Democratic Sentinel, Volume 17, Number 35, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 15 September 1893 — The Woman and the Rat. [ARTICLE]

The Woman and the Rat.

A housewife, whose cellar was infested by Bats baited a trap and finally managed to catch one, whose size and condition proved how often he had eaten her cake and cheese. Greatly rejoiced over the capture she was about to place the trap in a tub of water and drown it, when the Rat calmly inquired: “Your name is Jones, isn’t it?” “Yes—Jones.” “Wife of Sam Jones, who hasn’« sweat his collar for the last fifteen years?” “Yes.” “And over there on the grocery steps are Pete Clay, Jim Watson, Lile White and a dozen other chaps equally as lazy as Jones?” “Yes; the usual crowd has got together over there to chaw tobacco and talk horse,” replied Mrs. Jones. “Well, now," continued the Rat, “turn me loose into that lumber pile, and if you don’t get more fun out of the antics of that crowd than would load.a hayrack I’ll agree to return and be drowned.” After due reflection Mrs. Jones decided to try the experiment As the Rat ran for shelter he was observed by all, and a minute later, headed by Jones, the crowd was digging for the Rodent. For two long hours under a broiling summer sun fourteen men tossed that lumber around in hopes to come upon the Rat, and when the search was finally abandoned Jones had got up steam enough to bring out three boils which had laid dormant in his system for the last ten years, while at least half of the others had to go home and wash their necks and get into clean shirts. MORAL. “You see,” said the Eat to Mrs. Jones, as he met her down cellar next day, “dead opportunities are simply a source of regret, while live Issues, if properly grasped, lead up to success. ’’ —Free Press