domestic is a subject that demands the attention of all mankind. For some time past electricity has

0. B. copper bottom: 8. 0. till cate cement; 8. W. specially drawn copper wires. BBCTION AND BOTTOM Of KBTTLB. been Used in a limited way by the demonstrators at various “food show” cooking schoola It required the World’s Fair to bring the subject before the public in all its prominence. What does electric cooking mean? It means the absence of the old-fash-ioned range and more—no coal! no smoke! no ashes! It means no building of kitchen fires on hot summer mornings; it means the emancipation of fire builders. The workings of the electric current are less understood by the gen-

eral public than any other subject connected with our mercantile and domestic life. The current may be likened to running water, and with this idea one has the best illustration. If water be run through a pipe two inches in diameter, into a smaller pipe, say one inch in diameter, the result attained is pressure in the smaller pipe. Run electricity through a wire one-quarter inch in diameter, and it gives no apparent result, but turn this same current into a smaller wire and the result is heat, as shown in the ordinary incandescent lamp. The small wire cannot handle the current fast enough; therefore it gets hot This is the fact that governs electric cooking. The reader may say, “This is plain so far, but the electric light globe has practically no heat about it.” The explanation is this: The wire In the electric light globe is in a vacuum and is on this account surrounded to a certain extent by a non-conductor, hence the heat radiation is very small. If it were possible to surround a red hot stove with a glass case and to pump all the air from the case, the heat would not be felt to any great degree.- Imagine au ordinary frying pan with a veil of fine wire beneath it, this wire surrounded with a packing which would retain and convey the heat, the wire and packing covered with a metal case as

ELECTRICAL STEWPAN.

shown by the dark ring on the bottom of the pan In the illustration. The pan with the electrical arrangement does not differ from the ordinary pan, except for the fact that It Is slightly heavier and has a wire attached. By connecting this wire with the socket board and turning a button, similar to that on the electric light, the pan is heated almost as quickly as the explanation is made. The broiler, oven, coffee pot, tea “kettle and hot water tank are all operated in the same manner. The advantages of using electricity are so great, and so numerous that it would be impossible to convey the . facts on paper. Suffice it to say that there is none of the disagreeable dust or heat, no smoke nor danger of fire. In the ordinary stove the heat generated is 100 per cent. . Of this heat 80 per cent goes up the chimney, 15 per refht warms the air In the room and incidentally the cook; the remaining 5 per cent is all that can be used for cooking. With the new appliances nearly all the heat is utilized in cooking, and the radiation is scarcely perceptible; hence the economy. For example, take the flat iron. Ironing day in summer it dreaded by all who have to do with it. By using the electric iron the work seems a pleasure compared with the old way. The-Iron is attached to the socket, and in oae minute it is hot, and Its heat is all oc the under side. It re-mains-at an even temperature all day, and one iron is all that Is required- The cost of running an iron is about two cents per hour. The electric iron may be attached to an ordinary incandescent lamp socket by

removing the globe and screwing the iron wire in place. The oven may be run for five cents an hour and the broiler for the samd figure. The oven heat may be graduated by means of a switch. Pans pots can be run at about the same cost The fact that the current is used only for the time of cooking makes the cost somewhat less than when coal is used. ' There are a number of kitchens in practical use in New York and Brooklyn, says a New York paper, and the most desirable results are obtained. An Electrical Kitchen. In the kitchens of these houses the coal stove has no place; and the gas-jet for lighting or heating is unknown. AH cooking and water-heat-ing is done by the electrical current, which the cook switches on from the wires In the kitchen wall as she requires it. Against the wall stands a table, or rather a small bureau, fitted with drawers and doors, and with a top of solid, blue slate. This is the stove, but it has no direct connection with the heating or cooking. It merely serves as a table on which to place the electrical cooking utensils, which are all thus highly insulated. To the left Stands the boiler, in which the water is kept at a gentle heat On the same side, on an Iron stand, Is the electric oven, divided into several compartments, the upper of which is the plate-warmer. Pipes are led from the boiler to the sink faucets on the other side of the bureau. Hung over a hook in the wall are a number of twisted cords, with a glass screw-plug at one end and a push-plug at the other. These cords are made of very fine copper threads twisted together and insulated by rubber and cotton. Each cord has two strands, each of which is a conductor, one for the negative and one for the positive. In early days these were distinguished by making

A MODEL ELECTRICAL KITCHEN.

them of different colors, but this practice ha?/been abandoned since it was discovered that it did not matter which course the current took. Upon other hooks, or shelves, are the cooking utensils—teapots, coffee-pots, saucepans, frying-pans, water-kettles, stew-pans, etc. An entire outfit is there, and each Utensil is within easy reach of the cook. There is also ranged on thestudves a series of flat-

irons Above the table, or bureau, are a number of receptacles to receive the screw-plugs, which are attached to the ends of the cords, and above each is a small switch, of which all that can be seen is a small projecting key similar to that used in the gas-cocks of chandeliers. The mode of operation is extremely simple, and the densest greenhorn could familiarize herself with it in less than five minutes. If an order comes to the kitchen for some coffee, Mary takes down the coffee-pot, charges it with the fragrant berry and the due amount of water, and stands it upon the slate bureau top. She then unhooks one of the cords and screws the glass plug into its receptacle on the wall; the other end of the cord has two small plugs. These she pushes into receptacles in the base of the pot, and turns the switch. In a few minutes the water is boiling, and in a few more the stimulating liquid ascends to the epicures Upstairs. The process is just as simple for all the other utensils. All are operated in the same way. Nothing could be simpler and nothing in the cooking way cleaner. The process of stewing, however, requires different conditions. Here it is necessary to regulate the amount of heat so that the stew may be kept at the right temperature. The regulation is effected by wiring the circuits in a special manner, so that the various necessary temperatures can be obtained. Perfection In the system was not obtained without much thought and considerable experiment. Resistance wires—that is, wires which are not

ELECTRI KETTLE.

good conductors, “and ‘which offer resistance to themassage of the electrical heated in the ' wrapped in asbestos. This* was too crude, and the wires weye then imbedded in enamel. Here th|fun,began, , Enamel after enamel jfca£ tried; b|it almost as soon as the current was f urned onto the wires, crack would go the enamel, and the task had to be renewed.

ELECTRICAL FLAT IRON.

Finally an enamel of silicate, or, rather, a cement, was discovered, and electric-cooking became a fact. Its application to the utensil may be seen from the illustration. Etectrio Oveaa and Utemtl*. Electric ovens are usually provided with several circuits, placed at the top or sides. It is divided into several compartments, each of which can be supplied with heat at adifferenttemperature, so that meat may be cooking in the lower and the plates kept mildly warm in the upper. The oven is air-jacketed and has bright interior surfaces, so that all the heat is retained. A small Incandescent lamp suspended in the interior permits of the cook watching the cooking process through a small window of thick, transparent mica; These ovens, when heated for a quarter of an hour, carry on most

COOKING UTENSILS.

cooking operations without further heating. They act like bakers’ ovens, where the fire is applied fora certain time and then raked out, after which the oven has to carry on the baking for the rest of the day with the heat contained in itself. These ovens will, probably, be brought into more common use by the companies supplying current, which will push their use as the gas companies are pushing the gas stoves. The electric griddle is just an Iron plate, upon the bottom of which are set the wires in a bed of enamel; and during the World’s Fair a skillful colored cook was kept pretty busy during the day turning out buckwheat and griddle cakes to an admiring throng, composed mostly of women. The gridiron is perhaps the only kitchen utensil which cannot be directly heated. But an electric fire to grill things over is obtained by running the bare wires closely together in and out over a small asbestos mat As soon as the current is switched on the wires become incandescent, and a strong heat is thrown upward toward the meat or fish set over it on the gridiron. The fumes are carried off up a special chimney. The rapid adaptation of electricity to the heatingof flatirons and thegeneral work of a laundry is proved by a case in England, where a large building, formerly a flourmill, was turned into a steam laundry. The old mill waterwheel was turned to account in driving an eighty-light dynamo, and not only is the whole building lighted by electricity, but all the linen is smoothed and glossed by the electrically heated irons. The outlay was small; the satisfaction complete. Electricity is an excellent servant, and it is slowly being trained to new duties. Its uses are manifold, and its benefits innumerable. The only obstacle to its general use for household purpose is the high price of both utensils and current The utensils are undergoing a process of cheapening, and we may shortly see electrical cooking and heating a matter of as everyday occurrence as the gas stove.

How a Rubber Forest Looks.

According to recent accounts of the reckless manner in which forests of rubber trees are destroyed, india-rub-ber will soon be much more scarce and costly than it now is, and when that happens it is probable that somebody will Invent a substitute. At present, however, it is interesting to know what a recent traveler says of the india-rubber forests of Nicaragua. “A forest of them may be detected without the eyes of an expert, for they are scored and dying from the wounds of the machete, the big knife used by the natives. The ordinary specimen of Nicaragua is from fifty to one hundred feet high, and about two feet in diameter. “The bark is white and the leaves oval, with a slight inclination downwards. The cuts are made about two feetapart, and usually extend from the ground to the first branch, channels being scored in the sides to lead the jmce into a bag. The average yield of a tree is from five to seven gallons of milky fluid. “This is mixed with the juice of the ‘wisth,’ which hastens congelation. After this operation the crude, rubber is baled up and shipped north to be refined and further prepared for commerce. Another tree, very similar to the rubber tree, and often mistaken for it, is the cow-tree. This yields a liquid very much like milk in taste and appearance. ”

Uncle Sam’s Tropical Islands.

CapL John Ross, in speaking of something recently published in regard to the undesirability of the United States owning islands so far away as the Hawaiian Islands, says that it does not appear to be generally known that the United States owns seventy-five islands in the North and South Pacific. They are nearly all within twelve degrees of the equator, north or south, and are principally guano islands of small size, which have been taken possession of J>y Americans. The American coastng laws apply to them, and foreign Vessels are restricted from carrying the guano from them to the United States. Many of these islands are laither from the coast than the Harahan Islands, so Capt Ross thinks here could be no objection to the Jnited States owning the latter also. 4-Portland Oregonian.

Preserving Timber from Insects.

| Experiments made in France have shown that the reason the sap-wood in timber is worm-eaten is because of Ihe existence of starch in IL It is he starch that the insects are after, snd they do not attack the hard ivood because it contains no starch. The experimenters have devised a jnethod of preserving timber from such attacks. In the spring they cut i ring through the bark around the upper end of the trunk, and suppress all buds that are developed there. By autumn the starch has disappeared from the sap-wood and the tree is ready to be felled. Timber thus prepared, it is said, does not become worm-eaten.

WHAT “GENTLEMEN" MAY DO.

They Need Not Pay Tradesmen'* Bills, bat They Most Flay Cards Fairly. There are many things which it appears a gentleman may do nowadays in Europe without incurring the loss of his right to that designation by society or forfeiting what the latter regards as his “honor,” says a writer in the New York Tribune. Thus he may avoid paying his creditors, provided they are tradespeople or friends, who, instead of being content with his plighted word, have accepted the additional security of a promissory note. Indeed, the passing of any paper between creditor and debtor is held to remove the obligation from the list of debts of honor and places it among the so-called “tradesmen’s debts,” the nonpayment of which involves no loss of “gentilhommerie” or of “honor.” Debts of honor, that is to say, loans based merely upon verbal obligations and bels, must be paid at all cost, according to the ethics governing the ‘‘code of honor,” even if the debtor has to obtain the money by means of methods which verge not only upon the dishonorable, but even on the criminal. It is for this reason that we sometimes hea/ of young men going to the length of stealing their mother's jewels or of forging the name of their nearest and dearest relatives, as did the eldest son of an English peer the other day, for the sake of paying their debts of honor, failing which, they can no longer hope to retain the social status of a gentleman. One has heard of men committing suicide, like young Count Aloys Hardegg a few weeks since at Vienna, and the last Marquis of Hastings, years ago in London, because they were unable to pay their “debte of honor,” but one has never heard of a gentleman taking his own life because he could not pay his tailor. Connection with a divorce suit, far from detracting from the “status of i gentleman,” is, on the contrary, rather a feather in his cap, excepting in cases where the co-respondent prefers to speak the truth and acknowledge his guilt rather than perjure himself in the witness box “like a gentleman.” The most mortal of all sins in the eyes of society, the one that entails above everything else the forfeiture of the title of gentleman and of all honor, is unfair play at cards; and it is no secret that the majority of the great families in Europe would infinitely prefer to have a murderer among their relatives than a man convicted of the offense which resulted in the social ostracism of Sir William Gordon Cumming, of the Duke of Roxeburghe’s son-in-law, George Russell, and of Major, the Hon. Walter Harbord, brother of Lord Suffleld. These perhaps are the principal things which a “gentleman” and “a man of honor” may and may not do according to the tenets of old-world society. The latter may be summed up in brief as the payment of debts of honor, reticence with regard to all “affairs de cceur” and playing fairly at cards. Provided a man does not break these three commandments, he may commit every other sin with impunity, and, if only he be of gentle birth, his shortcomings will be regarded merely in the light of venial eccentricities.

A YOUTHFUL PRODIGY.

He Is Only Fifteen Year* Old. bat He Bumps the Scales at S3S Pounds. Wythe County, Virginia, numbers within its population the greatest man in the commonwealth, if one considers his dead weight—Melvin Grubb, whose wondrous girth and ponderous limbs make him the daily wonder of his neighbors, says the Richmond Times. He was born something more than fifteen years ago, and has ever since that event kept his neighbors wondering at his growth. Each year since he was ten has seen from 50 to 100 pounds added to his weight, until he is believed now to be the heaviest youth alive; and should his avoirdupois appreciate at the same rapid rate he will soon break all the heavy-weight records since Adam. At 13 years of age he weighed 410 pounds; at 14, 450 pounds; and now, at 15, the scales creak at 535 pounds; and the end is not yeL Grubb is not merely a mountain of flesh, but an active and intelligent boy. He can follow a plow all day without unusual fatigue, and is a bright and intelligent pupil of the public school near his father’s farm at Walter’s bridge, two and a half miles west of Wytheville.

HAIR DYEING AN ANCIENT ART.

From Cleopatra Down Women Have Resorted to the Dangerous Practice. The art of dyeing the hair is at least as old as the time of Christ; it was by resorting to such aids to beauty that Cleopatra tried to capture Caesar. All through history ladies of fashion have tried to improve upon nature by artificially coloring that which St. Paul tells us is their glory. In the heyday of Venice, the facile beauties of the city of the lagoons dyed their hair a red to which Titian was not ashamed to affix his name. The belle of belles ih that day had red hair, not bright red, but a dull red, with glints of crimson. More recently, almost in our own time, a rage arose for bright blonde hair, as to which there was a tradition that it had been popular with the Greek betaira?. Blonde heads blocked the thoroughfares, and young ladies of good repute did not disdain to employ the dyer until his services were monopolized by another class. In our day, the popular color is a bright shade of anburn. the blonde cendre of the boulevards, and silly girls go through martyrdom to impart that tint to their locks. For the popularity of blonde hair the argonaut finds this excuse, that it Is rarer than black or brown hair, and, finer. Everybody knows that the legend of the golden fleece was suggested by the ardor with which Jackson and* other Greek connoisseurs pursued the blonde-haired maidens of Colchis. Alihost all hair dyes consist of sulphur and acetate of lead, both of which are injurious to so delicate a plant as human hair. A steady course of either will impair the vitality of the hair papilla and may destroy the medulla altogether. Women who bleach their hair use peroxide of hydrogen, which, after a time,

I imparts an unnatural and wig-like luster to the hair. A more dangerous dye still has for its bases nitrate of silver. When this is used the hair is first washed with sulphuret of potassium: the nitrate is applied while it is still wet. In all these cases the drug is adulterated with a pigment of the desired color and the effect for the time is to substitute that color for the natural hue of the cortical substance or hair bark. It need hardly be said that the effect of a continued use of such medicaments is to enfeeble and ultimately to rot the root sheaths. Baldness then ensues, and for that science has discovered no remedy.

A HAIRY RACE.

The Ainas Are Perhaps the Most Degraded People Llrln e . The Alnus, who lived on the island of Yazo, Japan, are perhaps the lowest down in the scale of humanity of any race on earth. They are a hairy people, are filthy in their habits, and ignorant and superstitious Their

AN AINUS-MAX.

history for the last 2,500 years is to a certain extent known. They were supposed at one time to have occupied the Japanese archipelago, and to have been driven to Yezo, where they maintained their independence until the ninth century, then becoming subject to Japan. Their fierceness gradually left them, and they are now among the most peaceable and submissive of the earth’s inhabitants. At Yezo their number is estimated to be about 17,000. A century ago the Alnus were living in the age of stone. They are beyond it now only because they have obtained knives from the Japanese. They have no writing, no records of their past, and no aspirations. As is usual among barbarous people, the women do most of the work, the men to a great extent confining themselves to hunting. In moving a load or heavy object the Ainus never push, but always pull toward them. They appear to use the feet and toes very freely to help their bands and fingers, and they readily employ their teeth, preferring to pull with the teeth than with the hand when an unusually heavy haul Is necessary.

Sews On Buttons for a Living.

“Speaking about odd ways of making a living,” sild a lawyer, “lean tell you a new one, and it is followed by a man who says he does fairly well. He goes from office to office all over the city and does nothing but sew on buttons for men of all kinds, bachelors and boys and married men, too. It’s a nickel a button, and he generally furnishes the button, though in most cases he says the men have the buttons with them. As he enters an office his usual salutation is, ‘Buttons, buttons, any buttons off,’ and on either coat, vest or trousers every man is pretty sure to find a button off or nearly ready to come off. The genius carries his pockets full of buttons of every kind and class, and he seldom fails to match. His waxed threads, needles and scissors are ready at hand, and a man need not miss five minutes from his duties to be nicely repaired as far as buttons are concerned. The shrewd button sewer is not very communicative, but it’s a bad day when he fails to sew on twenty buttons. In one office, at least, where six or eight are employed, I saw him gather 40 cents in a half hour. And a girl paid him 10 cents of that amount if he would stitch two loose buttons on her jacket and hnake them firm.’ ” Cincinnati Tribune.

Simple Hospitality the Best.

Obvious effort in the way of entertaining is considered bad form in the best houses. Any eccentricity in table decoration or studied effects are, therefcre, to be avoided. The finest of damask, the best of cutlery, the most brilliantly polished silver and glass, and choice flowers in greater or less profusion, according to the character of the entertainment, are deemed all-sufficient by those who are in the habit of jeceiving their world constantly and as a matter of courpa “New people,” who are not only willing but eager to go to any amount of trouble and expense in the way of commending themselves to society, not infrequently overreach themselves and begin all wrong (a fatal mistake, by the waj; as to begin right is all important) through a want of perception and too n.uch effort. “Mrs. Outeredge will never get on,” was the verdict pronounced by a social magnate on a socially ambitious woman of her acquaintance. “I lunched there yesterday and everything was most offensively rich and studied—twenty people at the table —gold-threaded damask —a present with each bunch of flowers —and even to the eatables, everything was a surprise. It was wearisome and all a mistake. I really felt like telling her to.”—New York Tribune.

A Game of Photographs.

There is a new game which should find favor with hostesses, especially at this season. All the young lady participants in it produce photographs of themselves when babies, or at any rate when of a very tender age. These are arranged for inspection, and the young men are ushered in one by one to guess who are the originals. The one successful in guessing the most wins the game and receives the prize. Forcing vegation by use of the electric light, at night Is a new experiment being successfully made in Massachusetts. Hon. W. W. Rawson of Arlington claims to make a gain in this way of five ddys in each of his three crops of lettuce. The gain on one crop, he says', pays all the 'expenses of the electric light for the season, thus giving him the gain on the other two for extra profit.

HE KNEW HIS BUSINESS.

A Smart Boy Kamra How to Baa aa Ba- - glae and Bother a Parton. The writer paid a visit to the Mechanics’ Fair in Boston, and stood tor a moment near an engine in the basement. The engineer in charge possessed a bright little son whom he had taught the method of stopping and starting the machine. The little boy, who did not seem to be over 10 years of age, was standing by the engine when a gentleman came up to him and said: “You seem to be a pretty small boy to run such a big engine.” ' “I suppose I am pretty small," replied the boy, “but I can do it all right” “You think you understand your business?” continued the visitor. “Yes, sir, I da" “Can you start the engine?" “I can.” “Let’s see you start it ’ The boy opened the valve and the flywheel slowly started to resolve. “You really can do it, can’t you?” said the visitor. “Yes, sir,” modestly answered the boy. “Can you make it go backward?” asked the man. “Backward or forward, it doesn't make any difference to me,” replied the young engineer. “Let me see you run it backward.” The boy stopped the engine and quickly reversed it, so it ran in an opposite direction. “Well, I declare, my boy, you seem to understand your business perfectly. ” The boy said nothing for a moment, but eyed the stranger suspiciously. Suddenly an idea appeared to strike him, and he said: 1 “May I ask what your business is?” “Why, certainly; lam a minister of the gospel. ” “Where do you reside?” “Oh, right across the river here, In Cambridge. ” “Do you understand your business?" further questioned the youngster. “I believe I do,” replied the minister, good-naturedly. “Can you repeat the Lord’s Prayer?” “Why, certainly.” “Say it lor me,” requested the boy. The clergyman did so. “You really do know how, don’t you?” laughingly sa’d the little engineer. “Why, of course, I do; I repeat it several times a day.” “Well, now, say it backward; you know I ran the engine backward for you. ” The clergyman, after a moment’s hesitation, said he could not do it. “You can’t do it?” said the little fellow. “Well, you see, I understand my business a great deal better than you do yours. ” The clergyman appeared to think so, and retired.—Cassell’s Magazine.

A GREAT JUMPER.

Some of the Feate of the English Champion “Joe” Darby. Probably the greatest phenomenon of modern times in the jumping line is “Joe” Darby, the English cham. pion. Darby has met nearly all the cracks in England and has proved himself their master at all styles of jumping. The champion is 30* years of age

CHAMPION JOE DARBY.

and a native of Staffordshire. Some of his remarkable feats are as follows: Jump over twenty chairs, jump over six chairs in one jump, jump over two chairs 18 feet apart, jump over a horse 15 hands high, jump backward over two chairs. These are only a few of Darby’s feats, there being many others equally astonishing.

About Introductions.

Gentlemen do not ask for introductions to one another because they do not generally wish to become acquained, or If one desires to do so, he very properly hesitates to force himself on the attention of another person who may be unwilling to know him. Ladies do not under ordinary circumstances ask for introductions to one another for reasons which will be very readily understood. If one lady does ask, however, the person to whom she applies should find out before making the introduction whether it will be agreeable to the other lady. An exception to this rule, both for ladies and gentlemen, is found in the case where they are Invited especially to meet some person. One not only has a right to ask to be presented to the guest of the evening, but not to do so would often show a lack of courtesy. At a very large gathering, or where the honored guest is a person of distinction, one should not be too forward about pressing one’s claims', especially if the guest be already talking with those who might, be more agreeable to him. Modesty is usually a safe virtue to Cultivate. Another exception to the rule is found in cases were it is evident from the circumstances that the hostess has omitted the introduction, either from thoughtlessness or because she supposes that the ladies already knew each other. In this case the lady might ask the hostess to make the introduction.—Philadelphia Times

A Famous Bareback Rider.

James Robinson, who for a long time held the title of champion bareback rider of the world, is spending his declining years on his farm in Missouri. He is by no means an old man, but has retired from the circus arena. He still has many of the valuable gifts that he received in many parts of the world, including those from Queen Victoria and the old Emperor William of Germany.. Mr. Robinson is the same little wiry mab that he always was. and, except for his hair, has not the appearance of being more than 40 years old.

HUMOR OF THE WEEK

STORIES TOLD BY FUNNY MEN OF THE PRESS. KauT Odd, Curious, and Laughable Phaaei ‘ of Human Nature Graphically Portrayed by Eminent Word ArttaU of Our Own Day —A Budget of Fun. Bprinklee of Bplee. Yon can easily fill the public eye If you have the dust—Siftings. There is nothing more positive than a woman’s negative.—Yonkers Gazette. You never realize bow near an alarm clock is till it “goes off."— Yohkers Gazette Jones—What does he do? Brown —Do? Why, he does everybody.— Florida Times-Union. One reason why some men are sc lean is because they have thrown all their fat into the fire.— Dallas News. A tart is a little pie. but in the composing-room a little pl has often made more than one tart —Lowell Courier. Landlady—Do you like your steak rare, sir? New Boarder Yes, ma’am, rare as once a month.—Boston Courier. The whole money-getting world is running a race for a dollar which may be counterfeit when it is caught —Picayune. There’s a lesson to be learned from the pin, my son. It is given a head that it may not go too far.— Boston Transcript. Heiress—“ There’s a man after my own heart.” Papa—“ Who?” Heiress—“ The count But he won’t get it!”—New York World!” A London paper publishes the names of several public men who use hair-dye. The dark secret is out at last—Philadelphia Ledger. A State newspaper headed an article on the fall of a colored workman from a lofty building “A Chocolate Drop. ” —Philadelphia Record. Mabel—“Do you not think Mr. De Little a man of small caliber?” Grace —“Perhaps, but I’m sure of one thing: he’s a big bora”—London Life. i Burglar—Sho, miss, I wouldn’t harm a hair of your head. Young Woman—lt isn’t my hair that I’m thinking of; it’s my pocketbook.— Judge. The Heiress—l don’t see why you fell in love with so homely a girl as myself, George? George—Oh, my dear, I know you are as good as gold. —Judge. “How do you know she is plainlooking? You haven’t seen her.” “I wrote to her in praise of her intellectuality and she didn’t get miffed.”— Boston Transcript. “Religion,” says the Manayunk philosopher, “makes good armor in the battle of life; but many who are too lazy to fight use it as a cloak.”— Philadelphia Record. “Is Tompkins henpecked?" “Is he?” exclaimed Potts. “I should say he is. He doesn’t even dare to claim a full proprietary interest in his own rheumatism. ” —lndianapolis Journal. Weary Ruggles—“l’m goin’ to git m’ hair cut.” Dusty Rhodes—- “ Gee whizl Whut fer?” Weary Raggles (hysterically)—“Why, der people’s gettin’ to tike me fer a poet!” —Truth. A shuffle of frozen boots, a dull thud, a few , and another citizen is filled with regrets that he did not take to the middle of the street in the first place.—Pittsburg Dispatch. Sunday-school Teacher—What is your definition of an honest man, Johnnie? Johnnie (whose father is a First Ward politician)—A man who stays bought when he’s bought.— Philadelphia Record. Mrs. Portly Pompous—lt is a little strange that you are unwilling to Show your references. Servant—l hesitate out of consideration for those people who change their servants every week.—-Texas Siftings. Blobbs—“Did Funnicus enjoy himself at the church fair last night?” Slobbs—“Not a bit. There were oysters in the stew, and it was positively painful to see his disap. poiutment.”—Philadelphia Record. Jack—“ What’s Georgie doing yondah?” Reggy “Collecting his thoughts.” Jack—“ Well, if they’re as bad as his pokah debts he’ll dun himself into insanity before he gets there, b’ Jove!”—New York World. Politeness explained: Mrs. Morlarity (doing Paris) —“D’ye notice how polite these Frinchmen are to wan another?” Mr. Moriarity—“Yis, begorry! Ido belave each wan av thim is afraid av ivery other wan av them.” —Puck. ' Master (examining class In geography)—“What is the name of this town?” Pupil—“ Birmingham.” Master—“ What is it noted for?” Pupil—- “ Firearms. ” Master—“ What are firearms?” Pupil—“ Poker, shovel and tongs. ” —Tid-Bits. “Would you call Dexter a poet?” “No, sir. He is a riminal.” “A what?” “Riminal. That’s a word of my own. If a man who commits crimes is a criminal I don’t see why a man who commits rhymes shouldn’t be a riminal. * —Llfa i Auntie—Does your new doll close its eyes? Little Ethel—Yes’qj, but she is the most wakeful child 1 ever saw. She doesn’t shut her eyes when il lay her down, as sht> ta The Only way to make her go to sleep is to stand her on her head and shake her. —Good News.

Large “Gobblers."

The American bronze is the largest !of all turkeys. Some of the weights attained by it are almost fabulous. Birds have been known to reach more than fifty pounds, and a “gobbler" was imported some time ago by (the secretary of the Turkey,.Breeders’ <Club of Peterborough which weighed forty-five pounds and was a magnificent specimen of his The records of the great Birmingham show tell of old turkey cocks exhibited there weighlng mArly forty pounds, of hens thirty pounds, of young cocks tvtenty-nine pounds, and of young hens nineteen pounds; but these are birds fed up for the purpose, and are exceptional