Democratic Sentinel, Volume 16, Number 32, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 26 August 1892 — Page 6

®lje 3 cmocniticSeiitiiiel RENSSELAER, INDIANA. J. W. McEWEN, - - - Publisher

FIRE BELCHES FORTH.

ERUPTIONS OF TWO CELEBRATED VOLCANOES. Bow Old Vetinvlus Poured Out Destraction and Then Smoldered for Years-Terrible ■Work of Mt. Etna In 1160—Other Great Volcanic Mountains. Mt. Etna and Its Flames. Mount Etna is again in eruption, and for the eighty-fourth time is attracting the attention of the world. The earliest recorded,.eruption of ’Jitna is one mentioned by Diodorus Siculus, which —4 £4.-^—; l-a

caused the Sicanl to desert its vicinity and move further to the south. No date is given, but it is said to have taken place in the seventh century B. C. The most terrible eruption of the mountain -Which has ever been recorded was in February, 1169. An earthquake, felt for a long distance, destroyed Catrfnia

VESUVIUS, APRIL 26, 1872, AT 3 P. M.

and burled 15,000' people. The cathedral of the city at the time was crowded with people celebrating the feast of St. Agatha. The cathedral was ruined and the worshipers buried, together with bishops and forty-four Benedictine -monks. One side of the crater fell in. In 1537 a part of the village of

Nicolos! was destroyed. At this tins© a etream of lava ran for fifteen miles down the mountain. A terrible eruption occurred in 1669. During this eruption Nicoiosi, Belpasso, andapartof Catania were destroyed. Belpasso, a village of fl,ooo people, was destroyed by the outburst from a new crater which opened About a mile below the others and threw out a flood of lava two miles wide. Stopped for a time by the eity walls of Catania, the lava rose gradually to a height of sixty feet and finally rushed over the walls and destroyed a part of the city. Altogether some fifteen towns were destroyed by this eruption and lava thrown out covering an area of at least forty square miles. The latest eruption prior to the present one was in • 1886. This lasted about three weeks • and was preceded by earthquakes. Cinders fell as far distant as Messina, about eighty miles from Mount Etna. Mount Etna is one of the most noted »nd marvelous volcanoes in the world. It is located on the eastern coast of

Sleily, is 10,868 feet or more than two miles high, and its base has a circumference of about ninety miles. Some of the lava from its eruptions forms headlands several hundred feet high along the lonian Sea. The area of the moun-

tain is about four hundred and eighty square miles, and includes two cities— Catania and Aci Reale —and sixty-three towns and villages. It is estimated that as many as 300,000 people live on the sides of the mountain. The moun-i tain may be ascended, preferably between June and December. A party which ascended in August found it so cold near the top that extra coats were necessary. The abyss of the crater was found in 1877 to be about a thousand feet deep and some two or three miles around. Mount Vesuvius. The volcano of Vesuvius is more celebrated than Mount Etna, although it is only 4,000 feet in height, against the nearly eleven thousand feet of Etna. Probably Vesuvius has been nearly or| quite twice its present height The first eruption of Vesuvius of which there is any record occurred Aug. 24 in the year 79, during the reign of Titus, It is memorable not only as the eruption which destroyed Pompeii and Herculaneum and caused the death of

OBSERVATORY AND SUMMIT OF VESUVIUS.

Pliny, the naturalist, but also as having had his nephew, the younger Pliny, for its historan. He gives a most graphic description of this magnificent though terrible scene. “The cloud which had scattered so deep a murkiness over the day had now settled into a solid and impenetrably mass. It reeetabled less even the thickest gloom of night in the open air than the close and blind darkness of some narrow room. But in proportion as the blackness gathered did the lightnings around Vesuvius increase in thi ir vivid and scorching glare. Nor was their horrible beauty confined to the usual lines of fire; no rainbow ever rivaled their varied and prodigal dyes. “In the pauses of the showers you heard the rumbling of the earth beneath and the groaning waves of the tortured sea, or, lower still, and audible but to the watch of the intensest fear, the grinding and hissing murmur of the escaping gases through the chasms of the distant mountain. Sometimes the cloud appeared to break from its solid mass and by the lightning to assume quaint and vast mimicries of human or of monster shapes striding across the gloom, crowding one upon the other and vanishing swiftly into the turbulent abyss of shade. “Suddenly the place became lighted with an intense and lurid glow. Bright anil gigantic through the darkness which closed around it like the wails of hell the mountain shone —a pile of fire. Its summit seemed riven in two, or rather, above its surface there seemed to ri&o two monster shapes, each confronting

VIEW OF MOUNT ETNA.

each ae demons contending for a world. These were of one blood-red hue of fire, which lighted up the whole atmosphere far and wide, but below the base of the mountain was still dark and shrouded, save in three places, down which flowed serpentine and irregular rivers of the molten lava. Darkly red through the profound gloom of their banks they flowed slowly on toward the city. Through'the still air was heard the rattling of the fragments of rock crashing one upon another as they were borne down the fiery cataracts, darkening for one instant the spot where they fell and suffused the next in the burnished hues of the flood along which they floated. ” The effect of this eruption was to destroy the entire side of the mountain nearest to the sea, leaving the only remnants of the ancient cratce, the lower ridge on the south flank Er* called La Pedamentina, and that portion of the wall which under the name of Somma encircles about two-fifths of the new cone. This cone is the present Vesu-

DURING THE ERUPTION OF 1880.

i vlus, which has continued to be the ali most exclusive channel of eruption to I the present day. I In 1631 one of the greatest of modem j eruptions took place. The cone poured out a column of vapor so loaded with

ashes as to have the appearance of black smoke, and which assumed the usual form of a pine tree. The column of vapor was, carried over nearly b 0 miles of .country. At the same moment the summit of the cone poured out seven streams of lava, one of which destroyed two-thirds of Terra del Greco; a second Resina, which had been built on the site of Herculaneum; another the village of Granatello and a part of Portici. No less than 18,000 persons are said to have perished in this catastrophe. Other eruptions occurred in 1638 and 1660, when the crater was so cleared out that three distinct holes could be seen in action at the bottom of the hollow. From 1704 to 1708 there were frequent eruptions, the worst being in 17uZ, when .ashes, stones and lava were cast forth in great quantities, Naples being Aug. 4 covered with a dense shower of ashes. From 1712 to 1737 there were constant eruptions, being at times thrown to a height of 1,00” feet above the orifice from which they issued. The years 1751, 1754, 1758 and 1760 were also very turbulent. The mountain was comparatively quiet until 1834, when two streams of lava were thrown out, one over the margin of the crater, the other from the base of the old cone accompanied by a sea of flame. One stream lost itself in the Atrio del Cavallo, the other flowed down in avast currentof great rapidity, nearly half a mile broad and from eighteen to thirty feet deep.. It did not stop for eight days, and in its course it destroyed the village of Caposecco, leaving only four houses out of 500. In 1838-39 there were also eruptions of great violence. The crater was changed by the last outbursts, assuming the form of a funnel 300 feet deep, accessible to the bottom. Alter a few years of quietness the mountain again resumed business at the old stand. The night of Feb. 9, 1854, there was a terrific explosion and pouring out of lava, one stream reaching and utterly destroying Bosco Reale, the wood formed of stately oaks and ash trees. The large trees, as soon as enveloped in the seething lava stream, poured out jets of hissing steam from every knot and branch and then exploded with a loud report, shooting upwards of fifty feet or more. It formed a wonderful speotacle to see those large trees, burning briliantly, shooting through the air in every direction. This eruption changed the appearance of the mountain entirely. The walls of the old crater were broken down and the central cone reduced in height and form. After this Vesuvius beiame c mparatively peaceful, though it sputtered and shook the earth occasionally. During the first three months of 1868

ETNA FROM CATANIA HARBOR.

there were numerous outbursts from the top of the great ebne which caused it to reach a greater elevation than at any former period, the height April 3 being 4,253 feet above the level of the sea. At the beginning of 1871 the mountain again exhibited signs of activity, which continued throughout the year and culminated in the eruption of 1872. April 24 five streams of lava Issued from the great cone. During the night of the 25th a fresh stream of lava issued about half way dowu the side of the crater. A number of people had collected to view this, when a torrent of lava suddenly burst out close to the crater of 1855, and enveloped and killed a number of the sightseers. The 28th and 29th there was a tremendous outburst of ashes, which fell over the surrounding country as far as Naples, obscuring the daylight and entirely destroying the vegetation. Other Volcanoes. Iceland, as is well known, has a geological formation, and its hot volcanic eruptions form a strong contrast to its climate. Most of the mountains of the island have been volcanoes. Hecla, the most famous, is between 4,0 f 0 and 5,000 feet in height. It has eighteen recorded eruptions, the latest being 1845-6. The earliest known eruption was in 1104, which gave the name “sand-rain winter" to the season in which it occurred. Vast quantities of dust are discharged from the Icelandic volcanoes, a column of ashes said to be 16,000 feet high having arisen from Hecla in 1766. Popocatapetl, or, in the language of

THE CRATER OT VESUVIUS

the Aztecs, “smoking mountain,” is the most noted volcano in the Western hemisphere, and one of the highest mountains in either America, its snowcovered cone towering up 17,853 feet above the sea. At its summit there lies an immense crater about a mile across and more than a third of a mile in precipitous depth. Sulphur from the crater is or has been quarried at an elevation of 12,000 feet. During the last 300 years there have been but two or three eruptions, and those have been mild. Smoke constantly issues from the mountain, and at times cinders and stones are sent up in showers. Mount St. Elias, in Alaska, is classed as an active volcano, and exceeds Popocatepetl in height, the latest estimates placing its height at 18,100 feet. Interesting volcanic remains are tc be found in the western part of the United States and especially in Utah. The most interesting volcanic district in Utah is near Fillmore, where volcanic buttes and tables rest upon the plain at distances of ten to thirty miles apart. The Tabernacle crater and Pavant butte may be mentioned In connection with volcanic remains in Utah. The demonstrations accompanying a volcanic eruption depend upon the character of the material within the crater and the passage leading downward. If the crater has a thin floor and the passage below is partially open or filled with molten lava, the volcanic gases can escape upward and outward with comparative quiet. But if the passage is badly obstructed violent explosions may take place, preceded by rumblings, and even by earthquakes, far-reaching in effect.

RESCUED BY A FIREMAN.

Climb* Down on the rilot of Hl» ling-ln. and Llrtj a Child from the Track. At 10 o’clock yesterday forenoon 3-year-old Willie Fender, whose

mother was mixing bread around the coiner on Chestnut street, Englewood, wandered upon the tracks of the Chicago and Eastern Illinois Road. The little one was gazing at two boys

JOHN ENRIGHT.

across the way who were attempting to fly a kite. Down the track train No. 26 was just pulling out of the Englewood Station and was getting under full headway when the engineer saw the child. A blast from the whistle, a screaming of compressed air, the thunder of escaping

FIREMAN ENRIGHT SAVES THE CHILD.

steam, and the grinding of the great drivers as they spun backward on veneers of sand startled the passengers, and a hundred heads popped out of the windows. The little one stood been the rails unmoved, its eyes fastened upon the kite that fluttered and fell among the tangle of telegraph wire. Fireman Enright, sitting on his side of the cab, saw. the danger. Without hesitation he sprang through the window that opens at the side of the boiler and ran along the narrow footboard, jumped down on the brass covering of the cylinder-head, swung down under the monster front of the boiler, swiftly sped across the pilot, and slid down until his feet rested upon a narrow ledge at the bottom. Then with his left hand grasping the drawhead he stooped well forward. They were on the child, and its frightened eyes met the determined face of the fireman. With a vigorous lift and push the baby boy was thrown into the soft sand outside the rails. The wheels stopped a dozen feet beyond. Engineer Charles Shuneman reached his oily band across in front of the tubes and pipes and registers at the end of the boiler, and he trembled violently as he held the grimy hand of his fireman. “He’s all right,” said he And turned away to attend to his levers. Trainmaster F. L. Corwin, Conductor M. E. Burke, Supplyman L. D. Knapp and Brakeman W. J. Huber all ran forward. Trainmaster Corwin picked the child up, expecting to find It cut and bleeding, for no one except the engineer had seen the rescue. Then the engineer dropped down from his cab and told the story. A great crowd quickly collected. No one knew where the rescued infant belonged. The boys across the way stopped pulling at their kite-strings and joined the crowd. One little fellow elbowed his way through, and, when he saw the gingham dress and heard the lusty yells, broke forth in a clamor that drowned the efforts of his brother, for it was “Jimmie” Fender, little Willie’s brother. • Then a woman, her hands all flour, came hurrying into the alley. Her face was whiter than her hands. Into her arms they placed her baby unharmed, and as she hushed Its cries she listened to the story of its rescue. A violent shaking of the body and tears streaming down from her eyes was all the acknowledgment she could make.—Chicago Daily News Record.

Gould’s Ready Money.

How much is Jay Gould worth? His contemporaries, associates and critics put him down at about $150,000,000. I suppose it is not much exaggerated. We know, who are brokers and in the banking business here, the influence of his ready money. He has got the best money in the country; it is all liquid money, says Gath in the Cincinnati Enquirer. What do you mean by liquid money? Money which flows like a liquid—like quicksilver, according to the Inclination, upor down. The Astors, for example, do not have liquid money; their money is in real estate, upon which they could not realize in tight times as well as in easy times. But Gould's money is here in time of panic as readily as in flush times. Almost any time he can withdraw from the market $12,000,000 or can keep it loaned. Now, the bank surplus is only $10,000,000. So, you see the prodigious power that money has in the mere ebb and flow of it. When Mr. Gould withdraws it, as he is said to do, though 1 have ho knowledge on the subiect, the times are terribly tight here. Up goes the rate of interest. Men with obligations are ready to pay almost anything. This money comes to him in the nature of his property.

His property is always earning money in cash. If he resolves to purchase some costly piece of property, like the Union Pacific Railroad, he may put his money out to let interest accumulate upon it. He is not, however, a money lender in the sense of Russell Sage, who lends money to earn money. Mr. Gould lends money with an object in view, in the nature of a large merchant. Yet he is without the conditions of such a man—a polite person. A friend of mine not long ago borrowed $1,000,000 from him in the midst of the panic. This man did not conceal his temporary necessity, but said to Mr. Gould, or rather wrote to him, that whatever interest he was minded to ask would be satisfactory. He says that Gould said to

him, “Go along until you get through, and we will see about the rate then.” When they came to settle all that Gould asked him was ordinary interest—six per cent Such things he does quietly without further remark, and hence many persons who are not very intimate with him, but have had exchanges of that kind to take place, think of him with as much* respect as they speak of him. It must be remembered, however, that he has not lived this life and encountered long hostility and abuse to become a mere philanthropist. He is a gigantic merchant in transportation.

The London Lady-Help Movement

The “lady-help” movement started in London a few years ago was practically a dead failure, but an effort is now to be made to revive it in slightly different shape. For this purpose the Household Auxiliary Association has been formed. Both employers and applicants for situations are to supply references on registering their names as annual members. The ladles who take service are not to be required to take their meals or share a sleepingroom with regular servants, nor will they be asked to undertake scrubbing, blacking boots, or carrying heavy weights up-stairs, although special agreements may be made in particular cases. This is the plan adopted by the Gentlewomen’s Employment Association in Manchester, which has been in operation for a little more than a year, and has just issued its first report. From this it appears that the lady-helps are most desirous of finding situations as companions, positions which are about the most difficult of all to find. There is a good demand for nurses and plenty of ladies willing to undertake the duties of such places, but, curiously enough, most of the employers seem to think that “lady-helps” ought to be willing to work for much smaller wages than those paid to regular servants or even for no wages at all, for the sake of getting a comfortable home. In other words, they feel that they ought not to be called upon to pay equal prices for skilled and unskilled labor. If young “ladies” knew more about ordinary household duties they would be better fitted for making a livelihood if overtaken by misfortune. The problem now is how to divide the necessary preliminary instruction for women absolutely penniless and helpless, without setting them to common “drudgery.” Some day or other the association hopes to have funds for this purpose, but where they are to come from no one yet has the least idea.

The Temple of Baal.

There rises a huge wall seventy feet high, inclosing a square court of which the side is 740 feet long, says a writer in Blackwood’s Magazine. Part of the wall, having fallen into ruins, has been rebuilt from the ancient materials, but the whole of the north side, with its beautiful pilasters, remains perfect. As the visitors enter the court they stand still in astonishment at the extraordinary sight which meets their eyes, for here, crowded within those four high walls, 13 the native village of Tadmor. It was natural enough for the Arabs to build their mud huts within these ready-made fortifications, but the impression produced by such a village in such a place is indescribably strange. The temple, so to speak, is eaten out at the core, and little but the shell remains. But here and there a fluted Corinthian column or group of columns, with entablature still perfect, rises in stately grace far over the wretched huts, the rich, creamy color of the limestone and the beautiful moldings of the capitals contrasting with the clear blue of the cloudless sky. The best view of the whole is to be obtained from the roof of the naos, which, once beautiful and adorned with sculpture, is now all battered and defaced, and has been metamorphosed into a squalid little mosque. To describe the view from that roof were indeed a hopeless task. High into the clear blue air and the golden sunshine rise the stately columns, crowded, and jumbled, and heaped together below, untouched by the gladdening sunbeams, unfreshened by the pure, free air, lies all the squalor and wretchedness of an Arab mud-hut village.

Will Build an Unsinkable Boat.

A Leith, Scotland, boat builder is the patentee of a boat which he claims Is unsinkable and uncapsizablc. Hitherto he has constructed them of steel and he claims that owing to the manner in which the fore and aft sections, which are conical in shape, are permanently and hermetically sealed the boats are rendered unsinkable, even if filled with water, as the water runs back into the sea through the opening in the center board casing. The cruising yacht he is about to build will not be of steel, however, but of an aluminium alloy. The metal is as white as silver and possesses a breaking strain of twentyfour tons to the square inch. It is unaffected by water. The yacht, which instead of being painted will be polished, will be about thirty-two feet long and eight feet broad and will be provided with a roomy cabin paneled in oak and a commodious forecastle. The deck fittings, as well as a centerboard dingey which will accompany the yacht, will be made of the same white metal. If this experiment should turn ont successfully a new departure in yacht construction and fittings may be expected.

The Star-Spangled Banner.

English antiquaries now positively assert that the star-spangled banner was not evolved from the depths of the inner consciousness of a committee of patriots in the parlor of Mrs. Ross, in this beautiful Quaker City; and they point to sundry tombstones, monuments, and family records still extant in England as conclusive evidence that the starry and striped flag of Britannia’s runaway daughter was simply an outgrowth from the coat-of-arms of the Washington family.— Philadelphia Record. No matter how welcome a guest is, the hostess always looks a trifle dismayed if she brings a trunk instead of a valise.—Atchinson Globe. How nice it would be for the fellow with a savage mother-in-law to order a Pinkerton.—Columbus Post.

BIRTHDAY OF THE FLAG.

sane 14, 1777, Ushered the Stars and Stripes Into the World. The Quartermaster General of the Army has formulated a report, with a. lot of history regarding the origin md gradual development of the Stars

and Stripes. The clerks whom he set at work on the subject discovered that on June 14, 1777, the Congress, in session at Philadelphia, adopted this resolution: “Resolved, That the flag of the thirteen United States be thirteen stripes, alternate red and white; that the union be thirteen stars, white, in a blue field, representing a new constellation.” The thirteen stripes had been used before by the Philadelphia Light Horse, in 1775, but the stripes were alternate blue and white. Mrs. John Ross, who did upholstering on Arch street, is supposed to have been the maker of the first flag containing the stars and stripes. Although the resolution of June 14 was not promulgated by Congress until September 3, the flag was carried at the battle of the Brandywine on September 11. And then, from time to time in the nation’s history, stars were added to the galaxy of the field of blue, as new States were formed. A resolution providing for such changes was adopted in Congress April 4, 1818?. Otherwise no change has been made.

Berkman in Chicago.

The crank who assaulted Mr. Frick at Pittsburg, Berkman, or “Count Orlowitz,” as printers all over the country know him, was a “sub” on the Chicago Herald for a short time during the summer of 1890, He was not only a mystery but Was also the laughing stock of the craft, especially the members of it employed by the Heraid. His odd sayings and curious blunders were told and retold wherever compositors congregated. One story of the “Count’s" eccentricities will never die, and printers have regaled many a group of reminiscent typos with it, not only in Chicago but in Eastern cities. It so happened one hot night in ’9O that “the Count Orlowitz" was given a set of extra cases. About midnight the foreman had occasion to ask: “What gentleman is fixing up that pied ball score?” At the time the foreman was at the end of the room farthest from Berkman. But Berkman, yielding to that unconquerable desire to talk which everywhere made him conspicuous, immediately replied: “I don’t know, sir; I cawn’t see from here. ” “l am not speaking to you, ” said the foreman. “Well, I’m talking to you, see?” replied Berkman. Another peculiarity, and the one that brought about his discharge from the office, occurred one night after the Herald boys had won a hot fame of ball from some other of the city newspaper nines. He was put on about 9 o’clock by the pitcher, who had just set several good-sized “takes.” The pitcher was all ball play that night and made errors in tris composition. However, the two or more thousand ems set was ample remuneration for the sub’s pains in correcting them, bnt this Berkman declared to be a rank injustice. “I’m a printer,” he went on, “not a blooming blacksmith,” and he refused to make the corrections, which he claimed was a direct departure from all recognized rules. The more he looked at the proofs the angrier he became, and finally he seized his coat, collar, and necktie, and darted from the office in a terrible rage. He never came back again. The ominous warning somehow got to his ears that the foreman was waiting for him whenever he might come looking for work or pastime. The fellow always had money, however, and would lend it freely—-that is, if the borrower showed any inclination of engaging his services.

Bread from Blood.

Dr. Makarof has been making experiments in Russia with the blood of animals in the manufacture of bread. He made a dough composed of two and a half parts of rye meal and one and a quarter of blood. This he baked, and so produced a very good loaf of bread, which was not only fit to eat but also contained much more nourishment than ordinary rye or wheaten loaves. Dr. Makarof considers that some regulations should be issued to people who slaughter animals, requesting them to collect blood, which has hitherto been wasted, and send it to certain specified centers, where it could be made into bread and distributed to the peasantry in the grain, so that they are obliged to grind it down, and as in most of the districts there has been a great dearth of fuel, the baking of the bread has been a great difficulty, which in some cases' has proven insurmountable.

Hygienic Precautions.

A bill has just been enacted in New York State which contains many important provisions relating to the employment of women and children in factories. Under this law it has become illegal to employ women under the age of 21, or children under 18, for more than sixty hours in any week, or ten hours in one day. No child under 14 years is'permitted to work in any manufacturing establishment, and none under 16 years without affidavit from parents or guardians as to the child’s age. Not less than 250 cubic feet of air space shall be allowed for each person in any work room, where persons are employed between 6a. m. and 6. p. m. For nijrht work 400 cubic feet of air space is the minimum for each person employed. The hammock girl is in full swing.

OUR BUDGET OF FUN.

HUMOROUS SAYINGS AND DOINGS HERE AND THERE. Jokes and Jokeleta that Are Supposed te Her# Been Recently Born- Sayiafa aad Doings that Are Odd. Curious and Laughable. Sei .gored Smiles. “Are you busy?” asked the mug of the growler. “Busy is no name for it, ” replied the growler; “I’m rushed. ” —Judge Lady—“l wish to get a birthday present for my husband.” Clerk—- " How long married?" Lady—“ Ten years.” Clerk—“ Bargain counter, to the right.”—New York Weekly. “I’m going to get a hair cut this afternoon.” “You’d better get several.” Several hair cuts?” “No; several hairs cut. -Puck. “Dear Father: We are well and happy. The baby has grown ever so much, and has a great deal more sense than he used to have. Hoping the same of you, I remain your daughter, Molly.”—-Texas Shiftings. Jack—What are you feeling so blue about? Tom—l got into the habit of kissing Imogen whenever she got angry at me. Jack—Yes? Tom—And now her temper is completely ruined. —New York Herald. “The style of writing that you do must be very hard work.” Herbert—- “ Well, it is; but what made you think of it?” Gladys —“Why, it makes me tired to read it.”—Chicago Inter Ocean. Mrs. Van Leever—“Didn’t you once say that it was cheaper to move than to pay rent?" Van Leever (dubiously)—“Yes; but I was younger then. Now I’m convinced that it’s cheapest of all to burn out and get your insurance.”—Broooklyn Life. Mr. Smith (to Mrs. Parveuu, who has been telling him about her new house) —I suppose you will have dutab-waiters in the bouse? Mrs. P. —No, I shan’t. I had a deaf cook once, and I Vowed then never to have another crippled servant.—Brooklyn Life.

Farmer’s boy—There's going to be a minstrel show in Pinktown next week. Can I Old Hayseed—Gee Whittaker! It ain’t besn a month sence you went to the top o’ th’ hill to see the ’clipse of th’ moon. D'yuh wanter always be on th’ go?—Good News. W atts —“I usually manage to swallow most of these newspaper stories, but when they tell of an Indian in New Mexico digging his way out of jail with two toothpicks, I weaken." Potts—“l guess you never saw a New Mexico toothpick.” Journal. Three different waiters at a Southern hotel asked a little, prim, precise Harvard professional at dinner, in quick succession, if he would have soup. A little annoyed, he said to the last waiter who asked: “Is it compulsory?” “No, sah,” answered our friend and brother, “no, sah, 1 think it am mock-turtle.” Hard and Easy Lives.—Little girl—My papa has to get up awful early, so as to get to the office and see if his clerks is there attendin’ to business. Little boy—My papa don’t have to. He’s one of the clerks.— Good News. Country Bookseller (to miner who has previously invested in a dictionary)—“Oh, you must look among the S’s for scissors, not the Z’s.” “Well, how’s Oi to know? Wot’s t’ good of a dictionary without a hindex?”—Tid Bits. The story is told of an eminent divine and his bright boy that is not devoid of instructiveness. The father had a way of saying to his son when leaving home: “Remember whose boy you are.” The lad one day turned the tables by calling out to his father: “Good-by, papa; remember whose father you are.” New York Examiner. Lady (to servant) —Matilda, have you watered the flowers? Matilda Snowball—Yes, mum. I done watered ’em more’n two weeks ago.—Texas Siftings. .

Miss Mcßean (tourist from Boston) —“lt’s strange that the Sphinx keeps silent in the face of the remarks of these vulgar people.” Mr. Bacon (ditto, from Chicago)—“lt wouldn’t, I reckon, if it didn’t have lots o’ sand. ” —Smith, Gray & Co. 's Monthly. “I tell you,” he said disconsolately, “women are altogether too busi-ness-like nowadays.” “What’s/the matter?” “I proposed to the heiress yesterday.” “Did she accept you?” “No; she took out her notebook, wrote my name and address in it and said she would consider my application.”— Washington Star. Mr. Van Astor (settling his hotel bill at Barboransett Pier) —“I say, landlord, I don’t object generally to bills, but some of these items are outrageous. What’s that $8 for on the 10th?” The Landlord (with dignity) —“You forget, sir, that on that day we had your valise moved at your request from one side of your room to the other.”—Chicago News Record. “What’s all this dust on those wheels that were left in the carriage house last night?” the Bridgeport man asked of his hired girl, who held the lamp for him while he unharnessed the horse. “Sure, sir, it’s the insect powder.” “Insect thunder! What’s that for?” “And didn’t the man who brought them say as they were the ould buggy wheels that were to be kept here awhile? And I was that afeard the bugs would be gittin’ into the house that I thought I’d fumigate ’em, I don’t know.”

Siberian Milk.

The methods of Siberian milkmen are unique. The people buy their milk frozen, and for convenience it is allowed to freeze about a stick, which comes as a handle to carry it by. The milkman leaves one chunk, or perhaps two, as the case may be, at the houses of his custoier& The children, instead of crying Tor a drink of milk, cry for a bite of milk. The people there in the winter time do not day, “Be careful not to spill the milk,” but “Be careful not to break the milk.” Broken milk is better than spilled milk, though, because there is an opportunity to save the pieces.