Democratic Sentinel, Volume 17, Number 33, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 1 September 1893 — TOPNOODY'S TYPEWRITER. [ARTICLE]

TOPNOODY'S TYPEWRITER.

Mr*. T. Wai Inclined to Raise a Row About the New Acquisition. Mr. Topnoody was eating bis supper very peacefully, and was enjoying it so much that he had not noticed how ominously, quiet his wife was, at the other end of the table. “Topnoody, ” she said, with such force, just as he bit a piece out of a biscuit that he,almost choked on t, “Ii understand you have got a new typewriter In yonr office.” "Yes, my dear, I have,” he replied in innocent surprise. “Well, now,” she exclaimed, growing red in the face, “I won’t have it. A man at your age of life ought to know better, even if he has no regard for his wife and family. There are men who might, with a certain brazen effroutery. do as you have done, but a man of family, as you are, and a member of the church—l am shocked beyond utterance.” Mr. Topnoody looked as if he were suffering from the same sort of shock, for he was absolutely speechless. “Don’t try to deny it or to explain,” she went on angrily, “for you* have not only admitted it, but you have admitted itto me, and I shall — “But, my dear,” began Mr. T., recoveringihis utterance. “Don’t speak to me, ” she said, “.you. have taken that thing into your office when you promised me faithfully you never would have another, and, worst of all, this one is only 20 years old, and the other near 40 if she was a day,” and she began sobbing. “I don’t know, my dear, how old the other one was,” said Mr. T. with, a quiet smile, now that the light had dawned on him, “hut if the one I got yesterday is twenty years old, I’m going to raise a row with the agent whosold it to me, for he assured me it had just come from the factory.” “I’m an idiot,” sobbed -Mrs. T., looking up joyfully. “Yes, dear,” responded Mr. T., taking another bite out of the biscuit.—Free Press.