Democratic Sentinel, Volume 15, Number 46, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 4 December 1891 — Page 6

TO CORRESPONDENTS.

t~ 4n oommanlctlon. for thia paper eboold be accom. sealed by the hum of the nolbor; not necessarily for publication. but as an aridence of good faith on the part •t the writer. Write only on one aide of the paper. Be yarftcuUriy careful, in giving names and dates, to have the letters and figures plain and distinct

TO DEFEND NEW YORK.

IMMENSE FORTIFICATIONS TO BE BUILT. One of the Standing Jokes on Uncle Sam to Be Terminated—Mortar Batteries ot Vast Destructive Power Will Be Mounted Behind an Improvable Fortress. • Coney ’lsland Cannon. The engineering department of the United States army has perfected the last details of the p ans for a work of vast importance, as it will complete the defenses of New York harbor against any known power of war These plans are for a great fort of modern mortar batteries, to bo constructed facing the ocean and defending the broad gateway of the harbor. The land on which this fort will stand lies at the east end of Coney Island and has been purchased by the Government for 490,000. For manv years tho engineers of the War Department have been casting solicitous glan es at the most dangerous omission in the lino of de enses about the ocean entran e to New York harbor, rendered every year more dangerous by tho improvements in carrying capacity and destructiveness of the guns placed on ships of war 'I his danger is a secret from no fore gn power. The Coast Survey charts in currency all over the world show it at a glaive and in graphic figures, resides the two or three narrow channels that are navigable through the entrance to New York harbor, in the waters between Coney Island and Sandy Hook, there is a pocket of deep water approaching the Long Island shore from the ocean, some miles cast of these channels, that is navigable

DEFENSES OF NEW YORK HARBOR.

to any vessel, whatever may be her draught. By means of this deep pocket a man-of-war could arrive at a safe anchorage in Rockaway inlet. Less than six miles away from this anchorage are the outlying wards of Brooklyn, two miies further is the East River, and another mile beyond is the heart of New York City. From this inlet a hostile ironclad could bombard Brooklyn and New York with a destruction unparalleled in the history of bombardment, and there could be no effective reply to this attack. Fort Hamilton and Fort Wadsworth, guarding the narrows between the upper and lower bays, would be nine miles away from the disturber, safely anchored in Rockaway inlet, and ' these forts have no armament that could throw shcl s such a distance. In 1883 Gen. John Newton and a body 'of engineers from the army made a critical examination of this pocket with a view to perfecting the defenses of the .great twin cities. They found that this -deep water cou’d be brought under ■effective fire in a circle having Plumb Island in the center with a radius of Six unties. They recommended the aequisi<ion of Plumb Island bv the Government and the immediate construction of

THE MORTAR BATTERIES.

fortifications there. Since that time several schemes have begn proposed for guarding the entranceto New York harbor th^t•“'kould include the do.onse of thtn decp water approach to the shore of Long Island. Soon after the act of 1 Congress approved Aug. 18, 1 90, to purchase lands for: defensive purposes. Col, G. L. GHlepie, constructing engineer of the fortifications at the f ort of New York ( was lnstructeg'by the War Department to examine into the feasibility of building defenses on Plumb bland. He raperted favorably on the scheme, and proposed the acquisition of fifty acres ot the island to be covered by mortar batteries. The land was owned bv the estate of William Engeman, represented by Thomas E. Pearsall/ of Biook.yn. The Government offered 850,000 for the fifty acres, for which the Engemans wanted 8150,000. The question of the value of the land was argued before a confcmission appointed by the United Stales District i. ourt By the decis on of this tribunal the Engemans received

THE MORTARS.

♦1,500 an acre for their land and $15,00i ■for the damages that the erection of the fort would do their adjacent p:opPlpmh Ig’and Is partly in the rear of thd,low bar of sand forming the eastern ■end of toney island known as Point Breese. The island has a low. slanting ’beach backed by a few sahd-hills and da* meadow land extends back for many ♦uaared acres The highest spot on the is . not, fifteen feet above mean *» " * ' ’** 1 ■

high, tide During tho heavy seas of early spring a large part of the island is under water. Its on y buildings are three fishermen’s shanties, now uninhabited. No drearier srot exists on the ocean shore than this isle of a hundred acres, whose air is polluted by the stenches from the fertilizer factories at Harren Island, just across the narrow inlet to Jamaica Bay. The importance of the work on this desolate little slip of sea sand can not be overstated. It includes the entire outlying ocean defense of the greatest of

LOCATION OF PLUMB ISLAND.

America’s harbors and tho protection from bombardment of its greatest cities. A glance at the map accompanying this article will show the location and strategic Importance of the new mortar batteries. They will command not only the deepwater pocket that would a low an ironclad to approach the shore from the ocean, but in the longest ranges of its guns <an defend the channels of the A arrows against the entrance of the foreign hostile fleet to the New York harbor. In case a fleet of warships succeeded in entering the lower bay it could join in the g.and conflict that would arise when they met the guns of tho forts that stand at the entrance to the upper bay. The Plumb Island n ortar batteries are to be arranged in two fortifications of earthworks standing side by side and facing the ocean at a southwest angle. Each fort is to be 600x400 feet, according to Gen. Henry C. Abbott, president of tho 1 card of engineers, in whose office the plans have been prepaiod. Tho ramparts of the forts are to be thirtyfive feet above ebb tide, and the guns will rest on a body of cement raised ten feet above the low water. The interior of each fort is to be divided into four pits, each containing four of those, terrible engines of destruction, 12-inch howitzers. The guns will be fired out of a great well, as the earthwalls of the fort wi'l rise twenty-five feet above the level on which tho cannons are operated. The mortars will thus be entirely invisible from the ocean. In the deep pits tho guns will bo perfectly protected from the impact of tho shot thrown by the enemy, as tho mounds cf eartli forming the ramparts are to bo of a thickness impenetrable by any known projectile Within each pit is to be a storage magazine for powder, protected by masonry and earth, and there are to bo extensive magazines for high explosives, located at some distance from the batteries. The powder magazines for each battery, will hold 100 tons. In tho rear two forts will not bo parquetted, but will be loft open. Tho thirty-two great guns for the two Plumb Island batteries are to be of tho new pattern of twe ve-inch mortars known as howitzers, of which successful tests have been made within tho last ten days at Sandy Hook. They are breechloading. and constructed on the built up plan, steel lined, rii.e borod, and stoolhooped. It is much longer than the old pattern of mortars and is capable of extreme accuracy in firing. The pro ectiles for one of those monster cannons, which, dropped on the deck of tho best armored Ironclad in existence, would pierce the entire ship, is of solid bulk of steel three feet long, weighing 625 pounds and costing .*3OO. Eighty pounds of powder will drive this largo project!.o eight miles. Tho gun will also throw shells containing high explosives. By this moans it can drop enough nitro glycerine on a ship's deck to scatter an ironclad into 10,000 pieces. it is one of the new twelve-inch howitzers whose detonation during its test firing shattered windows six mi os awayand wh ch with a single shot has destroyed 53,00 J worth of armor plating.

The Caravel Santa Malta.

Among the Columbian Exposition attractions is to be a sac-simile of the caravel Santa Maria, in which Columbus sailed. It is proposed to have this caravel as nearly exact as possible. It will be manned by Spanish sailors in the costume of the time of Columbus, and it will be rigged with the same sort of rigging that he used. There will be on board copies of the same charts that he had; sac-similes of the same nautical instruments. The crew will be of the same number, and it has been suggested that to carry out the truth of history there should be in the crew an Englishman and an Irishman, for, according to Navarrette, the eminent Spanish historian, William Harris, an Englishman, and Arthur Lake an Irishman, were members of Columbus’ crew. There will also be a notary on board wearing the ancient costume, and representatives of all other functionaries who accompanied Columbus. It is proposed to have this vessel make its first appearance at the grand naval review, which is to take place in the harbor of New York, where the little ship will be saluted by the monstrous cruisers of modern invention, representing all the navies of the world. Atthecloseof the naval review it is proposed to have this vessel transi ferred, with ceremony, by the representatives of theGovernmentof Spain, to the President of the United States, and then have it towed through the lakes and Welland Canal to Chicago, i where it will be one of the most interesting features of the exposition.

A Cold-Blooded Husband.

A coroner sees many curious sights, j Deputy Coroner was telling I of a circumstance that came under his j notice recently that surpassed every- ! thing ever heard of in the way of heartless indifference. He was called to investigate a case where a man’s wife had died very suddenly. It was plainly a case of heart failure, but the husband insisted on an autopsy. He not only wanted the autopsy, but rhe wanted to see it performed. The body was placed on a table and the doctor began work. The husband watched every movement very closely. Finally the liver and heart were,exposed and the heart was found to be greatly en- : larged. The husband, more’ Meekly j interested than ever, stepped forward I and took hold ot the heart with his fingers. “It made my blood run cold,” said the deputy, “and I pushed the man away.” He seemed to resent the coroner’s action very much and insisted i on knowing what caused his wife’s j death. The doctor explained that it • was caused by an enlargement of the I heart. “Wall, by thunder!” mused tire ! man, “I don’t understand that. I • supposed a big heart made folks gen--1 erous like, but that woman was the • dumdest, stingiest critter lever saw." I —St. Louis Star.

"PREACHER OF NATURE.”

AReformca Prussian Soldier Who Believes In Dress Reform and a Simple Religion. Johannes Guttzeit, the so-called “preacher of nature,” who attracts considerable attention in the famous old city of Leipzig, is an ex-Prussian army officer, who has taken up his abode in that hotbed of German socialism. He is a tall, handsome man, and he affects a curious costume which excites amusement and astonishment alike in strangers. His shoes are heavy and low cut; darkgray woolen stockings reach to his knees; his trousers of white wopl cover the upper part of his legs, while a broad, loose gown of the same material falls almost to his feet. This gown is fastened about his body by two long rows of buttons and a waistgirdle of cloth. On his head, from which long hair falls to his broad shoulders, he wears at times a crown of leaves. Guttzeit was born in Koenigsberg, Prussia, in 1853, and was a member of a wealthy family. He early showed a liking for the life a soldier and entered the army in 1871. For a number of years he served as a lieutenant and differed little from his comrades. At the end of that time, however, he determined to quit the service in order to give to the world his religious and sanitary theories. He advocates a return to the simple life in vogue in the days of the apostles and is a strict vegetarian. He is a dress

A SOLDIER TURNED PREACHER.

reformer, an eloquent and impressive talker, a lyric poet of some ability, and his published works on his theories in religion and dress have had a wide circulation.

A KING CRAB FROM JAPAN.

He Is Eighty Years Old and Has a Stretch of Eleven Feet. The king of crabs ornaments the cabin of the British steamship Euphrates, which arrived from Japan with a cargo of tea, says the New York Recorder. He is the biggest specimen of his kind ever seen in New York, and is known as a lion crab. Capt. James Edwards, the commander of the Euphrates, and his crew had a lively time in capturing the crustacean. He was seen when the vessel was at Hakodate, Yezzo. Efforts were to capture him alive, but he fought so valiantly that he lost his life in iiis struggle to escape. He was palled aboard and stuffed as a curiosity, and now occupies a place against the wall of Capt. Edwards’ cabin, with an inscription in Japanese above, which, translated, means “a thousand miles in a thousand minutes.” He will be taken to the London Zoological gardens. He is valued at $250. In his native element the crab was of a deep green color, but in death he became red. The body is round, resembling that of a turtle, and is 7 inches thick and 40 inches in circumference. There are 10 legs, the forward ones measuring fit inches in length' and the hindmost pair 25 inches. The pincers of the forward legs are each 0 inches in length; the first joint is 22 inches, the second 8 inches, and the third 25 inches in Length. The distance from claw to claw measures 11 feet. His appearance indicated that he might have made a, fierce battle for his captors and afforded food enough when killed for the entire ship's company. One of the sailors, a Japanese named Karena, explained that the lion crab is a very rare specimen and difficult to capture. He is supposed to move at the rate of a mile a minute, and is held in reverence by many as the religious sects in Japan. He grows an inch every year, and this particular crab ■is supposed to have been nearly 80 years old at the time of his decease.

Helpful Ailments.

The value’of cow-pox, voluntarily' induced, as a protection against smallpox, is generally recognized. The' same principle has been successfully extended to some of the worst diseases among animals, and it is expected that it maj’ yet be applied in the case of some virulent human diseases. In England gout is a very prevalent and painful disease. In this country it is less common. Our climate inclines us to excessive mental activity. As a result of this the brain appropri-, ates nervous force at the expense of digestive system, and so disposes us to dyspepsia; but dyspepsia compels its victims, in spite of themselves, to indulge somewhat sparingly in rich food, in the too free eating of which gout originates. Of the two diseases, dyspepsia is to be preferred. It seldom interferes with the day’s work, and, except in very obstinate cases, is almost certain Co be relieved by proper diet and exercise. Sick headache may often be counted in the class of helpful ailments, though it is a “bitter pill.” There are two forms of it: cne has its primary source in the brain, the other in the stomach. In both cases there is commonly some hereditary tendency to the disease, but the exciting cause is overwork; of the brain'in one case, of the stomach in the other. The headaches necessitate »cCasional rest, while the dread of them acts as a constant check upon ten-

dencies which might otherwise result in grave harm. Indeed, attention to diet, with a little letting down of the average cerebral activity, professional, business or domestic, willgenerally insure a comparative immunity from attack. Acute rheumatism often gives rise to permanent heart trouble. Chronic rheumatism, on the contrary, may be healthful in cases of heart disease. For instance, enlargement of the heart tends to increase Until it reaches the dangerous limit. The patient’s safety depends largely on his training himself to such habits as reduce strain on the heart, rheumatic joints in the lower limbs are an admirable aid in this respect. The former rapid movements cease. A fatal running to meet the cars or the ferryboat is out of the question. The rheumatism is an uncomfortable companion, no doubt, but it may help to a long life—a decade«or more, perhaps, beyond the three-score and ten.—Youth’s Companion.

A CITY OF RUNAWAY HORSES.

Dangerous Character of a Stroll in Bangor —The Wild Maine Colt, The report of the statisticians that more lives are lost in the United States every year through runaways than by railroad disasters will be readily believed by Maine people, for in that state the runaway horse often causes more fatalities in a single month than can be laid to the railroads for the entire year. Almost every other man in Maine owns a horse of some kind, but only a small proportion of the owners are horsemen, and the horses for the most part are a wild, untrained lot, easily frightened by the breaking of a breeching, tug or whiffletree, or by any of the numerous little accidents that are liable to occur at any time. Thousands of fine colts are raised in Maine, but few of them are properly broken, with the result that the state is filled with unmanagable, dangerous horses. Bangor has long been noted for the runaways that occur almost daily iu its streets, and so pronounced has the nuisance become that in certain localities pedestrians are in more danger than they would be in crossing West street or Broadway in New York. Bangor is the center of a large farming district, and hundreds of untrained colts and green horses come into the city every day from th.? rounding country. At’this s&lson of the year several hundred farmers’ teams are daily huddled together in the open market places of Pickering and Haymarket squares, and when a runaway occurs there the results are disastrous. The principal streets of the city are traversed by an electric railroad, and the cars on the line, with their peculiar noise and occasional emission of sparks, are tho pet aversion of the country horses. It is no unusual thing to sec a horse or a pair of horses, attached to a heavy cart, go tearing along one of the crowded business streets, wrecking carriages and knocking down pedestrians in thek path, and perhaps finally taking to the sidewalk and crashing through the front of a shop. Four and five runaways frequently occur in a single day and the exciting events are a fruitful source of 'items for the local newspapers. Occasionally human life is sacrificed. Within a year two of the most eminent lawyers of the city, the Hon. Lewis Barker and ex-Judge James F. Rawson, have met their death in the streets from runaway horses, and matters have reached such a stage that a promenade in a saw-mill is a safe undertaking compared jvith a stroll in Bangor’s business streets.

Ohl Aztec Mines.

A gHAip of old Spanish or Aztec mines have recently been discovered at Las Placitas of this county, about twenty miles from this city, says an Albuquerque (New Mexico) correspondent of the St. Louis Republic. So many years have elapsed since these mines were worked that all trace of their history has been lost and the present inhabitants of the country knew absolutely nothing aboiit them. Prospectors recently got on to the trail of what they thought was something good, and by pushing their investigation came upon unmistakable evidences of what were undoubtedly once rich workings. A very extensive system of underground work has been brought to light. The mineral discovered, while not of the highest grade, Is rich enough to pay handsomely, and runs generally from SSO to S6O to the ton. The remains have been found in several places of what were once furnaces for smelting the ore. There are also large quantities of slag, and in several instances have been found what are clearly remains of implements used by the workmen. But what will still be more interesting to the general reader is that these explorations have developed unmistakable evidences of the fact that the woi*k on these mines which was performed nobody knows how many centuries ago, was brought to a summary conclusion by an earthquake or general upheaval of some sort, for not only are the mine workings, smelters, furnaces, etc., buried under some fifteen feet of earth, but there have been found on the same level the ruins of what was once an aqueduct for bringing water to the camp from a source about ten miles distant. The camp of Las Placitas, referred to, is on the eastern slope of the Sandia Mountains, about twenty miles from Albuquerque, and promises to become one of the most interesting fields of archseological research yet discovered in this country.

A Telegraph Blunder.

Thirty pupils of a deaf and dumb school in Virginia started for home over the Baltimore and Ohio Railroad last week. The conductor of the train telegraphed to Parkersburg, “I have thirty mutes on board. Be prepared to receive them.” The dispatch was received all right, but the operator read it mules instead of mutes. Two cattle-cars were awaiting his train as it pulled into Parkersburg.

* The Refinement of Gallantry.

Fair but unfortunate maiden— Dear me! That’s the twentieth time I’ve had to get up to let some fellow get by. It seems as if every man in the house wanted to pass me. Gallant but crude companion—Can you blame them?

A GOWN FOR CALLING.

One of the Newest and Most Striking of Fashion’s Fancies. Oee of the latest models is a closefitting coat of black broadcloth, with skirts which are long in the back and sides, but slope away in front, to show a deep waistcoat of watermelon pink cloth, which has row's of black braid forming a series of points down the front. The collar is flaring and does not clo§e. It is lined with black velvet. A very handsome calling gown is made of biscuit-colored vogne,

and embroidered on the front of the skirt with silk, shading from biscuit to cinnamon brown, with a touch of gold here and there to illuminate it. Around the bottom is a ruche of cinnamon brown feathers. The coat bodice is very long in the back, but only covers the hips; it is opened over an embroidered waistcoat which fastens with small gilt buttons. The high flaming collar and revers are faced with brown velvet and edged with the feather trimming. The felt hat is the same color as the dress, and is trimmed with cinnamon velvet, ribbons, and feathers.

A PECULIAR PRODUCT.

Nicaragua LLas a I'ialii with a Single Leaf Thirteen Feet Long. Nicaragua has one of the most peculiar plants to be found anywhere. In 1869 Dr. Berthold Seeman discovered it and in 1872 it was forwarded to Mr. Hull, an English horticulturist. It was a plant with a single leaf and the latter was thirteen feet

and eight inches long. It somewhat resembles the Indian turnip. The spathe of the plant contained a flowering portion over four feet in length. In honor of a Mr. Godwin, an intimate friend of Dr. Seeman, the plant was called the Godwinl. During the flowering time the plant has a most disagreeable odor.

Seal Poaching.

Here is the method employed by the hunters of British Columbia who poach upon the sealing grounds: When the schooner sights a seal the little boats are lowered: A hunter armed with two shotguns and a rifle and two sailors to pull the boat take their places and the hunt begins. The boat is pulled quietly toward the animal. In nine cases out of ten the seal takes alarm and dives out of sight before the boat is brought close enough to use the guns with effect, and in no case does the hunter shoot unless he feels sure of his quarry. The seal when shot at once commences to sink, and the boat has to be pulled rapidly up to it, when the body is “gaffed” and hauled aboard. This is repeated as long as a seal can be seen. In many cases only one or two will be killed during a two days’ hunt, while at other times as many as twenty will be taken.

A Feminine Triumph.

Old Lady—No use talkin’, I .used to say this higher education of gals was all folderol; but I see I was wrong. There’s my granddarter, for instance. She’s just a wonder. Friend—l understand she graduated with high honors. Old Lady—Yes; graduated from Vassar, and she kin do what neither her mother nor me could ever hope to do if our lives depended on it. Friend—lndeed! And what is that? Old Lady—She kin tell the time a train is goin’ to start by lookin’ at a railway guide.—New York Weekly.

An Antique Custom.

The English people are very fond of keeping up antique customs. In olden times the Fruiterers’ Company of London annually presented twelve baskets of apples to the Lord Mayor, and the Lady Mayoress put a bottle of wine in each of the empty baskets for the carriers, who were also given a dinner. Of late years pineapples, nectarines, peaches, and other choice fruits have been substituted for apples, and thia year the ceremony was observed Oct. 1. t

A YOUTHFUL SPECULATOR.

He Corners the Shoestring Market and Makes 555.000 tn Three Months. A coterie of traveling salesmen in the lobby of the Palmer House, Chicago, were discussing the subject of fortunate investments and enterprises that have proved unusually profitable when one of the gentlemen remarked: “The queerest case that I ever knew of this kind was that of a boy at Andover, Mass. The youngster was the only son of an old cobbler who had mended shoes and boots all his life and had saved enough to buy a modest home and to lay up a small balance in the bank. The old man died awhile ago, leaving everything to his overgrown, gawky, shiftless son. “The latter never did a day’s work in his life, and as stoon as he found himself the possessor of the little shoe shop he at once commenced casting about for a purchaser. He soon converted his property into cash. Then he went down to a suburb of Boston to talk with the manager of a large factory that turns out abouj half of the shoestrings made in thin country. The youngster Contracted for the entire output of that shoestring factory for one year! Then he went to another large manufactory at Newark, N. J., and secured a similar contract. “These two institutions are the only shoestring factories in America. The shoestring business for the ensuing year had been cornered, excepting the goods that were already in the hands of wholesale shoe men in New York, Boston and Philadelphia. The young speculator invested his cash in buying up this stock, and within a few weeks had everything in his own hands. This was a corner which the trade had not foreseen. Shoe dealers throughout the country who had ordered their usual stock of goods were horror stricken to learn that there was a shortage in shoestrings. Well, now, shoestrings are very small things, but they are quite necessary to the shoe business. Within three months the Andover boy sold his contracts with the manufacturing concerns at a net profit of $55,000, and if he had had nerve enough to continue the fight he undoubtedly would have made double that amount.”—Chicago Mail.

A CURE FOR CROUP.

Simple Remedy for the Terrible Affliction Dltcovered In France. Several papers of Paris have published that Dr. Laugardierre, of Toulouse, had at different times experimented with success with a new treatment of sure efficiency for the cure of that terrible disease, the croup. The new treatment consists in the use of sulphur. Dr. Laugardierrp narrates thus his first experiment in the Paris Temps: “I called for some sulphur powder, took a tablespoonful of it, which I diluted in a glass of water, ordering to drink one tablespoonful of the mixture every hour, shaking it before using. Next day the child was better. New potion for the next day. The following day the child was cured. The only thing left was a loose cough, which I attrib 6 ted to the false membranes circulating in the tracheal artery. Asking the parents to save it for me in case the child should expectorate them, two days later a sudden lit of coughing expelled them, and three dried-up pieces the size of a large bean were brought to me. ” After that cure the Doctor obtained several others, but none more convincing than the following: “A little girl was dying; neither cry nor the least sound could come from her larynx; the pimples of diphtheria were on the ears, neck, head and cheeks; her wheezing breathing could be heard twenty meters off.” The Doctor had secured a probe to insufflate nitrate of silver into the larynx. The parents opposed that, but consented to make the child swallow the sulphurated potion during the night. “On the next day the child, which I had considered as lost, was resuscitated—the voice was restored; the potion was continued during that day and the next day the child was cured.” The communication of Dr. Laugardierre is of too much importance not to be the subject of a serious and immediate examination, and it is for the Academy of Medicine to order such.

The Pig in China.

.Chinese life is a perpetual surprise. Man’s most faithful four-footed friend, the dog, is relegated to the outcast world and his place filled with the more edible pig. Under these auspices, the dog reverts to the ancestral wolf, and is hardly distinguishable from that disagreeable brute, while the hog becomes a distinguished member of society. Every Chinese porker has a name, and answers it, especially when called to meals, as promptly and knowingly as a welltrained watch-dog. He lives with the family, and sleeps either on the foot of his owner’s bed or else in the baby’s crib. After breakfasting en famMle, he sets off on a constitutional walk through the city and suburbs. He makes calls upon other pigs of equal social standing, invades and sobs every garden whose gate may be open, and usually refreshes himself by a walk in the surf on the beach, where he whets his appetite with a dozen oysters on the whole shell and a few defunct fishes.

Ride and Tie.

“Ride and tie” is an old Salem saying. Two men would start out on a journey with one horse. One would ride a specified distance, then, dismounting and tying the horse, he would walk on to the next changing place, where he would find the horse tied and waiting for him, having bepn ridden there by the man who started out afoot. And so the whole distance would be traversed, each one riding and walking in turn. The item “Ride and tie and go to Boston” is found in an old account book, at a charge of “four and sixpence.”

lilfetim. of Saloon Uta.

The average lifetime for proprietors of beer saloons is 51.35; proprietresses of beer saloons, 51.95; brewers, 42.33. Inquiry has shown that the male proprietors of wine rooms live but forty-nine years, and women Who keep wine rooms but forty-seven.

■MOR OF THE WEEK.

STORIES TOLD BY FUNNY MEN OF THE PRESS. Many Odd, Curloua, and Laughable Phases of Human Nature Graphically Portrayed by Eminent Word Artiste ot Our Own Day. These Clever Impromptus. Bul finch—That was a wonderfully clever speech that your husband just made; and he tells me it was entirely impromptu. Mrs. Wooden—Oh, yes; quite so. Bulflnch—lt is marvelous that he could do so when he looks so tired. Mrs. Wooden—Well, I should think he might look tired; he sat up all night thinking what he’d say. The Way with Women. Mrs. Greyneck—Oh, I’m so tired! I’ve been shopping all day long. Mr. Grey neck—l suppose you spent the ten I gave you this morning. Mrs. Greyneck—Every penny of it. Mr. Greyneck—What did you get? Mrs. Greyneck—Oh, I didn’t get a thing, it all went for car fares. i Rather Cruel. 1 Miss Freshly—Anything new up in the country to-day, Farmer Green? Farmer Green—Wai, yes’m. They be a sayin’ that the hog cholera’s cornin’ ’long our way. •Miss F.—My! I don’t wonder you look worried. Knew His Own CaUber. Sappy—l say, Chappy; I’ve wather got the ideah that I nevah could be an actah, dontcher know. Chappy—What’s the weason, deah boy? Sappy—Why, old fellah, dontcher see, there’s a wtil£‘ I’Ve wead someweah that weads, “think twice befoah yomahet.” That would whin me; it’s moah than a fellah can do now to think wunth, and. I should justexpiah jf I -had "to think twice, ba Jove!

This is a dog. Has the poor dog the mumps? Oh, no; he has not the mumps. He only tackled a man with a wooden leg; that’s all. Knowledge Is Wealthy £ Druggist—“ You might have charged man two dollars fpr filling that prescription. Why did you put pnee at twenty-flVe cents?" understands D®tfo.*v Tba-Grwwlng in California.:. ’ Experiments in growing the tea plant are being tried in Southern •California. Making It Realistic. Quester —I wonder where Shakspeare got the idea reflected in the sentence, “When graveyards yawn." Based altogether on superstition, I imagine? ‘ Jester —Perhaps, although I can believe such a thing possible to be brought about? Quester —How? Jester—By having Dominie Prolicks visit any one of them and preach a funeral sermon. After a Day’s Shopping. Mr. Stinter (examining some accounts on desk) —I think I prefer the courting to the wedded day’s. Then there was alternate billing and cooing; now it seems to be about all “billing.” Doubly Defined. Tommy—What is a “running account?” Pa says it’s an account merchants have to keep of customers that are in the habit of running away from paying their bills. Uncle—That’s one definition of it. Tommy—ls there another? Uncle—Yes. A running account is, in some instances, an account that gets tired out running after a while, and then it becomes a standing obligation. Accounted For. Gotleft —You say our party is in bad odor with the public. How do yotr account for it? Sageman Easily enough. Yon have a chronic habit of handling dead issues. An Experienced Burglar. Young Burglar—“ These spoons ain’t silver. They are the cheapest kind o’ imitation.” Old,Burglar—“That’s lucky.” “Lucky?” “Yep, Take’em along.” “What f er?” “The leddy of the house will be afeared to set the detectives arter us, lest they should find them spoons an’ describe ’em in th’ papers. "-—Street & Smith’s Good News. —I The Pessimist’. View. An optimist is not an .optician, though both look at the world a great deal through glasses.—The Jewelers’ Circular. ' '*** k ■ ’ w;,,: : . r j J£, yj Z When Merchants Have No Money. Mr. Valfse—iWill you allow me to sell Busteed & Co.? Principal—They failed recently. Mr. Valise —But they settled at 100 percent. . Principal—Then they can’t have any money. You haa better avoid them.—-The Jewelers’ Circular.

2 Not In the Book.

The idiohls Of the English language add not a little to its beauty and usefulness; but they are sometimes capable of an interpretation <uite different from the one intended. A lady famed for her skill in cooking was entertaining a number of friertds at tea. Everything on the table was much.admired; but the excellence of the sponge cake was especially the subject of remark. “Oh,” explained one of tne guests, “it is so beautifully soft and light! Do tell me where you get the recipe!” “I am very glad, ” replied. the hostess, “that you find it so soft and light I made it out of my own head,” >