Democratic Sentinel, Volume 16, Number 38, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 7 October 1892 — AWOMANS INFLUENCE [ARTICLE+ILLUSTRATION]

AWOMANS INFLUENCE

BY LULU JAMISON

CHAPTER XlV—Continued. When Margaret reached home after her ride, during which her thoughts had not ceased to dwell upon her late bitter knowledge, she found that Brian had -arrived. Believed at the intelligence, yet feeling the impossibility of meeting him in her then, state of mind, she determined To feign a headache. Indeed her imagination was not geatly exercised for this end as a dull pain in her temples gave reality to, her excuse. If Brian had known the moment of her arrival she would not have escaped so easily, but he was in the library at the time, and Margaret was thus enabled to reach the w r elcome seclusion of her own room, from which safe retreat she listened for any chance sound that might reach her ears. Nanny had assured her that Brian had been made comfortable, and she also confided that he looked paler than usual and had been asking every live minutes if Margaret had returned. “The old refrain," thought Margaret, with a sigh. “He can spend days,away from me without regret, but if I leave him a minute here he complains.” Nanny was sent with the message that Margaret was indisposed, and hoped he would excuse her for to-night. She returned with a few lines that Brian had scribbled on the fly-leaf of a book. “Dear Margaret,” they began, “I am so sorry you are not well. Let me come up and sit with you. I promise to be very quiot, and my presence cannot hurt you. I miss you so much. It is dull down here, with only my thoughts for company. My miserable thoughts. Let me see you, if only for five minutes, Margaret. I am eating my dinner all alone. ’’ All alone! Poor Brian! “Let him see her, if only for five minutes.” A simple request, easily granted, and yet even five minutes was more than she could bear to-night. And so she answered the note. She thanked him for his sympathy. Her illness was nothing more than a headache, for which quiet was the best medicine. She could not see him to-night, though she was sorry he was lonely. She had eaten her dinner alone for two weeks. Arid Brian read these written words, but,he could not read between the lines.

CHAPTER, XV. Margaret discovers her needofchange. Margaret could not make her headache serve her another day without arousing suspicion, so she was forced to come to breakfast next morning, where she found Brian before her. He greeted, her with a warmth that expressed a variety of emotions, while she endeavored to show no change in her manner toward him. “I hope the headache has quite gone,” he said, taking his cup of coffee from her hand. “Yes, entirely,” she answered; “I feel ■quite well this morning. ’’ Her appearance belied her words, and so Brian thought as he regarded her rather Intently from his end of the table. Then a constrained silence fell between them. Margaret searched her mind for some remark. She found nothing but the question which she regretted as soon as it had passed her lips. “Did you enjoy yourself '” A change passed over his face, and he answered with an embarrassed air: “Perhaps you wouldn’t call it enjoyment, Margaret. I don’t know. Sometimes I wish I could think and act like you do. I would at least bo spared the misery of regret, and I daresay I would be happier.” “Indeed you would,” she interposed, quickly. “Not to think and act as Ido precisely. I do not mean that, of course, because I could never set myself up as an example; but if you would only be different. If you would not do the things which bring regret. ” “That is easily said, Margaret. I should be perfect if that were the case. I am unfortunate in the possession of a discontented nature, aud it can’t be well helped now. I believe people are born to certain things, and I am born to nothing. There’s Wilson. I was talking to him the other day. He’s a good fellow, but a crank in his way. I call him a natural doctor. Takes to it like a duck to water, and is in his element when he's tending a lot of sick, dirty children. Of course people admire those things; call him noble, unselfish, and all that. Well, I do, too. Yet I can’t do what he does. I’m of different caliber, I suppose. Some time ago lie told me he could get me in a hospital. It -was a splendid opening, no doubt, and any number of fellows were hung y for it. So I told him I’d be charitaole and let some other poor devil have it. He couldn’t understand my refusal. Why? Because his ideas and habits aredifferent from mine. I am sorry it is so.” “And I am sorry you have thrown away so many advantages, Brian. It is really a shame. I can have no patience with you. ”

Brian was silent under this outburst. Margaret’s ideas might be right in the abstract, but he had no desire to practically apply them to himself. “You blame me for a very common failing," he said after a moment. 'There are any number of men in New York today who have no business of any kind. Tney are well-to-do, of course, and they find plenty to fill their time. Here, however, it is different. There are no diversions, and one—“Must go to the city to seek them. I understand," said Margaret. “Under, the circumstances it is surprising that you honor Elmwood at all. Why not take up your residence in New York?'’ He regarded her with more than surprise. “Would you wish such an arrangement’” he asked, with much warmth. “Are you so ready and anxious to be rid of met How would you like the neigh- . borhood to discuss our affairs, and *’ Margaret laughed bitterly. “The neighborhood has already discussed them to its heart’s content. Be sure of that. I don’t believe I can be hurt more than I have been on that point. As to getting rid of you, you talk without reason or sense, Brian. There’d be no getting rid of y.ou, even if I regarded you in the light of a millstone around my neck; which I don’t —quite. Now, I’ve been thinking a great deal, and I have decided that as you cannot endure life here I’ll have to endure life in New York. lam going the*e next week. ” “To New York," repeated Brian, scarcely able to credit his ears. “I thought you said it would break your heart to leave Elmwood."

Margaret dropped her fork and stooped to pick it up before she answered: “Don’t bring up things I’ve said,” she returned, with sdme impatience. “One can’t be accountable for every word. I am determined not to be talked about, and I want to see something of this wonderful New York, where ‘life is so flexible that it can bend to every caprioe.’ Your expression, sir. You will have to find me a resting place. Not a house; that would be a bother. A small apartment will be best; please look for one, if you can find time from your important social duties.” “Yes,” said Brian, gradually recovering from his surprise. “I’ll do what I can, notwithstanding your sarcastic reference to my duties. Those sweet lips weren’t made for sarcasm. Don’t frown. I know I’m a daring fellow. I wish I could understand th : s sudden Whim of yours. It is sensible; I can’t deny that. I’ve thought several times that it would be delightful to spend our winters in New York and our summers here. I shall be happy to enjoy your society and the city at the same time.” Margaret did not reply to this, and when she spoke again it was on another topic. Brian found time to secure an apartment which seemed to Margaret suitable in all particulars, and as the time she had fixed upon for departure drew nearer she began to realize the cost of leaving Elmwood. Her life was so thoroughly identifiod with this home she had learned to love so dearly, her mind and heart so fully wrapped up in all connected with it, that it was a hard and real sacrifice to break up old associations, and look forward to an indefinite stay among comparative strangers and uncongenial surroundings. But the sacrifice had to be made, and it was better to make it soon, she argued. Dwelling upon it only made it harder, and after the actual leaving was over, the bitterest part, she could force herself to be contented in that great, busy city, which held no allurements for her.

She would have stolen away quietly, to have avoided the pain of saying-go jdby to her friends, but this was not possible; so the unpleasant experience had to bo encountered. The tearful grief of the rectory children, who had grown to look upon her as a second mother, tried her strength and resolution severely, and left her rather dreading her visit to The Cedars, in which she was sure to find the Colonel eo kind and sympathetic that it would be impossible to bear up. “If he only understood how it hurts,” she thought, making her wav to Alice’s room, “he would be only hard arid cold. People call the world cold and unsympathetic, but it seems to me that ” “I am only advising you, Alice; such tempers are hereditary, you know." These light words broke rather rudely upon Margaret’s melancholy reflections, and notwithstanding her state of mind, she was compelled to smile. “Nell, I declare,” she soliloquized, pulling aside the portiere and entering the room, to find the irrepressible young lady seated on a table, her feet dangling in the air and her laughing face suggesting the mischief her words had expressed. “Merciful fates! if here isn’t Miss Margaret!” she cried, jumping from her perch and rushing to greet Margaret. “You didn’t expect to see me? Well, I guess not, but here I am, as big as life and twice as natural. Thank heaven you’ve come. Take off your hat and coat. That’s right. Now you feel more at home. You’ll . Stay to lunch, of course? CUf, yesfyou will. You must; I’m a goner otherwise. Why my anxiety, you ask? Ye gods! what a want of comprehensicgi! 'And you know the old bear, too; have seen his little ebullitions of wrath, and noted the delicate pink that overspreads his expressiye features when somebody like me has an opinion—that dear, mild, beloved uncle of mine who tried to box my ears this morning and may be looking for me even at this moment. See, how I tremble,' and shiver, and shake. So stay, I pray you; stay to i aim the fire of his passion and throw oil on the troubled waters, as it were, Did you see him in your wanderings through the hall? Did you catch a glimpse of his seraphic, cherubic ?” “For mercy’s sake, be quiet,” put in Alice, interrupting Nell’s flow of eloquence. “You would set anyone crazy. Sit down, Margaret. I’ll try to keep you from being talked to death. You look tired already. ” “Generous creature,” retorted Nyell. "Take this chair by me, Miss Margaret. You’ll be safe, really. Yes, uncle and I had a glorious quarrel this morning. I can’t remember what about. I ventured to express an opinion on some subject, I dare say. He differed with me. So we had a regular battle. He ‘fit,’ as poor old Tom says, and I defended myself against the venom of his tongue. Alice merely grinned. When you came in I was trying to tell her that such tempers are hereditary, and therefore she’d better look out.” “Did she thank you for your advice?” “Thank me? Not she. Her nature’s too ungrateful. There now! I had a question to ask you, and I’ve forgotten it already. Oh, yes! Is it really true that you are going away? I heard so this morning. ” “Yes,” answered Margaret, with a sigh, “I am going 10-morrow.” “So soon?” asked Alice, coming behind Margaret’s chair and putting her arms around her neck. “How shall I ever get on without seeing you every day or so. I can’t let you go. ” Margaret clasped Alice’s hands in hers.

“If it is hard for you, how much harder it is for me,” she answered, “Please don’t be melancholy." begged Nell, with a quick glance at Margaret’s face. “Alice, go and sit down. You give me the blues, if I may be allowed so to speak, as one of my friends would remark. My disposition is really most solemn. I cry so easily that the slightest effort will bring an ocean of tears. Then my nose gets red, my freckles grow larger, and I’m a sight generally. So don’t make me weep. If you are going to .New York, Miss Margaret, I envy you. ’Cause why? ’Cause you’ve got money and can have no end of ,fun there. It’s different with us. We are poor, as Alice has no doubt told you, and it’s a nasty, mean, contemptible feeling. Poverty was the reason for our moving to Philadelphia, nothing in the world else. Our friends were told that we liked Philadelphia; lhat the air agreed with us—we are all so healthy we’d thrive in a pig-pen—when the real, unvarnished truth is the low rents agree with our pocket-books. I tell you, you don’t half know our tricks.” “Oh, Neil!”

“Just hear Alice say ‘Oh, Nell!’ as though she doesn’t know as well as I do the tricks of the guild. The guild means poor people, you know. Not poor washerwomen, need le women, scrubwomen, and such poverty-stricken wretches, but poor people like us, trying to keep up appearances on nothing. I abominate them, and I despise poverty so heartily that I’d rather be rich than go to heaven. Now it’s Miss Margaret’s turn to say ‘Oh, Nell!’ and how shocked she looks in the bargain. It’s evident she doesn’t know anything about scrap-

ing and soratohlng. It she'd lived in cheap flats I bet she’d agree with me. They are simply horrible. And when it comes to furnished flats —Lord, be meriful to me, a sinner! "We’ve had them, and I know whereof I speak. I remember one, especially. The greatest cheat on record. Handsomely furnished, the owner oalled it. We hadn’t been in it three days before all that handsome furniture tumbled to pieces. A case of familiarity breeds contempt, very likely. Now, I’ve grown suspicious. If I see a tidy on a sofa I want to know what is under it; and no matter how innooent the chairs-and tables may look Bitting around in their Sunday clothes, as it were, I know it’s ten to one that the tables will shed a leg and the chairs give up a back or seat just when one is seeking such support. You see, experience is a good teacher.” “Thanks for your oration,” remarked Alioe, as Nell paused for breath. “Your tongue, my dear, is one of those infant industries not in need of‘protection.’” “Nell’s experience rather frightens me,” remarked Margaret, with a glance at the late speaker. “Think of my furnished apartment, and what is probably in store ” “A furnished apartment,” broke in Nell quickly, “is as different from a furnished flat as a crow from a partridge. Don’t laugh at my comparison, please. I consider it particularly happy, and to return to the apartment, you probably pay from two hundred to three hundred dollars a month. Now we never aspired to anything so respectable. A flat, nothing more nor less than a flat, was the object of our ambition, and therein lies the difference. It is to enable me to one day live in an apartment like yours that I am now diligently searching for a husband. Beauty and blueblood desired. Money indispensable. If he’s young, well and good. If he’s old, so much the better. He’ll ’’ “No more, please,” begged Margaret. “I came hero expecting to be doleful, and you’ve made me laugh so ” “ ‘Comfort the sorrowful,’ ” quoted Nell. “A corporal work of mercy, my dear. I’ve performed a good action unconsciously. I’m an excelent young person, and, as you say, I can’t imagine how they manage to spare me at home. But to tell the truth, May is the important one just now. She is soon to be married, you see; and by some curious sort of reckoning, her value is increased fifty per cent. It is really a hard case. The two beauties of the family going off in this style, and leaving Bess and me to single blessedness. I rebel against such unjust decrees; I wish I was beautiful. Oh, don’t I wish I was beautiful! I’d like people to tumble into fits just from looking at me. What’s the matter, Alice?" “I’d be glad to make a few remarks,” was the answer, with affected meekness. "Poor child! Have you been waiting for my permission all this time? Certainly you can talk. Don’t pull down yoiu chin in that fashion. It reminds me of old Spenser when he indulges in Scripture. Scripture being something I’m totally unacquainted with, I don’t want it mentioned in my presence. Spenser ornaments his conversation with Biblical quotations;' therefore I hate Spen’ser. Besides, he says ‘Hadn’t oughter;’ and any man, woman, or child who says ‘hadn’t oughter’ ‘had oughter’ be shot: My private opin What, Ben! Luncheon! Grae!ous, I’m glad. I’m as hungry as a bear. Miss Margaret, pray take me under the shadow of your wing. Alice, lead the way. I smell fritters. Oh, my!” Expressing a mild hope that the combined influences of the fritters and her uncle’s presence might silence Nell’s busy tongue, Alioe did lead the way. |TO BE CONTINUED.;